Jean Kanokogi, Marti Malloy, and Angelica Delgado

Recorded December 29, 2020 Archived December 26, 2020 44:57 minutes
0:00 / 0:00
Id: ddv000433


Dr. Jean Kanokogi (49) talks with friends Marti Malloy (34) and Angelica Delgado (30) about their experiences competing in Judo at the Olympics and shares memories of her mother, Rusty Kanokogi, who was considered the "Mother of Women's Judo."

Subject Log / Time Code

AD talks about how her father introduced her to Judo at a young age.
MM remembers learning Judo on the Navy base where her father was stationed.
JK was "practically born on the mat." Her mother was Rusty Kanokogi, who fought for the right to compete in Judo.
MM and AD talk about how far they have come in the sport. No longer feel as though they have to defend their right to compete.
AD talks about how her Dad told her recently that she is his "Mulan" after watching the movie.
JK talks about the book she wrote with her mother, "Get Up and Fight."
AD and MM remember meeting when they were young. AD has looked up to MM.
AD, MM, and JK talk about the drive and tenacity you learn when doing Judo.
JK talks about growing up in Rusty's shadow. She says her mom always said, "You can either be the hammer or be the nail -- be the hammer."
JK remembers what it was like growing up with 24/7 Judo in her home.


  • Jean Kanokogi
  • Marti Malloy
  • Angelica Delgado

Recording Location

Virtual Recording

Partnership Type

Fee for Service


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00:01 Hi, I'm dr. Jean can okogie I'm 54 years old today is December 29th 2020. I'm located in New Jersey and I'm here speaking with Angie Delgado and Marti Malloy. I'm not an Olympian, but I was a member of the US Judo team.

00:20 Hi, I am Marti Malloy. I'm 34. It is December 29th, 2020. I am in San Jose California talking with Gene and Angie. I know both from Judo and I am a judoka i competed in 2012 and 2016 Olympic Games 2012. Also World silver medalist.

00:50 Hello, I'm Angelica Delgado. I am as of two weeks ago 30 years old. Today is the 29th of December 2020. I am currently in Coral Springs, Florida, Miami speaking with jeans and Marty from I know from Judo. I am a 2016 Olympian and 2020 Olympic hopeful 2024 now and I've also have participated in nine World Championship.

01:31 Wow, this is fantastic. You know, it is a very unique situation to be in because we have the past. We have the history of my mother Rusticana Covey that fought to get women's Judo in the Olympics. We have a past Olympic medalist and we have the 2021 hopeful on the same call. So this is really just amazing experience and I'm very curious. How did you guys get into Judo?

01:57 Angelica first well, I began doing Judo because my father was on the national team for Cuba. So he began doing Judo interested and I will make it to the United States on the first born child of my family. So he taught me Judo as well in the backyard of her house and that's kind of how I began my Judo Journey when I was 9 years old. I've seen that backyard mystery or something or they call me is being like work doing Judo moves on a tree. Am I misremembering that? We haven't we had unfortunately it died, but we had a auto tree in our backyard and I couldn't really recent stop when I was.

02:57 But he would make me like at least try to tell you a couple more couple more each day, you know climbing rope all the way to the top and then we would do like when she called me and he would teach me store and techniques and stuff like that in our backyard. That's awesome. I love your dad. So I started you do I guess similarly related somehow to my dad even though my mom is the one who put us and you do because my dad was in the Navy and the offer free like a fitness classes and recreational areas to Navy dependents and you do just happen to be a free class on the Navy base. And so I have three brothers. My mom was technically a one one-parent household when my dad will get deployed for the Navy for 6 months to a year at a time. So she put me in my brothers in it and that the rest is kind of History Jean. What about you? I was practically born.

03:57 2 end she was pregnant with me at the time her one of her students was also her gynecologist her OB-GYN and she was teaching and next thing, you know, they I was ready. I wanted to come into this world and they went to the hospital and while she was waiting in labor. They were going over his concert cuz he was going over it going for shown on so in between contractions, she was going over his concert techniques. So tell Dad that really is a story of being born on the mat and growing up in the shadow of the mother of women's Judo, you know why I've been referred to as the daughter of women's Judo because of all the history and that just does a Segway I'll take a little bit of time it and let you guys know that women's Judo was not where it is today and in 1959 when Rusty wanted to compete she had no choice, but she had to disguise herself as a man. She was put into a competition use the ace band.

