How my mother Perceived thing

00:01 My name is Emily Valenzuela Cadena. I am 17 years old and today is May 3, 2024. Today I am with my mom, Marina Sanchez, who is 37 years old currently and is married to my dad, Antonio Sanchez. Stepdad and I have five siblings. She also works at a phone company at&T. Mom, I was learning. How did you meet my biological father?

00:46 We went to junior high together. Atkinson and I met him in band. He was a kid walking around with the shiny jacket, so we called him Spaceman.

01:01 How has he changed since then?

01:05 He isn't the same person he used to be. He got angry over the years and wasn't happy for himself. And he was very possessive.

01:17 But how did this start occurring?

01:21 I don't know. To be honest, I really don't know. He always accused me of cheating when I wasn't doing anything. He had really bad insecurities and depression.

01:33 Like, when did this start?

01:35 It started when we were dating and there was a time where I think I. I think me and him, it was like the beginning of us dating. Cuz we started dating back after St. Patrick's Day and I was 14 years old. I didn't know his age, never even bothered asking his age, which was my mistake as. But over the time that we were together, I kind of grew out of him. But I stayed because he kept using his depression that he was going to kill himself if I left him.

02:16 So he wasn't ready to let you go, but you were ready to let him go?

02:22 Yes.

02:26 What were your thoughts when you found out you were pregnant with me and my siblings or any of them?

02:33 Well, with your older brother. I know in the beginning I started and I told him I wanted to get pregnant to get out of my mom's abusive household. Then my grandma talked to me and I regretted my decision. So I didn't want to get pregnant no more. And I told Francisco that, but he thought otherwise. And I got pregnant. I kind of got depressed, but I told myself I was gonna get through it. And my friend told me to have an abortion, but I couldn't see myself murdering a baby.

03:07 What about with me and my other.

03:12 I was actually really happy because I wasn't. You were an accident. Because of my antibiotics and me getting my tonsillectomy.

03:20 I know. Failed birth control control child.

03:23 That is correct. And I was like, well, I'm going to have my boy and girl. I don't have to have any more kids. Hooray. Forget it. Your dad was really possessive about doing things in the bedroom. And he Kept forcing himself on me and said I didn't love him if I didn't do things with him. And so that's how Jasmine was conceived. And when I found out I was pregnant with her, I cried. And then with Amelius, I just didn't care anymore. I was too numb to feel anything.

04:01 What about the current baby with our dad right now? Not the donor, the donor.

04:07 I love him just as much as I love you guys. I actually feel like I get the chance to give him a life I couldn't give you guys. But at the same time I feel bad for you guys because you guys aren't going to get the same treatment that he is going to get as he grows older. Because my current husband is not your donor. My current husband does love you guys. But he never got that opportunity to get you guys when you guys were little to give you that same type of love and affection that you guys needed.

04:43 What was it like having a kid after 13 years? Almost 14.

04:48 Nerve wracking, exciting. Everything in it.

04:52 Because I know at first I didn't want you to have a kid.

04:56 Yeah. But I knew even though your dad said that he did it. And this is stepdad, he said he didn't want the baby, that he didn't care, but I just knew that he did. And he did deserve it because he did go through a lot trying to help me raise you guys.

05:12 How did your life change since you were a kid? Like what was your childhood like?

05:22 When I was growing up, it wasn't the best or healthiest childhood that anybody can go through. My mom wasn't the best mother. Neither my grandmother nor my stepdad. My biological father wasn't in the picture. My mom used to let my stepdad beat the living daylights out of me because I either did something wrong or his kids did something wrong and I didn't watch them well enough. And then my mom would throw me at my grandmother and she did her best to take care of me but it wasn't easy because she was older and so I was back and forth with family and I just felt like nobody ever wanted me.

06:09 Um, what, like what hardships did you face throughout your life?

06:16 I was always treated different. My brothers and sisters always got what they want. I had to work for what I wanted because my mom used to get child support from their dads and my, my real dad didn't give me anything and I never had really anything nice growing up. It wasn't that great.

06:43 Even though you faced like many of these challenges and hardships by Yourself and all what helped you get through them? Or, like, how did you face them?

06:53 My grandmother told me if I worked hard enough that my future would be better than what it is now. That hard work will pay off later on. Yes, I've suffered even though, and I've done some stupid things getting to where I'm at now. Well, not really stupid, just I worked way too hard instead of actually taking the time to take a break for myself, that I am where I need to be, and I don't regret any of my past.

