Kayla Hafidi and Jerome Smith

00:02 My name is Kayla hafidi. I'm 33 years old. Today's date is October 26th, 2021. I'm here in Alpharetta, Georgia, interviewing Jerome my dad.

00:20 And I am Jerome Smith, age. 73. Today's date is October 26th 2021. I'm here in Alpharetta, Georgia, and I'm interview my daughter Kayla. Has he

00:33 All right, so, I'm really excited. Dad. How are you feeling about this? So you because I feel like you're not the most talkative person. But whenever we have had conversations, it's always kind of blown my mind because I don't, I didn't realize just how much you've experienced this bad and he'll probably shaped you into the man you are today, which I think is an amazing father and you know, you're really influenced me a lot and I guess the most

01:10 Pressing thing is, I'm always I'm really curious about, you know, how you grew up would really like to hear details about where you where you grew up, what that was like, especially being, you know, a black man throwing up during like a pretty contentious. In history. And yeah, can you go into some details about your upbringing was born in Atlanta, Georgia, Grady Hospital on the colored side back to my mom and I and my siblings have reserved seats on the back of the bus of people forget about that. Am I, my father and my grandfather, all my uncles were military.

01:51 But when you get on the bus in the uniform, they were sent to the back of the bus as well, you know, separate water fountain with restrooms and Shepherd restaurants, in taxi, for separate. The school systems are separate and everything was was, was black around us and I'm telling you that was the best community I've ever lived in. Because, everybody know, knew each other. All care about each other during no weapons drugs, or violence in the neighborhood. That was one police officer. His name was tripping and he would walk to it was black. He walked through the neighborhood sometimes but I don't think he had a gun and he would just pretty much chase. Some of the kids back to school. We're playing hooky. That was pretty much it and nothing else that he had to do and we had a pretty good time. One of the things that we did in in the in the in Eagan homes, which was a really

02:46 1% African American Community, we were poor for the most part but we were United as one in there. Were so many adults who really made us feel great. And you know, my grandmother and Miss Marron, mom person, and Miss Rose. And my Aunt, Vicky on BB and so forth. They were all strong black women, who protected us, because we were actually being discriminated against, but didn't really notice kids, because we felt so good in the, in their surroundings. And one of the things that I had going to work with me, we have to have a lot of guys, who great, but right in my neighborhood, right? My door on front door face to a back door and that was her Cousin's in my best. Friend, was James Etheridge and Uncle, Jesse. They had 11 kids.

03:37 Uncle Jesse was one of the few people who are the car and he had a lost one of his part of one of his legs. He an artificial leg and he was a painter. He painted inside and outside of houses and his white, my Aunt Josephine, we call Aunt Bebe. And then, if she never worked outside of the home, they had 11 kids in all the kids names, starting with J. You know, Jesse Jerome, Jimmy, James jacket, Jackie, Jeanette and so forth. In one of the best friends and there was my, my friend James and not what I wanted to do is take a minute to read something, because James passed away a few years ago, and I've spoken to his funeral and I wanted to give a guy wanted to give a gift. What I wrote this a tribute to James and it starts out like this.

04:27 Growing up in John Eagan, homes. It seem like James and I were joined at the hip.

04:32 He was a 24. That is a cousin. And a best friend. We did just about everything together, your car, Elementary School, Boy, Scouts basketball league at the, why we were sometimes? No always follow the Florida, A&M band, marching band up, Hunter Street, which is in. Okay, now doing parades that ended at Morehouse and Morris Brown football stadium.

