Moury Khan and Kasia Gumowski

[00:02] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Okay, so I'm Kasia Gamowski. I am 27 years old. Today is April 5, 2022, and I am currently in Waltham, Massachusetts. My conversational partner is Maury Khan, and we've been besties since 6th grade.

[00:28] MAURY KHAN: We. I realized that 16 years.

[00:32] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, geez.

[00:34] MAURY KHAN: I know, I know.

[00:36] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I didn't even count back that far. I didn't.

[00:38] MAURY KHAN: I didn't, I didn't. I counted back last night, I was talking to you, and I was like, you know, how long have I been friends with her? And I realized it's 16 years of friendship.

[00:49] KASIA GAMOWSKI: That's really, really long. Oh, my God.

[00:51] MAURY KHAN: Yeah.

[00:52] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Wow. But, hey, clearly something's working out. Like, if we can make it this long for friendship, honestly, how many friends have you gone through in the last couple years?

[01:03] MAURY KHAN: I don't have a lot of friends.

[01:05] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Clearly too many. Same here.

[01:09] MAURY KHAN: Oh. I am Maury I am also 27, and today is Tuesday, April 5, 2022, and I am in Brooklyn, New York. My conversation partner is Kasia Gamowski and like you said, my best friend from 6th grade.

[01:31] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's been a long time. A long time. 16 years of doing weird stuff together.

[01:39] MAURY KHAN: Also think. Okay. Just thinking back to how we met. So do you want to.

[01:45] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Okay. Yeah. So I was always the weird kid and also always the new kid. So my entire childhood, I pretty much bounced from school to school almost every year for, like, four or five years. So I ended up at St. Hedwig's school in Naugus, Hook.

[02:07] MAURY KHAN: It's no longer there.

[02:09] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, yeah, no, no, that. That's gone. But that's a different story. But, yeah, no. So I ended up in St. Hedwigs. And of course, me being the weird kid, and of course, needing to, you know, stand out, because every single time I bounced around, we went. I went to a new school with a whole bunch of kids. But St. Hedwigs, to my surprise, had ten kids in the class.

[02:33] MAURY KHAN: Literally eight girls and two boys. Do you ever think about that?

[02:38] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, it's, um. Well, I realized I never learned how to talk to boys because of it.

[02:43] MAURY KHAN: So there it was, such a small school that they combined fifth and 6th grade. And I, to this day, think back to it and think about all the money that our parents poured into that school for us to have a subpar education. Not to say it was subpar, but it's like when you're learning at a reading level with fifth graders versus 6th graders, that's a lot of damage as a educational process.

[03:09] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It definitely is. But at the same time, they kind of just let me do my own thing because I was a weirdo, so they just let me read in the corner.

[03:16] MAURY KHAN: You're also, like, very ahead of your reading.

[03:19] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's true.

[03:21] MAURY KHAN: Like, you're reading at a high school level. I feel like at that point, I was.

[03:27] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I was. You know, I could just read books, but that's fine. But, yeah, no, being the, like, child that I was, I was like, all right, gotta make sure I stand out. Like, cool. New school knew me great. Except not really a new me. Um, but it was going to be my birthday later on that month, and I was at home Depot and my mom bought me a Venus flytrap because, of course, I begged for a Venus flytrap. And, um, you know who doesn't bring their new pet Venus fly trap to school on the first day? Starting out a new school?

[04:03] MAURY KHAN: Wait, my. Okay, I have so many questions about that. I was thinking about it. I was like, did you come into school thinking, like, I don't know, like, why leave a splash off? Like, you know, like, maybe like a water bottle or a toy, but you can't get the full plant.

[04:20] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Why not?

[04:21] MAURY KHAN: That's true. That's fair.

[04:23] KASIA GAMOWSKI: More. You remember how weird I was at that point. I did not have that thought process. Like, I was like, cool plant that. Eat bug. Got it. Nice. So, of course, you know, you go into a new school, there's only ten kids in your class. You walk in with a little plant, and you're like, oh, yeah, I'm going to be the cool kidde. No. Maury was the only nice kid.

[04:48] MAURY KHAN: Again, I don't. Okay, was I nice? But was I also really weird? Both.

[04:56] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Definitely both. You didn't give me a funny look. How about that?

[05:03] MAURY KHAN: Because it was a. It was a plant that ate bugs. That was so cool.

[05:07] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. And of course, that's why we ended up, like, in the play yard out on lunch break or, like, recess or whatever.

[05:15] MAURY KHAN: It was literally a parking lot. They tried to tell us that was, like, the playground. There was. There was a broken basketball hoop. There were no basketballs. I don't know. We had to bring in our own basketballs to play.