07:22 Do you think it changed you for the best? Or, like, has it, like, affected your life in some way or another?

07:31 Yes, it did change me for the better, for one now, even though I've had a lot of suffering, growing and learning, and me and my current husband have been learning and growing as well. Together, I think we're doing pretty good, actually. I might not be rich, but I am able to give my children a different opportunity to do something with their lives. And I will do whatever I can to help them now that I am more stable. I just hope that when things get better with their donor, they can bring up my children's positivity and outlooks of life, because they do suffer currently. And there's not very much I can do with our broken system from the courts and DCS and everything. Because no matter how many reports you make or whoever makes a report besides yourself, they really don't do very much to protect the children that need to be protected.

08:43 What was it like living with my donor when we were younger, when we were children, before, like, you escaped his grab or grasp?

08:53 I felt like everything I did was wrong. I had to tell him where I went, even if it was to the restroom in the backyard front yard. It didn't matter. I felt like I was walking on eggshells anytime he would just lose it and kill me and my kids. I tried making it work. I know I didn't do any better when I used to fight back. And then one day I just stopped fighting back. I got so tired of it, I don't want to fight anymore.

09:17 So it's like how it is with me and my siblings currently.

09:21 Yes. And it's really sad because I know I'm out of the. Out of that situation. But I see his wife who just had four other children with him, and it really sucks because, you know, those children are suffering. You can see the bags under their eyes. They're tiny. And when he talks to them, they start shaking and they lose. It's really hard to Explain that they lose their moment of thought because there's concept of life. No, it's not a concept of life. It's called flight or flight mode, where the children's mind respond differently because they're terrified of that person. And so the way they react, their movements, it just reminds me so much of how I used to act when I was getting abused with as a child. And the things that I seen that would happen to you guys when you guys were growing up. And I feel helpless that I couldn't. I can't help them at all. Oh, and I can't help you guys even if we report it, because I try.

10:23 I tend to try my best to do it. And then when we do report it and all, it never goes the correct way. And then finding something to get out of it, they just don't answer the door. I know. And another thing that I know is that, like, they have people within the system that they can notify them that if they're coming or not. So I know that's difficult to deal with because no matter how much we report them, it's like what I'm scared.

10:54 Of is that either one of those kids are gonna die or one of my children is gonna die before they even get any type of help or until they start helping and it's gonna be too late.

11:04 Yeah. No, I understand. Did you ever, like, when you were with him, did you ever think that you could escape him?

11:19 No. I was so traumatized growing up that I thought I didn't want to be like my mother. Everyone kept telling me I was going to be like my mom, so I stayed with him. I thought I had to be with him. And that if I left him, I was gonna be a whore? No. Good person.

11:41 Like, another thing is, like, did you ever think he would, like, cheat on you and then all of a sudden leave, like, the way he did?

11:52 He didn't leave. I actually left him because he was cheating on me. He was so secretive. And the only reason why I knew he was cheating on me is, how are you going to catch STDs if you didn't have sex with anyone else? That is something that is really hard. And him telling you that you're stupid, that you got it from throwing your underwear on the floor, but yet a doctor's telling you something completely different. I was really naive and young. And his mom didn't help very much either. I used to live with them and they would tell me, no, a man can do whatever they want. You're wrong.

12:35 What was Nana like, back then, because I know now she's like. She's a.

12:39 She's different now. She's changed a lot. But back then, she had her own securities, but she didn't like me because I wasn't white with blue eyes.

12:52 So it was like a racial kind of thing that happened.

12:57 And they only wanted me to marry your donor for papers that I fixed.

13:03 So it wasn't really out of, like, the love in your heart during the time.

13:08 No, they just said in order for me. Well, when. Before you were born. Zachary. In order for Francisco to get a job to help with the baby, I needed to fix his papers because a woman shouldn't work.

13:27 Did you like everything you were gonna have, like, another kid after a meal?

13:33 To be honest, no, I didn't want to have any more children.

13:37 Why?

13:38 Because the fear of someone treating you guys badly or differently because that you're not their child and the baby is.

13:48 So you were like. There was that sense of here in the. Like, in your heart and all of that.

13:54 Yeah.

