Elizabeth "Reed" Stewart and Anna Kampfe

Recorded September 4, 2014 Archived September 4, 2014 47:49 minutes
0:00 / 0:00
Id: atd001232

Description

Anna Kampfe (17) talks with her friend Reed Stewart (16) about their diagnoses of Type I Diabetes, how they deal with it, and whether they would still want to have diabetes if a cure were available.

Subject Log / Time Code

Anna (A) and Reed (R) each tell the story of the day they were diagnosed with Type I Diabetes.
A says it was difficult to transition back to school after being hospitalized.
A and R describe the smell of insulin, and talk about the challenges of being responsible for their own care.
R says she often had to remember, "God doesn't give us what we can't handle."
They remember meeting one another and bonding over having diabetes.
R says she feels very supported by Holy Innocents Episcopal School being the top fund-raising school for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation each year.
They talk about feeling frustrated when non-diabetics try to give them instructions about handling their disease.
R says that even if she could NOT have diabetes, she is so grateful for everything it has taught her, that she would not make a change. A would still choose to "get rid of it."

Participants

  • Elizabeth "Reed" Stewart
  • Anna Kampfe

Recording Locations

Holy Innocents Episcopal School

Venue / Recording Kit

Partnership Type

Fee for Service

Transcript

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00:04 Hi, my name is Anna kampfe. I am 17 years old. Today is September 4th 2014. Currently we are at Alumni Hall at Holy Innocents episcopal school and I am speaking today with one of my best friends read Stewart.

00:21 My name is Rod Stewart. I am 16 years old. It is September 4th 2014 and we are at Holy Innocents Episcopal School at Alumni Hall and I am having a conversation with one of my best friends Anna kampfe.

00:37 So I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes or other Lee known as juvenile diabetes when I was 9 years old. It was actually was in September. So I'm coming up on my anniversary of diagnosis, but I wasn't your typical case diabetes. I was I was diagnosed really late in the game. I remember I was sick for a pretty long time before they diagnosed me. I all the sudden got really thirsty all the time and I would drink gallons of water during the day and it was it was ridiculous. Cuz I mean, I'm a short person now, but imagine me is like a fourth grader. I was Tiny. So it was weird that I was drinking all this water all the time. And so I was drinking lots of water and I was tired all the time. I eat I wasn't sleeping well and then all the sudden it just all change like my

01:37 I knew I wasn't getting food correctly. And so my body's reaction to that was well, we need to stop you need to stop production immediately. So I remember the next two weeks for the complete opposite. I was still not sleeping well, but I was sleeping all the time just not very well, but I stop eating completely I couldn't eat anything and I remember I lost 12 lb in one week, which is a lot for a small child.

02:03 And I went to my pediatrician and she just she's delivered me when I was a baby. So she she's knowing my whole life and she looked at my mom and she said Joe.

02:17 I think this kid has Type 1 diabetes. Remember my mom cried. I had no idea what she was talking about. I seen a commercial about juvenile diabetes with Paula Abdul talking about it. I remember that cuz I loved American Idol. I had no idea what it was. I was really confused. It took them forever to admit me into the hospital. But as soon as they could I was rushed in your and everything and I remember sleeping the whole first day and then waking up and they're like, hey, so you have type 1 diabetes your blood sugar was over.

02:56 I think it was over like 600 maybe and

03:01 They told me that and I was like, okay. Well, alright, so when am I going home and they said you're not going home for a while. How long is The Wild how you're not going over a couple days. It's okay. Well however long it takes to fix it. And I remember the doctor and my dad showing this look and they said we can't fix this this isn't going away. And you know, I didn't know then but really diabetes is organ failure mean your pancreas just kind of gives up on you, you know, so that it was It was kind of that Pinnacle moment of this is my life now, it's changed forever and I just I can't can't forget that day. But what was your first day like

03:46 My as I would a bicycle at my diet birthday is February 24th, and I've been died. I was diagnosed when I was 10 years old. So only 1 year older than you are and the same as you months before I was diagnosed. I started feeling sick. I was drinking so much water. I was sleeping all the time. I'd go to the bathroom all the time and I just didn't feel well and teachers in class. I was just this lazy kid who fell asleep in the middle of class always use an excuse to go get water or go to the bathroom to leave class and no knew it was wrong every was concerned but there was no explanation yet and this went on for months and months. We didn't catch it for a really long time. And eventually we went to my pediatrician and we went we told them are symptoms. We told them what was wrong and how long it been going on and my doctor actually happened to be a type 1 diabetic and he did

