Cathy Barker and Dick Weaver

00:00 Hi, I'm Jesse Richard Weaver. I am 68 years old on Friday, June 19th, 2020 in Helena Montana, and I'm talking with my spouse Katherine Barker.

00:13 I'm Katherine and Barker. I'm 66. Today's date is Friday June 19th. My brother's birthday. It's 2020 and we're in Helena Montana. I'm talking with my husband dick Weaver.

00:34 Shall We Begin beginning now

00:41 Make sure ring screen to Kathy. We've been pretty happily retired for about 4 years and one of the first things we did when we were approaching retirement wish to buy a travel trailer and that travel trailer ended up being a story about hospitality and you really have that story to tell because it's from your family.

01:05 Well, as you know, I've brought Hospitality into our life together because we are always encouraging people to stay overnight with us have meals with us be with us join us on a trip all cases Hospitality comes into our lives.

01:21 And that comes from my parents.

01:25 My mom and dad were from the Midwest. They were married in Pinckneyville, Illinois, which was my mom's hometown.

01:36 And Mom had a high school friend named Jack reidelberger.

01:44 He spelled it Jacques. I think was probably his own doing. I'm just guessing that because in a little Coal Town coal mining town in Southern Illinois hard that parents would name their baby.

02:05 They were good friends in in the drama club. Mom liked working behind the scenes and I think Jack likes to be on the stage in involved in the drama and they were very good friends in high school. And I understand that totally cuz my best friend in high school was

02:26 Mail, and we were best friends. I totally get that and she understood my relationship with Andy because she has this friendship deep friendship.

02:42 Long before I was born I came along much later in our family.

02:48 When Mom and Dad were Newlyweds

02:53 Jack needed a place to go as my mom told the story.

03:00 He didn't he didn't seem to have home she was vague on the details about that, but he came to live with my mom and dad.

03:10 And that kind of surprises me just because when we were newlyweds, I don't think we would have wanted a third person in the house.

03:22 That was what the hit they took him in and and then he was drafted in 1942 and he went into the army and he got out in 45.

03:38 And again, he didn't have a place to go and so he came and lived with my family and by then my brother and sister had come on the scene.

03:50 Let's see.

03:53 Lee was born in 44

03:56 Bernie was born in 42

04:00 So she just joined the family, I guess and really remember him and remember him being around but they don't remember why he was called Uncle broccoli and Mom couldn't remember either you think was a name like reidelberger. It would have been hamburger or something. And why would they call him Uncle broccoli?

04:25 Not knowing

04:28 But he was called Uncle broccoli.

04:31 In the family, they don't remember that now they have lost that piece of information. It's in Mom's story. She wrote for reasons. I cannot recall he was known as Uncle broccoli, but it's the kind of detail. She would have enjoyed she probably liked that.

04:54 So he was he was out of the army and didn't have a direction for his life. My dad mean while after working in the print shops. His dad was a printer is uncle was a printer that was kind of family career and he done that but he was feeling called to Ministry and so he was advised that he should probably get a college degree before pursuing a theological education before going to Seminary.

05:32 So he enrolled in Beloit College in Beloit, Wisconsin and according to Mom's story Jack thought that that was probably a pretty good idea and he'd do it too and they commuted I think for a while. I'm not sure exactly where the community they lived I think in Gridley and I don't know where that is in relation to Beloit. But anyway, they they went to college together. My dad and Jack and

06:10 And it really helps. I think it really helped Jack to find a focus.

06:16 Beloit to small College preschool

06:22 So

06:26 I know the rest of his story from partly from Mom and partly from reading his obituary and in the obituary, it actually says names his parents, but it also says with great support and encouragement from Brent and Virginia Barker.

06:50 Jack went to Beloit College. So it was so important that he made sure that was in his obituary. He named my parents in his obituary very often. So I think they must have been extremely precious to him live to be 91. He was little bit younger than since she

07:21 Oh, yeah, he was a little bit.