13:56 Did you. Did your life when you were younger changed how you see things currently?

14:03 What do you mean?

14:05 Like, now that you have gone through all those struggles and abuse and stuff like that, does that change how you perceive things now as, like, a whole individual?

14:19 Yes, it does. I know that people have mental health issues, which sometimes talking can help, but not always. It's always up to the person if they want to be helped. And I'm glad I went through those things, because it would. It would. I wouldn't be the person I am today. Not everyone could say that I wouldn't change a thing, because, one, if I was to change it, I don't think my children would be who they are today. And I love my kids way too much to do any of that. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. It's God's will.

14:59 Like, like, what's it called? What were your, like, expectations of yourself back then? Like, how did. How did you want. Like, what was your dream before you ever, like, had kids and went through all of that with my donor. And even though you went through the struggles with, of course, my nana and other grandparents?

15:26 My dream was to finish high school and go to college. I wanted to become either a chef, lawyer, or an artist. Couldn't make up my mind. I was really confused about it. But I knew one thing was I liked doing things. My grades were really good when I was younger, before I had any kids. I really had a good gpa. I accelerated in almost everything. And once I had a child. My dreams went away. My dreams were for my children to do better than me.

16:06 So you. So, like, after you had us here, you had to, like, stop your dreams and you made different goals instead?

16:16 Yes.

16:17 Like, what were the main goals?

16:20 Well, at first, when I had got with your donor, I. Can you repeat that question?

16:31 Like. Like, what's it called? How did your dreams, like, change, like, your expectations?

16:40 So what I wanted for you guys was to have a life easier than mine if it meant killing myself over it. Not physical, like, really killing myself. Like, I wanted to make sure you guys didn't make the same mistakes that I did. And I could tell you the stories that I went through and you guys would learn from it, and I could help you guys succeed to create a better life for our future and break the cycle of being in a family with that much abuse. I don't expect everyone to be perfect, but at least I can try to teach my family that I created something different, to be outgoing, to not live in poverty the way we live. I don't want to see my children struggle. I want to see them succeed and do their dreams that they want to do. Unlike how I was not able to do my dreams.

17:46 When we were younger. Was it hard taking care of us being a single mother?

17:52 Yes, it was. There's times when I would cry when you guys were asleep because I felt hopeless. I felt like it was really hard to work as a single mother, because in that world that you're in most of the time, it was a guy that was a manager and he would just put you down because he was a man. And I'm not saying that all men are like that, but the ones that I worked for were. And even though I was a best salesperson or the best employee who made the most money, I was still treated like shit because I was a woman.

18:34 So it was just like it was before. Like now? Like a little bit back then?

18:40 Yes.

18:41 Like all about gender.

18:43 Yeah. No, it wasn't always like that. But some of the. Just depending on the environment. And then apart from that, it was. You see, you're working all the time and you see your children and they're crying as well, because they want you home. They want to spend time with you, they want to be with you. They want you to cook for them, play with them, cuddle with them. They want your love and attention, which you give them when you can, but you can't give it to them as much as you would like. So you start doing this thing where you block out Things out of your head, because that is the only way you can keep your sanity.

19:23 Did we turn out the way you expected us to?

19:29 Yes and no. You guys are still growing. I won't. I don't know what your future holds, but so far from what I've seen, yes. Some things I don't like. Like some of your guys's mental stabilities of you guys is having meltdowns. Like your brother having his outburst of crying. Because everything that bad that happens at your donor's house that I cannot prevent, and things that you go through and your sister goes through, and you guys have this mental block in your head to pick yourselves out of the situation and go somewhere else mentally, which it's really hard to see your children suffer the way you have suffered that way in the past. And I just hope that, you know, time goes faster so you guys can get out of that situation, so you guys are able to grow and be nurtured in a different way. So, like an example, you going to college and you telling me you're not going to want to go to your donor's house anymore, or if you do, it doesn't matter. But you being able to be dependent and not having someone put you down every time, trying to demand and tell you what to do, when at the end of the day, you are your own person. You are not them.

20:54 Are there any expectations that you have of us?

20:59 To be honest, no. I know I say I do, and I shouldn't be saying you're getting it, but no, I don't have any expectations because I want you guys to be in charge of your expertise, expectations of what you guys want for yourself. All I want is just you guys to be happy and successful, to be able to do what you guys want and not be dictated by anybody else telling you what to do.