04:46 Type 1 diabetic his entire life and he said I am going to test your blood sugar cuz I'm actually type 1 diabetic. So here's my meter going to prick your finger and we'll see what it is. I do idea what he was doing. All I knew was that she was freaking my finger with a needle and blood was coming out and he checked it and it was almost 900 and blood sugars for those of you who don't know should be at 100. So that was really bad. And when we heard that me being a 10 year old child who is sick wasn't really paying attention very much. But my mom was in as soon as she heard that she started sobbing. She did not know what to do. She knew her child was sick. She knew that she was really sick and that we had to go to the hospital and she immediately call my dad my sister and my brother who are the middle school and we drove to the hospital and like you I slept for a day before I actually woke up. I woke up and they told me what happened and

05:45 I immediately thought I'm going to die. That's not what happened. But me being a small child assumes that every disease meant I was going to die and they told me no, you're just sick. It's okay and like you I just assumed I won't I'll get better so blow up or am I just have a cold or something and they told me that this isn't going away. Now. I will have to live with us until they find which they haven't yet. And so we had to go through training which I was pretty bummed about because being a 4th grader you we got excited when you got to miss school, even if it was for terrible reason and then I found out I had to go back to school to learn about diabetes and I learned about this whole new disease that I never really known about ever and I learned all these things and I realized wow, this is going to be different. I'm going to have to give insulin for everything. I eat all day check my blood sugar. Like I had to do at the pediatrician before I went here and learn how

06:45 I count carbs and I figured out that I'm going to have to adjust my life to this and it just it was really scary scary for me and it's scary for my parents and scary for my siblings and scary for my teachers and classmates who when I came back to school they were so concerned and it was just one of the scariest days of my life and my parents life. I feel like yeah, I remember sort of I didn't get upset until the first week. I was home. I stayed away from school for about a week cuz I just needed to calm down and figure out what was going on and plus my parents, you know, they wanted to figure out how this is going to work. You know, cuz you do you have to check your blood sugar.

07:31 Ranging from like 6 to 10 times a day and when you're first diagnosed it's even more cuz you have to check throughout the night to cuz you're not stable for a while. I mean you go through this thing called the honeymoon phase and you know people's honeymoon phase is Canby from what like a couple months to like couple years were basically your pancreas just it keeps pumping out small doses of insulin. So you're not completely reliant on you know, the fake insulin that people make in Labs, but it really messes you up cuz you take insulin thinking that your pancreas stop working completely and then it pump some more in your blood sugar goes low and you've no idea why it's not your fault. It's just because it's the way your body's decided to work. And so my parents wanted me to stay home for a while to sort of figure that all out. But I remember that first day I got home. I just I laid on the floor. I literally walked in the house walked into our like dents or the living room area. I just lie down on the floor and just cry.

08:31 Cuz I was so confused. I know what was going on. And I mean I had a sweet tooth to I still do I still love sweets but

08:42 It really it really freaks me out. Cuz I mean, you know, I'm living with allergies to and so I already knew how hard that was cuz you know, I'm allergic to peanuts and everything. They aren't they are you don't think that they are but they are and so I was already sure of what that was like and now I had this thing where I really had to pay attention to what I was eating cuz it's you know, now there's math involved. I've never been good at that scared me. I'm terrible at math. So I'm glad I mean, you know what that's like, you know, you have to calculate things you have to have a calculator with you and thank God you have calculators on your phones now. I don't know what I would do. So yeah, it is scary and

09:21 But I think a lot of people what they don't realize it's what it's like being a teenager with diabetes. So, you know, what's what do you think is the difference between being a child and being like, you know where you are now? Yeah like you when I was a child, I was scared of needles. I was terrified of needles in becoming a type 1 diabetic and learning that you had to prick your finger and give shots to give insulin every day. That scared me. So for the first probably month, I would eat only things that did not have carbs. I would eating Meats. I would eat small dosages of Pringles and cheese. So I would I could avoid giving insulin and that is not healthy. I didn't realize that as a child, but that's not healthy. You have to live on carbs carbs give you energy and when I was a child, I didn't understand that. So when my mom tried to tell me that I would go in my room and hide in the Box to avoid giving insulin and then eventually I learned, you know, you have to just get used to it.