04:57 To take down her chest she changed in a broom closet and she was putting the competition team competition so that she and she was told just to get a draw don't don't pull any attention to yourself. But what did she do her team was cheering for her and she thought will I fought this hard night rain this hard. Why can't I win I deserve to win she threw her male opponent for knee pain, which is a full point in Judo and I or perfect score that everybody strives to get well then her team won the first place Trophy and it was just so big in 1959 to win that way, but she was pulled aside and she was told. Hey, are you a girl they would even give her the respect of calling her a woman that's that's how condescending and misogynistic it was back. Then they took her medal away and said well if you don't forfeit this your team's going to have to lose and that was the time that pivotal moment actually affect both of your lives because she decided that that's Nae.

05:57 Going to happen to another woman and that not on her watch in the end. That's how it all started. So I grew up in the shadows of that and I was always pushed One Step harder because women did have to fight harder to get the recognition and same thing both of you. I'm sure experience and that's going to be my question. Do you find that you have to fight harder to get the recognition and to get the respect then your male counterparts.

06:26 What I made you answer first last time Angie, I don't feel that personally. I think we've come a long way from the story that you just told to be honest, or maybe there's just become an understanding in the Judo world that like, we all need opportunity to you know, when tournaments and have access to training facilities and have our own divisions at a tournament like it's been so long since we had to

06:58 Fight to have that basic right and to be honest just hearing you.

07:05 Talk about what rest you went through. It's like I cannot imagine a time when things were that that set up against women in a way where they couldn't just participate and equal capacity like it's hard to even an agreement. I mean, what do you think I think of ways now that

07:35 You're not babysitting today. Oh my God.

07:46 All right, go ahead. No, I mean I was trying to think of a way that I feel that I have less access or did before I retired like do you feel that there's ways that women don't have a nice time since you know the way men do we definitely have the same as quickly I would say competitively we have the same access and the full support as men do now it's just I think some male competitors. I would say I've seen it a little bit more. Maybe it's because

08:21 The culture that way around like some some of our fellow male competitors and I still say oh it's if this division of women's Judo it's not as competitive as like that's a the men 73 kilogram division or like other male divisions. I have like a hundred competitors at World Championships or so on and so forth. So that makes it harder for for men and you don't have to compete against so many other women or whatever so they they try to make that comparison to kind of undermine you I've also had some people might retire before and I've had some people say like all will do you have a guy that can teach me there so I can teach my son because I have apparently you're not qualified to teach a bird.

09:09 Stuff like that. So I had I've had those instances definitely. I definitely see that we have we do have a lot more opportunity and when I go to places like Japan or France or any of these other other countries see the trainer compete there's definitely just as many women on the mat as there are men so I don't see a difference there at all anymore during that you guys don't see that much of a drastic difference is it really gives Rusty another gold medal, you know, and because every step of the way every inch just to get into the national sports festival or the Olympic sports festival to get into the Pan American games to get availability and access to live and train at the Olympic Training Center in Colorado Springs with a lawsuit was a fight and there was so many lies and so much deceit, you know, Judo can be very

10:09 And back then a lot of the men a lot of the naysayers did not want women to compete in Judo. Do you have any idea or have you ever thought in retrospect? Why men were so against women competing in Judo and then I'll share with you some of the reasons they've told Rusty.

10:31 I mean, I would I guess I would guess that it's it's not a judo saying it's a it's a it's a understanding that women and men should have equal opportunity to do things and I guess you do is just one example of a way they were just trying to adhere to an old way of thinking it and I'm sure it extends to everything.

10:55 What do you think? Yeah, I mean you said back in 1959. She wasn't allowed to compete at all. I mean just look at the time. You know if he's the sixties, I mean, they probably thought women should only be in the kitchen and taking care of children and for basically for procreating and that's about it. You know it true that she found out for women's Judo or before nineteen eighty. She found out in order to get women to be considered as an Olympic sport in Judo. They had to have a world championship and there was no world championship at that time. So she wanted to hold the first Woman's World Judo championships and she only had about $150 in the bank, but she was determined and she I don't know where she came up with this idea. But off the top of her head. She said we're going to do it in New York and we're going to hold it at Madison Square Garden, maybe the biggest event and of course everybody in the you know, everybody the reality check.