04:57 These were the days of the original Paschal Brothers right next to Banks Barbershop and it was Ashley theater. The swimming at Washington Park in Boise Park and all the picnics that we had replaced. If Morgan III sports like football and baseball stuff. Organized means there were no adults. Do referees. No Empires. We just all got together and just have some fun. We had at Nicollet. We have a lot of nicknames for dads bug. Pooky T hat chip, Gene Gene, boo. Boo. Skip spoonhead soaked with sassy. My name was Skip and I got that name with my my one of my little cousins. Are you? Skipping my toes all the time. They called me. She's tried to call me super but she couldn't said she said Skipper so that they may eventually became so everybody. I grew up with no Mia Skip and even Mike's by the family. If you say Jerome, then if you don't know who you're talking about, but that name was so important to me and it's funny how

05:57 You remember some things that no one else, remember? Even though it was years ago?

06:04 And I remember it like it was yesterday. There was a talent show at the community center in Eagan, homes for us to get together to perform a talent show. That was James. Albert Jr. Ronnie and myself. We had a red, we don't read, bonds and we were sharp and we knew it we perform like a little dance steps and I'm not going to say how will it turn out? But I've never performed anywhere. Since we had a great time and James was important. Part of it. We would sometimes grab a knee high drink. What you don't see too many, many more from the red store around the corner and sit outside by the basketball court or the community center and just talk about everything.

06:48 From our favorite movies. Like that minute that gives at 7 with the Yul Brynner at the exit theater and and favorite parts of the Bible, like The Sermon on the Mount James enjoyed quite a bit.

07:02 And then there was discussion about girls in in Hilltop Circle, one in particular. Her name is Roslyn and James face a light up. Every time you mention her name. Of course, I'll only did they eventually get married, but they were married for 41 years. I was blessed to be there at the beginning of those special years.

07:26 You knew then?

07:28 What we know now, they were made for each other and although I moved away from Atlanta in ninth grade. I took Eagan homes in the memories of that time. I spent with James with me as I travel to different states in different countries. There's been no other communities like Eagan, homes. It was a special place in my, in my time to this day. When people ask me where I'm from, I probably like to mention born at Grady Hospital, grew up in Eagan, homes. The great Community with special friends and family in one particular, James, Atwood Etheridge. I will miss you, my friend, James. Thank you for a great beginning. Great memories in the special friendship. I will keep you.

08:08 In my heart, always your cousin and best friend, Skip. And I, when I read this and it kind of simplified what we were all about, in that neighborhood. It was so special that I cannot get it really hurts a little bit because that was a time when we were black and we could not do anything outside of the community and feel safe. And yet the people in the community and all around musical special, it we were so special and treated. Well, and that I know that they were going through a lot being humiliated and sit on the back of the bus and separate water fountains and shopping. And the other department stores where the basement we had the shop. And you could not draw any clothes, you bought stuff, take it home. If you didn't, it didn't fit tough, but I really appreciate them because they really made me feel just fantastic in. And I took that with me and we left, boy. It was a nobody could do anything to shut me down because I was skipped from Eagan homes.

09:08 Is that what? That's me right there. So that's really powerful. I think it's interesting cuz I had a similar, you know, conversation with mom the other day too, but how much she really didn't realize, you know?

09:23 She didn't really realize that she was black or that that was bad. And how like the community year-round can really protect you from a lot of that. And so I guess,

09:36 It's just amazing cuz I kind of always thought to grow up in that time would have just been full of like chaos. And you know, we talked about being poor but not really realizing you were poor and just, you know, I think the value system has changed a lot for my generation because we kind of want it, I guess better. So when really some of the things that you guys experienced, we received any negative, you know, not having a lot of money, you know, living in even the segregated were low-income black community was kind of see those things negative and, you know, we kind of just highlighted that it's not so black-and-white. I guess, pun intended.

10:19 It's all going to ask you. Cuz you did mention about, you know, how much Atlanta shaped you. I'm really curious cuz you said you moved away in the 9th grade. And I know you've mentioned, like you live in so many different places, coming from a military family. I'm kind of wondering like, why? I guess I don't know the story of like, why were military family where when did that all start? And how was that like growing up, you know, living so many different places and even living abroad, like, how was, how is that living abroad at such a young age? And if you don't mind speaking on some of that, I think when I was small, I don't remember my, my biological father. I think he left. And my mom was there to raise four kids. I have a sister in into siblings. When will the brother younger brother?