10:21 You have to eat carbs to be healthy and then give insulin for your carbs to be even more healthy. You have to do all of these things and it was especially hard after we were after I was first diagnosed when my mom was the only person who I would like give me shots. I could check my blood sugar right after I got out of the hospital that was easy, but I did not want to give my own shots. So every day at lunch my mom would come to school and help me count my carbs. I would pack my lunch and write with a sharpie all over my food. How many carbs are in this amount of food? And then we go to the nurse she give insulin I'd give her a hug and she's go home and I finish my day and that was that one on for probably a month cuz again, I was terrified of needles as a child. So I did not want to give it to myself and then I finally had the push to give myself a shot for the first time when someone brought Donuts in the class. I remember cuz it was her birthday. She brought in donuts and my mom was in the middle of a meeting.

11:20 My dad could come but I didn't want my dad to give me insulin. I just wanted my mother to and I wanted to do nuts. So badly. I just finally did it myself now, I won't let anyone give me insulin or check my blood sugar. No one can do that but me but so when I was a child it was different because I really relied on my mom to help me and relied on my dad a lot. But now when I'm a teenager when I'm going to go to college soon and I go to high school every day and I'm alone and now I drive I have to be able to take care of myself, which is sometimes hard cuz my Mom and Dad have now learned they still have to remind me sometimes like how's your blood sugars been today? No, do you have ketones that kind of those kind of checkups? But otherwise the responsibility really is on me.

12:08 And I really have to take care of myself. Cuz right now I'm the only one who can keep track of myself to do that. And it's sometimes harder to do that cuz you may be sitting at lunch drinking sweet tea and you just guessed on your cards and it's randomer. Yeah, that's probably right and you give insulin and then it makes your blood sugar is high or low, you know, you have those moments when you realize that's in thr this really is all up to me. Now, I can't rely on my parents to take care of me. I have to figure it out for myself, which was really hard for me when I finally realized that my parents were there to help me anymore cuz I was really reliant on them. That was really the big difference between now and then you said donut smells like yeah. The good day is with everybody Rock cake for their birthday like cake every other day. I know somewhere and everywhere that smell smell smell when you're like pump is malfunctioning.

13:08 You're in like your shot like spilled or something. Yeah, and you smell that insulin smell if you know exactly what it is. Yeah, my sister always said that when I was giving insulin she'd walking to the kitchen. It smells like a hospital in here. It's that clothes smell but

13:27 Yeah, so there's this smell with insulin like I'm not sure how like, how do I describe that? Like it's like this clean sort of like

13:38 It almost smells like plastic to me. Like it smells like a plastic container doubt like Houston alcohol swabs exactly. Like it. It's like this clean but not pleasant smell. Yeah, I mean us we get used to it. So now it's just nothing but if you walk into a room you will be able to smell the insulin use right away the way that my entire family described it as it smells like a hospital cuz it just smells like medicine but it's smells like medicine mixed with alcohol swabs. We had in the area that we give shots are put our pumps. I didn't cuz being sterile. That's also something that you've got to do. I mean, I forget to do it all the time like I you know, there are times where I'm like, oh, I don't need to wash my hands but then I'm like wait do I want an infection know and I hope you know what you're so like you can get an infection so easily I mean, you know,

14:38 Immune system is just it takes a shot from that like, you know, it's it's down for the rest of your life. I mean, I know you get sick all the time. I get sick all the time. All the diabetics get sick all the time. We have that we actually were just talking about this today. It's almost like all the diabetics are in a club together. We have the diabeetus club. Yes this you know, even though it's this kind of horrible disease that it doesn't Rex your life. You have this community of people who just understand so well, that's not to say that people who don't have diabetes don't understand but it's it's one of those things where you can get really close, but you will never really know what it feels like on a day-to-day basis until you have it like you just you won't and I mean, you know my mom that's something that she and I have talked about before she's I mean, she's a great mom and she she does so much for me and she knows so much about diabetes just because

15:38 Care so much, but there were there's been times where I've told her. I'm like Mom don't don't tell me, you know what to eat or you know, how much to bolus. I've got this, you know, like like he said being a teenager, you know, I can't rely on my parents all the time and there have been times where I've been like you don't let me do this on my own because as much as you understand you don't know what this feels like.

16:05 Oh, yes. Yes, I can think of it. I'm sorry. I remember once I read I was exercising and you know is diabetics exercise can be

16:16 Somewhat difficult cuz your blood sugar, you know, you want to get it up before you exercise cuz exercise brings it back down. It's so you know, it's a chemical balance, you know, the carbs go in and exercise helps the energy get converted quicker. So I was exercising and I have a delayed reaction when I exercise I often either go low right after I exercise and then go low again later or I remain pretty constant, but I still go later. I just I always have a delayed reaction and I know that because I've done it so many times but I remember this one time I was exercising and I had a really Delayed Reaction. It was like two or three hours later. I was like probably in the 50s like he knows pretty well down there and

17:07 Talking in a language that since I diabetes if you know what I mean, okay.

