Andrea Chamblee, Rebecca Chamblee, and Jan Donohoe McNamara

Recorded May 15, 2019 Archived May 15, 2019 39:42 minutes
0:00 / 0:00
Id: mby018766

Description

Andrea (58) Rebecca (18) and Jan (49) remember family member John, who died in a mass shooting attack on the Capital Gazette headquarters in 2018.

Subject Log / Time Code

AC talks about her husband John and how they met.
They talk about about the day of the mass shooting at the Capital Gazette, where John worked.
AC about finding out her husband was shot dead in the shooting.
AC tells about how the last 10 months have been since the mass shooting.
They share how John would like to be remembered.

Participants

  • Andrea Chamblee
  • Rebecca Chamblee
  • Jan Donohoe McNamara

Recording Locations

Veterans Plaza

Venue / Recording Kit


Transcript

StoryCorps uses Google Cloud Speech-to-Text and Natural Language API to provide machine-generated transcripts. Transcripts have not been checked for accuracy and may contain errors. Learn more about our FAQs through our Help Center or do not hesitate to get in touch with us if you have any questions.

00:04 Hey, I'm Rebecca. I'm 20 years old. Today's date is May 15th, 2019. We are in Silver Spring Maryland, and I am here with my aunt and family friend and our here to talk about my uncle.

00:21 Andrea Chamblee, I'm 58 years old today is May 15th 2019. I'm in Silver Spring Maryland. I'm here with my niece Rebecca Chamblee and my sister-in-law Jim McNamara.

00:36 I'm Jan Donohoe McNamara. I'm 49 years old today is May 15th 2019. Where in Silver Spring Maryland? I'm here with my sister-in-law Andrea Chamblee and her niece Rebecca Chamblee.

00:50 Ball family

00:54 So I thought I would start just by asking do you remember how you met John? Of course? Give me my voice. Just too tired to catch up all the phone. I'm sorry.

01:19 Or something. Why don't you tell me how you like, but why don't I start with Rebecca Rebecca John John's my uncle so he's been around for all of my life for as long as I can. Remember. I don't necessarily remember meeting him one time but he's always so he's been there for me.

01:45 So I'm at John. I'm married to his sorry.

01:51 I'm so sorry. I'm married to one of John's younger brother. So I met John while I was meeting the entire family and trying to impress my boyfriend's family members. So John was a big presents during that time when I was very unsure and very new to all of the family Dynamics in

02:18 And he was very always very welcoming and always a lot of fun.

02:22 I remember meeting the family as the sister-in-law to be your daughter-in-law to be and it's a big family. So it's a little imposing.

02:33 Not for your first time meeting him. I was in journalism school and we had a class together and I was kind of a goody-two-shoes. I would arrive early and sit in the front row and he was working for the sports section of the daily student newspaper and he would slide in after it started and sit in the back. So I only noticed him as somebody who wasn't there on time. But time we went out separately after a football game and he came up to me and told me that he thought I was doing really well in class and and I was flattered and I remember how he made me feel

03:18 And when did you start dating?

03:22 I was dating somebody else at the time and he was kind of persistent about us dating and I held him off for about a year.

03:35 I'm going out a few times as friends and I was I was hit on the head. Basically. I I just fell for him and we started dating exclusively about a year later maybe a little less.

03:56 Do college sweethearts College sweethearts?

04:01 Yeah.

04:03 As you said earlier, it's a big family and and coming into such a large family as a girlfriend and then later Beyonce and wife. It is very intimidating and you and John both were always very welcoming and you had been through that Gauntlet already. So I really appreciated seeing the the the grace with what you did it and the commitment and love that you and John always just one of them thanks. It never occurred to me that it was graceful from the outside.

04:33 I was trying to think of what

04:38 What experience I had with him that made me break up with my boyfriend and watching John play sports watching him play basketball. He was really focused and determined and he was often one of the best guys on the court. Even when he played college players around here or the there's really good high school ball, and he played these college prospects. He still he held his own and held them to fewer points than they usually got against the other opponents and he was happy about that. But when he was really joyful was when he was playing softball in the summer with his friends that wasn't competitive at all. They would just throw the ball around and crack jokes and and let little kids get on base and they just had a good time.