11:10 Hey, when I reached about into the ninth grade, my mom remarried and my stepfather was military.

11:18 And when will be up, shortly after they got married, we actually he was assigned to Fort McCullough, Alabama, and nested Anniston, Alabama. And that was a very first time. I have lived in the community. There were people other than black and white. Now the military base with integrated. However, it's just interesting the on the school and I'm sorry backup in neutral base. They have an elementary school will back in those days know you went to kindergarten to 7th grade that was school and then high school started, 8th grade experiment for 12 days. There was no high school. So the nutrient bus would take us downtown to Anderson Alabama, but they would drop the white kids off at one school in the black kids off at another school and even doing all this time. I never really spoke to any white people.

12:11 All these years ever, we spent a year there and Cobb High School was in the black community. Everything was black same as in Atlanta. And then when he got assigned to his next Duty station, he was planning to go to France. So, we moved to Akron Ohio. We have to wait a year, and that was the first time I went to school with Caucasian.

12:36 And spend a year that 11th grade. And when he and when he think it was just at the end of the 11th grade, he sent for us to go to

12:50 The movie friends for my senior year of high school was in France. And that was a very first time. I was called in American Caucasian friends. I would still with the by the French, my, my classmates. It was still colored and negro, you know, where that kind of thing. That's how they were all raised. So but I was skipping to get hoes. It didn't bug me at all. I mean, I was just having a great time and I replaced boards and everything together, but there was no relationship strong enough, you know, church has been with them and no time. Now later when they get from class reunions things change.

13:30 After a year of high school, I graduated from high school in France to my family came back to the US and I have a chance to go to Munich Germany for my freshman year of college at University of Maryland campus in Munich Germany. And again, the Germans treat me like an American is always an American and the in my classmates was still colored or negro, but I was skipping to get home. So it didn't bother me again. I just feel great about that. And after leaving a Munich, I came back to Ohio because my father was, I still in the military in Vietnam, the mom say, once you state, you know, I'm sorry, not Ohio went back to Kansas Kansas and my father was in Vietnam at that point. The draft is going on for Vietnam. Some older brother, get draft and I knew that if I didn't get back into College full-time, that would be drafted. So, I try to work a little bit of Beechcraft trying to remind me, but it was not working.

14:29 So I decided to enlist in the military and I wanted to get in something technical. So, I applied to all these places and all the sudden. I got a call that said, what you can actually sign up, you can enroll cuz you even if you don't, you go to be drafted pretty soon. And I was accepted into the army Security Agency, which is a military intelligence Group, which I didn't know too much about, but I knew that it was a pretty good outfit to get in and what was so funny about that was I went to basic training and there was a drill sergeant there, near my near the end of my basic training. He he was white and he just stood there in the hallway with nobody around and call me the n-word. He said, you must be in Mississippi in work. He says, what you can report this. It'll go up the IG but you will get lose your clearance.

15:23 So I said, okay, I would go on. Well, what happened was later, as I finished basic training. I received one of four Wars, you know, for the truly become leader and it when I went back and I thought back, why did he want to do. I think you wanted to provoke me because I have been accepted into an elite branch of the military. I didn't know at the time and then really know how serious that was until I was on the field working out of basic training, getting ready to finish up and I looked across the field and every two guys and dark glasses sitting by a army car and my drill sergeant way me over. And I said, oh man, I must be in trouble and they said congratulations. You made it into a s a i said. Okay. Thank you for a year at the train for a year that my mom called me and said, skip some of your friends call me because they thought you were trouble, they were approached by two men and

16:23 Which coast in dark glasses asking about you and I said they went back to my childhood. To research me to get me that talks to get clean. That's what I knew. Wow. This is a big deal. But something else happened to me in, in the in support damaged. This happened to me up there is doing training and in classroom training and went after the day was over, and went to good, bear, sitting there with a lot of guys in the, in the other room there. I think I'm pretty much all Caucasian. I'm not sure. But it was April 4th.