17:18 But that was okay.

17:23 Yes.

17:27 Okay, okay.

17:31 Give me to start over. So I was exercising this one time and exercise diabetes is difficult cuz chemically you eat something or you you know, you make sure that your blood sugar stays high and you can do that by, you know, not taking insulin after eating a meal or sub something to delay the insulin making the carbs convert to energy and so I did what I usually do, which is I have a insulin pump which has a vial of insulin in it and I can plug in carbs plug-in times and it will give me dosages based on what my doctor, you know prescribes to me and so my pump I can suspend it which means it won't give me any insulin for a while. And so I suspended it while I went to work out and I work mean I work out for like an hour. I'm free hardcore running on the treadmill, you know.

18:31 And I was working out and I spend my pump and what usually happens with when I workout if I have a delayed reaction, which means my blood sugar will stay constant like it should around the 100 after I exercise and then later on it will drop significantly means it'll go below a hundred and when you go below hundred, you know, you get the shakes and you know, you're you can't talk you lose vision, you know bad stuff happens when your blood sugar goes low. It's not fun and you can you can die from that. It's you know, it's an intense situation. And so that usually happens to me my blood sugar goes low after I workout but not for you know a couple of hours which is what a delayed reaction is and what happens with that and

19:18 So about two hours later two or three hours later. My blood sugar went really low, which is around like 50 and below is dangerous. That's when it starts to get really dangerous and to the point where you could possibly pass out or something and some of us are got low and it was going around fifty and so I said Mama said Mama my blood sugar is low and she says okay, you know go check it. So I did and I know it's like 50 that's you know, not good and she's like, I know so, you know, why don't you go eat like a piece of cheese. I'm making a chicken and you can eat some of that too. And I looked at her I said Mom there there no like carbs or no like sugars in cheese or chicken. That's not going to bring my blood sugar up because you know when you want when your blood sugar is low you want sugar, you know, you want something that'll bring it up and bring it up quickly so you can go about your day and you can also, you know do extra things like you can keep your pump off for you know, not

20:18 Take insulin for the next meal and that'll sort of help regulate it and get it back to equal standards. And so I took a piece of cheese and a good mom. This is not going to help me. This is a piece of cheese. It's like, you know, it's one slice. It's not going to help me, you know, it has no carbs in it. There's really very little sugar in it. It's not going to help me and I remember she got so frustrated with me just like I know what I'm doing, you know, don't question me. I'd it has carbs in it. I'm sure and I'm like no Mom. I'm and I and I looked at her and I said I'm going to go get you know, a granola bar that has a little bit of chocolate in it. Cuz that will bring my blood sugar up that has sugar in it. So I'mma go get one of those and she's like, why are you doing that? You just exercised? Why are you why are you going to get something, you know like that. You don't need all of those carbs and my mom I'm going to go eat this now. I'll see you. I'll see you later for dinner. And I just remember it was one of those moments. Where was like, you know,

21:19 I think my mom realized.

21:22 This is her deal. Now. She is becoming an adult and I have to step back and let her do this. I have to let her be in control of her body now, you know as much as I want to help her she may not want my help sometimes.

21:37 And you know, I think we being more of a teenager and adult you're up you're in that stage of life where you're getting to the point where you can't rely on your parents anymore. I drive now too and it's it's scary. You have to take your blood sugar sometimes before you should every time before you get in the car check your but. It doesn't always happen that way but you should but you know, I can't rely on my parents to constantly be there. I can't call them up in the middle of their day and say hey I forgot. You know, how many carbs you know, how many carbohydrates are in a chicken sandwich? You know, how many how many do you think I should bolus at which means take insulin bolus me to take insulin and you know, they

22:24 He know that usually they would say I and now I think about this. I mean, I never told my dad this but when he makes breakfast cuz my dad's an amazing cook you've eaten. Oh, yeah, he's a good breakfast cooker. He makes you know banana bread and we had pancakes one time but he cooks food and he cooks like banana bread in these things and he tries to make them without as much sugar as possible just for me cuz he's great dad and he he always tells me about what he like, you know around the range of carbs what he just made her in it. And yeah, he says I will I made you know, I'm giving you two pancakes. It's about 30 carbs and I always bolus about 5 or 10 more than he tells me because he's always about 5 or 10 less and your part of me says and it just tell just tell him, you know, every just tell him that he's wrong and then he's always about

