Randall Williams and Toccarra Williams

[00:06] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: My name is Randall S. Williams II. I'm 42 years old. Today's date is June 19, 2024. We're in Pittsburgh, PA, and I'm here with my lovely wife, Toccarra Williams.

[00:21] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Hello. My name is Toccarra Lynn Williams. I am 39 years old. Today is June 19, 2024. And today's special not just because it's juneteenth, but also our son's birthdays. Today we are here in Pittsburgh, PA, and I have the pleasure of being with Mia Moore, my husband, my partner in crime, and that's good crime, and my best friend, Randall. So I guess you all are wondering, how did we get here?

[01:01] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: That's a very interesting kind of complex question, but it's not because there was a lot of intricate details that went into where we are today and the person that I am today. And I think I would like to go. We gotta go back. We gotta go back to absolutely kind of the things that I've gone through personally that helped shape and mold who I am today. And a lot of it came from, you know, the love and the nurturing I got as a child. But once I became a young adult, some of the adverse situations that I put myself in based on the choices I made, and in those moments, they kind of felt, you know, painful. I wish they, you know, I wish they would hurry up and be over with. And it was kind of, you know, you know, burdensome. But today, those were some of the best moments, some of the best teachable moments, some of the best things that ever happened to me because it made me, you know, appreciate people. It made me appreciate life. It made me pay attention to detail, knowing that, you know, I must be accountable at all times. And I didn't get there overnight. I was, you know, one of the first people that would try to, you know, cut corners or try to speed up a process or, you know, only have my agenda at the forefront and not really care so much about, you know, how it affected other people. So just going, you know, through those things and having that mindset, it allowed me to have, you know, a perspective of two sides. I understand somebody that comes from that world and that background because that's a part of me. So I understand it. But I also, on the flip side, understand the damage that it causes and, you know, the casualties that, you know, that are created just based on those decisions and that mindset. And, you know, inevitably, it led me to prison for a long period of time. And I think the day. Not that I think the first day that I actually was rearrested for the second time at the end of trial. And I was placed in the holding cell not knowing what my fate was, not knowing how, you know, they perceived me or what type of, you know, punishment would be handed down to me. I think at that time, that's when the clock started ticking, you know, regarding a process of, you know, renewing who I am today. That's when it started. Because leading up to that point, there was no reason for me to stop doing what I was doing or change the way I was thinking or any, you know, anything like that. Because in my mind, it worked. So if it's not broke, there's no need to change it. There's no need to try to fix something that's working pretty well until it's not. And in that moment, that's when the reality really kicked in. And it was like, something has to change. I just didn't know that that something was me. I thought it was a lot of external things that needed to change around me. It was, this person needed to change. This thing needs to change. This person's mindset needs to change. And all of these things. I was looking outward until I was able to sit still long enough to look in the mirror, to recognize this is the thing that needs to change. And that was very intimidating because it was, in my opinion, it was easier for me to manipulate somebody else to change faster than it was for me to convince myself that it was me that needed to change. Because in my mind and in my eyes, I could do no wrong, even while doing wrong.

[06:21] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Right.

[06:24] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: So if this was a book, I just walked you through the. What is it, the prelude or the interlude of a book? And now that is where I would like to begin. Chapter one.

[06:47] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Wow.

[06:47] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: So how do you feel about what I said so far?

[06:53] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: I mean, I believe and feel that it is a true depiction of the foundation of building, Randall. Right. You had to go through those trials and tribulations to become the man that you are today. And without them, you and I are not sitting across from one another. Absolutely. You're not the living proof of peer and recovery support working, because you would have no evidence to show, you know, what it takes to go through something and then come out on the other side. And now use positive coping skills to manage your anger, frustration, you know, your hurt, your pain, your grief, your loss. So those situations had to happen in order for you and I to, one, meet each other, right? And two, for us to build off of the foundation that was already set in place before you and I even knew. So you know, I always tell my husband that I'm grateful, you know, for the things that he and I have gone through in the moment. We don't know why, right? And we're so, you know, upset and hurt and confused. But now looking back, you know, we left. And we thank God for his grace and his mercy because we know without him, again, we wouldn't be standing here today to even be able to record or speak or tell our truths. So I'm always grateful for the opportunity to be able to reach out and just impact, even if it's one person's life, you know? And I believe that our journey separate and together is doing just that.