17:00 1968.

17:03 Someone walked in and said, one of the King has been assassinated and I heard this voice in the back of the barracks. And yeah, they finally got them and that in my heart sank, but still, I understood the mentality of the people that surrounded me, even though I was in a leak on the station, there were some who just had those old values. Real called out in ranks by the company. Commander. He called all the black kids. Black soldiers out. He says please do not go to I think was bossing with an inner-city. Please do not go to Boston to protest because you hate. You're free to go, but we don't want you to go up there. So I recall that time.

17:44 That was really, really a sad time. But I still knew that they were some great people in the military. But also they were still those who were brought up and probably the segregated South of other parts of the country that come in and they kind of get into that mode. So, I spent four years in and when I got out of all classified, got out with turn. My, my mother was in Ohio, that my father and my stepfather is from Ohio, I return there and she said, stay here cuz I want to go to engineering school. She said, stay here for you. When you get Dad gets out of school, you go down to Georgia Tech.

18:25 Will I stay there? And I became a resident, believe it or not. So I went ahead and roll into the universe University of Akron engineering program. And that's where I met my wife. I was, I have another friend who was also in the engineering starting out. It was standing there in the student center. You was talking to me and all the sudden, I turn away, staring out the glass doors, and he didn't look any stop. Talkin. Look at what I was looking at it. He said, oh, that's Brenda. Do you want to meet her?

19:00 I'm not sure what I said, but he says close your mouth, and breathe. And I did, and then she got closer. He's going to take another breath. And then when I met her and she introduced herself, that was it right there. That was it. We were related to David and I are dates including going into the adjacent to this in the library cuz she was like she was in the nursing. I was an engineering and all we had. We just started all the time. Studying and working part work. Part-time in the three years later. We got married and we got married on a Saturday. And on Monday morning. We're back in class taking final exams.

19:47 And that's and that's interesting because I think we will be at the cave at 2 kids at that time, but we were just really it was a special time and we lived in a queue for a long time. So that was the beginning of

20:02 The kids coming on on the sink.

20:05 Back up a little bit. Okay, I

20:12 How did you, how do you think you got even on track to do the Army's special? Was it called? And they ate. They look at the test and I started the, you know, they gave me a simple test to take and they said, well, you can take the test with this group and this group in this group and I took them. And then we're going to try to get back with you and that's when they start doing the background check. And then they thought I was suited for this Military Intelligence group, but at the time I didn't know what I was going to do it.

20:49 And once I get my assignments, have to train for a year. I said, whoa. This is a big big stuff. So, and then layered it, like always hear the story about, you know, Grandma tried calling the Red Cross. When did that come in after my training? All right. I was scheduled to go to Vietnam with us with the fur, the whole group and my when they start calling names, okay, you going this far to Vietnam you going here and they got to me in the lieutenant said, you're not going to Vietnam. He said your mom call the Red Cross.

21:31 And then he got her here in touch with the company commander and she told him that when my husband is already over there. My oldest son is being returned in my youngest son just went over there and this one ain't going all these guys. That's just amazing that that work cuz I was a son and they would not allow me to go with both. My my brother go on. My dad was there and my brother your brother and my stepdad was still the same time. They met each other. So I got to go some other places, you know, way out in no-man's-land and I spent my three years training and serving the country, but that was a very interesting time and

22:28 And getting back home. You're getting back in in school and finishing up my my college degree and meeting Brenda and then you know the family and in all that started going. So that was a that was the beginning of that next phase, you know, but till this day everybody on my side of family is still called me Skip and Brenda Cycles. Me Jerome except one of her brothers, but they all call me. Skip it if something and I don't think it's going to go away because they're stuck with me though. So