23:24 Turn off. I don't want to hurt his pride cuz I know he is so much pride in that about, you know, cooking things specifically for me that have a certain amount, you know, and it's it's an estimation but still, you know, it's always a little off so I always wished for a little extra and I never tell him that but you know, it's it's one of those things where you know, I know I'm in control I have to be in control. Yeah. I feel like that's the same with a lot of type 1 diabetics and they realize that cuz when from 4th grade to probably 6th grade, I didn't know that Holy Innocents was a diabetic Community. I didn't know that there were 10 plus diabetics who went to the school I wasn't aware and so for the first two years, it was really just my family and I figuring this out for ourselves and I would always go by the saying

24:14 That on one of my friends told me that when I was very young that God doesn't give us what we can't handle and I would try and repeat that in my head over and over when something went went wrong when I had a low blood sugar in the middle of the night or when I got sick because I didn't give insulin correctly or something like that and it was so hard to believe that it was hard to think. I obviously can't handle this. So, why did why do I have type 1 why did I get it if I can handle it?

24:45 What I was alone without a diabetic Community just me and my family which my family of course is always supporting me and always trying to understand but like you said no one can ever truly understand what you are going through. It was really hard for me cuz I was the only type 1 diabetic that I knew cuz it was before I met you and it was hard to deal with it on my own and then I remember in sixth grade. I met Anna kampfe big and tall eighth-grader will big and taller than me bigger and taller than her specifically. I'm cuz I'm a short person and I met Anna kampfe and I didn't even know she was a type 1 diabetic until I saw her without her blood sugar meter and check it and then start drinking a juice box and I went up to her and said you're a type 1 diabetic.

25:30 Type 1 diabetic is instant bond. I mean, it doesn't matter who they are or where they come from diabetics will just instantly become friends. And then I soon learned there's another type 1 diabetic and your grade. There's another type 1 diabetic in my grade there 10 + diabetics in the school and I learned about how many people go through the same thing that I do every day and they went to the same school as me and I would talk to these people be like and you know telling my friends about my carb ratios and carb ratios are how many units of insulin you give for an amount of carbohydrates that you eat is or any of these diabetic medical terms that no one would understand except for type 1 diabetic. I could finally talk to someone about it. I could finally have conversations about it and it was just so great cuz I finally didn't feel like I was alone. I was surrounded by people who went through the same thing and even though we do go through the same thing.

26:30 Every type 1 diabetics experience through their disease is completely different cuz one type 1 diabetic may always check their blood sugar too may always be perfect. But maybe they're not going to counting carbs or maybe a type 1 diabetic doesn't check their blood sugar as often as they should or maybe they don't wash their hands before they check their blood sugar, right, you know, even though I like to believe that every person story is different there could be another type 1 diabetic whose blonde it does eczema like I do or thyroid issues like I do and that we could be the exact same in every way get our stories are completely different and I feel like

27:14 Even though everyone is different and no one can ever truly understand what you go through type 1 diabetes is one of those links that you can be similar and just one more way that not everyone will understand and I love that cuz I have conversations with you all the time and we'll just be talkin surrounded by other people who aren't type 1 diabetics about about today we were talking about I mean, like you said, it's great cuz people understand but I mean speaking of Stories the best thing is when you can swap like War Stories, I remember this one time I woke up with you know, a 33 BG, which is a 33 blood sugar, which is really really bad. I woke up in the middle of the night with that and I tried to go down the stairs like you do you swap these War Stories and people really understand when they have the disease and it's so like you just feel so welcomed and so it makes its like that warm feeling inside of I am not alone cuz the worst

28:14 Feeling in the world is when you feel like you're alone with this disease cuz it can it Can Eat You Alive you can feel so overwhelmed. Like I can't handle this. I can't do this and I and I've been to that place before, you know this down the stairs thing. There was one night where I woke up. I had a really really low blood sugar. I and I knew it to like usually when you have low blood sugar throughout the night he wake up where you least you hope you do which is a fiery now you fear that you won't wake up one night, but I woke up and I could feel in my legs. They were all tingly like, you know, they felt weird and I felt almost asleep and I remember trying to get out of bed and it took me forever to get those covers off of me it took me it felt like ages went by by the time I'd actually made it to the stairs and you know, I have to go downstairs to get to my kitchen in my house. And so I started going down stairs and I was holding on to the

29:14 Grayling but my hand was like sort of, you know, having trouble gripping it and it won't point my foot just kind of gave out from under me cuz I was about to pass out and I kind of started to fall down the stairs and I'm terrified me. I was like, oh my God, I'm falling down the stairs. I'm going to break my neck and people are going to find me in the morning and it's going to be terrible horrible mess and I made it I eventually made it downstairs and was able to check my blood sugar. But I mean that was just one of those moments where is like, nobody's going to understand that unless they've ever woken up had low blood sugar and had to somehow get food to their body, but there wasn't any like right next to them like it's hard to understand that what it's like to wake up like that cuz it's horrifying. I mean, it's it's like your biggest fear. I'm friends with had dreams where they couldn't move before and I'm like, I've had that happen in real life. No scary even I mean I've heard horror stories from you.