07:30 So

07:33 Jack went to Winona State University and he got his right there and then he stayed on and became a professor there and was head of the drama department and and that's where he dug in his roots. And that's where he was for the for the rest of his whole life.

07:58 And he did Community Theater and after he retired he started a volunteer theater group and I'm sure he was well-known. I've seen a picture of him in his Elder years and he was really kind of looks rough one wouldn't call him handsome particularly, but definitely interesting.

08:30 Well, that's about all I knew about Jack. You never knew him as far as you know, when we lived in Idaho. I think he came to visit.

08:46 That's very fuzzy memory kind of remember more about the game. I was playing at the time of the cowboy hat. I was wearing and not the guy who came in the Roman and chatted with me.

09:00 So must have been a brief visit, but but we always have people coming and going from our house always always always or always people and often they were people who lived with us had lived with my family before I was born.

09:17 So hospitality is a huge part of the story the fact that they took him in when he didn't have a place to be and became family to him.

09:30 And they were

09:34 They were so important to him that even named him in his obituary.

09:42 Xenia

09:45 The other part of the story The the recent part of the story will be also remembered the family in his will.

09:55 Yeah, my brother who was the easiest to find got a call from Wenona State Bank?

10:05 We're going to let her I guess.

10:07 And set it said that Jack reidelberger had recently died and had.

10:17 All named the descendants of Brandon, Virginia Barker in his will

10:25 Out of the blue. The blue are The Bluest of blue.

10:32 And he he gave them.

10:36 My sister's contact information and my contact information and then we got letters.

10:44 And we were astonished and suddenly, of course, they were rocking their brains to think of everything. They could remember about that.

10:54 I still can't remember the uncle broccoli part, but that was his mom's story so we know it.

11:00 I didn't have that memory cuz I'm so much younger up to 10 years younger than laying 12 years younger than Bernie.

11:10 I do remember that when Mom was dying in 2008 and I was keeping vigil with her for those last two weeks. I went through her address book and I contacted all the people there and and I wrote to each person in her address book and he was there she was in that book and I talked to my sister about him a little bit at that time. So actually he had come up in conversation, but but he was surely not part of

11:48 My growing up or my my world and really just kind of a small part for Bernie and Lee cuz they were so young.

11:58 We do have a photo of Lee with Uncle broccoli that mom had in her photos that she can so carefully labeled and and kept

12:08 And he was just a little toddler in that picture.

12:13 So

12:17 So yeah, we got this.

12:20 Astonishing letter from Wenona state bank, and they said you know that we have to wait for the estate to close and all that business then we'll let you know what it is or ever call. It was 17% of the total gift to all of any of the Barker children was like 17% of whatever was remaining from his state after the other things were settled. So we were imagining it might be as much as $27.

13:04 Well, Nina, we start googling him. Of course, you know, let's learn about this guy. Let's figure out what's going on here. What what's the story?

13:18 And we learned that you learned that she had never married.

13:24 We learned that he's been at went on a stage without his obituary and we learned that he was a big supporter of a lot of Human Rights organizations.

13:39 And damn lesbian organization and that he owed and wonderful things like established scholarships for the dance and drama students. It sounds like he was just a

13:56 A prince of a guy and really had his heart in the right place.

14:03 Will Among Us?

14:07 My siblings and spouses, you know, we chatted about him something and speculated then and now

14:18 Jack born in this little coal mining town I did read in his sister's obituary that hurt his dad was active in defending the rights of the Coal Miner's so there was definitely a human rights element in his upbringing and his family.

14:43 But the fact that he had nowhere to go.

14:47 Makes me wonder if he was gay and his family rejected him to yeah like 30.

15:03 So it's not surprising away. What's inspiring?

15:12 Is it mom and dad took him in that's remarkable. I wish I'd known your father. I love your mother.