23:01 I have a question. So, you know, I always wonder about this, you know, I think that your generation have a lot of problems with to be honest. Like the dad and I see you in such a solid Dad figured very disciplined, you know, never drinks. I've never seen you smoke. Maybe. I don't even know if I've heard you say a cuss word before, and I know that that's part of your personality growing up is that you were nicknamed or you're at least Auntie. Shawn said you were called Black Jesus because you didn't never do anything wrong, but she said it one time. I thought you was joking, but I I never heard that behind your back. I kind of just wonder how

23:49 How did you like, stay on the straight and narrow in the face of like having, you know, you mentioned your strong female examples, but I would argue you had. Maybe maybe you didn't have a male example MTL, but, you know, you had a lot of flake.

24:07 Instability, and you in even, like, your brother brother struggled with, you know, not breaking, some of those bad habits. And I just, it seems so amazing to me that you. I don't even know how you answer this question. But like, how are you you are the dead that you are. Like, what do you think? How do you think you were able to rise above some of that negativity where, you know, what the center thing? I go back to Eagan, homes in and I didn't feel that was smart, but I wanted to be smart, always taking stuff apart and doing stuff that I remember this one day. We had the Lisle train set.

24:44 And I had it, I was playing with it upstairs in the bedroom and we have set it up so that under the bed, with the tunnel, and back out to get him some books for the bridge. So I was playing with the controller went out and I said, oh my gosh, that was good at picking stuff. I was like 11 or 12. So I went ahead and took it apart and I saw that the car was wrapped around the core of their, to the, the awards are broken off because they have them glued to a. I went and got some glue and glue them back together. They look great and I put that thing back together and it was just it was great and I plugged it in and turn it on and how every light in the house blue and smoke coming out of the outlet. In my mom was downstairs. She knew who it was. She said, scary.

25:29 I never get that. Damn my life. Can we have fuses in those days? So she sent me into the closet there with a fuse box was and I took the old one out. Put it on here. We have extras here cuz always something's going wrong. I won't say who did it, but you send me down to the store to get some more and I ran back and I wanted to get back and finish what I was doing. A redback got to put the fuses back in in the top of the fuse box went upstairs, looking for my controller. It was gone.

26:00 I did not have the nerve to ask, my mom, what happened to it. And I just said, okay, I'll let this go. But after that, they started to buy me stuff. That was very off for you. So I could chuck invited myself over the years. I just got so focus on stuff trying to learn stuff and then I got into the military traveling all over us. A lot of different things to know. When I get back to Akron to go back to college. I have seen a lot, but I just didn't. It was just one of those things where it just happened. You know, I just decided. Hey, this is it to me. This is my friend of my wife, and I'm just going to do everything. I spent, I spent most of my time with the kids traveling, otherwise for work, but I don't know, just have to split. But the other thing that's really important is growing up in, in Project Eagan homes. I had a lot of great people surrounded me, my Uncle Eugene OR uncle.

27:00 Tom and all these Uncle, Jesse, they were strong. Black men took care of their families and I kept going back to that all the time, all the time in the times we hadn't even home. So it's all tied up to what was happening during those times because they made us feel special. It always wanted to be like my uncle's, you know, and have that have that attitude in that dedication and Devotion to the family. So again, I ain't never thought I was really smart, but I work so hard and then it just goes back to back to Eagan, homes in a growing up, seeing those role models who actually treat us like we were all special deal and that one police officer Strickland who walk through the neighborhood.

27:49 The only thing you had to do was chase kids back to school. You were playing hooky. That's all he had to do. There was no violence at all, you know, just a couple kids in the in and out of school every now and then, but that was it. So, I saw a great even passed, two brothers, Brothers, people don't know about, this was a storefront and Robin. James Pascal's leaving invite me up to help out from time to my mom work there. And they had this one year, when they would do these 1000 chicken lunches for this Union. And they brought me up and told me how to cut chicken. I was like 11 or 12 when that old, but they told me how to cut the chicken and I'm sitting there, I could barely reach the counter, but they were just having a great time with me. And it's who I saw this all the time, you know, what the men around and the guy that Bank Barber Shop next door. It was just one of those things that I didn't realize at the time, but now I look back. I see. Wow. Yeah. That was it.