[05:25] KASIA GAMOWSKI: There was a hopscotch thing. That's close enough, right?

[05:28] MAURY KHAN: They like. Do you remember what they read at the parking lot? And that was gone. Yeah, like the parking lot. They said, go play, and we're like.

[05:36] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Okay, well, it was fine at the time. Nobody really questioned it. I mean, at least it's one less thing for the school to do. They didn't have to mow the lawn. But they did have two weirdos collecting bugs to feed to a plant. So true.

[05:50] MAURY KHAN: The first day that we met, we were at recess, and we were collecting bugs that we were finding, and we were feeding it to the Venus fly crab, and I was, my mind was blown. I was like, a plant that eats bugs.

[06:03] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. Actually, did you even know I still collect carnivorous plants?

[06:08] MAURY KHAN: There's more plants. Like that girl.

[06:11] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I have, like, four nepenthes right next to me. But I'm not. That's a different story. Hold on. Okay. Um, yeah, so my tiny little carnivorous plant, I don't know if you could see him, but yeah, yeah, that one is like a tiny little pitcher plant, but yeah. No. Back to the story of our friendship and not my odd hobbies and collections. Honestly, saying, like, you know, gotta keep everything you need in hands reach. But you never know when you need a plant to eat a bug. But yeah, no, you were, like, the nicest person ever to actually, like, talk to me and, like, hang out with me. And, like, I think the fact that you were so non judgmental was so nice. Like, that was very refreshing. Kids that age, kids are not nice. Middle school is mean, terrible. You a godsend.

[07:10] MAURY KHAN: But, you know, I think back to it, and I feel like 6th grade was the year that I just turned into this horrible kid. Because I specifically remember our 6th grade teacher, Miss Jakes, and she was literally the nicest woman ever. But we just, like, I don't know, as kids, we bullied her.

[07:25] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Miss Jakes, if you're out there listening, we're sorry. We've had conversations about this. We are very sorry.

[07:31] MAURY KHAN: I think back to it, and I, I think about my AmeriCorps experience. So you know how I taught in a classroom when I was in Americorps, and, like, there were times where my kids were being so horrible. And, like, in front of the classroom while I'm teaching, I'm literally having a mental breakdown. But at the same time, I'm, like, teaching, I'm, like, writing on the board or whatever, and in my head, I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, this is my karma for what a horrible kid I was to miss Jakes. Because thinking back, like, all the science experiments that we did on all, like, the creativity that went into our classroom and, like, with the lack of resources that she had, we had a really, like, fun experience being in school.

[08:08] KASIA GAMOWSKI: We really did. Do you remember back when we had to make those dioramas?

[08:15] MAURY KHAN: Yes. That was, like, the epitome, like, chef's kiss of, like, our art, like, our.

[08:23] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Art skills come in, culminating with our science interest finally.

[08:27] MAURY KHAN: And then, like, do you remember we, like, made the safari and we had, we had to make a safari and, like, we wanted to kind of emphasize on how sunny and warm it is. So we, like, cut out a hole and we didn't tell anyone what that hole was for in the box. And then we thought it was like the coolest, like, most creative, most innovative thing to, like, stick a flashlight in that hole with covered in, like, tissue paper to, like, make it like a bright sun in our dia. In our diorama. Diarrhea. Not diagram. Diorama.

[08:56] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Diorama. Yes. No, honestly, that was great. A plus for us.

[09:01] MAURY KHAN: That was so creative. And I remember, oh, my gosh, like, all the fun art projects that we did and then that eventually led us in the 8th grade to be voted most, most artistic.

[09:11] KASIA GAMOWSKI: They couldn't pick between, you know, all ten kids. They had to clump us together. Clearly. Best friends, same people for the rest of our lives.

[09:20] MAURY KHAN: I feel like every time we connect, it's always me randomly reaching out to the, like, out of the blue. Like, I fall off the face of the earth, like, doing whatever I'm doing. And like three years later, I reappear and I send you a screenshot of something I found on Pinterest. And I'm like, do you think we can do this?

[09:37] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Literally? Yes. And the only time I ever reach out is when I have a, like, I occasionally just dream of people. And whenever I have a dream of you, I'm like, oh, gosh, I guess the universe is saying I have to say hi to Maury All right. Hi, Maury. I just follow it.

[09:54] MAURY KHAN: That doesn't happen as often. It used to happen, like, earlier in college, but it doesn't happen anymore.

[09:59] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Ah, yeah. I mean, you know, adulthood doesn't have.

[10:03] MAURY KHAN: A lot of sleep, I guess.

[10:04] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It doesn't, it doesn't. It's not very kind to us.