05:28 He loves sports so much and as someone who knew knew nothing and still knows nothing about sports the incredible encyclopedic knowledge he brought to it and he'd love to play it. He loved think about it. He loved to watch sports just everything about it. Just lit him up so much and so many things in his life, he could tie back to well that was the year of the championship game of and then many words would happen that I didn't really understand but he would talk about sports and talk about the victories and the great plays of athletes and coaches that he admired the way other people talked about the best Christmas present ever got a so it drew you and even if when you didn't really even understand what he was talking about for sale, which I often didn't but you couldn't help but get drawn into how much he loved it how much he knew about it how much he lived it and wanted to share it and I'm sure that's why he was such a popular writer because everybody who read his work could share in that.

06:27 And I know for me like growing up. I played a lot of sports basketball soccer. And if you would come to my games and cheer me on who to have like advice and and he always had good things to say we would go to like Maryland basketball games all together as a family and I just remember that being like a really big highlight of like being able to have like all of us together there.

06:53 You always seem to know about sports you hear that Title Nine generation, which which I'm not and I don't know if he ever had to explain any sports to you because you seemed to be on top of that on your own here in this is this is how they run the player. I remember like at baseball games and stuff cuz I never really played baseball like he was able to explain that really well in a way that like I could understand and I got more fulfillment out of the game cuz sometimes watching a baseball game there's a lot of like down time and he would be able to LifePoint stuff out to me and be like, I like you should watch this like you should watch the third baseman. You should watch the first baseman and like for their cues. Yeah. I thought so too one of my favorite pictures of my younger daughter and it's actually one of her favorite pictures now to she's about three years old and she's looking through

07:53 Through her fingers like she can't quite watch it wasn't what it was. You was watching the football game and John is in the in the picture talking to her and what he's telling her it is he's explaining that that even though these men are crashing into each other and falling and hitting that it's okay and their patent is going to be alright because we were not a big watching of sports family. And so this had to explain to her once she understood that it was all great and she loved the cheering so she loved to sit in here with John and you should watch for his keys about when you were supposed to be here cuz he wasn't quite sure when that would be but he always knew and then she started to insist on watching. What was it the football guys? What did she call them? The football Mendes falling football men?

08:41 And John could explain all of the reasons why that was important or why that they fell or they didn't fall, but she really just like the falling and she like the Cherry.

08:53 I also remember him like I always think of him as being like a very funny guy. He always had jokes to tell and whether it was jokes like at sports nachos or just just like all of us family hanging out together. I think definitely when you and John would come to the house. That's when the party would start a movie scene or concert or song is on the radio or what happened when he was playing softball with the taxi drivers or something new. He learned about local history because he loved this area so much this town and knew so much about I thought he always had something great and interesting to tell you and he would tell you in a really entertaining and engaging way.

09:36 When you say that, he made jokes every time I hit up by refrigerator for the for the ice, I can remember him saying don't get the cube guys. The crushed ice is much better. And now everytime I get ice. I think I have to get the crushed ice because that cute guys is just not as good.

10:01 Well

10:03 Why don't we go to the June 28th and talk about that day. Do you guys remember how it started out for me? I wasn't with you guys, but it started out totally normal day. I was at camp and had no idea what was going on until I got home.

10:24 But yeah, we were all in three different places. I think I was at I was not in my regular work building for some reason and I can't figure out why for my calendar. I was at the main building when I took a lunchtime yoga class and then I got my computer to sit outside to finish working that day because it was a beautiful day. It was just

10:48 Perfect temperature in the sun was out and well while I was in yoga class people were texting me and emailing me asking me if I knew where John was.

11:01 It was a beautiful day. And I think that's what I remember. The most is that I was so normal and so beautiful and I was at my office and we had been away the previous week. So I was at my office and I was trying to catch up on everything cuz I've been away and so I had my phone off and I hadn't looked at in a while and I was trying to to get through stuff and it was Thursday. So I was happy that the the the week was finishing up and I was getting to the backlog and then I looked at my phone and I remember that the headlines pacifically said the Capital Gazette and so I instantly gasped and already by then end up in a couple of hours and there was a mass shooting at the Capital Gazette.

11:44 I closed up my laptop and I ran back to the gym where I put my stuff in the locker and they had a wide screen TV in front of the gym and I just sat down where I was and looked at that people lining up out of the building, you know, the police want you to come out with your hands over your head and I was looking at those people with their hands over their head to see if any of them had this bright blue shirt on that John were that morning.

12:12 And I couldn't tell.

12:17 So hum the people at the gym the teachers there.