28:42 That's why now today is so important. It's in a given example of this. You know, how I do. You know, my son was, a Boy Scout, Cub Scout age and we had to wear a Boy Scout leader, Boy, Scout Troop leader who had this one kid who was just terrible.

28:58 Is he what you said, left, you go, right? You say said he was staying, he would get into the, we go fishing. He get into the water. He want to climb a tree. And I mean, he was with my friend. We still kill our own and we can chill scream at. And we just going to treat me like everybody else. When you believe it years later. He was about twenty or Twenty-One. He came back to us and he said, thank you for the cabin. And brothers are wrong because I wanted to go the wrong way. A lot of times. And I thought about you guys and I decided not to go that way. They keep treating me with respect. I had to sit down and then when I realized working with kids was really a big deal that you can write. So,

29:57 You just described, you know why? It was so important that I moved back to, you know, here. Because I really want to be around family are always really felt jealous that I didn't grow up around my cousin's. Although I think it was actually a blessing that I didn't grow up in Akron because of, you know, the environment. But I always wanted to grow up around cousins and aunts and uncles. And, you know, now, the only thing I can do differently is make sure that Baker grows up in that kind of environment and get to be close to Grandma and Grandpa. Yeah. I just feel like family is so important in that I realize that I didn't realize that. That's actually not how everyone feels. Like I've been off for it, especially, you know,

30:46 You can say what you want about black, the matte black community in Black Culture, but like something that I'm extremely proud of his just how steep family runs and how, you know, even though I'm not close not super close to my cousin's. I feel like they would do anything for me if I needed them to and just a super strong bond that goes beyond distance. So, I don't know. I just, I really want that for Baker. I do kind of worried and this will kind of go into one of the questions that you had highlighted as something. You'd be open it.

31:22 Answering with just, you know, and we don't have a lot of time for this, but just growing up in Alpharetta for me, was really, I don't know. It was in some ways. I felt great insulated because you guys did such a good job of making me. So, you know, proud of my background. But everything I was learning outside of the home. Environment was

31:48 Just, you know, so negative. I still have, you know, internalize things about, you know, being black, just having grown up around people, constantly telling you. It's basically it's bad. And so I worry about

32:02 You know, raising how to raise Baker to, you know, have confidence in to not be traumatized because I feel like, you know, we just

32:15 You cannot be a person of color. I feel like you probably are not a person of color that is not some trauma. Just living in this country. But just what, what were your thoughts and like when we move to Alpharetta?

32:32 How did you order your concerns? You have concerns like raising us and maybe some advice for, you know, cuz you said, would you raised me differently if you could do anything differently or just, what were you thinking that maybe I was missing and what would you have me? You do differently or what kind of advice, would you have for raising Baker in the south in the South? I tell you, I tell you I was really proud of you guys cuz all of you went to schools that were ninety-nine percent of Asia.

33:03 And I would I just knew and I could see you. You guys, you were honor, roll student. And I know you had a tough time and it's it's it's kind of a somewhat selfish on my part. But I was there all the time with you doing the best. I could, he was coaching Fastpitch, but I knew that it was really, really important. And I have to go back to dr. King who actually died for us to deal, but we want you to live. I do not move the elf road because it was May sleep. Most recent, I didn't, I didn't know what it was. Like, it was like came down to seems to work the plant facility that the company was integrated, but I got you this neighborhood. I didn't know, until I let you know, we moved in and got everybody in school during the summer and when the school open, I realize, wow, okay, but I knew that you guys had a good strong Foundation, especially with with the Brenda, you know, your mom and me and with Dr. King, you know, died for us to have the right to live where we chose. I did not want to run away and I said, I know,