[10:08] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my gosh, I. Do you remember, like, when we were younger, how we wanted to grow up so fast? Like, I remember when we were in, like, I know this is something that I said that we can't really talk about. Do you remember? But when we were in the 6th grade, we were like, upset. We were discovering music and what we like. And then do you remember, like, how big the warped tour was when we were growing up?

[10:26] KASIA GAMOWSKI: And girl, I went to that for eight years straight.

[10:30] MAURY KHAN: I begged, I begged my mom, and my mom was like, literally like, no, you're never going to this. And honestly, now that I think back to it, I'm so glad you don't let me go because I feel like there's so many problematic stories that come out of it. You didn't have problematic stories, but for, like, the most part, it was just.

[10:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Like, you know, I had problematic stories. I just kept them quiet, you know? I knew better than to tell my mother.

[10:53] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my God. Yeah, no, my mom. The funny thing is my mom didn't. Like, my mom didn't really hear about those stories. It was more like. I don't know. I don't know if you remember growing up. My mom always, like, to this day, she still works in the little sandwich shop. And it's like, I remember growing up, like, I always resent my mom because I couldn't do extracurricular activities like soccer or even be picked up for early dismissal. I always go to your house after school because your mom picked you up after school?

[11:24] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. Or we just walked there, too. We walked home a couple times.

[11:29] MAURY KHAN: Oh, yeah. You live, like, right by the school.

[11:31] KASIA GAMOWSKI: That's true. Five minute walk.

[11:33] MAURY KHAN: I remember, like, in this. Like, I just remember going to your house after school because my mom couldn't pick me up. And for the longest time, I resented her for it. But I don't know. I now feel guilty for almost resenting her because it was like she was doing her best. She was working and she was trying to give the most, but at the same time, she didn't have time to tote us around. And I feel like that was the year my sister went to high school and you came into St. Hedwigs. And I remember spending a lot of time with you just because I was convenient. It was convenient, yes. But also, like, we just had so much in common.

[12:13] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's true.

[12:14] MAURY KHAN: Like, little weird.

[12:15] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Do you remember the first time you came over my house?

[12:17] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my God, yes, yes.

[12:20] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. No, I remember you were absolutely terrified of dogs. And I, of course, the owner of a tiny, white, fluffy bichon. Ella was the best. Ella was the absolute best if you ever had. But the first time you came over, all I remember is you freaking out because somebody opened the door and Ella came running out.

[12:47] MAURY KHAN: She, Usain bolted at me like it was.

[12:50] KASIA GAMOWSKI: She was excited to meet you, honestly.

[12:55] MAURY KHAN: Also, I was like a tiny kid. Like, I was like, it's a good.

[12:59] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Thing you were because you launched yourself off of my, like, porch, and if you weren't a tiny kid, you would have broken something, but instead you just tumble rolled.

[13:08] MAURY KHAN: I literally. I remember your deck was like. It was on stilts and you had, like, a little area underneath it, and I remember jumping off of it because I was so scared. And then, like, Ella being a little speed demon that she is, she came running down and chased me. Even, like, more. Even if I was, like, injured, I think I would have kept running. I was so terrified for my. I was, like, fighting for my life.

[13:31] KASIA GAMOWSKI: From a tiny, little fluffy dog.

[13:33] MAURY KHAN: Honestly, from my perspective, that was horrifying.

[13:39] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Well, I'm glad. I'm glad that I could have been a part of that. You know, gotta. You know, are you. Are you friends if you don't give your friends trauma? Like, honestly?

[13:50] MAURY KHAN: Very fair. Very fair. I, like, you know, I have, like, PTSd. Whenever I see, like, heavy eyeliner, like, the euphoria look, I'm just like, oh, no, 8th grade.

[14:06] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's coming back to haunt us.

[14:08] MAURY KHAN: But the thing is, like, I think it's pretty. I think it's cool. But then I look at it, and I'm just like. I have flashback. I have, like, more flashbacks to, like, the good old days, experimenting with our makeup, and then, like, do you remember how, since it was, like, a catholic school, everyone, we would get in trouble and they would make us wash it off?

[14:27] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, I was gonna say they didn't really let us wear makeup. I think you could maybe get away with, like, one coat of mascara, and you were only allowed to do, like, clear nail polish.

[14:37] MAURY KHAN: I remember you, like, used to smoke out your eyes because we were, like, really into, like, that.

[14:42] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yes, I did.

[14:43] MAURY KHAN: Raccoon. Look. We were into that. And I remember you never got called out because you swooped your bangs in front of your face, because it was also that era.