11:55 Rusty we have no money. She went into the dojo and she told everybody at the dojo myself included were holding a world championships and she did a hundred twenty-seven competitors 25 or 26 countries and it was absolute chaos. It was pandemonium, but that started it all and that started the road to Judo becoming an Olympic sport. So as you can imagine she had to overcome so much adversity and Judah was part of that. How do you guys feel about what what obstacles have stood in your way? And how did you overcome levels of adversity that you were faced with?

12:40 7 Wing something that I've had to overcome throughout the years when I started you do it's funny because I I recently just watch the live-action Mulan and your mother story trying to remind remind me of that, you know, like a bandaging her chest to be able to compete in like a real life like you do but my dad we are watching it together with my father and my dad was like, oh, you're my you're my Mulan because I had so many people telling me that you should do ballet. You should play piano and my do things that were typical for women and he like he refused any of those old like Hispanic stereotypes, you know that they come up so often like I should be proper and I shouldn't be fighting with other boys and so on and so forth. He's like, no she can do whatever she wants and I also had to fight not just to stare.

13:40 Types of but I wasn't always the most athletic kid growing up, you know, I was kind of chubby I was a little bit overweight Marty can attest to this was about 14 years old 13 14 years old actually fought in the 63 kilogram women's division. So I actually Fight 2 weight classes below that now yeah, I'm so that's something that I don't know if it's fighting genetics planning part of the sacrifice. I say it's the price I have to pay in order to do what I love and in order to compete and and bring the pain Olympic medal. So those are things that you know sacrifice every day in the Name of Love doing what I love every single day, but it's amazing to hear you say that in addition to Rusty because it's like

14:40 Now all you have to think about is being the best athlete but that's it. I'm not saying that's like easy like you get to just show up at the tournament and know that you got your way tried and you train hard and like it coming from a time when like I just want to completely just let me compete. It's so crazy to hear those two story like next to each other that time frame in between them. You know, they are now there's actually a place for me so I don't have to worry about him because we come from a time where it's like what other opportunities are presenting themselves now that we've open this Pandora's box, right? And I mean, I think you can look at the for Judo specifically for women in the US like Kayla and I had a great Olympics in 2012, and then the very next Olympics. We have another female join the team and now she's going to be a pretty much D guarantee.

15:40 Angie like going to be on the Olympic team next year with a year to go a little less than a year. I mean, it's amazing. Look how far we've come.

15:48 That is that that is amazing and I love I love hearing the stories, you know, like we were talking about before I recently wrote Rusty's Memoir and it's called get up and fight and Marty highlighted that even though it's called get up and fight. It's not really related to only on the mat. That is through life. I heard that so many times in life in life from Rusty and some of the things that are highlighted, you know, the the overarching message. It's not just a judo book. It is about being relentless following through inspiring others inspiring yourself. It's about diversity. It's about inclusion and it really is a book to empower. So those are all some very powerful words. What do you identify with out of those powerful words and how have you gotten up and fought

16:40 Marti I think I mean the thing that resonates me that with me the most of all those power words you just dropped is the Relentless part and we were talking about this a little earlier. We haven't mentioned it right now is your involvement Jean around 9:11 and you know feeling like this is really hard and how to keep going in that Relentless Judo spirit that you feel and I think that's kind of rusty like represents and kind of what we all think about will make their at least I don't speak for everyone when I think of Rusty this like an acceptance to take anything other than the opportunities that we deserve and just fighting and fighting until you get them and I think that that is definitely a judo mentality and to me definitely exemplifies that as well. Like she's got the fighting spirit and like this pride and unwillingness to give up that just pushes her to the Limit all the time. And yeah, I mean, that's definitely something that I don't know if you've learned

17:40 Judo or you have and so you do Judo.