34:03 Go to be tough, but I am so glad you guys went through this because you have experience that very few people can actually get and still come out on top. You know, you can. And I just said you guys are just cream of the crop because I know you went to some sad times and tough time that I was there trying to be a part of everything that went on, as well as your mom. But I am so proud of you and in April and she done going through this stuff and it, when you look back in at Baker, coming up, it's going to be, I think a lot different because people are. So there's more news and stories and so was going out. If people going to have to learn how to deal with with us, because there's so much talent coming out of the black community. Now, I see what the other black female and I said, wow, you know and because because of that when I say that I am excited but also hurt because my mom and grandma on the back of the bus and they couldn't go to this school and couldn't get in this restaurant.

35:03 Taxes and everything. So I'm just so proud of you guys and it was a it was a it was a big deal to me. So,

35:15 Why do I resent growing up in Alpharetta, if you had asked me? That ten years ago, I would have said definitely but now I'm in a place where I really do appreciate so much of this, you know.

35:28 It doesn't me but it also like didn't Harden me, you know, I work in healthcare because I care about people and I have a level of empathy that I think would not I would not have had if I didn't experience. You know what it was like to feel less than I am and I don't want to pass that on in the care that I provide. And also just I do appreciate what you said about. You know, you really have to kind of just

35:56 Do what's best for your family and not obviously, you want to be safe, of course, but if you have to be a little uncomfortable to advance your family, I think that's worth it and it's really other people's. He is other people have a problem with it. That's their the one to me to get uncomfortable. You know, we're just trying to live our lives and we don't do anything. We don't offend people. We try not to offend people, try not to harm people. I think would be excellent Neighbours to have and you know why you would choose some other family over us, you know, that's not doesn't make sense. So that's on them, that's their own problem. But I kind of thought about, you know, I do think that, if we, if I can insulate Baker and just provide him with like a different station family unit, then he and I'm open to therapy and counseling in a way where

36:56 He comes to that really realization a little bit quicker than I did. Because I do think, you know, yeah, we should be able to live in a community that safe and we should be able to go to school systems that have you? No good rating. We shouldn't have to feel like we only belonging one space. And so he's got great surrounding and surrounding family members. And even like you do with April that she's a teaching, the school is 99% Caucasian. Mother daughter is probably ninety-nine percent people of color hospital and in my son's AT&T, so we've got that arm out there all over the community with respect and they're more. People begin to realize it. He'll let you know. We got to leave you alone and we are and I hold no grudges against because I know that when you raise a certain way black and white, you can take care of that for a while then you going to realize it. What what did I do?

37:56 You look. So at one more quick question, which is like and I think I know the answer, but do you feel like hopeful with everything that's going on, you know, and everything just seems like it's going to be tough. But yes, I do cuz I look around and look at a lot of the Next Generation coming up. It's going to change. Change is hard to get in hard to get out of changes. Heart is going to come in and I see it in the city is going to be. So hurt feelings, along the way, but I see a generation coming up. This going to make a big difference, you know, just got to hang in there. That's what I needed to hear. Cuz sometimes the skills, all doom and gloom. But then, you know, I think you've been through many Ebbs and flows this nation's experience and know, you know that like just because it looks

38:46 Boutiques doesn't mean that, you know, like you said, changes uncomfortable. And so this is hopefully the uncomfortable part. I thank you so much for this. Like, I know you were a little hesitant, but for me, this is priceless. And like, I'm on the verge of tears cuz it's just you don't get a chance to really have these kind of conversations. And now, to know that I have this recorded, you know, for all of time into pass down. And yeah, just thank you so much for doing this and for being such an awesome, dad, appreciate it. Sometimes hard to go back to the past and talk about it. But then, again, that's who I am. That's where I came from. And I am so proud of the people back there. Who went through so much to make me the man. I am today. I really appreciate that and I thank you for this opportunity. I love you, too.