[14:54] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I was a smart kid. I was a smart kid, you know? Like, if you're afraid to get caught, just swoop. It's fine. But, I mean, you know, the era of the swoopy bang was also. I don't remember. I don't know if you remember. There was, like, a period of, like, several months where I only wore headbands. My mom accidentally gave me. Where my mom accidentally gave me baby bangs because, of course, when I was, like, getting my, like, bangs cut, you know, your eyebrows are here, but mine were here, so I had bangs that were, like, a half an inch above my eyebrows. And I actually have a picture day photo in a headband because I had accidentally gotten baby bang.

[15:45] MAURY KHAN: I don't remember. Was that in St. Hedwig? Because I never.

[15:48] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It was. No, it was. And that is actually why I ended up growing out my swoopy bangs, because I was traumatized from having accidental baby bangs.

[15:59] MAURY KHAN: You know, it's a look. It was a whole look.

[16:01] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, oh, yeah. And thank God it was in the style at that point.

[16:05] MAURY KHAN: Like, we have a question. Did your mom let you walk out the house with makeup on?

[16:12] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yes, yes, most of the time. As long as I didn't look terrible. She was like, it's fine. But then again, my mom also let me dye my hair pink in the 8th grade.

[16:24] MAURY KHAN: Dye your hair pink?

[16:25] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, during the summers. It was like one of those dummy permanents. Yeah, I had a pink, long, long pink hair in the summer of 8th grade and I think in the summer of 7th grade, actually. Yeah. Like right before 8th grade, she let me dye my hair pink.

[16:40] MAURY KHAN: Wait, you mentioned summer of 8th grade? You mentioned summer of 8th grade. And I'm going to bring up a really traumatic memory that like I carried for the entire summer.

[16:50] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh gosh, I might have repressed it. What is it?

[16:53] MAURY KHAN: What do you remember? During recess, Caitlin was doing like backflips on the asshole and then she like lost her ring. She like handed it to us and like, she was still doing backflips. And I guess when you returned it.

[17:07] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Like vaguely, but like, I remember that.

[17:11] MAURY KHAN: And like ruined my entire summer. I was like, oh no, I like, and she was like, I don't know how I found out because I don't think, I, I don't think texting was. We didn't have phones at that point.

[17:21] KASIA GAMOWSKI: No, I had a flip phone. I do remember having a flip phone.

[17:25] MAURY KHAN: I remember getting.

[17:27] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, that.

[17:29] MAURY KHAN: Remember that?

[17:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh yeah, I know, you're right.

[17:31] MAURY KHAN: Do you remember? And then so she lost her ring. And I remember I was so sad during the summer. I'm like, oh no, she's in trouble with her mom because it was like, I don't know, it was like valuable family heirloom. And like, also, why are you letting an eleven year old wear valuable heirloom to school?

[17:47] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, I was gonna say like, I don't know, I didn't get the fancy rings until like high school. Why would you let a child wear a fancy ring?

[17:57] MAURY KHAN: I remember that and I felt so bad that summer. I was like, Caitlin's probably sitting grounded this summer.

[18:04] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, I'm sure it's fine.

[18:06] MAURY KHAN: She's living her best life now. She's an Aruba. I saw a Facebook post. The rare moments I look.

[18:11] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, okay, good for her. You know what? Good for her. I don't, I don't check in on anybody anymore except for like you. I feel like we've lost contact with everybody from middle school. Granted, there were only, like, eight other people.

[18:30] MAURY KHAN: I know. I don't know. I. Yeah, middle school was weird. We only had ten kids in our class. But I keep in touch with you, Lauren. Of course, we're going through that little tip right now. But I still love her. You, Lauren? I used to keep in touch with Alessandra, but not anymore. I actually reached out to Michael before the pandemic.

[18:56] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Huh. I saw her working at, like, an ice cream shop at some point, and I was like, I think I know you.

[19:04] MAURY KHAN: She was getting her masters. Now she's an accountant in Stanford. Good for her.

[19:09] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Honestly, that's all. That's it.

[19:12] MAURY KHAN: She was always like. I always knew she was going to be a math whiz.

[19:16] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Well, she was in that special kids like math. Remember that? Where they pulled out, like, three or four kids to do algebra in the 8th grade?

[19:25] MAURY KHAN: I remember that. They were doing high school math, and they were so cool.

[19:28] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I know.

[19:29] MAURY KHAN: Christine and Michaela.

[19:33] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. It's weird how clicky things were in a. In, like, a class of ten.

[19:39] MAURY KHAN: I know. Then we got high school, and it was like a reality check.

[19:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah.

[19:44] MAURY KHAN: Because all the kids that were mean to us in elementary school, they got, like, a severe reality check. And I was like, good thing.