30:14 Another type 1 diabetics and I've experienced them to and another great thing about being in the diabetic Community. As you would say is that even non type 1 diabetics want to know the stuff. I mean we are school has a JDRF team which is the juvenile diabetes research foundation. And we all get together this huge team from our school and we go to the JDRF Walk, which is downtown at Centennial Olympic Park every year in October and we always go to the school walk team and where we've been the number one fundraising School in the nation for what five years now for years and going on actually 6 years 6 years old in the top fundraiser amazing, cuz it's not like the school team is only made up of type 1 diabetics and their families. It's not just strictly. Oh you have to have type 1 diabetes to come to this walk.

31:10 You are surrounded by people in your class in your school or in your community who will come and support you. They will donate money. They'll come walk with you and they will ask you questions. Don't be like so it was the scariest moment or when were you diagnosed in the want to know these things? Not just because they want you to feel like you matter but it's cuz they really care and even though they can truly understand what you go through everyday the fact that they care so much that they show up to the walk every year that showed us the walk every year to support you and everyone else there and is concerned about your everyday life. It just makes me want to cry cuz it makes me so happy. I mean my friends the first year I was diagnosed. I was diagnosed in February as soon as I was diagnosed everyone signed up for the walk.

32:02 People who didn't even know what it was but they knew that I had it they knew that they wanted to help somehow and it just warms my heart to know that people do that. Oh, yeah. The best feeling is when you get really close with a friend. She doesn't have diabetes and they can pick up on your symptoms when your blood sugar is low. And I mean, you know, when you go low one of the symptoms other than you know, being lethargic and feeling like you're going to pass out is you get so cranky. I mean your mood switches so quickly and the best is when you're you're one of your best friend you're talking with him and also you just say something so short and you know, sometimes really mean and they say, okay now, you know now read

32:45 Do you need to check your blood sugar? Are you okay, you know that was that was a little unlike you that was those little crappy for you or you don't you check it and you know, my blood sugar is low. You called it. Oh, yeah, or you know, you have I had a friend, you know, it was a mutual friend, you know Hartman he used to like he would what make Bets with us like your blood sugar is going to be 173. I bet it's going to be around there and then you know, I would usually say I know know it's going to be like

33:16 I would say, you know, it's going to be 2:17 or it's going to be 1:10 and you know and half the time he was right but you know, there are people who do understand and that that is with great about the school is I've always had somebody I could look up to and I feel like that's what happens with Evie Jenner every generation. You always have somebody who's had it longer or who's older than you that you can go to. I mean, you know, I used to hang out with one girl khaki Bennett all the time all the time and she was such a great role model and she's awesome. And I mean, you know, I didn't hang out with them all the time and they're like two or three years older than me, but we became such fast friends because we share the same thing which is diabetes and that's you just make instant friends with them and it's like you said my friends can tell when my blood sugar is low probably easier than I can just cuz they're so used to over you're in a really bad mood.

34:16 Blood sugar and then I'll be and then I'll say how could you say that? Like, why would you just assume that my blood sugar is low and I'll check and be like, oh, you're right it is I'm sorry. I didn't mean to and they just automatically pick up on these things so easily and even my friends I'll talk about something like Lantus which when you're on shots versus a pump you have to give Lantus which is this long-acting insulin which works all day all night and you give it once a day and it just keeps it constant. Even if you don't need anything and my friends will be like, so what is Lantus and they're not just asking cuz they're bored and they want to know they're asking cuz they actually want to know about what I go through and it's great and I just love it the way that works is I have a basal rate which is kind of like Lantus where it gives me a small dosage of insulin every about every hour and I have different basal rates for different amounts of like