17:45 I mean, I can't have you I don't I don't know if you learn that from Juno something that if you want it bad enough for your passionate in a few real choir it over time and you kind of don't take no for an answer. You know, you were with me for so many years. I think I met you when I probably when I was 14 or 15 years old. So you've seen like me over the years and the progression and stuff and the hardest part of my career was not making the team in 2012 was going and and your training partner, but that was also kind of like a moment where I was like, I want this no matter what so I you know re-evaluated everything. I was doing my training my diet my went to go see a sport psychologist. You know, I just I did.

18:45 Take no for an answer like like your mother like so many other, you know female judoka since and then I I did all the things right I needed to do in order to make the team in 2016. I need to do in order to get an Olympic medal next year. So it's not one of the beauties of of itself is I mean, you're not going to get a black belt overnight or in a year or two years. Michaels always says, it's it's a lifetime Spore because it takes so long to get better and you put of you have to be relentless in order to see the progression and to see the change but later you look back and it's you know, it's lifetime thing. It's it's

19:33 You know that that's a great segue because when I used to train and Rusty being my mother coach mentor and everything under the sun she always used to tell me to be hungry and I'm thinking to myself. I fought me over 72 que le category. I was never hungry but deep down grit and that determination and she used to tell me it'll carry over into life. So earlier I mentioned I'm a federal agent son, current active agent and going through the academy there was a lot to go through and I I reach deep down into that into that grit and determination to get through some of the exercises to get through some of the events that I had to get through in order to graduate and that's for how to do transfer over into my life. So, where do you guys have that hunger and that that grit hidden when you have to

20:33 Reach into it. And when have you reached into it a good question because it really is like you do reach down right somewhere and I think for me I'm just going to jump in here. It's like I learned early on and I don't know how or when that the harder you work and just commit to doing the best you can whatever that task is what you just have to give it a thousand percent for that time frame that you're doing it and you need to do it the best Altima weigh and whether that's doing push-ups before Jeter practice, which we always did I wanted to make sure I could do all 100 of them and it's really young age and I was thinking this way and I see now looking back is a 34 year old adult.

21:18 But that kind of discipline is kind of what has propelled me throughout my entire life and every single thing I do and I don't know why it's so important but it's basically a belief that you can keep going long after you consciously think you cannot and I think the really good players and the ones that Excel far understand that I know Angie understand it because I've seen I've seen you go through things that are just so hard and just put your mind to it and complete it and get through it to just cuz you're going to do it we're going to get it done and I think that's kind of it. That's what the way I think it was great. At least. I know I didn't answer your question directly. But like that's kind of the way I

22:07 Done it and found success and it's helped me out. I do do to

22:11 Decorate just keep on with that train of thought I mean with school. I'm I'm currently finishing with you in about two and a half years and I was a little bit nervous in the beginning and then I was like man if I've been able to do all of these and accomplish all of these all of these things throughout you do in my career. I'm like schools going to be a breeze. I'm like, I don't be fine. You know, I know I'm going to cuz it's that it's that fear of the unknown. So I was like, I know you'll be you'll be fine. You'll do great at whatever you do. And as long as like Marty give it a attitude.

23:11 Judo with same discipline III I'll be successful at whatever I do. You were taking all those classes while you've been traveling and competing this whole season because of covid-19. We have a proud of you but very proud of you. I am nothing about the fear of unknown and you go back after Rusty got her medal taken away and she wanted to know more about you do she ventured to this far-off lands? Call Japan. So could you imagine 1960 a female going to Japan and I'm in the Antics that happened what she was over there and she didn't speak the language Soho.

24:11 She went to go train at the kodokan and she was put in the women's section which was only doing caught that so she met up with Miss fukuda and she got really good pasta Basics, but she wanted more she is hungry. She wanted to compete on the men's side of the dojo and she wanted to learn that combat. You do will finally she got her wish and she really embodied full down 7 times get up 8 because that was her daily routine and then people didn't know what to make of her me. She was is 5 foot 10 redhead from New York and nobody knew what to make of her even my my dad who was one of the high level competitors there was looking at her from around the corner. He had no idea what to expect. So I mean a lot of the fear of the unknown, but she did go to Japan. She did gain the respect of and she actually tested for her need on in front of RI saekano to grow Cano sun and got her need on granted from him.