21:29 What are some hobbies that you, like, have or like to do? Stuff like that.

21:35 I wish I had more time to do my hobbies, but I like building things and I like creating things. Like, same thing. Building, creating. For example, like, I can't wait till I get my paycheck back from coming back to work so I can tear down those cabinets.

22:01 You mean you're going to torture us? No. By helping you take down those cabinets.

22:06 Possibility. But if you're not here, then I'm doing it myself.

22:09 Oh.

22:10 So. And then I want to. I have a amazing idea of how to organize so we can have more room in that kitchen. And then also I want to make T shirts for you and your brothers and your Sisters, family, T shirts and everything. So when we go out or things like that, just to be dorky, but. And then I want to do art stuff with you guys, so that'd be fun. Yeah. But first I wanted to finish that garden. I see. I'm all over the place now. That one is actually one project I'm doing, but I'm half fasting it because I'm paying the neighbor to do the road right there and build my little planters. But I will start the garden with me planting.

22:51 Oh, that's good. How did you meet our dad? That's what I've been wondering.

22:57 Which one?

22:59 Not the donor. Our dad.

23:01 I met him on Tinder. On Tinder, A dating app, the phone.

23:06 I remember one time because you were. You had just left your ex fiance during the time. And when you said, oh, I'm talking to Tony, I thought you were talking about.

23:18 Well, it wasn't something recent because when I left my ex fiance, it was a year after I was single for a whole year. And I had never been single before for a whole year. And it was something that I actually was glad I went through because I worked on myself. And when I got a chance to meet your dad, it was. I knew exactly what I wanted. And for some reason, when I met your dad, I was talking to another guy and we were just. Me and your dad were just dating. We weren't serious. We didn't make us official. Your dad was talking to other girls too. But I had to choose between him and this other guy. And to be honest, other guy was better looking. But the way your dad talked to me and treated me just won my heart.

24:04 So he was like he. He swooned you basically. Like he won you over?

24:11 Kind of. But how would you say he catfished me?

24:15 Catfished? How did catfish.

24:17 Even though he got me with his face, and it was his real face, he said he wasn't a smoker.

24:22 Oh, so.

24:24 And he said a lot of other things that weren't true. So one, he said he was clean. He was not clean.

24:31 I mean, he still smokes.

24:33 His room was a mess now. You know, things have changed, you know, at least we've come to accept it out of a couple hiccups. But I'm okay with it. It's still funny to talk about.

24:46 So, like, what was it like in your guys's, like, first stage of talking?

24:53 It was. I don't know, we just talked a lot. We could talk about everything. It's just like normal talking. Like me and how me and him talk Today, but I don't know, just. We could just talk to each other. I felt comfortable.

25:07 Did you ever think you'd marry him in the future or did you like to be honest?

25:12 No.

25:14 Why?

25:15 Because he was short. What?

25:17 Just because he was short? I mean, you're not that taller than him.

25:20 I wanted a tall person, mom, but he was. He just got me.

25:28 I mean, he's still taller than you, technically, barely. Like, but why? You just wanted to date like a taller man or what?

25:38 I just wanted to be picked up and tossed her. Not like, not like dirty. I wanted someone to pick me up and put them on their back, but I just wanted to be picked up because I'd never been picked up by anybody before.

25:50 Did you want to like a bodybuilder or what?

25:52 No. I didn't want no one bigger than me because I'm terrified of men with muscles and everything. Because they scare me.

25:59 Is it because of my donor?

26:01 Yes.

26:01 Did he cause that fear?

26:03 Yes.

26:04 What? Since all of us, since me and my siblings have grown, what is it? Do you have to like relearn things since you now have like a four month old? Since it's been like four months?

26:19 Actually, no. But it is easier because now with the newer technology, they have actually easier things to help with the baby, which I wish they had when you guys were little.

26:29 So it's like much easier now since there's much more things.

26:34 But also too, I have the experience. So that's another reason why it makes it easier, because I have that experience. Experience already with you guys. I've been through almost everything with you guys. Not everything. Everything. I'm not gonna say I'm perfect, but I've learned a lot.

26:50 Like, what is the one thing you learned has like. Like when you were.

26:54 What was the question?

26:55 Like when you were a first time mom with Zachary, my older brother, How. How did you perceive it? Like, what was your first reaction?

