Bryce Fisher, Nancy Goodson, and Nanci-Jane Friedmann

00:01 My name is Nancy good son. I am 66 years old. Today's date is January 26th 2017. Where are in Torrance, California? And my relationship to partner is his mom.

00:20 Hello, my name is Bryce Fisher. I'm 30 years old today is the 26th of January 2017. We are in Torrance and

00:32 She's my mom. I am her youngest son.

00:39 And we are here. I would like to ask Bryce about the

00:48 Journey that we've had starting back in 2009 when you were diagnosed with

00:58 Alveolar soft part sarcoma, which words we never heard it and it's also a Cancer and we had no idea anything like this was coming into our life no idea.

01:15 So I just remember that so I had

01:23 Last time I mention two years prior.

01:28 Tag Germany and I remember before I left I had had the physical that everyone has to go through make sure we're healthy Etc. And I remember the doctor when he was just before the final kind of signature had asked anything else and I said, well, I have a little knot in my muscle in my leg. But that's all and he's said, okay, it's a knot and I said, yeah, I just pulled my muscle.

02:01 So he signed all the papers and then throughout the two years of being in Germany riding my bike walking around slowly would grow but it never caused pain never got in the way of doing missionary work in a couple of the people. I was with like Bryce have them feel it. We called it Hector. That was the name that we gave this lump in my leg and

02:37 Again, and never cause pain while I was in Germany. I do remember one night having the feeling that it was a tumor and I remember on our free day looking up what tumors feel like and things and he was crying a little just because you know, when you look up things on the internet, they always tend to be the worst case scenario, so I kind of told myself. All right well,

03:16 Whatever it is. It's no use worrying about it now cuz I'm here and finish the two years and then go home. So I finish the two years go home and I didn't have insurance at that time. I started school at El Camino and then after a couple months finally the insurance kicked in and I remember one night. I had this like throbbing pain in my left leg and middle of the night and now it woke me up and it was shooting down my leg and up my back and I just remember the throbbing of the tumor area. I mean at that point, of course I didn't I didn't know it was a tumor but Hector was throbbing and then it just felt like, you know nerve lie.

04:16 Down my leg up my back.

04:19 It ended up. Yeah, there was like

04:25 Prior to that nothing, you know, I could I could feel it and it felt like it was about the size of a golf ball which later learned that's because it was so deep in the muscle that it was actually a lot bigger, but finally after some adjustments I had to make with insurance cuz it was through dad's work. I was finally able to go and get a ultrasound which was useless cuz it basically the doctor came back and said, yep, you have something there and I was like, yeah, I know I told you that I have something so then he ordered the core guided biopsy and I remember I was just really scared of what it was going to be so I didn't tell you I didn't tell.

05:25 I didn't tell anyone, but I had patty just a friend from high school. I'm not just a friend, but I had her come with me to.

05:39 Sorry already just know I can visualize in it but biopsy appointment. Yeah, and so I just remember going in to have their little not little it was actually a big needle and so he's numb the area shoved it in a few clicks and it basically like chops a little bit from the center and they sent it off and then waited on April 17th. It was a Friday. I was at work.

06:23 And

06:26 This is a day after your birthday. And I remember we had planned already to meet up at Heather's place in Huntington Beach my sister Heather to celebrate your birthday. And so I got a call on that Friday. How many laws that were opsy? Did you get the can't remember? I think the biopsy was end of March. This was mental issue of April soak up anyway, but

07:05 Yeah, I just remember my doctor asking. Is there any way that you can get here soon as possible? And I said sure I'm told my boss you said of course, so I left and I just remember being in the doctor's office and the doctor coming in and

07:30 Just hearing the words, you know, you have it's cancerous, you know yet if this cancer and it's a rare sarcoma called alveolar soft part sarcoma.

07:45 And so I'm by myself and I'm in the doctor's office and I'm trying to I'm sure you thought I was crazy cuz I just had a smile on my face that I was just listening to what he had to say. And I remember he was like, yeah, I never heard of it. So I looked it up on Wikipedia and then I'm like don't tell a patient that you look up there at least lie and say it was like from medical journal anyways, so I remember him leaving and I remember while he was leaving all I had were some dollar bills in my wallet and Fanning my eyes to keep from crying cuz I just didn't do not want to

08:36 Crying middle of the doctor's appointment and hard to hear

08:47 21 2021 I can't remember whatever I was in 2009. I don't want to do the math. But yeah, and so

09:02 Yeah, I remember he came back and the first question after he kind of explained a little bit. So it's a vascular sarcoma and it's rare when he said okay any questions I have the first question I asked was what do we do?