25:11 So mean that this was a lot of the fear of the unknown and I know as an athlete, there's so much of the unknown, you know Rusty experience hers, but there's so much of the unknown and sometimes people don't talk too much about the fear of winning because that put you in a whole different category Marty's got a bronze medal before the bronze medal you didn't have a bronze medal. So the fear of the unknown now, what now what lies ahead how much pressure and how do you cope with that pressure of winning and and the fear of the unknown of after you win? I mean, I think the the fear part comes from like, what is that saying? It is the great our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate. It's that we are powerful beyond measure and it's like like when you really think about their you like to know I've courted want to win. Why would I be afraid to be powerful but in reality at the real tour of it, it's like once you do do that thing, like what's next? I don't

26:11 The idea that I could hold you back from achieving what you're capable of is kind of crazy, but I do think that it happens a lot more than people realize it's kind of why they say like, it's all mental. It's a mental game. It's 99%. 100% true that the same quote at play in my mind. And I think that that's something that affected me a lot during my career definitely in the last Olympics 2016 before I retired and looking back in hindsight. I see it then I couldn't see it. Then I could I think I was even in denial little bit about how I was feeling that because I had taken a bronze in 2012 today needed to metal again or the or the Browns no longer had as much power to it or something. There's some mentality around that that I didn't personally choose to look at it shows that they know you got that you got that you got that soon. Then it's kind of afterwards that you really see that maybe your frame of mind wasn't in the right place to have an Optimal Performance.

27:11 Curious and you went what you think given that you still have that Olympics ahead of you in the next year?

27:19 Other words for me it obviously it's a little bit. It's a little bit different. It's taking me some time already. I just I remember you when like you she was you were always someone that I looked I looked up to for me you were here and I remember going to my first juvenile Pan American championships Marty was the only one on the team that won Gold for the only one that beat Brazil in the final four for me. That was at that time. We were in the same weight class, but she was a couple years older than me, but he was always somebody that I looked and I had so much more success than I did and I thought you know, I definitely over the years. I've had the kind of learning. Am I am I enough enough to win? Like I said, I wasn't always

28:19 Buttock so I've had to work for every single thing that I've ever gotten in my career. So when I finally got there I'm like do I have enough or do I need a little bit more? Do I need to perfect this technique? Maybe if I do this, it'll make me better and I have had to sit down and really re-evaluate and reassess and say no with everything that I have everything that I am. I'm in enough to win today out of all that matters in that believe. It's a belief, right it is it is and it's a mental game. What I wanted to ask you is mentally when I used to compete Rusty used to always have me visualize visualize the follow-through visualize doing the technique and following completely through all the way to the ground into the phone into the wind. How do you guys prepare mentally because there's so many things going on outside physically, we all know how you prepare. You you work your tails off and you prepare bit.

29:19 Prepare mentally for the fights.

29:23 Visualization like you said definitely something that helps helps a lot too kind of visualize. Let's say the Paris Grand Slam every year. We know that it's at the bercy stadium and we picture the stadium and I picture myself warming up and 1 p.m. Going to wear and kind of what the drugs going to look like because you never really know and you just go through the entire day up until you're on top of the podium, you know fight by my opponent, you know, you tell yourself while I'm going to go up against the French the French girl and I'm going to she's a righty. So I'm going to grab the sleeve and I'm going to do this. Sometimes it doesn't work out that way. But you know, the more you go through that in your mind. I feel like the more I'm prepared for that moment of when I get out in the get out of the Chute and the bercy stadium. I mean, it's enormous soccer stadium and the

30:23 Fans and it's it's a beautiful experience. But when I first competed at Grand Slam if I was about 18 years old, and it was like a real moment you so now

30:41 More than 10 years later 12 years later. I'm definitely more used to that. You know, I think it's like it's preparing you for like the scenario you're going to be in like I can I'll never forget when I went made it to the final of the world in 2013. I had kind of like been in those down all day. And then before the final end to the build-up to the final there was a moment when I kind of came into the present moment and kind of looked around and realized that my lifelong dream of being in a world championship final was happening right now. It's happening you a Saviour in it right now and I walked out into a stadium very similar to this scenario Angie just described in Paris, but in Brazil instead, so a little less.