27:07 When I was a first time mom with Zachary, I was very defensive with him. The reason for that was because one, my friend told me to abort him. And I didn't want no one telling me to kill my child. Another was your donor's mom. Grandmother. She told me to give up custody of him. So I became very overprotective of Zachary and everything that I had to learn, I did. I tried to perfect everything that I could because I didn't want anyone to use an excuse to take you guys away.

27:46 What about us? Me and my sister.

27:49 So when they found out I was pregnant with you, the first thing that came out of your nada's mouth was let her keep you because she has never had a daughter before. And I told her no. She tried the same thing she tried with Zach. So I had my guard up. And I used to tell your dad, I was like, you need to take me out of here. I don't want to be here.

28:11 Donor.

28:11 Whatever. Yeah, donor. I didn't want to be here. I don't want to live with this family. I'm done. I didn't want to live with anybody. I wanted my own place. If not, I was in a leave.

28:21 Is that when you guys decided to get the. Our first house.

28:25 Apartment and then a house, yes. Apartment, yeah. We moved out to an apartment. And then because I was fixing his credit, we ended up getting a house.

28:36 What was it like when you. Because I know there were some struggles when you guys divorced and all of that with the papers being served. And I know, like, he almost ended up in jail because you were trying to get some stuff that were ours back from him. What was like, the divorce process?

28:54 So it was really hard because I was kind of dumb, you know? But the divorce took a toll because I didn't have that much work experience. I didn't work for 10 years because every time I got a job, I was told to quit. And me going out to a place where you can. When they asked you, what are you good at? I never had a job. I don't know what I was good at. So that was a struggle. Really, really bad struggle. And then me asking him for money, even though I knew I had a court or order of protection, but I was so desperate because I couldn't buy my baby diapers and he was living with your guys's stepmom in our home.

29:41 Would you say that there was. There's a big difference from then and now?

29:47 Yes. I am more independent now, and I am really good at doing what I need to do to provide for my family. I've learned to do my finances through programs that I took after I had my fallout and my divorce. But to be honest, the previous question, when you asked me what was hard because of me going to his house and almost getting arrested because I violated the court order that I did. The order, protection against him from him hurting me and me being desperate for diapers. I was actually given a whole bunch of programs from the officers that were actually really nice to me. Because of them, I was able to go into a program called Maricopa Workforce, where they were actually able to help me get into college. And they put Me in class, financial classes that actually taught me how to manage my money, how to save my money. They gave me computer classes to show me the basic type skills that I didn't have. So my situation now is actually I might not be rich, but I'm better off.

31:02 How long have you worked at your current job?

31:05 My current job? I've been with the company almost 12 years. 12 years?

31:09 Almost 12 years. I thought it was 10 years.

31:13 No, almost 12.

31:15 So you've been working there. I know, since we were little. So if it was like since I was little, so it'd be 17 subtracted by 12, right?

31:27 Yeah.

31:28 So you'd been working there since I was five?

31:32 Pretty much, yes.

31:34 That. That is a big.

31:37 It took a big toe on you guys. You guys used to cry for me all the time when I would leave and I would leave you guys with Nana.

31:45 I know it was hard because you're always gone. We always wanted to be there, but there was nothing we could really do in that current situation. Because you were a single mom and you didn't know.

31:57 Yeah, but on the days that I had off, that's why I used to take you guys everywhere and do the best that I could to make you guys happy. I wasn't trying to buy your love, but that's the only way I could show you my love. Because I gave you guys things that I never had.

32:12 Now that you've had our current little brother Israel, do you think you've improved a lot? Especially since you were like home for most. For most for like almost three months?

32:28 Yes, I have. I do want to be a stay at home mom again, but I know that's not going to be possible. And if I was to stay at home, home mom, it would be a little bit different because I would want to start my own business. But I just want to give him as much attention that I couldn't give you guys. And also what makes it a little bit different is now he has. He actually has my mom to be there for him. My mom has changed the new leave. She's gotten help and she watches him for me and gives him the love that I'm not able to give him at times. And then your dad's mom, who loves him as well and spoils him rotten. So our situation is we have more support now. Both of us work and we do what we can doing in all our weeks that we have with all the kids, we spend time with them, we spoil them and we try our best with what we can do with.