15:22 It makes me love them even.

15:27 Because they loved him just the way he was.

15:39 They were gracious.

15:42 Hospitable

15:45 And he was trustworthy and he

15:51 02 changed his life.

15:55 It really did, you know, who knows what would have happened to him?

16:01 He didn't have a place to go.

16:05 In that time after graduating from high school and going into the service he lives with them and then again after the service he didn't have a place to go.

16:16 I think it's the only rejected in.

16:19 That's a logical conclusion.

16:25 He had two sisters.

16:29 Wait a minute. There's something that doesn't compute cuz there were two sisters.

16:34 Named and I saw the obituary of one of them that was printed just from California that was printed in the Winona paper and it said sister of Jack reidelberger. So that would explain why it was in the world Nona Wynonna paper. She was a longtime residents that makes sense. But in his obituary, it said only son of no return.

17:02 That would be it.

17:08 She was

17:11 My parents didn't stay in in, Pinckneyville, Missouri.

17:19 Oh, yeah, right.

17:24 So your mom has been in touch through all that time, so when our lives we've posted especially here and Helen are better in Seattle as well. We posted people in our home not for long periods of time, but we have ya lots. I just lonely started keeping the guest book this year, but traveling missionary sometimes

17:50 Missionaries of pastors and friends and

17:56 Books from Germany folks from Korea

18:00 All kinds of folks look some Indiana, right and that's been important to us very important hospitality.

18:09 And I always knew that I got that from my parents and I've joked that one of my life goals is to be as hospitable as my Mom. That's the Hallmark of her life and I want it to be how I'm known awesome.

18:29 But that all fits together and it's not just being hospitable. It's being inclusive in Hospitality everybody everybody.

18:44 Mom talked about

18:46 African

18:48 Clergy who stayed at our house when I was just a toddler and I would climb right up into their last was like I did everybody else. Yeah, they be on their way up to Camp or something like that. They're always welcome at our house.

19:09 So being open to the world being open to everybody being.

19:15 Inclusive of everybody is really important.

19:19 And it's

19:22 It's sometimes.

19:24 A little bit challenging

19:30 This brings us around to the trailer.

19:37 I insisted that we named the trailer.

19:40 Broccoli, and that was because

19:44 These are pieces that his inheritance gift allowed us to purchase that trailer basic.

19:53 I purchase it with cash which we had.

19:56 Not ever imagined we'd be able to do and then you were sweet enough to make labels for the trailer thing uncle broccoli. So now everybody knows it's called Uncle broccoli and it's a green trailer to folks. This is why we have this

20:30 Yeah, yeah, and we've even been able to be hospitable with the trailer so good.

20:40 And now hospitality

20:43 Means that we can take the trailer and park it in.

20:48 Bernie arlee's driveway and and not take a tick out bed space in their house right now in space but we can still spend a lot of time together camping with friends. It's been nice for me. I should to get better acquainted with my family because I don't we don't have kids of her own. I don't have kids but I have nephews and grandnephews in Grand nieces and we've been able to use the trailer is so rich and I've loved your family they have that same Barker senses hospitality.

21:47 Well, I'm glad you joined this family and Joint in the hospitality Spirit. It would have been hard for me if you had said no nobody's.

22:01 We always have to have a guest room. That's ready ready for anybody to come.

22:07 I think we're done. Are we done?

22:09 Could you still have 20 minutes?

22:14 If you want

22:17 I tried to pick up something from my side of the family and I couldn't come up with anything that was worth telling if you're sure we can stop that's up to you.

22:28 Give me just a moment.

22:39 There's more I could say about.

22:45 About human rights and about the value in our family to

22:53 Just recently with the Resurgence of the black lives matter movement and

23:07 Looking again at the history of African Americans in the nation then.

23:15 Trying to understand the story better. I remembered that my brother Lee went to the March on Washington and 19th.