31:38 A proper way to do a little more like drums and rooting tooting horns and everyone screaming the name of the girl the the the local girl is about to fight and I just remember being to eat Jarred by the moment and that's not an excuse of why I lost but it's that big relation to Angie talks about about putting yourself in the moment before the moment is there is like there's no substitute for it because you're can literally be a scenario where you go wait a minute on my gosh like the reality of the moment you're living through right now can throw you off which is scary almost in that moment. You don't want your suboptimal with that happens to you, but the visualization, you know puts you ahead of it. It's as much as it can I guess, you know, that's my day job being in law enforcement. I bet I visualized you know, I visualize a good outcome and I remember once I was following a suspect and I was going down into a dark basement.

32:38 My first thought was well, somebody should call the police. This is a very

32:48 Growing growing up. I had to be in the shadow of Rusty. So the pressure of being a kind of kogi was tremendous and there were mantras that our parents would give us like Angie, you know your father from Cuba and he had to come over, I'm sure a ton Marty your dad being in the Navy. I'm sure he had challenges but they also create their own mantras their own sayings that kind of stay in your head from when you're a kid and to keep you going rusty used to tell me in life. You can either be the hammer or the nail you will be the hammer good one. So true or choose to be the hammer and that was what I grew up with. I grew a bit, you know having to be the hammer because I didn't want to be the nail Marty. What did your dad especially in a Navy man? What did he say to you?

33:45 He wasn't the type to have Madras or a little sayings. He would I think he was more of a lead by example type like so hard working. Like I'll never forget so funny. I would I would brag to my friends. My dad has three jobs when they were like, okay and I was like so like he's a scuba diver. He's a mechanic and he's in the Navy and I was like bragging but I didn't realize now as an adult. I realize like you would needed money. We didn't have a lot of money and so I just grew up with that mentality of like you find ways to make it work. You always do your best my dad definitely the fizzy type. So he was always kind of going after something and keeping himself busy, but always working really really hard. He's a reliable guy and I think that's what I took away from it the most same with my mom, you know, just raising four kids a lot of the time on her own in a state away from where she wasn't born like

34:45 They find ways to make it work and it gets tough and they find a way through it and I just I saw that always my whole life and I am sure your dad has some great saying because he's so good at that stuff motivational he is

35:00 My dad is retador definitely give me speeches all the time, but honestly, it's mostly we grew up in a very religious household. So it's mostly you know, Bible quotes and scripture and stuff like that that you know, he would compare us to the Israelites and you know of suffering. Well, it's a lot of that. Yeah, my dad. He just really

35:32 Simple that I can give is that my dad is a dreamer and he never killed my dream. I definitely I sat down with him when I was 9 years old around 8 or 9 years old and he would put old judo videos of like the World Championships or Paris grandson needs to be turned Wanda Perry back, you know before all these plans and Grand prix's and stuff and I would just sit there and I would say Olympic champion and he and he would tell me. Yes, you can do it you can do anything you want and he never never ever killed my dream even now, you know calling me his his Mulan and I'm 30 years old. Do you know like he's just needs to be a doctor and you could be an Olympic Olympic medalist like you could do anything. So my dad's always been that way. He's right. He's so passionate.

36:32 I love it. I love it and you make sure you tell him I said hi the next time you talk to him and Jean I want to ask you a question before we run out of time. I'm curious growing up in your household with Rusty and you mentioned a couple times like she's a little bit larger than life and a little bit of a shadow. What was it? Like if you're comfortable sharing this in your family like wasn't always go go go was it when she always working toward making a change or what was that? What was it like growing up for you how our dining room table was covered in papers everything every Judo document that you can imagine the Wayan sheets from wherever the audio recording. She's a walk around with a tape recorder and at every International Event and record of who did what technique on home right the coaches reports and she would keep a record of everybody. So when you were ready to fight somebody she would know what their technique was if they were

37:32 I did Lefty if they were coach if they came in for a leg sweep, or if they came in for a hip throw she would know so it was constantly go go go as a teenager. I was hardly ever allowed to use telephone because that long telephone cord in our kitchen was used to call the international Olympic Committee the American civil liberties Union to call and yell at somebody it was Judo 24/7 at one point. She talks she was on the phone with and I remember overhearing conversations. She called and she needs to speak to Lord Killeen from the international Olympic Committee as she was fighting to get women's Judo included into the Olympics and she yelled at everybody. Shut up. I'm talking to the Lord. So and you probably Angie heard that in your household, but she actually was so growing up. It was Non-Stop.