[19:55] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I was already used to being the weird one. That was always new. So, like, ha. I got the advantage.

[20:03] MAURY KHAN: So I remember freshman year, I went to a different high school, and then I transferred in sophomore year because I hated Chase. I did not want to go to chase.

[20:11] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I remember that. I missed you that entire freshman year.

[20:14] MAURY KHAN: I feel like we didn't talk through high school, though. We had, like, different friend groups.

[20:18] KASIA GAMOWSKI: We, like, occasionally did, but, like, not too often.

[20:22] MAURY KHAN: We, like, said hi to each other and then. Yeah, I feel like it's not that we drifted apart. It was just like we were hanging out with different people.

[20:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: You were in the choir. I was in the art department.

[20:33] MAURY KHAN: I didn't talk to anyone in choir. I feel like. So this goes back to, like, why I originally became friends with you. But I feel like prior to you coming in, and it wasn't because I felt unwelcome. Like, I. Again, I've known Lauren since the first class, and I remember still, there was a part of it where I was uncomfortable sharing my cultural aspect of it. But when you came in to 6th grade, I was. You were so proudly polish, and I loved how you celebrated your culture, and it felt like one of those things that, like, you are unapologetically your culture and why can't I be unapologetic in my culture? So, like, I really appreciate that about you.

[21:18] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. I mean, you know, you got to celebrate who you are and where you've come from and what struggles your family has gone through to get you there. You know, immigrant parents. Right.

[21:31] MAURY KHAN: And you know what's really funny? So do you remember how you. Okay. Your partner, John? I actually knew John before you. I've known him since I. He briefly went to third. He went to St. Headways before you did. And he was in the third and fourth grade, and then he went to public school. But he mentioned this one story. My big memory of John is him in that yellow jacket all the time, and he wouldn't put his arms through the jacket. Honestly, I feel like John is who he was in the third grade, which is, like, great because he was just this wholesome, nice guy. But I remember stand in front of me because they used to alphabetically align us in the line, and he was in front of me because his last name's G. And then there was, like, there's, like, no one in between G and K. And that's why we got.

[22:21] KASIA GAMOWSKI: To stand in line together, right? Oh, besties forever.

[22:26] MAURY KHAN: Gee. Yeah, but, yeah, no, he stood in front of me, and then he always used to like. So our teacher was this military guy. He actually passed away when we were in the 8th or the 6th grade. Actually, he passed away. And I remember that Mister carpenter. He was. He was a really nice man, but he was, like, so funny. Like, do you know some of those people where you're like. Like, as an adult, I look at it, and I'm like, you shouldn't be working with kids? Yes, he's definitely one of them. And. But he was a great guy. He wasn't a bad guy. He was just, like, very, like, kids were scared of him. Maybe he should be working with kids. Who knows? Kids.

[23:02] KASIA GAMOWSKI: But sometimes they need a little structure, right?

[23:05] MAURY KHAN: Yeah. Like, make us, like, line up in the line. He used to have us put, like, an arm with. To, like, have personal space. And then every time we would come back from recess, he's like, john was in front of me, and then he would like. Of course, like, kids were running around, and then. So he would, like, he would have his jacket, and he would hang the hood off his head. And then this one time, he sneezed, and he had, like, a string of boogers, and I was so grossed out. And he was, like, standing like this, like, with his arm, like, held out in his face, and it was just like. And that was like my vague memory of him. And then also, I said this last night, but another traumatic memory in third grade. I'm just reading. This is like a therapy session.

[23:50] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, yeah, absolutely. And I always love hearing more stories about my partner.

[23:55] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my God. Yeah. No, another traumatic story was when Jordan from high school, we went to high school with him.

[24:01] KASIA GAMOWSKI: He was in my french class, so.

[24:03] MAURY KHAN: Okay, so I had. Okay, so I was like a tiny kid because I just, I don't know what was wrong. I was just tiny. And I remember I was unpacking my rolly backpack because I couldn't carry a backpack.

[24:15] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Love the merly backpacks.

[24:17] MAURY KHAN: And then one morning, I was like, he sat next to me and I was like, unpacking my books into my little sliding desk. And then he, like, vomits in my backpack. And the first thing he said was, I see corn. And I wanted to scream. And then Jonathan's in the back laughing. He's like, haha, that's so funny. And I'm just like, I'm looking around, I'm just like, this is, this is like a worst case scenario. Somebody literally just puked in my backpack. But anyways, that was my memory of John. But, like, going back to his memory of me, he mentioned that, like, this one time, I remember this too. My. So this is like something that makes me a little, like, I'm so appreciative of my mom and I'm appreciative of my culture. But this is kind of like a traumatic memory because, like, whenever there's something of, like, the south asian culture that pops up, they used to call my mom in there, like, and would ask to share our culture. And it all, like, I love it. And it was like, it was from a great place where they wanted to expose these kids from. From a certain culture, but it just felt like, I felt like a zoo animal, almost like I knew I was different and I didn't want to highlight the fact that I was different.