[08:43] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I agree.

[08:45] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And, you know, I like to kind of go back to, like what Randall said, you know, we got to go backwards before we can go forward and just touch on how, you know, I myself was overcoming a very difficult situation in my life, you know, overcoming domestic violence and, you know, finally trying to find my own peace. And this is prior to Randall and I ever meeting, right. We never knew each other. And I remember watching the news, and, you know, on the news, it showed this black african american woman who lived not even 3 miles away from me, who had just been, you know, gunned down due to domestic violence. And there was, you know, some substance use involved. And I remember sitting there. I had just gave birth to my son, who's now five. And I remember weeping, you know, I was crying, and my heart was broken, and I didn't even notice woman. But I remember just being so hurt. And I remember asking, God, you know, why her and not me? You know? And just the way I grieve for this woman, you would have thought she was a family member or somebody I knew or somebody who's been a part of my life, you know, my entire life. And it wasn't until years later that this woman who already succumbed her life and had been taken from us, in fact, would be my mother in law. And, you know, when Randall shared, and I'm sorry, you know, for getting deep, but this is a part of my healing journey as well. When he shared that information with me that you, you know, the woman who was murdered, you know, back in July 28, 2018, was his mother, I cried again because it in fact, let me know that. And at the time, he and I were just friends, like, we were still, you know, figuring each other out. But it, in fact, let me know that our lives were not in vain, and we were meant to be and meant to meet and connect for whatever reason. Because, again, the way I mourned for, you know, Miss Vera Renee Williams. It felt like a part of me was lost and rebirthed that day. And in his story and in his sharing, you know, I felt connected to her through him. And again, I never even met this woman. That story will always stick with me because, you know, through our journey, we gave birth to a daughter who, again, reminds me of a woman that I've never even met, you know, down to her looks, her mannerism. And I'm just like, yeah, this has to be your mom. Cause she acts nothing like me. And she's so fierce and just brave in the courage that our daughter royal has. It just blows me away because she's Randall and I combined times a million, you know, so going through domestic violence and overcoming that and then, you know, meeting a man who firsthand, you know, witnessed domestic violence through the loss of his mother, and seeing him overcome that again, it gave me hope that one thing I did not have to worry about is with this Mandev. He will never put his hands on me or hurt me in a way, I've been hurt in the past, you know, absolutely. And I mentioned substance use, which is one of the reasons why I even got into this work. You know, originally, I was going to school to be an accountant, and I was going to go work for the FBI. But at the age of 19, which is now 20 years ago, I lost my father to a substance use overdose. So just through the trauma and the trials and tribulations that he and I both endured, it brought us to this place of. We both need to heal, you know, even from 2018. And then if you go all the way back to, you know, what was that? 2024, when I lost my father. I'm sorry. No, it's 2024 now, but 2004. Excuse me. When I lost my father, it allowed us to see that there's a greater war out here that's beyond, you know, the battles that he and I have accomplished and overcome and achieved and won. So we fight this good fight every day together, you know, regardless of our own hurts and our own vices and isms and pain. And we continue to, you know, give people hope and guidance. And I guess my question for you, Randall, is what would you say is one of your proudest moments leading up to where we are right now in this moment? Oh, hint, hint. She's sitting across from you.

[13:42] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I'm just saying one of my proudest moments, I would say this is going to be too obvious. So when I took a side, I was trying to think of something outside of us getting married and the wedding and everything.

[14:03] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Right.