38:32 I ate slept and drank Judo if I wanted to see my parents, I'd have to be at the dojo for you. Okay with that was also extended I grew up with you know, brothers and sisters all over the from all over the world and we're still friends, you know, and I I learn different languages because our Dojo is so eclectic everybody from the kids from the private schools to the local Haitian Community. I was okay with that and I was very involved even at a young age involved in the litigation and understanding and I think it it gave me the tools to become who I am today and it gave me a level of resiliency to be able to sidestep some of the adversities and keep going ahead and it gave me those tools. Yeah, you know, I wanted to have a normal childhood sometimes.

39:32 But you know as you guys know sacrificing to go out versus you know, you have to get up and train the next day. So it was no different than your training schedule, but I never was able to leave it at the door. So that that that led me actually at segue to the question I have for you guys on do you find yourselves to be more resilient because of Judo in anything that comes your way? I mean, I would say 100% and Angie you said it exactly earlier the way I always think you used to think about it. Now that things are harder in a different way, but I used to say like nothing is harder than you do nothing harder than making wait. There's nothing harder than getting up and being in pain all over like nails bent backwards finger sprained feet cut open thirsty hungry and still giving 110% so that you can be just that ounce of bit better at Judo today than you were yesterday.

40:32 And that like there if you can do that you can do anything and that's very similar to what my coach at San Jose State. Mr. Uchida. Yosh uchida. He got he, you know a hundred years old this year still going on about Judah cuz he just loved it. And that's his number one thing is like if you can take what's going to happen to you here in the dojo. These are literally his words you can take that you can take anything in life. So I think that's exactly what it gives you and that's what I wish that it's so hard to tell someone that without them learning it themselves by getting on the mat and wish there was some kind of like Tilly to give people to make them understand that as soon as you get more people doing Judo, that's so true and that you don't answer a question for you. Our website is ww.w. Rusty kanokogi calm and it goes into her story in the book yet get up and fight can get can be purchased there. But Angie I remember calling.

41:32 When you were were you awarded a small Grant from the rusty can okogie fund and I remember how excited you were. Can you describe when you got that phone call first? I thought I was like some insurance salesperson or something. How did you feel at that moment? I mean, I think I received the grant prior to 2012. So I wasn't getting any money from anywhere. I was kind of so it was definitely a life-changing for me if I didn't

42:13 If I didn't have you no support from other venues or or support from USA judo or support from the United States Olympic Committee. It was extremely hard to get the the money to just go to tournaments to be able to qualify for the Olympics. There's just so many factors that people don't know about when they think like all the Olympic Games but there's so many steps you have to take in order to qualify for an Olympic Games for me at that point. It was It was kind of I think I took that money and I went to train I completed and trained in Brazil like I wasn't it. So, I mean, it's actually it made it and I think I was one of the first tournaments that I first International tournaments and I competed at 52 and I was kind of the beginning of my my Olympic Journey there. That's amazing and Morty.

43:14 How does your Judo translate into your workplace good question. I think the the simplest thing is like your capacity to do a lot of work and like just Sprint all the time, which isn't necessarily a good thing. I would say to Angie maybe one piece of advice is just because you can doesn't mean you should but I like that you definitely have a capacity to take on a lot of things and she had someone I work with recently tell me I think that you don't like to fail recently and I was like, you know, I always want to be killing it and I was like, yeah I am but that's kind of my personality and I think it stems from being a judo player for sure.

44:01 But nothing I would change other than just to set restrictions for yourself. You have to understand that about yourself when you enter the workforce because you might be working for free. If you're the type of person who's always going a hundred and 10% and you know, you got to preserve your time in a good way. And that's that's a Segway for time. It looks like we're probably out of time. So I wanted to say thank you guys so much. It was really great getting to know both of you on another level and G. I wish you the best of luck in 2021 will be supporting you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Yeah Gino's great great chatting with you as well. And I guess wish you I wish you both a good 20 21 Angie were going to be rooting for you all the way girl. Absolutely. We want to hear keep going.