12:24 I'm pulled out my emergency file and called Rebecca's dad my brother Jeff to come pick me up and he was working just a couple miles away.

12:36 So he came to pick me up once I saw the headline and you know, since the headline specifically mention the Capital Gazette, especially I called my husband and he tried to text you and he tried to text John but haven't gotten any response and we decided that he needed to go see their mother who lives in a retirement home just a short drive from us, so I came home and he just left and so of course our daughters who are 9 and 11 at the time instantly knew that something was wrong because I was home early and they saw the look on my face and the look on his face and and and he just left so we had a long night ahead of us and I explained that there had been a shooting and that I had been at John's office and I for a moment I hesitated at first I thought maybe I'll just say it was in Annapolis and then I thought I better tell them the truth. I think already had it been long enough that already the concern was growing in my mind that if I hadn't heard anything quickly that it may not be good news and

13:36 It was going to be quite a while before we had the official words. Yeah, I was following Twitter. Somebody said there was some information on Twitter watching.

13:49 One of the TV stations but not CNN which interviewed someone who had escaped and she dropped John's name is somebody who didn't make it out, but I didn't know about that. I was watching a different Channel and but the

14:09 The journalist started calling my Good Morning America called couple of newspapers from New York City the New York Post called and I don't even remember who I was. I remember when I counted the calls. It was 13 calls and none of them would tell me why they chose me to call.

14:29 We weren't following the news terribly carefully because the kids were there and John's youngest sister and her husband and their three-year-old came over everybody kind of instinctively wanted to be together. So since we have the kids there we were trying to focus on that while sort of of course looking at our phones here and there but the information was very sketchy and it was very it was very sketchy and nobody really knew and I was when I really didn't want to burden the kids anymore, then they were the one they would ask me because they're old enough to ask and to nothing of they went away obviously, but three year old is not I would say cuz I had read in the Associated Press 170 people had gotten out of the building as a whole and that five people had not that that what that's what we knew and I said until we know anyting else. We're just going to hold on to the fact that a lot of people escaped.

15:29 And my older one said but does that mean he's okay, and I said, I don't know and I'm just going to hope for the I'm going to hope that the numbers are are on our side which course meant it was going to not be on someone else's side. That's not a comfortable place to be certain way. But I said that's what we know and that's all and that's all I can hold onto right now. So that's what we're going to do and I

15:56 And what sort of just kind of come back to that and that we're just going to hold on to help.

16:03 That was such a painful time and we were in three different places and I didn't want to ask you guys where you are till now. I was at Camp all day and it was like a beautiful day all day outside. I'm just like you guys said and I just had no idea what was going on. I got out of work around 4. I hadn't checked my phone or anything because I just don't think that's appropriate while I'm while I'm there as a counselor for the kids and so I got home and that night was camp out night. So we were supposed to stay overnight we go home get dinner and then you come back set up tents and the kids stay overnight and the camp is so close to my house that I can just walk to it. But we all go out all of us together to all the counselors to go get food and had dinner and stuff. So I got home and I called my mom and I was like, can I have the car?

17:03 Music please don't start with me right now. Like we don't need to get into this and I was like as a guy like I I need the car and she was like, you know because right now there's other stuff going on. There is much bigger stuff going on. That's when she told me that my dad has gone to meet you at work and that there had been a shooting in Annapolis and we weren't sure if John was okay.

17:35 And that there had been reports and people were coming out but we haven't seen him yet and she was really good about trying to help me keep my spirits up I guess so she looks like she's like don't panic just like go through everything like normal. But like I need you to know that this is what's going on in like this could really be a big deal and we're not short right now.

18:03 That was that was how I found out then I went to my mom's house which was close to your camp and close to your dad and I argue and I was at your dad's house waiting on the patio.

18:18 Scrolling through Twitter over trying to overhear the news.

18:24 And it was about 10 at night, which was it about eight hours. Later.

18:29 That I got a call from one of the reporters.

18:33 Who was out to lunch when it went when they went out?

18:39 Cuz it happened about 1:30 in the reporter stagger their lunch so they can.

18:47 Cover the phones so he had a late lunch.

18:51 And he came back to the shooting and

18:55 So he called me at about 10.

18:59 And he was trying really hard not to cry and I was hoping okay bulge on left his phone behind and he's borrowing the strange phone of his friend and know but it was his friend.