33:31 Do you think we'll ever. Me and my siblings will ever get out of the situation we're in with our donor at the moment?

33:39 I don't know. To be honest, I wish I could do something about it, but I don't know. I pray every day that someone just harasses him and puts him in jail, or he gets into an accident and it takes his life, which is horrible for me to think like that, but I just want him to leave you guys alone and for him and his wife to go to jail for the things they've done to their own children. It's horrible to hear about what you guys tell me. It hurts a lot because I feel helpless that I am not able to help neither one of you guys. Because every time I try to help, we end up back in court. And they always try to turn the tables on me, saying that I'm a bad mother, that I was abusing you guys. And in reality, they did it to you guys. And I don't know what else to do. I know I help asked for the courts to not have him use corporal punishment, but it doesn't apply to your little brothers, which is really sad, because he knows he can't hurt you guys, but he can hurt them.

34:53 I mean, even though he has that corridor, he still has laid his hands on us yet.

35:00 I know. And there's nothing that we can do. And the only proof I can do is if he kills one of you guys, which is something I do not wish for. I do not want to happen. I don't want to. I'm just hoping you guys turn 18, and once you guys are 18, you guys no longer have to go.

35:23 Like, what's it called when you first found out? Like, when you first married our dad, what was your. What did you think our initial reaction would have been?

35:35 I thought, you guys are gonna be mad at me because I married Tony, your dad. I really, really thought you guys were gonna hate him, but you guys loved him, and I couldn't speak. I was really shocked when you guys asked me if you guys can call him dad.

35:53 Really?

35:53 Yeah. Because I didn't. I wasn't gonna have you guys call another man dad when he wasn't your father.

36:00 I mean, Francisco wasn't never really treated us like we were his own children. I know he's always treated us like we were outcasts or we were just there to be there.

36:12 Yeah, but you guys had me. I was your mommy and daddy, and I didn't want. And, you know, at the time when, as I was still growing mentally All I could think was, well, I'm your mommy, daddy. I'll take care of you. I don't need anybody to take care of you guys. I am your mom and dad. That was it.

36:30 Well, why did you bring Francisco back into the picture even though you moved on?

36:37 I didn't. One day, I had asked your grandma, your. Your. His mom to watch you guys one day, and I had something what worked that was really important. I had no one to watch you guys or helped me with you guys, really. And I left you guys there, and I wasn't told anything that he was coming back to Arizona. And when I went to go pick you guys up, he was already with you guys that day. And begged me and told me he changed, that he was gonna treat you guys better and everything. And I. I believed him, hoping that, you know, I didn't want to be the bad person since I didn't grow up with the real father. I want you guys to have that love I never had, which was a big mistake.

37:26 If you could go back in time and change some things, what would you change?

37:33 I would change me letting you see his family.

37:38 How so?

37:39 I wouldn't have taken you guys to his mom's house that day. I would actually make sure he wouldn't. He would never find you guys. I would. I shouldn't have asked for child support. I shouldn't have asked for anything. I should have just did what I could for you guys by myself. So at least I could say, I know now, you know. I knew that you guys would have had a different outcome of positive positivity in your guys's mind. Because now, you know, when I see you guys and you guys have your breakdowns, your moments, your outbursts because of him, I blame myself because I could have prevented that from happening. You guys could have just been happy kids.

38:26 But now that, like, times has changed, I mean, even though we're still going through what we are right at this moment, I believe that things are possible. Like, things can become better and all. But if you are. If you were able to pursue, like, something different or change your course of your life, would you, like how? And if so, why would you do that certain thing?

39:00 To be honest, yes. Know, if I could, I would choose a different father. If I could keep my same children and do things differently. But at the same time, if I would have done that, I would. I don't think I would have had the children I have today. So it's like a 2020 cat situation. I'm gonna win and lose either way. So I'm gonna leave that in God's hands, so.

39:33 So you wouldn't really change anything.

39:35 No. Because how am I gonna know if I'm gonna have the same kid I have now? They're amazing. I got blessed with something that I don't think will ever be given back to me.

39:51 So there's just like a. It would be like a win or lose situation.

39:56 Yeah. So if I could change things, it could hurt what I have now.

40:05 Understand. But thank you for doing this interview with me, Mom. I really appreciate it. I'm glad to have you as my mother.

40:14 No problem. You're welcome.