[25:26] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's exactly like when people ask me to speak polish to prove that I could speak polish because I'm polish, you.

[25:34] MAURY KHAN: Know, it's, it's, it's hard. I'm sorry, I need to do that so many times.

[25:40] KASIA GAMOWSKI: But, yeah, no, continue with your story.

[25:42] MAURY KHAN: No, I was just like, yeah, no, that was like one of the things. But also, I remember this one time, my mom came into fourth grade and she, like, let everyone wear saris. Like, she like, put a sari on them. And then, like, she also brought, like, a dish of, like, this this is called kichiri, which is, like, lentil beans and then, like, chick, like, loose pieces of chicken, and sometimes you get a little bone in there. And then John was saying how he found a bone in his. His. In his kitchen, and then he ended up keeping that for, like, years on his windowsill. And, like, I didn't find out about this until the other day when he told us.

[26:18] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. Yeah.

[26:21] MAURY KHAN: That was really. I honestly. Honestly, my mom was like, gross.

[26:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Your mom is the best, though. I remember when they. You know how I don't remember if it was, like, 6th or 7th grade, but they made us do that, like, you know, pick one of your cultures and explore it or whatever.

[26:43] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my God.

[26:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: We had the option of, like, polish or Bengali culture. I'm like, you know what? No. Bangladesh has so much to offer. Like, what do I have? Pierogi. All right.

[26:54] MAURY KHAN: Cool.

[26:58] KASIA GAMOWSKI: And nutritious. But, you know, but that was, like, the absolute best because I got to go over your parents house. And, you know, we would just. We did a dance routine to bullet Chudian. I still remember the song. I can still sing it and remember steps. Half of them. Yeah, I do. It was the best. And it was so fun because, you know, we got to get all dressed up like you had your. Sorry I had to wear your mom because, of course, my. I was a tad chunky.

[27:35] MAURY KHAN: You know, I was wearing a lihenga, not a sari.

[27:39] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Pardon me? I'm sorry.

[27:41] MAURY KHAN: You're wearing a sailor.

[27:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I'm sorry. I did not remember what I was wearing. All I remember is I was pretty in pink. All I know is I was pretty in pink and gold, and I was like, this is the best thing ever.

[27:55] MAURY KHAN: I was looking for that picture, and I actually found it, and I was.

[27:59] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Like, I think it was on, like, Facebook, right?

[28:01] MAURY KHAN: Oh, no, I don't think I was, like, really good about, like, until recently, I don't think I was like. And I say recently, like, until, like, maybe after I graduated college that was fully comfortable with my culture.

[28:15] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Well, I mean, we should definitely, you know, definitely send me that. That photo, and we should definitely relive that momentous. We could have, like, I felt so.

[28:26] MAURY KHAN: Grown in that moment because my mom. Okay, so, you know, my mom is, like, three shades lighter than me, and my mom was so excited because that was the first time that I kind of, like, showed interest in my culture because that was the first year that I was kind of, like, comfortable with it.

[28:38] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah.

[28:39] MAURY KHAN: And she put, like. She was so excited. She put makeup on me, and I was like, oh, my God, I'm such a grown. I'm a grown woman. This is what it feels like. And I remember her putting her makeup on me, and I was, like, so excited, and, like, I look back at that picture, and I'm just like, who's corpse? Like, in addition to, like, them, not like. Like, the makeup industry. Not making makeup for women of color back in the day. And my mom struggled with that. And it's, like, on my skin, like, I just.

[29:11] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I struggle from the start, but that was, like, the best day ever. Like, I loved performing that on stage. That was a great little stage.

[29:21] MAURY KHAN: You mean lunch tables? Because our school was too portal for it stations?

[29:24] KASIA GAMOWSKI: No, we had a stage.

[29:26] MAURY KHAN: It was a stage, but they, like, extended it with, like, lunch tables because there was no light. They couldn't afford to replace the light bulbs.

[29:35] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Good enough. Again, what we said, you know, fed school struggled, but they provided. You know, honestly, that place was great.

[29:45] MAURY KHAN: It was. But, Ripley, you know, I'm so sad you weren't there for mistain your ears. First of all, let me tell you what a godsend angel that woman was like when I first came. So prior to, like, this is pre Kasha.