19:12 And yes, if anybody called me out and I said no.

19:16 And he said he thought that was horrible and they've known for hours and he found my number and he wanted me to know that many just said that he's dead and he started crying.

19:30 And I remember apologizing to him.

19:34 I said something like I'm so sorry you had such an awful day.

19:40 And

19:42 And he said yes, it was the worst day of my life. He felt so guilty for being the lucky one to have a late lunch.

19:52 So I asked him if he was okay. I don't think I cried till I hung up just cuz I didn't want him to feel punished for calling me.

20:04 And I'm and so we hung up and then I don't know about five minutes later. We had just gotten a new ring doorbell and the crisis response team was at my door back home about a 40-minute drive away.

20:20 And I

20:22 I asked him if they could talk to me through the doorbell and they said no they wanted to talk to me on the phone if I wasn't there so I called their phone and that's when I got the official notice. It was about a few minutes after.

20:37 Bill Head hung up Italian me

20:41 And then I got a call so you then could I call you when you called? I don't remember her and then he called me and by this time and about an hour or I think before you had gotten the official notice Anderson Cooper apparently said John's name and I know that because that's when people started calling you no other sisters and cousin Colin. Could you hear did you hear but it was not confirmed but just that people are now saying as you say that people were reporting that that John had been among the fatalities and what did we know and what we had we heard and of course we didn't end and nobody really wanted to call their mom rightly so until until we had something to say and even then I can play with the girls until we know until we know something. We're just going to try and hold on to

21:34 To whatever we can.

21:36 But then when I got the call, you know that that you had had gotten officially notified. I had been hoping at that point. It was late. I could get you know, I could get the kids to bed. But of course, you know, they overheard and and I had to tell them and you know, John's younger sister and her family went home cuz the three-year-old really needs to go to bed by then, but then I was left with the you know, the 9 in the 11 year old with a lot of questions and they were and who absolutely were not going to go to bed until their dad got home cuz they needed to see that he was safe.

22:11 And so we went out into the backyard. It was a beautiful night. It was such a lovely night and they were up so much later than they normally are. So in the summer in our backyard and the bamboo that's back there fireflies or just a few nights in the summer and they twinkle like their Christmas lights and the girls have never seen that because they're always in bed before this would happen. So right out there in the darkness waiting for their dad to come home after all that happened and my older girl says, I hope the fireflies aren't celebrating. They shouldn't be happy.

22:43 Cuz they couldn't reconcile that the night could be so beautiful when something so ugly had happened.

22:50 And then their dad got home and the younger are younger daughter wanted to sleep all together. So no one sleep by yourself. So we've got all the all of the stuffed animals and all of the blankets and all the pillows and everything. We piled everything into the living room and all four of us went to sleep in that room. And I knew that we would then see John's face on the news and in one of those lineups because we've all seen this so often when these things happen,

23:23 I am

23:25 So that night I finally convinced my mom to let me borrow the car and go out to the mall with my co-workers. And so I did when we were eating dinner and someone brought up like have you heard about the shooting like isn't that crazy? It's so close to us. And I just kind of remember like knowing that there was like this possibility that John was there that he was one of the victims but I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want to like say it and then make it be real. So I just kind of like didn't really say anything and I got a ride with one of my co-workers back to to the campsite and we started like setting up our tents and everything and we got through the night and then

24:11 Around 10 p.m. I got a text from my mom. That was like it's official. The news reports of said John is one of the victims.

24:21 And I remember just like looking up and my boss was sitting right next to me and I was like, oh my God.

24:29 My my uncle is one of the victims in the shooting and she was kind of taken aback and she's like what lake do you are you? Okay like you need to go home right now? Like I said is everything. Okay, and I'm like, I think I'm fine and she was like, okay. Well leg. Feel free. If you need to like take a break right now. Like we have enough staff to cover this like you can go take a walk. So I walked away from the camp site and I started going towards the bathrooms. And as I was walking their tears started falling from my face, but as I as I reach the bathroom, there are a few kids coming out and I didn't want them to see the pain that I was feeling in that moment. So I had to kind of like the second back in and put on a smile for them because I don't want them to think that anything was wrong, especially the younger kids her like five or six like a lot of them. It's their first night away from their parents and I didn't want them till I get scared.