23:29 When Martin Luther King gave his I Have a Dream speech and what's

23:37 Really interesting about that is if you lived in Wyoming our family lived in Wyoming if he was a student at Westminster College in Salt Lake City and saw a group of college students.

23:54 Had the opportunity to go and he was among the very few people from Wyoming at the March on Washington. I have a long letter from him somewhere that describes his full experience there. They were so far away. Of course, you know, they couldn't really see but just being there was really powerful and

24:21 No, that's also said something about the family I come from.

24:28 For people who care about other people

24:31 I'm afraid my family wouldn't have responded as positively about that.

24:38 It was extraordinary I think.

24:43 Extraordinary

24:48 My sister through her work on it in the United Church of Christ.

24:52 Active in human rights

25:04 But now it's so wonderful to live in Helena.

25:11 Human rights Network

25:14 Montana has called Upon Us many times to go and testify at your stuff like that for lunch wonderful thing to live in the state capitol.

25:29 I'll be able to to advocate.

25:36 No, we're going to the demonstrations and we're doing our part.

25:41 Picking out a little bit of a side trip Germany in 1989. When the Berlin wall up on you win. The whole thing open exchange trip pretty hard at building was bridges of welcome and things like that and I have been on a been there almost a month at that point and we were watching the West German news on East German TV where it was able to get through and saw all this building up and all of a sudden ohmite we all stopped and met together in Berlin and East Berlin over to see the wall.

26:41 That was a that was a historic and life-changing event for the people of Germany and I can say that I was there when it happened we went to it and some some of the demonstrators had died think been shot by the Stasi but as we marched around this big loop over one bridge and down the street and over the other Bridge the police were there watching us and it was a peaceful demonstration and there were thousands of people in the church and sing Kumbaya and things like that and then some German songs, of course.

27:41 What is significance of I thought of that when I was in Eastern Europe in 1983? We talked to Eastern and we talked to people about the wall. They said it'll never

28:04 And just never thought it would come to pass and the Protestant Church in Germany was actually saying yes, we want everything to open but slow down and do it, right, you know through a process and do it. Right and eventually of course, everyone said no, we want to we want to reunify and we want to get this done quick and they did and there there's been some problems, but I was on

28:30 United Church of Christ

28:36 The world board

28:40 Germany committee something something

28:44 Anyway, you told us about their process and what they've been through it and they said that.

28:56 The leaders actually studied the civil rights movement in the United States as well as Gandhi nonviolent ways to bring about change the

29:11 The movement to open things up had had basically permission to meet in the churches and the churches became safe havens. I'm sure they were they were safe havens for a certain amount of protests and demonstration that eventually led to the downfall of

29:35 Amazing and we were there.

29:40 What you were there when it really happened?

29:43 Is there before long before?

29:47 We're really privileged to have been able to travel so much in our lives before we met.

29:56 Where all have you been?

29:59 Germany was the big trip that that was in October or November 1989. And that's really my first trip outside of the United States accept his step over the Border in Mexico or Canada.

30:14 Since then we went to Germany again you and I and and then we stopped off in Paris and just last year. I was able to go to Samos in Greece to help with the refugee camp. And then also then later on in June went to the same way as in India. Where is near near where there's some things going on right now? So we were there I was there as part of a medical team hands on global providing medical service and once-in-a-lifetime experience for me as well. I think even though even though I go again,

30:55 Now I'm well, and we've been to Korea together. I've been there four times. You've been there three times on Church related trips and talk about hospitality. Tality is over-the-top and we posted

31:15 And we went to be a ruse together with the Brewery Arts Corral.

31:25 And before I met you, I went to India and I went to

31:32 Eastern Europe in the Soviet Union and Ecuador Ecuador

31:38 England and Ireland England and Scotland and I went to England another sponsored by some group or other when we stay in people's homes, and we first people in our home and so it's all about making those relationships were having having hospitality.

32:06 I always have a guest room ready.