09:21 And I think that's

09:27 Kind of always

09:29 Looking back

09:32 Through everything that we've gone through. I think I've tried to keep that my

09:41 Response now is all right.

09:46 Now, what do we do? And so

09:50 I just remembered then going back to my car.

09:55 Crying

09:57 Men going back to work having to tell my boss that I just found out that I have this rare cancer. I mean

10:12 Just

10:13 Politely asked would I be able to go home early and is like of course? Yeah, and at that point when I become friends with my other coworkers like Val and Rosa and so I told them as well.

10:33 No, I wait. I told them I would talk to them later cuz I knew I couldn't deal with it right away, but

10:46 Anyways until then was your birthday weekend and Huntington Beach at Heather's place, and I just remember

11:00 At some point being in Heathers kitchen and

11:14 It was not what we expected.

11:19 It's hard. It's really hard.

11:23 So it can do it. I think I would just

11:27 Hope you can just

11:30 I need to take it away.

11:36 And remember the three of us just in the kitchen.

11:41 Hugging and crying and

11:45 At some point that I'm sure I made a joke to try and lighten going to a movie and going out to dinner and

12:01 I just remember after that it was like a whole world Whirlwind that summer because it was like, all right. I was still at school in El Camino cuz I was taking classes but I had the primary tumor in my leg taken out and I had the month recovery, but I had promised my friendly see who I was in a dance class with that. I was going to be ready for that dance performance at El Camino at the end of the school year and

12:44 And I did it and I was ready and

12:48 You know, I just

12:52 Hey, I was remarkable because that was how you say it was the day after Mother's Day that you had your surgery and I think it was the middle of June when you performed and you didn't have any limp or issues me to deposit doble and a Tango. And yeah, you're amazing. It was a remarkable performance.

13:20 One of the best day of his I think I've ever seen but one thing that I remember is I was driving down going someplace on.

13:32 Prairie Avenue, heading towards like the 190th and I had gotten a call from your doctor and they had taken the scan of your lungs because that's usually the first place where tumors metastasize to and he told me to plan for end-of-life because your lungs had been so heavily already filled with tumors and I just remember no breaking down crying and thinking yeah, that's probably not what we want to do and going back to your thought of what can we do?

14:16 Then we I mean, maybe it's good that no one ever told me that I knew ya after I had the primary tumor removed. I had round of radiation once healed that then we did the chest scan and they said after 30, they kind of stopped counting and they said inoperable and I just remember or the hearing about this, dr. Rola and then dr. Federman mind collagist referred. Hey, there's this doctor doctor role in real life. We already know dr. Eleni so and he was in Germany and I just heard my mission in Germany's so I was like, hey guess we're going back to Germany to have his lung surgery and that summer we had fundraisers I did.

15:16 Turn off silent auctions. I did car washes. I did what else did I do? I did a Ruby's fundraiser garage sale. What else? Oh, I didn't go online go fund me braces Miracle kind of thing. And I just remember where was the one in the bar a silent auction down in Rodeo Drive.

15:53 It was I mean, I just remember I was

15:59 Assuming that's where I learned how to just go for things. You know, like just asked I remember I had to just ask people be like, hey, will you donate this? Will you don't you know, will you helping people were always more than happy to help out and I mean we were able to raise like 18,000 and so the surgery itself was like 40 or so and I mean it was still a lot of money plus the travel and stuff boo. I mean we are so blessed with people donating flight miles. Church meeting you being able to stay with

16:53 These families and being taken care of. I know that was more my concern with going to Germany.

17:05 For the surgery was I mean I spoke German I was there for two years and I knew I could talk to the doctor the nurses and everything. I was just more worried cuz I knew that.

