Jacky Glass and Mike Drummond
DescriptionJacky Glass (no age given) speaks with Michael Drummond (56) about her experiences with hospice and being a donor to TrinityCare.
- Jacky Glass
- Mike Drummond
Recording LocationPalos Verdes, California
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00:00 It's not necessarily what we like right now.
00:06 Okay, you sound good.
00:09 My blowing this up cuz I'm pretty close and I cuz I'm going to take notes to
00:16 Taking down keywords and such to helps us cell phone ringer off.
00:32 Need to start with these.
00:36 What is this?
00:40 So what we'll do is go ahead and write out your name your age or a Jason's today's date.
00:50 What is today the 8th?
00:55 You'll say Palos Verdes and your relationship with partner, which is me just a new acquaintance.
01:00 You want the address?
01:10 And we will be taking photos of these afterwards would be kind of like a
01:15 Redicalm relationship to partner left before deja vu
01:54 Okay, I made a fancy fellow Elton John difficulty when we do for most things I do Jacqueline, but if it's informal With Friends
02:28 You're not supposed to ask a woman her age or weight age or weight is a No-No about the week. You know, there's a couple ways we can go run you can just say your date of birth and have people do the math or you could say decline to specify
02:51 Such a pretty respectfully decline to do it. It's not.
03:08 But I say it was a state. So that's it. Nothing's on the other side and that way we can help the match voices. Okay, so it's going to go like this when we when he hits record he's going to give us the thing and then at at what is it at 30 minutes to let us know that we have 10 minutes left and then 5 minutes left and then we will wrap it up like to begin after hits record. You'll you'll go all go and you'll still do yours are doing my name is Mike Drummond. I'm 56. Today's date is September 8th to 20/20. I'm in Palos Verdes, California relationship to partner.
03:57 Fellow Elton John devotee, right and then and then you'll do the same. So we'll talk when we can talk about that, too.
04:14 And we're going to be yes, we'll talk at we can talk about that. But where else I can tell you're from. Yeah.
04:27 So we're going to and then we'll talk about.
04:33 Just to the origin story how you got started, but first we got to we got to take care of this. So I don't want Scott gives us the prompt will will continue just all audio right now, heading
05:01 Good morning. My name is Jacky glass. I'm a senior citizen. Today is the 8th of September 2020 and we are in Palos Verdes Estates.
05:15 And my relationship to the partner here is fillo.
05:22 Sorry, should I start again is fellow Elton John depote?
05:35 Hi, my name is Mike Drummond. I am 56 years old today's date is September 8th 2020. I'm in Palos Verdes California and the relationship to the partner is fellow Elton John devotee.
05:50 So Jackie
05:52 Thank you for having us here in your beautiful home and having this hear me now conversation. Wanted to chat with you about your origin story how you got involved with Trinity Care in Providence? And can you walk us through what I look like after one day in about 1992 fellow neighbor and friend was here at home and she looked up Suddenly and she said would you and Jerry have a fundraiser for hospice and my husband Jerry was here and we looked at each other and went like this and I said, yes what's hospice?
06:32 But that's all I knew I need the name hospice, but I didn't really know what they were doing here or who they were and so she told us the whole story that has she got involved and how much she believed in it. And we said, of course who's your friend and name was Mildred marks and I called her the mother of hospice.
06:57 And a few months later, we had this wonderful fundraiser. I think they were bad 400 people here that first day was on a Sunday and we called it Sunday by the Sea and I believe we raised about $200,000 a day. That was the first time and it was on the tennis court because the tennis court is very conducive to fundraising it holds a lot and it's 60 by 120 ft. So it's a good spice lab and it was a beautiful day and September and we all left feeling.
07:36 We have to do this again. So that was the start of 11 years in a row that we had Sunday by the Sea here at all home.
07:46 Then after my husband left or I should say he was taken I just decided I couldn't do it without him anymore and a friend and neighbor Carolyn Elliott was kind enough to say that she would do it.
08:02 And the first time she said but not for 11 years and now it's been 20, I believe.