35:16 Time during the day like I have one at 10:10 a.m. When it you know noon when it like 2 p.m. And you know, it kind of goes all day everyday. So my pump is constantly getting insulin. Where is Lantus, you know cuz over time that's how that works for the pump but I think one one question that I would like to ask you that I think is always a funny question is what is I think a common misconception about diabetes that you would like to clear up because this is my favorite thing to talk about. Oh, yeah, there are many misconceptions cuz there is type 1 diabetes and type 2 diabetes which are very different things couldn't be more different and a lot of times not because they're not doing it on purpose but people sometimes mix the two together. They just assume that they're both the same thing and type 1 diabetes is something that you're either born with or diagnosed with just randomly. Well as we as far as we know they come randomly, it just pops out of nowhere and it's not you don't have to control your

36:16 Based on it. You don't have to not eat sugar. You can eat whatever you want. You just have to give insulin for it and you have to take care of yourself because of it and type 2 diabetes. Correct me if I'm wrong is usually diet control. You still give insulin. You still check your blood sugar, but it's also diet control and there's medicine that they're coming out with it's one of the worst things when you see a commercial for pills that help you regulate type 2 diabetes, but they just say it's for diabetes. They don't clarify without type 1 or type 2, and that's the worst feeling in the world because I don't know if somebody with type one gets their hopes up out there thinking all there's something just like a cure that's ready for me and there's not it is so kind of sad to see that. I feel like the media is just completely blown that out of proportion thinking that it's the same disease when it's not. Yeah, and that's why I can't blame people like we can't blame people for thinking like that because the media and other things just lead people to thinking that so usually

37:16 When I'll be eating a cookie for instance just randomly. Someone may come up and be like, oh, I didn't know you could eat a cookie. I thought you were diabetic and that you couldn't eat sugar. I sometimes it's hard not to get frustrated with that. But you have to learn their living with this disease. They don't know about it. So you have to explain it to them. So I'll explain. Oh, no, I can eat a cookie. I just have to give insulin for it and then it'll be fine. But the one thing that gets me very frustrated is when for instance different scenario. I'm still eating that same cookie. They come up and say Oh, I thought you can eat that cuz you're a type 1 diabetic. It's like, oh no I can eat. I just have to give insulin for it. And then they say no you can't

37:57 They make safe and say don't make assumptions they make statements about it and they won't you listen to you. I understand, you know, I love to explain to people I love to teach them about it. And so then maybe they'll teach someone else about it and I'll just spread but then when someone just doesn't want to listen to you or doesn't accept what you're saying. It doesn't believe you then it's kind of disheartening. It's almost like even though I'm living with this disease. I don't know anything about it. I don't know. What's right. I'm wrong. You know it cuz I don't mind when I explain it, but it's just when they assume

38:37 It's both isn't it supposed I think the whole misconceptions going on has happened with both adults and peers usually peers are actually easier because they are young and it's easier to talk to them and they will listen to you because I mean they're not older than you, you know, yeah, I can't say I'm older than you so I know better better lot easier than you know, they're a lot easier to talk to answer to help tell them. What's the difference where is adults? It's actually so much harder that you know, they are a lot and it does not say all adults are bad. But you know, I don't do have that thing where they say. I'm older I've been on this Earth longer so I know better when sometimes they just don't they don't know and I think that's a common misconception about teenagers in general. I think a lot of teenagers get this assumption that they don't know as much simply because they're younger.

39:37 And I don't think that's the truth anymore. I think that's changed a lot. And when you tell an adult, you know, I'm Type 1 diabetic and they make a statement like you can't have this because your type 1 diabetic or you can't I don't know like one time. I remember somebody telling me that I couldn't have a piece of cake and I mean I was younger than but still got hurt a lot because you know what? I looked at them like they were crazy. I was like, yes I can and I will you know, I'm so I had a piece of cake probably had to because I just I'm that stubborn but that's part of my personality but it is it's it's kind of hard when people have these sort of ideas in their head that they don't want to change. One of the worst ones for me is that when you tell someone your type 1 diabetic and they assume it's the same thing as type 2 and they asked you like how did you lose all that weight or you know, what would you know?

40:37 Oh, how how big were you was a little kid, you know, cuz a lot of people assume that type one and type two of the same thing and type 2 is often associated with obesity and being overweight cause a lot of people who are overweight and up with type 2 diabetes because they don't control their diet very well and so, you know people asking me if I was fat as a child kind of like, I'm sorry, thank you. What do I say to that? It's also when people say that they're not meaning to insult you but when people say how did you lose all that weight or aren't type 1 diabetics overweight you look at yourself and think am I overweight exactly. It brings out your insecure side and it's it's terrible and that's one of the downsides of having a sorry. I'm going to ask myself a question. But this is something that I've had a lot of grown-ups ask me before specially at the walk. They've asked if you could just poop

41:37 Diabetes away just get rid of it right now forever. Would you do it?

