Alicia Jackson and Pep Conley

Recorded October 29, 2021 Archived October 29, 2021 22:30 minutes
0:00 / 0:00
Id: mby021192


Significant others, Alicia Jackson (49) and Pep Conley (54), share a conversation about the lessons they have learned in life, trust, honesty, relationships, and about their lives growing up.

Subject Log / Time Code

PC and AJ talk about some of the most important lessons they have each learned in life.
AJ and PC talk about trust and about how trust functions differently in different relationships.
AJ and PC discuss the idea that opposites attract and talk about what that idea means in different contexts.
AJ and PC talk about compromises in relationships.
AJ and PC talk about finding common ground with other people and about different interests that people have.
PC and AJ remember the first time they met.
AJ talks about undergoing surgery and the support she received from PC.
AJ and PC talk about each of their families and their upbringings.


  • Alicia Jackson
  • Pep Conley

Recording Location

Columbus Public Library



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00:02 Hi, my name is Alicia Jackson. My age is 49. I'll be 50 on November 6th, which is actually this Saturday, which is October. I mean, next Saturday, November 6th, which is a week from today, which is Friday, October 29th, 2021 the location of live in Columbus, Georgia.

00:26 My interview partner will be Timothy Conley. His relationship to me is he's my significant other my partner my provider, am I?

00:40 Soulmate.

00:46 Are you doing 54 years old here in Columbus, Georgia on, October 29th?

00:55 I'll be interviewing with my partner. Alicia Jackson.

01:01 Been together, what 11 years now, and hopefully be more.

01:10 I guess one of the courses at take it out and about to get our conversation started is

01:20 What is one of the most important lessons you have learned in life? Damn?

01:31 You definitely can't believe everything you hear.

01:38 People tell you things and it really hurt.

01:46 Yeah, well, you don't believe everything you hear in life because people tell you things are not necessarily be true.

01:58 So you got to follow your own intuition, a lot of things.

02:02 Like what?

02:06 I'll be over your beliefs or whatever. You grew up believing and things sound too good to be true. So I telling you something it's probably is too good to be true cuz he's probably false.

02:20 One of the lessons that I've learned through life is to be patient, to be honest.

02:29 And to be,

02:32 To be yourself.

02:35 And since I'm being honest, you know.

02:42 If first, you have to be honest to yourself before being honest to other people, because if you don't have honesty within yourself, you can't have understood what people to trust somebody.

02:57 Is 2.

03:02 To have that.

03:05 A notion that.

03:07 They're there for you when you call on them.

03:13 That there be there for you when you need them. Also.

03:19 Trust, go to Waze.

03:23 And if you can't trust nobody.

03:31 A world can go Go. I mean, your world can go with different way.

03:36 Because y'all be always looking over your back.

03:40 Or.

03:43 Just something.

03:46 Trust how many forms also too and when one people think trustee is other person but not

03:56 Sometimes things get misconstrued it like that. He might think trust has his the simplest form when I can trust you to pick me up from work, but, you know, it's a lot of people think about some more deeply than that.

04:10 I'll be in late though, or it's not always picking you up on time. Somebody else will get in the simplest forms of people getting more more deeper than that.

04:27 You know what, you know, what am I trust in a relationship, you know because you have to have trust, you have to trust the person when you're in a relationship to know that date that you have, they back. But I mean, but like I said, what's up? You think Chelsea is up. He might not and it's hard. It's hard to tell.

04:48 It won't wait more easy for us to break trust or something than the other people love people is not as forgiving. They love you or so. And that trusted, mine can be broken easily. What's up? What do you think if somebody break your trust? How do you think that you can gain their trust back?

05:08 That's a difficult one. I made is actually believe that. Depends on how the trust was broken.

05:15 I mean, you know what, go to the screen and infidelity.

05:20 A lot of a lot of people mainly women that some men to their more forgiving than most People Meet myself. That's the only unforgivable offense and it shouldn't be like that, but that's what it is for me, you know.