08:08 So thank you Carolyn, and that was the beginning of Sunday by the Sea and it was probably in my opinion the loveliest party around because it was at a private home. And this the last time we had at the eleventh year. We had seven hundred people here.
08:28 Here in this house. Well, it's there. It's always outside but this place two people to wander around, you know, and when my husband was here, he was always at the top of the driveway greeting everybody and when it was over saying goodnight to everybody so that's why I knew if we weren't going to do it without him.
08:51 So we have found a lovely place to have it and we've been lucky and hopefully next year will be doing it again when Mildred marks. Can we go back when Mildred marks is she with us and Mildred asked you to help support hospice and she told you what hospice was. What did she tell you but you two, how did she Define hospice for you?
09:20 That when people were in dire need and some were dying there we were hospice was there to help and she just feels so strongly about it and she was a person like us from back Easton you get pretty passionate and that's all we had to hear and that was if so, that's 1992. That's a long time ago.
09:44 1992 yeah, that's when I got married.
09:49 Was a long time ago.
09:53 So you had a a beautiful inaugural fundraiser in at the Tennis Court Oath on the tennis court and my entire family. I have four daughters and a son grandsons and I have great grandchildren. But at the time it was just my grandson's we're all here as little as they were helping and it's really became a tradition that they all look forward to sweeping the cord or whatever was needed and one is still doing beverages for us cuz now he's an adult. So it's a family Tradition now, they're all very involved in it and they all care very much since 92 as it has always gone every year or words or words. Was there a break in between
10:52 Oh cuz it cold head. Yeah, it was supposed to be April the end of April.
10:59 It's a son it's usually the last Sunday of whatever month. It is September or April. So I think people got to know it and look forward to it every year and every year we did have new faces, you know, people would tell people about it and my husband's business was in Orange County and everyone in his firm was here. Is it Jerry?
11:29 The day with a dress, okay.
11:36 How'd you guys meet?
11:38 We met when we were 14 years old in Brooklyn New York in first term high school, and that was it.
11:46 And we knew all through school and everybody would joke and say it's never going to last, you know, hahaha, but we knew we really did know unless I'm an only child. My mother was an only child and they embraced him and he became part of our family, you know, even at that age.
12:08 So he might have a good friends and it was a nice relationship for both of them. What did he do for a living? I had you find yourself out here in California into NYU graduated with a degree in accounting and immediately got drafted cuz it was the years of the Korean War and he was drafted as an accountant cuz they happen to need them really badly and we spent the first year of his service in st. Louis, Missouri and the second year. We were in Louisville, Kentucky. So for two kids from Brooklyn that was kind of his culture shock, but we liked it where you really did we made a lot of nice friends and then when he was discharged from Chicago I met him there and I had one little girl by then we flew to California because I had family here that were raving about California and we thought this was a
13:08 Time to try it so we came here in 60.
13:13 Five or six and he got a job immediately with one of the big five and that was the beginning of California. We never look back and we never even went back to make sure and most of our friends had to go back and forth a few times but we knew when we got here that week this was a place for us and so he work 15 more with Mitchell for a number of years. And then he said it's time to be on my own and somebody approached him and he became a partner with two attorneys in an accountant.
13:53 That was that was the beginning of the good times and they never ended.
14:01 Suite launched his own accounting firm and when nineteen seventy something
14:08 Ya must have been 1970 cuz he work for tomorrow for three or four years and we lived in the valley at first and then we came down to the peninsula to visit a client of his an accounting client and we went home put a house up for sale.
14:25 When we saw this plate we went to Marineland. We had gone to Marineland years before 1 and we didn't even realize where we were and he we were back again and
14:39 That was it in the meantime. My dad had died and we were responsible really for my mother and grandmother and we buy then we already had four daughters of our own that we can waste too much time. How many children do you have five?
15:02 Give me a list of names number one daughter is Jill. Do you want the last name too? Cuz none of them a glass except this One Tree Hill, Jamie Geralyn Johanna and Jay.
15:20 Because once you start a pattern and we would Jackie and Jerry, I mean, how can you name one without a j would just wouldn't work well.