25:24 I seeing seeing me so distraught but I remember later that night. I kind of I kind of pulled it together and went back to the campsite and there are three little girls are all about 6 years old and they couldn't sleep because it was their first night going to bed without their parents there. And so they're like can we can we stay up with you come and sit with you and I was like, yeah, so we were sitting on the fireplace but I was sitting with my legs crossed one girl on each knee and a third girl in the middle of there's a kind of like hugging them and some of them are crying because they were scared and I knew that I couldn't let them see me cry, but I just kind of started having these like silent tears stream down my face and I didn't I don't want them to think anything was wrong and make them feel more scared. But it was It was kind of comforting having them cuz it felt like like when you're little and you have like Teddy Bears or something like wrapped up in your arms.

26:24 So that that kind of made it better but it was it was hard cuz cuz I didn't want anyone to to see how much it was hurting and then my my boss told her head boss my boss told told on her supervisor who's who's above her and the next morning he came up to me and she was like we heard about your situation and I was supposed to work the next day the full day after so we have we have the camp out and then like two counselors will then work the full day the next day, but the rest of the counselors get to go home.

27:13 And here is like a are you sure you want to work today? I think it's best that you go home and you you're with your family and I was like, okay. Yeah, I think that maybe I should like take the day off if you guys already have someone there but part of me felt weird because I didn't want anything to change or be different. Like I said that to my boss. He was like a few if you need anything we're here for you and I was like, no like I I need this to be the part of my life that stable and stays the same when everything else isn't but I I was granted that day off and around 10 or 11 a.m. I walk from the campsite back home and I saw

27:57 Andrea at your car in the parking lot in Grandma's car in the parking lot. And in that second like I knew oh my God. I need to be here with my family. I need to be here with them.

28:09 I think I slept at your house that night but I don't remember. I remember I had about two hours of sleep, but the most

28:17 It was it was a really long night and I just remember that when we did get up that next day. Then it just having strangely had that conscious thought of it'll be in the paper. They'll be one of those collection of photographs that that happened after a mass shooting cuz we've all been through this before as a as a society and there it was and then the phone just started to go crazy just the paintings and brings a people calling and that people love John so much and they were so shocked and everyone's trying to understand.

28:50 What had happened and it was so inconceivable that that he could be gone and it hasn't happened in you know on it now in Annapolis that beautiful city on such a lovely day, especially some housing to make it that much more unbelievable.

29:08 Yeah, I tell people that Annapolis is a town where men wear salmon-colored shorts with impunity.

29:16 Antarctic shoes and don't lock their boats tonight.

29:22 And it happened there. It's very hard for people to take in those headlines and apply them. If you want people that they know I still can't right now. I'm sure I know that I've told you that one of the most extreme reactions I got was the next day from my next door neighbor because she had seen the news of course and hadn't thought about it other than another terrible story. So when I came out on that morning, and she just asked me how things were and I told her she

29:59 Really broke down herself with that dual impact of realizing that it was her next-door neighbor's family that this happened to and how surreal that felt and also she kept saying I never thought about it if she knows our last name, but it never occurred to her that this could be something that happened to someone she knew someone in her own world, and I think that's very difficult for life people.

30:28 Is there anything that's happened since then? It's been 10 months that stands out.

30:35 Either one of you

30:37 I think in a way that but you're just sort of

30:40 People really having a hard time believing that that is real that that this is something that's happened to a nephew and that and that life has to go on and you have done that was so much commitment and compassion, which I know you don't like hearing, but but it really is true how much you have your your love and your commitment to John. I just continue to shine through and all that you've done. Thank you.

31:08 For me, I remember like I didn't really want to tell like all my friends. But like I knew that I had to I go to school in New York. So a lot of them are here in Maryland over the summer. So I sent out like a text to my friends and I was like Hey, I just need you guys to know that like this is this is what's going on my family right now because I don't want it to be a surprise like when I come back, like I said, I'd need to know that this is something that's happened. And I think that like that's kind of been something that I've tried to reiterate is that it's not just a single case like these things are happening every single day now and at some point like it's everyone's going to know someone and that's scary that's terrifying. It really isn't so many and so many of these types of vets don't make the headlines so

32:05 Yeah, there's a lot more suffering out there. Then a lot of people are trying really hard to make sure you don't forget their son who was killed.

32:16 Or their child who is killed or their daughter whose partner killed her. I have a mixed blessing that the journalist, you know, John are going to keep telling this story that it's so it is exhausting.

32:33 To always be representing somebody that you want to represent with dignity.