05:36 Yeah, but man, I think sometime me and if they do an infidelity, they expect that. That woman should take them back.

05:47 It's all because they do, you know, they do the extra mile the trying to to please her. It is not the only stare mean. It's going to be sincere and they going to make it say what they think. You want to hear the process of trying to get your behavior.

06:13 All right, that is true. But then sometime if that person take them back, you know, what if they are some might have have that.

06:26 It would try to do that deal again, you know, and then that trust is broken and can it can't be rebuilt cuz he can't, you know, I mean people chances over and over, he's not no mistake. I don't know that. That's what that's a pattern. You know mean how you are.

07:14 You got to realize, you don't realize that people go years and years and unhealthy relationships, you know.

07:23 Money. Got you. Got to somebody got to draw the line somewhere.

07:27 The fact you want to be alone or not. You got to draw a line and can't nobody to be with you.

07:32 Not like the way it is. I understand that too.

07:37 That's why I learned. It was going to be yourself. You got to be true to yourself.

07:43 That's the most important thing.

07:45 To be the best, you you can be.

07:48 Always.

07:51 Always trying to be you.

07:57 Is written in stone. Do you know in black and white is always the Shaded grade? And almost every situation the best of the relationship and give 100 per-cent. Of course, going to be on the same page. First start.

08:21 Yeah, also track here. That attract stay together. It's going to work.

08:32 No, I'm such a good girl, little bad boy. You know I'm saying I love these little party. Girl, me sensation together.

08:50 Opposites attracts, I think about

08:56 When somebody is totally different from you, they compliment you. What you don't what you like, and she gay men and that's a balance but I mean it can be what it means. I don't know. Two people are going to have to meet halfway and you can't just absorbed with that person. Got they got to come halfway to mediate medium, you know, mean and I sent money to spend on what type of apis you talk about. Now, you know, if I'm bad at handling money bills. Plus, you know, what? You too much of a wild side stuff and you know,

09:38 These guys are hard to catch up sometime.

09:48 Yeah, and you honestly right now on the other hand like I can be a social social. I'm very social sociable and you're not, but, you know, sometimes, you know, that still compliment as, you know, sometime you have to

10:10 Go where she want to go and she needs to go where you coming.

10:16 You don't think so. I mean it to a certain extent. Yeah, but I mean, some people, if you don't like something and you know, that person like that, forcing them to do it as it's not going to be no help relationship. I'm not. So if you let it go everywhere. Just just to be so sure it goes to the party then I got to go. And so they say is everybody going at least go somewhere with that person? Every once in a while. He'll call someone a mean. I mean because one of the things you know a person

11:02 Go to different events.

11:06 And you don't want to go at least try at least to go, probably to one just to to keep the harmony within the relationship because they feel bad when he don't want. Never go nowhere with me. So I wonder what that person's feelings friends. Might be telling them that the heart of thorns getting people head because the person already know I'm not going and when you don't hear it again to you guys to get to the event and everybody saying all that stuff and it makes you think of what use are you going to event?

11:45 It's a venue. Nobody, your friends are going to be there anyway.

11:50 Or something, you know, what couples they do have different. They have a different friends that relationship. Get along with all the other people in your friends, and you don't have nothing coming.

12:09 All right, you don't have nothing in common, but ever, I think everybody have a common ground within something that everybody liked but I know you were looking. So for instance, you know.

12:27 Sports.

12:30 Sports, you know.

12:33 Most women, you know that will probably back in the day. Women didn't like sports, especially football.

12:41 But he coming into two in today's culture and Society you find that you have a lot of women like sports more than men. So what's your take on that time? I mean, with all this social media. Do you know, everybody is supposed to a whole lot of different things that never was supposed to be so glad when we do get into sports more. I mean, you don't like sports and their women. Like I'm in a relationship with me. Something that will call the problem. The new year. Did you watch it? You don't mow, so I'm going to have more than one TV Zoe, you know.