17:22 If you

17:24 Didn't know what was going on that would just

17:30 Make the worry even worse, you know, cuz you know not knowing is the foreign country here now to have this lung surgery on your baby your youngest child and yeah a lot of lot of scary things that you don't really think this is what I'm excited to do, you know, it's not usually what you think of is it

18:06 And knowing that you're going to stay there for both surgeries that it was going to be three months that you're going to be there. It was a daunting initially think about but again, all the blessings that we had received like again knowing somebody that I could stay with the family was so sweet and helpful and I felt like just

18:33 Not even imposing on them. They made me feel at home. They made me feel like a part of their family. They took me into, you know, play volleyball. They let me use her bike to ride the bike to the hospital to see you and you were there in the hospital and helping another patient who was woman who had the same sarcoma from Florida and she was older but she didn't know any German and yet you interpreted the anesthesiologist procedures for her. So she knew what was going on and tell her I need to shave before. I remember having to translate that was very awkward. But I mean the nurses were very glad that I spoke to her cuz I'm sure they were like a great here's another American who probably doesn't speak German and soon as I arrived in German in there like

19:33 Is really nice. So they always love coming into my room because I think they were just so fascinated by this all you wanted to be able to speak German and was always laughing and joking and smiling and anyways, but and then

19:55 I mean

19:58 That experience I feel like

20:03 Was really a beginning of you and I

20:12 The beginning of

20:15 Our journey

20:22 We were there I was there.

20:26 Most of the time

20:29 At the time my husband wanted me to come home in between surgeries. And so I took care of him. Actually. He had a little bit of heart issues. So I was here at home and torrents for a few weeks to make sure he was okay and then I went back to be there for your second surgery. And again, we made lemonade and some lemonade some lemon curd some lemon meringue pie. That's right. That's what it is that we had such an incredibly.

21:09 Good time, when you come out of surgery was probably the hardest thing.

21:21 To watch you in that you don't pain but yet there.

21:26 Techniques over there and the technology that they have in Germany are amazing. And I know that your healing went so quickly and it was actually a miracle to see how well and fast you came out of it and after the first surgery, I remember we walked home from the hospital, which was pretty incredible after having open chest lung surgery.

21:57 I just remember walking around Europe driving around Europe train stations and sleeping on trains and new like I feel like most people probably wouldn't have been able to do that in general. But I was just so excited to be in Europe again, you know that I think that excitement took over and to go and see your mission president after that see all the people that I've gotten to know and the Germany and that was really nice because obviously they knew me from that but then knowing

22:46 How the surgery had just happened and so it was really it was really a meaningful thing to be able to see them in that context and then support in the love that they gave you.

23:07 Far so I served my mission up in the northern part of Germany. And this was in near Dresden so further south. So that's why the families that you stayed with was so amazing because those were not the people that I knew from my mission, you know, these are just members of the church who heard there's this woman and her son having you know, he's having lung surgery. Is there a family that would open their home and they volunteered and

23:54 Not just okay. Yeah, here's your room have fun, but they took care of you. And again, that was what I was worried about was Kelly made me feel like remember their family. They fed me they had meals they work. So amazing we go places we go to church weed again. They took me to play volleyball to get some exercise to go visiting downtown Dresden and different things and the one thing that was amazing. I thought it said they would still come to visit you in the hospital. We became friends. We became friends with their other family members. It became such a Incredible Egg experience of meeting these people by virtue of an individual that was in my ward here in Torrance, but I never I didn't know him, but in other words it's like this.

24:54 Amazing networking that brought us. That was the first big

25:03 Blessing miracle that

25:07 We experienced and ever since then it's just been.

25:13 I mean just Miracles, you know, there's just no other way to talk about it. You know, there's every time.

25:26 Times up in the hospital or something there. It seems like there was always

25:33 A miracle attached to it. You know I went to when we went to Kyle and Isabel's wedding the fact that when I had this blood clot in my foot with swelling up, well, both of them are doctors and both of them noticing them. Both of them were there to tell me go to the hospital and if they weren't there I probably would have just kept walking on it thinking it's swollen whatever and who knows if blood clot would have done something and then going to Europe on that trip so you would have continued on to Europe and so it's just

26:23 And throughout the years since then there been so many different situations where you been in the hospital and we didn't know what was going to be happening. Especially the one time when you had already had stereotactic radiation for the for tumors in your brain and then sauteed already then metastasized to your brain. And after that there was also another one that started showing up in the front lobe of your brain and your first oncologists nurse had said, there's nothing that we can do and we were in the hallway and she would tell me know there's nothing

27:00 That they can do.