41:42 And that is honestly one of the hardest questions anyone could ever ask me you can probably relate to that cuz you on one hand you hate the disease cuz you hate having to give insulin you hate having people think of misconceptions about it. And you hate having to do all these things everyday, but then again diabetes really did change our lives. I feel like cuz

42:05 It's number one. It matured me a lot. It had it made me grow up faster. It made me be more responsible for myself. And it also made me an inspiration to other people cuz sometimes they're a little kids with type 1 diabetes who look up the older kids with type 1 diabetes and say so, how do you do this? And how do you do that? And I'm so scared and I don't know what to do. And you're you can be there for them cuz you can relate to them and there's the good in the bad of both of that and when people ask you that question, it's so hard to answer and I finally came up with my answer that question just a year ago and I would not get rid of it. I never thought I would say that I always thought I'd be that person who says get rid of it in a heartbeat, you know, it changed me but I don't care I'd get rid of it, which is

42:59 A logical answer for someone to say cuz you would never want to have to live with this disease. I don't know and it's logical to say that and but I thought about it more and more and I talked with my parents about it and I thought if I got rid of this disease, I probably wouldn't be friends with and I can't be I wouldn't be part of the diabetic community at my school and known all these amazing people. I probably wouldn't know about this deadly disease believe it or not it is you can be deadly if I didn't have it. I wouldn't be as mature or responsible and it it's so hard to think about it that way and to be face to that question of would you get rid of it? But the truth is I wouldn't and I don't know about you. Would you I thought about that a lot too. And honestly, I kind of switch back and forth because you know, I am an artist and you know, I I draw 4 hours during the day and

43:59 You know having you know, when you prick your finger a lot with a needle you get calluses and so being an artist, you know, when I want to smudge things with charcoal, it hurts my fingers cuz I have calluses all over them or you no stopping doing a piece of work because I have to check my blood sugar in it slow and I don't have Steady Hand anymore, you know, so I think there are definitely a bunch of reasons why I would want to get rid of it. It's it's terrible. It sucks. It's horrible. But I do think I would miss being part of this community. I do think I would miss the people like people are just so strong and great and I love them dearly and I think I would really miss that and it's funny when just talking today with some of our other friends, you know that they they were upset cuz they wanted to be part of the quote on quote betus Club, you know, they wanted to be part of our community cuz they can see how much we love each other and how much we understand each other. But at the same time they also understand that it's a it's a serious matter.

44:59 That they don't want it and I remember one of our friends, she says, you know, I want to be part of this community. I want to be part of this club, but at the same time I really don't want they want the community. They don't want the responsibility and that's I think that's how everyone feels in really I can't live without you I couldn't live without you cuz I can just redo plays together in Musical together and I don't think I could show up to musical rehearsal and not have a diabetic body with me. Oh, yeah. I've always had every year. I've done the musical and you know, I want to do musicals for a long time. I hope you do it, you know after you know, I graduate and everything, but I know that every year I have always had someone older with diabetes who is in the musical that I could talk to because let me tell you when you were backstage and you have to go on and you're worried about your pump going off cuz your pop beats all the time at the worst time. It's like

45:59 Constant cell phone that you can't turn off terrible. It's a nightmare but having that fear of it going off on stage or your blood sugar going low while you're on stage. That's a big fear of mine is having a low while I'm in the middle of a scene. What do I do? I can't just run off and be like, sorry got to check my blood sugar, you know. Yeah, I don't have time to finish this scene with you. It's terrifying but always having somebody who's there for you and it's like, you know, if you need me to get you out of that scene, I will run on stage and do that or you know, if you need me to be standing in the wings of the stage with you no juice box for you. I've got your back, you know, it's amazing having, you know friend who just understand in this with you all the time when I'm without you next year that's going to be terrible say that don't say that. I know I'm going to cry o God. Yeah. It's going to be hard going to college I think and not having that Community with me all the time. I think I'm definitely when I go to

46:59 College going to go look for that Community immediately and be like where I'm a diabetics at. Where are they? Because it's so knowing that, you know, I'm going to be leaving you I'm sad at the same time. I'm really confident because I know you've got a great handle on it. I know you're such a great role model already. I mean I look up to you sometime. So, you know, I know you've got a handle on this so, you know, I really love you, and I think you're going to be fine without me for a while. I will always love you. Yes sing with me, and I know this is just like in every conversation is Anna kampfe I talk to you about this kind of thing every day. So this was wonderful. Thank you. I love you. I love you, too.