13:28 She ain't going to sit and watch, you know, when they used to like like to wipe watch chick flicks. But now I have a good portion. He likes to watch sports again, gravity to sports more than me and can grab those chick flicks. I bet you that don't speak for me. I just can't get into it. First of all, predictable.

13:58 You know, exactly what's going to happen.

14:01 Sometimes strange story.

14:06 I don't think so. Life experience is a of what people go through in in daily life recognize the moral to the story, but you already knew it. He's not teaching you nothing. You just, you know, you already figured out that I'm a chick flick, but I do like sports to, though, fantasy football, but you know,

14:45 I like the account. They had you in in basketball.

14:50 I mean, I'll watch it. You know, you had the women basketball, the women MBA. Do you have the NBA?

14:59 I just think I just can't get into it. But I think you watched WNBA.

15:10 Nothing, you know that they play fundamental basketball. All that jumping and donkey and all that. They ask you play fundamental basketball.

15:20 Play real ball football to watch anyway.

15:28 Yeah, I know.

15:31 Play a sport in baseball.

15:38 The baseball thing is, so boring to watch to me. Anyway, longbows home runs.

15:54 Double plays. It's an exciting thing that happened.

15:58 I can remember going to a baseball game in Florida. Nicely both of us with a say, watch the game, but the entertainment within the, that they gave during the game, I enjoyed that either, but

16:24 He know it was as first time going. So it was the first time experience.

16:35 Good morning, Woody window song with awesome.

16:45 One person that I want to ask you is what is your first memory of me?

16:51 First member of you.

16:55 Me member, I met you, I know that. But what was what was

17:03 So is your thought?

17:06 I want to, what is you what it look like talking to this guy, over the intercom?

17:14 Yeah, for me, that's a long time ago.

17:20 You are like 30 years ago.

17:24 Talk to you about the speaker Wells, Fargo truck.

17:28 It was kind of at first, I was scared, you know, your face.

17:43 But it turned out to be a good relationship. So,

17:51 Eventually, eventually we found out that your friends already knew me, so

18:01 Yeah, I went to school together. We all went to school with the same school.

18:07 What your friends say when you when you tell it what you told your friend? I didn't know. It was me.

18:15 The name of the new or they saw me.

18:18 They said that I said the name and they knew your name and then once they saw you, they knew that it with you.

18:32 I know right now you would have knew.

18:35 Well, I'm going to Banquets is pretty small by then. So.

18:40 It was.

18:45 But my first memory of you was

18:52 I guess more than my most deepest memory of you was when I had surgery.

19:00 And he was there with me the whole time so I can ask for nothing better cuz you have stuck by my side through thick and thin.

19:18 Women always got better memories. Don't do black guys, don't have memories.

19:39 Real Talk of the version. You doing good right now?

19:48 I don't understand it.

19:51 And you screw up like that, you know.

19:54 And you grew up differently.

19:57 Wake me up in about growing up. So, you know, I grew up with your sister and you grew up with both sisters and a brother.

20:17 If I had like, seven people in the house keys and house at one time.

20:22 What's a lot of children where they live?

20:28 I was the oldest but it was, it's like 10 years between me and my sister and numb.

20:37 And it felt like me being alone, you know.

20:41 You know, with me and my sister not being so close to the age. You know, it's felt like I was only child, why was only child spoiled for a while? And then when she came, you know?

20:56 Like you could share your thoughts or some of your you can go tell talk to your your siblings about things that we're going on in your life. But with me, I had nobody to talk to.

21:12 What's up. You? You sometimes you have to be when I was still can't talk to him so he can might work. But if you figure out stuff for yourself, so if you can tell you what to do, you need a baby get told what to do, and you ain't, it doesn't nothing.

21:27 Do you get a certain age and, you know, until you know, so I had to figure it out myself.

21:41 But I can say that as as we got older and got grown, you know, when my Nemesis, I have a better relationship.

21:52 Because you know, when I was growing up it was like I was taking care of her.

21:57 You know, since it was such a big age difference, bring your clothes.

22:07 No, that's good.

22:12 Yeah.