27:02 And again, okay. This is not what I want to hear either obviously and then suddenly there's is physician's assistant that just comes in and she goes, oh we can do brain surgery. He's a great candidate for this particular procedure.

27:25 And I said, okay, here we go. Let's get it done. And again, it was another long procedure to try and get your brain to go down and you're in the hospital long time for that first of all, and then you had brain surgery for that.

27:50 I was just going to say he had just going from surgery to surgery to Surf. It's like cuz after that then we found the heart tumor that was.

28:04 So Random like very random like someone even said at one point like they generally never have tumors in hearts and so the fact that we'd at some point got a scan of the heart just before we weren't even looking for tumors in the heart it was just a random scan that we had done and then because of that they saw something and because they saw something then we had you no more scans and

28:40 Turned out okay. There's this little nodule tumor in the left ventricle and I was doing a therapy chemone.

28:52 And we are singing. Okay. Let's see if it shrinks if it shrinks it didn't so they said do you know?

29:02 We got to get it out. And so and that wasn't too long after the brain surgery was like alright, my head's open now. My chest is offended is just and I remember being in the room when they ultrasound tech did the pre-op ultrasound just before you're going into surgery and watching the tumor literally being attached inside your left ventricle and it the blood flow causing it to move up and down and I could see that marble sized tumor.

29:49 Being right there in your heart and knowing that there is a chance it could have popped off and blocked the blood flow of heart failure immediately. So Another Blessing that we had amazing incredibly amazing. I was actually reading a Time magazine in the waiting room of that office visit where it said cancer does not start in the Hartwell. I understand that cancer doesn't start in the hardwood because you had a muscular vascular type cancer. That's why it

30:27 Spread through the heart and then the time that we went to the hospital cuz your stomach and your abdomen hurts so bad and we had no idea what was going on there and you have another big tumor in your abdomen and then radiation again.

30:46 And for me, it was a tough year because that was when Don was my husband had Alzheimer's and so I was caring.

30:58 For him as well and he had some rough times at

31:07 Different Care Centers where he was living and so

31:12 It was either being in the hospital with you caring for you or

31:19 Going back to

31:22 Get Dawn.

31:25 Moved from one Care Center to another Care Center.

31:30 Knowing how hard it is on Noah Cyrus patient to keep

31:35 Moving them

31:37 Tony place because they do not understand these things are

31:47 And yet he was always.

31:51 Willing to go with me. He always looked.

31:54 Happy what? I can't and I was so glad that.

32:00 Through that whole time. He was still willing to

32:04 Let me care for him to

32:09 So between the two of you it was

32:14 A year of caregiving for both of you

32:19 Nose hard on me because I knew that.

32:24 And that's I think something like I would talk with my friend, Jessica Bailey.

32:32 She was a friend who also had cancer who passed away, but

32:42 I just remember both of us always talking about feeling like were.

32:51 A liability

32:54 And I'm just really it's always been hard to.

33:01 See how much you do and

33:05 Try my best to

33:10 Take care of myself as much as I can.

33:14 Can you do that's what's remarkable. I think that's been actually probably a strength for you to be able to be.

33:25 Oh, that's what I tell myself like no excuses.

33:31 Whatever I'm going through.

33:36 We've we've always made it through whatever we've gone through. And so there's nothing that we can't handle even though it's still, you know, still ongoing and

33:55 So but

33:58 I'm just really grateful.

34:07 To always

34:10 Being there

34:16 But you know that I am the one who has been grateful for your strength for your courage for your faith for your just saying hey like you say, what are we going to do now? How are we going to get through this and standing up and giving getting through all these things that we've gone through and it has made an incredibly they talked about how there's no deeper relationship between a mother or then the mother and son relationship but the relationship between you and I because of the things that we've gone through together is so much deeper than I think

35:04 Many other

35:09 Mother-son relationships

35:14 Always been

35:19 Play privilege to be your mom and

35:26 To be a part of it getting through these things like say waking up the next day and saying, okay, we've got another day together.