[14:04] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I was trying to think of something outside of that, because as soon as you mention it, that's the first thing that comes up. But I think that's it. I don't think that I gotta put that one at number one. I agree for several reasons, but mainly, mainly because it signified a new chapter for me. It signified a whole new chapter. And sort of like how I started off this segment, by saying, this is leading up to chapter one. So that definitely starts a new beginning for me. And a lot of growth happened, mainly because I'm used to doing everything on my own, and I often find myself, I still do it unintentionally, and I may make a decision or do something and only consider myself. And it's not any disrespect to you, it's just how I've operated for 40 years. So if you or anybody, I challenge anybody to try to just do something 40 years straight and just stop one day, I don't care what it is. You may be mindful of some of the things you want to change, but there's still going to be some of it around. You may be able to catch it in real time sometimes. Sometimes it may be hindsight to where I realized that I did some of these things. Even when I try to explain it, it almost feels like I'm justifying it, but I'm not. It's not really about a justification. I just like for you to understand why I did something, not to justify that I've done something. And they're two totally different things, but sometimes they're so closely connected that it becomes a matter of perception. You can perceive it one way, and it's not necessarily how I intended it, but they're that close to where they can be mistaken. So I definitely get challenged on that on a daily basis, not from you, but from myself to make sure that I don't continue to do it. Mainly you figure I'm an only child.

[17:06] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And that's an interesting fact, because he's an only child and I'm the youngest child. So you got an alpha male and alpha female. And so those two dynamics, you know, colliding worlds, come into one because we both want what we want, when we want it. That's always an interesting, I'll say, better of the balance.

[17:26] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: That's true. And then you couple that with, I was around, you know, a bunch of women growing up, so you figure the only boy around a bunch of women. Yes, I had it my way.

[17:43] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Oh, boy, and low key. They still have spoiled.

[17:47] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I still have it my way. It's just, that's what it is. And I don't realize it because that's all I know.

[17:52] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Right.

[17:55] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I don't have anything to compare it to. So it's just normal to me. That's just how things are. Until I found out it's not, then it's like, oh, it's not like this. That's like somebody telling you that orange juice is not really orange. And your whole life you went through thinking orange juice was orange. Until you really look at it and it's green, it's like, hold on this. So it's one of those type of.

[18:19] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[18:20] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: To draw a comparison to something that would be very obvious, but, yeah, so it's kind of unlearn and relearn process. Absolutely.

[18:33] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[18:34] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: That I'm getting better at every day. But more importantly, accountability is my favorite word and I've told you that. So because of that, I'm mindful of it.

[18:47] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Right.

[18:48] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: So I try to, you know, stay accountable in that regard and continue to do the work that I need to do in order to, you know, be the best person for you, for our family.

[19:00] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[19:02] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: To provide, to be an inspiration, you know, to a positive influence. Like, I gotta do all of those things. I don't get to not be this person ever because the world is watching.

[19:22] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: That's right. And would you say, would you say that it's safe to say you've already been that person before, right. Who did it wrong, got it wrong, and the world was watching then. So they got to see you at your worst, if you will. So now we get to see you at your best. Would you say that plays a part of it, too? Because if you've done so much wrong, and I'm using air quotes in the past that you have more desire to do right now, today in the present and moving forward in the future?

[19:59] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Absolutely. And what that is, it's a tribute to a change in perception for me. Because everything you're considering that you're labeling I did wrong perception wise, I was doing everything right. It's only now that my perception changed that I got a different point of view on it. But technically, I've never did anything wrong because in my eyes, what I was doing was right. I just changed my definition or my perception of what's right. And by doing so, everything changed. So I've always been this person. I am. Every quality you see that I have has always been there. It's just I kind of flipped everything upside down, and which changes the view. It changes the viewpoint, but it's still the same. And that's the interesting thing about all of this, is that I've even prior to my perception change, I was always striving to be the best at what I was, the best person I could be.