15:29 So Jill, Jamie, I got James and then who I'm sorry, Jamie Geralyn Geralyn j e r a l y n It's a combination of both of our names Joanna Joanna and then my son is Jay.
15:47 Talk to Jay. Okay, sorry.
15:59 So you had your first real introduction to hospice was more of a soiree more of a right. Then I went onto the board of directors and I was the chairman of the board of directors for 19 years. That's a long time and I I realize they had to have somebody different a different face when people say so
16:30 That happened. It happened. But Jerry was right next to me and all of the hospice stuff, you know, he believed as strongly as I did. So it was really a family affair.
16:43 And it still is
16:45 But I want to talk about two things are like for you to share with us with a couple of things one is.
16:53 Your relationship with Doctor Komatsu and then also
17:01 If you're comfortable would like to hear about your
17:05 Or Jerry's journey through hospice. How did he get a land? What happened?
17:15 Try to remember what year I can't remember the year. He he was he had had a physical which he had every year and his doctor called him and said they made a mistake in the lab. I need you to come back and have your blood work be done. They said oh, okay, he went back and it wasn't a mistake. It had developed. He had developed a blood disorder.
17:43 Which we found out later was inherited.
17:47 But it came on pretty quickly and he went to a hematology oncologist in Orange County.
17:57 And I always regretted that because I had relationships here in the South Bay with some of the best doctors, but he worked in Orange County and he spent a lot of time there was just easier for him to go to somebody at lunch time.
18:14 And so that's the one big regret I have in my whole life really is that that happened and I allowed it to happen. But that's what he wanted. He was happy and he was a tough doctor. He just wasn't like the ones that Little Company of Mary.
18:32 So they diagnosed him with a blood disorder and he said he would die with it, but not of it.
18:43 So he
18:46 They they decided he needed to have a spleen removed that it would make his quality of life much much better. And of course he went downhill totally after they took this way now and so his last year he spent here.
19:01 And I just sat and talked to him and I said I think we really need to have hospice and when you have better they'll throw you off you can't be on it anymore. And did he believe me? I don't know but that's what we talked to Beth and he knew Glenn already and he said that's fine. So they started coming to the house and
19:25 I had met Glenn originally at a fundraiser for a Little Company of Mary he was speaking and I was really taken with him because the way he spoke you just had to feel something.
19:38 And I told him from day one. We were behind him and whatever we could do to help we would be happy to do so, that's how I relationship started and I haven't regretted it ever and I guess my commitment became more so when I got to know him a lot better.
20:01 And I really would do anything to help the work he does cuz I admire what he does so much and how he does it.
20:09 And Jerry last about another year and he died here at home on hospice service. And I remember it was a Sunday and the nurse came very quickly, which really surprised me it was Sunday and you know people are busy, but she came and I took her aside and I said did I really imagine it I said when I came down when they called me down if he was going.
20:38 His face suddenly look different. It look like it did when I first met him no wrinkle. No no lines and a little bit of a smile on his face and his head was turned towards the ocean and I asked to did I imagine it and she said no you didn't but the time you go a lot of people you can see the happy.
21:02 And things are better. So, of course, it makes you feel better and the fact that it was a Sunday was good because everyone came, you know, tell me
21:13 And they did they did and they still doing the same work and we've expanded our services we have more people because I think they need keeps getting bigger every year.
21:27 Did the story?
21:32 Was Jerry in pain. How was was he dating? And he he didn't go to work for a long time, but he was still very alert and known he never never complained about pain. He never had morphine or anything. That's a boyfriend. Yeah. It's a blessing to people who love you, too.
22:02 Well, that's remarkable to that. He was the last couple years of his life. Were you not at his at his home in a home surrounded by loved ones except being carried out and that's the way it happened because all of his Partners live in Orange County they still do and they wanted him to be down there and he said no I can't leave.
22:28 You know, I'll be there on time and I'll do what I have to do, but he loved it here and he loves the city.
22:36 And he did help whenever they needed his help with anything. He was there to say yes, cuz he was grateful that we were here when you first saw Gwen come out to you. You said you thought he did something else. What was what was that? What was and it was anesthetic about him and had really long fingers and I thought I'd never thought it was a doctor when I first met him really, but then as I got to know him I realized he was doing what he was supposed to do.