[30:04] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Pre Kasha.

[30:05] MAURY KHAN: Prior to you coming into St. Hedwigs, I remember my. My. My dad. My dad was in America for a little bit, but we lived in Bangladesh for, like, the first six years of my life. Like, I was born in America, but, like, six months I went to Bangladesh. And then, like, we came back here. And then, like, my. We got enrolled in St. Hedwigs. And Miss Daner was so nice to my parents, and I didn't realize what that meant to my parents because she was just so nice, so patient, so understanding. And she never made us feel like we were different or, like, different from the other kids. And I feel like I didn't realize, like, by the time I was in the 6th grade, I was just, like, some reckless little kid that was just, like, yelling, screaming. But I feel like later in life, I kind of felt that my culture prompted people to treat me differently. And it was really strange seeing it from adults. And I've seen teachers treat me differently because I was a person of color or, like. But my time in St. Hedwig's, Miss Danner, made that transition so easy. And I'm so sad you didn't get to experience her.

[31:25] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. You know, I always heard great things. I think I met her once at, like, our school carnival, maybe. I think she came back for a visit, but, like. Yeah, no, I always heard great things. But, you know, she was, you got me when you did.

[31:43] MAURY KHAN: I did. Yeah. I actually, she added me on Facebook like randomly, like three years ago.

[31:48] KASIA GAMOWSKI: That's amazing. She, oh, also, sidebar, do you know what's going on with misses Stack? Because I haven't heard of her in like years.

[31:57] MAURY KHAN: Like, I think she retired.

[31:59] KASIA GAMOWSKI: She's like, oh, good for her.

[32:01] MAURY KHAN: I see her commenting on people's posts when they're having babies and congratulations.

[32:05] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, okay. Okay, cool. I just wanted to check up because like, you know, we always got a shout out to all of our teachers. Misses stack, we still care.

[32:12] MAURY KHAN: Yeah, she, I was, she took the time out to teach me math.

[32:21] KASIA GAMOWSKI: She did that to me too. I actually ended up going back to her in high school. I needed tutoring in algebra. I went back to St. Hedwig's after school and she tutored me in algebra like just for free because she was like, you know what? I'm not letting my students fail even if they don't go to my school, nor are they my students anymore. That's why I'm like, you know what, misses Stack, you the real Og. Like, she's the best.

[32:50] MAURY KHAN: I remember she used to tutor me and because I was so bad at math and I started going to her after school, she would like, stay after school and like give me one on one tutoring. And I started doing well. Like, I think at that point I started to learn my learning style, growing. I definitely, like, I definitely had a learning disability growing up. I'm not gonna, oh, yeah. Shy away from that. But, like, not learning disability, but like.

[33:15] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh yeah, the different style of doing things.

[33:20] MAURY KHAN: Yeah, but I had, I remember she just walked me through and it just made my life so much easier. And I started to enjoy school again. And it was just very, it was very nice. And she was such a nice woman.

[33:34] KASIA GAMOWSKI: You know, one of my favorite things about her is I was, you remember how I was a sickly child and there was always something wrong with me, right?

[33:41] MAURY KHAN: Oh my gosh, you had like laryngitis for like six months.

[33:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Always. Oh, by the way, I got my tonsils removed like three years ago. So like, ooh, to me, we did.

[33:51] MAURY KHAN: Catch up on that one.

[33:52] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. But I remember, like, I don't remember why they had me go get a blood test, but I remember I got a blood test and my cholesterol was high and I was like, I'm in the 7th grade, how can I have high cholesterol? And misses stack and me, we would just sit and eat cheerios. We're like, yeah, we're getting our cholesterol down together.

[34:16] MAURY KHAN: Misses staff. Oh, my gosh. Do you remember when she tripped and then she, like, broke her tooth and then she had gotten. That was so sad. Like, it made me so sad.

[34:28] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. Well, I hope she's doing well in life. She deserves.

[34:33] MAURY KHAN: She does. She was great. 8th grade was. I was scared of her growing up, though. I definitely was.

[34:41] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, I did too. I actually always, like, had many panic attacks because I was terrified of her. And I always, my palms were always super, super sweaty going into her classes. I don't remember. I remember, like, in fifth or 6th, it was like 6th grade. We were, like, switching off classes. I don't know if she, like, taught different subjects or something. I don't really remember what was going on there, but I remember always, like, whenever we went there, I was like, I was like, super, super nervous. I was like, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. I'm gonna, I'm going to, like, do something wrong and she's going to yell at me, but, like, you know, worth it. She was great.