[21:27] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[21:29] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I always wanted to get better. I always wanted to be the best at something. I always, I always had an influence without trying, just based on my actions, my morals, and what I stood for and the accountability that I would have and actually hold other people accountable to. So that was always me. And it's crazy because the more I'm saying it now, it's becoming more clear. That's why I'm able to say it.

[22:13] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And I want to say that those are the qualities that attracted me to you. You know, a lot of folks have, like, a physical attraction, and for me, I saw past that. You know, I felt like you mirrored everything that, you know, I embodied in for that reason. That's what went, that's what encouraged me to want to be even become friends with you. Because, you know, we started off as a business, right? And then from that we turned into friends, and from friends, you know, it turned into lovers, and now we're husband and wife and business partners. It was those exact qualities and traits that if we want to do it, be the best at it. You know, whether it's good, bad, or ugly, I'm going to be the best at whatever it is that I get myself involved in because we strive for excellence, and I feel like that is reciprocated in the work that we do. You know, through the works, recovery support, works will stand housing, key to the city contracting, movement coach and setting, and all the entities that we birthed, you know, and help people build underneath our leadership. And I'm truly grateful again for our tenacious spirits that allow us to take a step back and not be so quick to react and respond to things, but observe, assess, and then put a plan in place to execute. And I think that is one of the reasons or some of the reasons why we are successful, not in the sense of, you know, monetary things, but just in a sense of our relationship, our business, and our rapport that we're building throughout the community, Allegheny County, Pittsburgh as a whole.

[24:00] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Absolutely. And you're definitely spot on with that. And a lot of it, you know, comes from that day you mentioned July 28, 2018. That was hands down the worst day of my life. If we're going to talk about the best day of my life, that was the worst day, the one person that I could always count on no matter what, and that will always come to my rescue, no matter where I was at. I can. You know, we had, like, a connection that I can't even put a word together to describe it. I just know what it is. I know what that feeling is. And to lose something like that, that was another pivotal moment for me because it could have broke me. I could have allowed that to break me. I could have allowed losing my mom. I could have allowed that to be an excuse, a built in excuse for me to go do anything and to.

[25:31] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Resort back to bad old habits and.

[25:33] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Ways to do everything. And I could have just blamed it on that. And every. And anybody that I would have said that to, they would have kind of understood that, like, you know, well, that did happen to them. And they.

[25:45] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: They would have justified everything.

[25:46] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Could have kind of justified everything. But it wasn't in me to do that. I knew that if this happened, I gotta step my game all the way up because I had to channel. I had to channel my mom. I had to channel her and really consider how would she want me to respond to this because she knows how I would respond to it.

[26:21] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[26:26] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Bunch of rage. And just not, you know, nobody would have been able to calm me down or stop me from just overreacting on anything. But I'm a calm person naturally. I'm naturally always a calm person. Person. And that's where it came into play the most, was that day. That's what it. You know, it all led up to that day. And instead of allowing that day to break me, I kept moving to. I kept moving forward. And I even showed up to work the next day.

[27:17] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: He did.