32:41 I think what I remember is two sides of the coin I remember.

32:47 Jan how you stepped up and Rebecca you've been so supportive and I posted a couple pictures of the pile of mail that I couldn't get to my house that was filling up myself and in a couple of days 18 people showed up at my house to sort my mail and pay my bills and they put them in file folders and label the folders.

33:10 And now I have three boxes in my house, but at least I can sit down on my sofa.

33:16 So that's kind of heartwarming that people really want to contribute and help and I've been getting a lot of support and I can't be more thankful to like my friends and my family for your like I feel like we've all come together really well through this time and my friends have also been there for me and really supportive which is amazing. And like I just hope that anyone can also have that support system. But like like you guys have said it's it's not enough when we hear about these things to just want to memorialize the person like we want action to be to have gotten three flags and several plaques and I want to throw them back and say,

34:03 Vote especially the politicians. That's the other side of that coin the politicians that are so self-serving and so dismissive and lying outright lime.

34:19 About their opposition to the laws that would make this happen less often. They

34:26 The NRA had me on the front page one day and even they said that the law that I was lobbying for didn't really have anything wrong with it. It was just another step in gun hatred but but they don't need to say anything more because they're there stink of fans will say we're going to come for your guns and confiscate them and throw gun owners in jail and and to hear grown-ups make these crazy lies about the laws that would make this maybe not happen to one family. But that's the other side of the coin. I just don't understand how they can know their constituents are dropping dead and they wont do anything to help the phrase. We've all heard too much since this has happened is I'm sorry for your loss butt and the butt precedes the

35:21 Really Hollow arguments against the kind of Common Sense changes that are completely compatible with the second amendment that will keep people safe like background checks, which even a majority of NRA members support.

35:34 So we need to fortunately keep

35:38 John's name out there and all the the faces and names of the people that lost this way so that people remember that they're real and that that real change has to happen to keep this number from growing cuz you know, this club is too large and we don't want any more members. That was one of the first things I heard was welcome to the club.

35:59 It's a big club. I'm very grateful for the many supportive and wonderful people that we've met since then because there are some wonderful people out there who are trying to support other victims and survivors and make some change and so many of them haven't had this happen to them yet and they're still fighting everyday. They didn't they're not going to wait for it to happen to them and I'm very grateful for them again. We would love to close the membership down.

36:30 How you think John would like to be remembered?

36:39 John told me how he wanted to be remembered. He wanted to be remembered as a sports writer the newspaper. He worked on a couple of years ago. I moved them up Sports because they needed somebody who could do more things at the news desk and he was despondent. He was working on a book for 13 years and he was almost finished and he said he's going to buy a sports bike from someone who's not a sports writer.

37:07 And I'm happy to say I finish this book and we got a scholarship in his name. So damn it. He's going to be remembered as a sports writer.

37:17 Absolutely, and I know you've shared with me and I heard him say how much he want to get back to Sports in those years. And even though he was covering a beat that didn't have his passion away sports that he still did that job magnificently everyday so many people talked about that about how much of commitment but he was always a good journalist, but I'm so glad that you finished his book and I'm so

37:43 Grateful that that it will be out there because it's his it's so much will be his story about the the bat about basketball the sport. He loved the area he loved and how it shaped this town and how it shaped our entire community and I know that he is so grateful to you for all that you've been able to do.

38:05 I am to there anything you want to remember or you want people to know I remember at the end of pilot my College semester last year. I was telling him that I was taking this journalism class and I say that I wasn't really sure how I felt about the final because we had to write our own beat and I said that I felt like I was kind of rushing through it and didn't have my sources all over like I wasn't really happy with exactly how it was going to turn out and he gave me some good advice and he was like,

38:40 He told me that you thought that I was a good Storyteller which meant a lot to me coming from from him and like all of his experience and and he said like sometimes that just happens when when you're working on a story you collect as much as you can and you have to get it in by the deadline and sometimes you're not always happy with the result. Just got to keep pushing through.

39:07 I will keep pushing through.

39:10 I have a temporary tattoo that says keep going but it wore off today and I don't have another one. I didn't order enough, but I would look down on that and remember that I had to keep going and now that I don't have it anymore. I was wondering does that mean I can stop?

39:26 But I guess not.

39:30 I have the Warrior One Night.

39:33 You are and I know that.

39:36 Thank you everybody. Thank you.