[35:20] MAURY KHAN: I like, I think about my work style now, and, like, I remember I was so anxious because Mississippi was so structured. And, like, as I get older, like, I live my life like, I do my finances on excel sheets. I, I just like, do, like, I like to have sense of order and I think back to it and I'm just like, misses staff did this to me. Like, there are certain times where I'm, like, spending time alphabetizing things that shouldn't be alphabetized. I alphabetize, like, little packets of tea the other day.

[35:52] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, that sounds like something you do. It was like, it's weird how much a tiny little school could really influence us so much for the rest of our lives. And we can really see it, like, you know, in our day to day lives for the rest of our lives.

[36:13] MAURY KHAN: I, it's unbelievable. And like, I think little weird kinks that I have, like, little behavioral things and it's like, I don't know, it's, it's, it's amazing that St. Hedwigs was able to have such an impact while only being there in for what, like four years. Did spend a lot of time. Never mind. I digress.

[36:41] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah. I mean, like, once we got in, once my family got in there, we got really involved. Do you remember my mom making the french fries? And every year for Halloween, her dressing up as a witch? Yeah, with her big nose.

[36:55] MAURY KHAN: I don't remember the hat.

[36:58] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I still have the hat and the cape.

[37:00] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my gosh. Yes. I remember that you were. You. Your family was very involved with the school because it was a polish church.

[37:07] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, it was. It was. I think that's also why I was so open about being like, you know, polish. I'm like, all right, these peeps is my peeps.

[37:15] MAURY KHAN: But you're literally the only polish kid.

[37:17] KASIA GAMOWSKI: In our class I know. Who'd have thunk, you know, going to the entire, like, polish church there the entire time. I think there'd be like, no, wait.

[37:25] MAURY KHAN: No, no.

[37:25] KASIA GAMOWSKI: There was Joey Demkowski. He's in Poland now. He moved there.

[37:29] MAURY KHAN: No way.

[37:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, no, he was in a great. The great above, but, yeah, he moved there a while ago. He moved back to Poland. I think his mom is here now, though. Hmm.

[37:41] MAURY KHAN: I can't imagine him in Poland. I feel like he was, like, the.

[37:43] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Most, like, oh, no, it's. It's a great place. He's having fun. He lives in a vacation town now, so, like, good for him.

[37:52] MAURY KHAN: We got to connect about this later.

[37:54] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Oh, yeah, absolutely. We'll chat afterwards. What? I don't remember.

[38:00] MAURY KHAN: Everyone had a crush on.

[38:02] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Well, they were like, there was, like, two boys, and then there's the great above us. Yeah, there we go. But, yeah, no, that's a great time.

[38:15] MAURY KHAN: I feel like there's so much more to unpack about our friendship. I talk like, we talk about it, and then I remember there's so, like. And that's just, like, only one sliver of our life. That's literally just, like, maybe two years of our life.

[38:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Yeah, and there's a whole other 14 to unpack, apparently.

[38:36] MAURY KHAN: Oh, my God. I don't want to know what that conversation looks like.

[38:40] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It's going to be, like, a 13 hours conversation. At least.

[38:45] MAURY KHAN: We can unpackage that later tonight.

[38:47] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Perfect. I'll call you at, like, six.

[38:50] MAURY KHAN: Sounds good. We have in class today, so when?

[38:54] KASIA GAMOWSKI: Call me after class. It's fine.

[38:56] MAURY KHAN: I always enjoy reminiscing with you. That's one of my things.

[39:00] KASIA GAMOWSKI: I always put love putting you on speakerphone so John can, like, pipe in every so often, too.

[39:05] MAURY KHAN: I feel like he just hears the most unhinged things, like, just out of context.

[39:09] KASIA GAMOWSKI: So our entire relationship is unhinged to.

[39:11] MAURY KHAN: Honestly, I feel like that's just. It goes back to you picking bugs.

[39:20] KASIA GAMOWSKI: For my plants and you, like, jumping off of my deck because you're terrified of a dog.

[39:27] MAURY KHAN: Listen, I could have injured myself.

[39:30] KASIA GAMOWSKI: But you didn't, and that's the moral of the story. I tell the tale, and no one ever found out. And so you were still allowed to come to my house after school, I think.

[39:42] MAURY KHAN: Did your mom know?

[39:44] KASIA GAMOWSKI: You shouldn't tell your mom.

[39:46] MAURY KHAN: Wow. Naturally. No.

[39:49] KASIA GAMOWSKI: True. But, yeah. It was lovely talking to you, Maury my dear.

[39:55] MAURY KHAN: I know. Always fun catching up with you.

[39:58] KASIA GAMOWSKI: It really is. But, yeah. I have to get back to work. Love you.

[40:04] MAURY KHAN: Bye.