35:38 That's what I'm always so grateful for you doing things that are amazing graduating from college or doing things like your internship and designing and getting out there and showing people through your blogs and other social media how you are living life and getting out there and not feeling sorry for yourself.

36:07 Animal pork for me. I'm going through all this know, it's look at me. I have gone through all this for what I'm doing is living life and loving it.

36:43 You are amazing.

36:59 I just

37:03 I just don't want you know.

37:07 If you know something does happen to me to feel like

37:13 I gave up to feel like I didn't do everything that I could.

37:23 Vertigo after my dreams to love the people in my life.

37:30 To be grateful

37:33 For the little things for the big things.

37:40 I remember making it my goal.

37:46 With Heavenly Father

37:49 But I will never give up.

37:52 If he never gives up.

37:55 And so we're still here. So I feel like he hasn't given up on me yet. So I got to keep going.

38:08 It's helped so much to have everybody else.

38:15 We have had amazing people friend.

38:22 To the whole experience

38:27 Amazing

38:30 Hearts

38:33 Big heart

38:40 I think that's the other thing that's been so incredible is you don't realize

38:45 Until you go through something like this. Just help.

38:50 Big people's hearts are and how many people are there wanting to help?

38:58 Giving a meal or something.

39:06 See it all the time. And now we experienced it feel it and know that we give

39:17 I like coming up to this graduation from school and everything. Like it's always now looking back thinking of how many people it took to get me to this point. And I everybody always talks about how old Bruce you're so strong and you're sticking with it and you're doing it and and I always think there's no way I could have done it without all of these other people like everybody rides to school rides from the hospital to the ER homework teachers that have helped other students and faculty and there's hundreds of people.

40:06 Who?

40:10 Do you wish you could just take each part? In fact, let me know how much appreciated because you went through the darkest times while you were still in school and like every semester she was like, okay one semester brain surgery one semester heart surgery one semester radiation one semester chemotherapy, you know, it is just like, okay. What's what's going to be this semester's little

40:42 Health Adventure

40:46 But

40:48 I know but we have so many people that.

40:56 That's another big reason of why I keep doing what I'm doing is.

41:06 I would feel.

41:09 Like I was being extremely ungrateful if I didn't complete my degree if I didn't go after, you know these design jobs if I didn't try to

41:22 Work hard and

41:25 B+ and things like that because I feel like people have sacrificed time and money.

41:35 For me and you and to help us out and

41:42 I would just not feel right. If I in the NSAID, I don't want to do this anymore and just give up and that's just

41:55 I'm in love. It's just not us.

42:02 But don't work going for the Gusto again. I love you.

42:21 Together The Good The Bad and everything has been

42:27 Set to learning experience for me as a mom. I never thought I would.

42:36 Things like this

42:42 Norris hot moms are just

42:44 Long to braise kids but I feel like you're the kid that has raised his mom.

42:58 To be a better person to be a better Mom. No one ever thought egg.

43:33 I feel like I should end with a joke.

43:42 Wonder Woman

43:45 Part of our journey together

43:53 I have one question for clarity church. Is it the cheaper?

43:58 It's the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints also known as the Mormons.

44:06 Is there anything else you'd like to add before we close? Just again kind of I just want to?

44:17 Reiterate living with no excuses, you know really just enjoying and loving life.

44:26 Hello always grateful.

44:30 To do that with you and that our faith has been strengthened in.

44:39 Increase so many times and I can't say tenfold a hundred fold.

44:46 It's just become almost like the chair that were sitting in it. So real.

44:55 Strength that we've gotten from the church and from people.

45:00 Again, we can stay friends at school.

45:03 It's General people life is a blessing when you are in a situation where you need help and people.

45:18 Bring out the you bring out the best.

45:28 Not having had to go through it.

45:33 Experience that

45:37 We could write a book.

45:41 Minut little details or the big things have happened driving through Europe together singing songs.

45:53 Everything

45:57 That's what I'm always very grateful for our the big things obviously, but a little thing seen it.

46:09 Just the time being together.

46:19 And I'm just become more appreciative of time with people, you know friends family.

46:33 Appreciate time you appreciate life. But no we appreciate life so much more.

46:41 Then I ever did ever thought I could before.

46:53 Beautiful scars

47:04 I've got lots of stories.

47:14 Okay.