23:18 And now and he tended to I'm Jerry.
23:23 I guess you always felt really comfortable with him as
23:32 Very much. So I've always admired him respected him admired him for what he can do cuz not everybody could do what he does and especially when it comes to our kids care and I've been in a room with him with a very close friend of mine when he was talking about his husband husband dying.
23:54 And none of us started to cry right then.
23:59 The way he explained everything and talked about it. He knew that he was in good hands and that they were doing everything they could and the next morning from that day. He called me in the minute. I heard his voice. I knew it was going to say and my friend that died and blend knew it, you know that was coming. So he's very perceptive and
24:26 We could only clone him it would be wonderful.
24:30 We have to have Glen juniors.
24:35 I said words to that effect to him to Orange County and other places and
24:49 People really listen because they know how sincere he is and that's Marty is as well. I think really is with a big heart.
25:02 Can you can you share with me a little bit about Trinity Care and the roles that you have played? Can we go through that a little bit?
25:16 Well, I started as a fundraiser and having the party at our house and I wanted to do more and we would just really beginning then it was just getting off the ground and then a couple of years later when I was the board chair clear tea and came to me and she said there's a need out there. We have to have children's hospice.
25:41 You know in like everyone I just looked at her and I said hospice for children. She said Jackie there are so many sick kids out there and there is not good service to them yet.
25:54 So I said okay, I brought it up to the board. And at that time there were thirteen of us and everyone raised his hand that day to do it like presented what I had learned from her and told him how much we needed to start this everyone. I will never forget them. As long as I live if we can see every hand went up in the air that day and that's what you needed care was started to need Kids Care. No kidding.
26:24 So it didn't exist until that that kind of moment didn't
26:31 And I think we're one of the only ones that's nonprofit that's approved by all the powers that be to have the service.
26:40 And what we doing now with Glen's help is trying to spread it to other places like Orange County that don't have programs like we do.
26:50 So we've come a long way.
26:55 I used to call the mom-and-pop hospice.
27:00 Now it's the premier.
27:03 Premier hospice
27:06 Well, thank you for all that. You've done that's some it is quite remarkable. It's really a pleasure really is because you can see in front of you. When you go to the office and meet people you can see what they're doing and how much it's needed and everyone when you mentioned children everyone else.
27:29 Really, but the need is tremendous.
27:33 You know for children's hospice.
27:37 I had heard that.
27:41 I can't say the exact number but there are certain number who I am families children who are on service right now, but there's way more many people in need.
27:58 Oh, I'm sure right so you have a 100 + kids family is on hospice pediatric hospice now, but
28:05 Is sensuous from places like UCLA Children's Hospital in La you know because most of them don't have a way to handle that. So I have visited. I've had a beautiful tour of children's hospital and it's like going to Disneyland when you check in there. That's what it reminded me of and so there's nothing scary When the Children First see it and it's quite a facility.
28:35 Most parents I think of young children want to have them at home.
28:39 But not everybody has the home or the wherewithal to do it. So I would say the majority of our children or at home.
28:49 And that's where the parents want them to be.
28:52 But I visited someone I was at Children's Hospital and the parent seems light-hearted at the time because they knew they they were getting this kind of help. So
29:05 And I'm sure there are a lot of people who don't seek the help because they don't want to admit that something is so bad, you know, and there is something about hospice when people hear it. It scares them. I really does scare them and it shouldn't it's
29:22 It's plays that you're going to get help with loving care.
29:32 Well, I want to thank you for your time. Thank you for coming here. I appreciate it. Love you. Is there anything else with regard to this conversation that you want to explore that? We didn't get too? I think we have a little bit more time.
29:47 No just said people really need to know that they should seek out help because it helps the person who's ill if you keep denying it and don't get the proper help. You can handle it after while it gets to be too much for you and it's not doing a service to your loved one. So I would say if you have doubts you talk to your doctor and get some help.
30:15 Don't be afraid.
30:18 That's great advice in so many levels.
30:21 Jacky thank you. This is been a pleasure. Thank you.