[27:18] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I showed up to work with a smile on my face, ready to go. And when I walked in the office that day, forget hearing a pin drop, you can hear birds chirping inside the building from outside. That's how quiet it got. And nobody, but nobody at all thought that I would show up that day. And I showed up just, you know, business as usual. And nobody knew what to say. So, you know, I get it. But the one thing they did kept asking me is, like, what are you doing here? Why are you here? Why aren't you with your family? Why aren't you this, this and that? How are you? And I said, well, I need to be here. I needed this because I could have easily been somewhere, you know, crying, depressed, at home, under the blanket somewhere, curled up. Or I can come out, you know, get ready to go to work so I can help somebody else, because at the time, that was my role. I'm still doing the work today that I was doing back then. In 2018, I was just working at a different agency. But I decided that, you know, I had to go continue my mission and go out and do my job and help people. And that gave me the strength to keep going and keep going. And next thing you know, like, I'm, you know, fast forwarding a little bit, but we're going fast forward to. That was July. We're going to fast forward to November. I still haven't taken a day off from work yet. And then the director of the agency, he came over to me and he said, randall, you got to take some time off. You have to. I don't even know how you're doing this. I don't know where you're getting the strength from, but I don't even see. I can't really even see that you're, you know, that you're. That you're going through this. And he said, that is what scares me because I can't see it. It's that I can't see it. And, you know, I took his advice. I took some time off, went on bereavement. They got me connected with the EAP services. Yeah, with the EAP services and other therapeutic services and things of that nature. And what I ultimately did was I ended up using the rest of my PTO all together. And by the time it was over, I resigned, and I started key to the city contracting, and I went, started my own business. And from there, the reason that I started that is because I knew at some point I wanted to launch recovery support works, what we're doing now. And I knew I had to do something to be able to generate the revenue to start an organization like that. So I stuck with what I knew. I knew contracting, and I knew how to build, and I knew how to build a team. It's one of my strong suits, and that's what I did. And, you know, that's what kind of led me to you, because I did work on your house.

[31:19] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: That's right.

[31:20] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: And you knew how to do some of the things that I needed to do to get done for recovery support works. We had that common conviction. And fast forward a few years later. Recovery support works is becoming a very popular name throughout, you know, Pennsylvania as a whole. We're known throughout the entire state, and it's a tribute to all of the hard work and dedication that you and I put in. But it's our journeys absolutely everything we've been through thus far has gotten us here today.

[32:01] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And the one thing that I love about our story is for you. The journey started when you were incarcerated, and your mom is what led you to become a CPS, a certified peer support specialist. Right. For me, it was my freshman year of college, when my father overdosed, that led me to get into the field of social work. So now we have forensic certified peer specialists. We have me with my master's degree in social work. We both have our certified recovery specialist certifications. In addition to that, we have our criminal justice endorsements. We have the supervisor certifications. But not only do we have them, we are now able to facilitate Cr's groups and allow other people who have gone through the same journeys or who have overcome substance use received their certifications through our agency. You know, and that is a blessing, to be able to birth something from our own lived experiences and now allow others to have that same opportunity to share what you and I have gone through through employment, through starting our own businesses. You know, recovery support works, you know, was the flagship of our agency. And since then, because we recognize we are doing so much with housing, through purchasing, selling homes, you know, rehabbing homes, and allowing for supportive transitional housing and permanent housing, that we took these small entities and now created this empire. Empire, excuse me, through the works that is allowing us to touch men, women, you know, folks of all walks of life, like you said, throughout Allegheny County, Pittsburgh. And we're starting to get noticed even in other states, you know, and who would have ever thought our own lived experiences would have brought us to all of this? You know, when we start off in this world, you know, we think we have one plan, right, and we got it all figured out, and life. And God shows up and tells us, like, you know, what you thought was meant to be. You have no idea what I have in stores for you.

[34:18] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Absolutely.

[34:18] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And, you know, for a lot of people, they think you and I have arrived, but what they don't realize is, we're just getting started. You know, for us, this is just the beginning. And I'm just happy to be able to share it with somebody who has gone through some real life situations and appreciates it, understands and takes accountability for their actions. But more importantly, is the true definition of the term that you and I both coined, which is covery. And that's the dispelling of false and misleading notions inscribed by the past while taking a fresh step in a new direction. And, you know, we coined that term as we both were safely transitioning and addressing our own needs and helping others do the same. So I'm, again, just truly thankful for God placing you in my life and us not only birthing a family, but a legacy for our children and their children and hopefully their children to come. So truly, truly thankful for you, honey.

[35:22] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Absolutely. I feel the same way. I second that one. Thank you.

[35:29] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: As he should. Sure. And thinking about how you've not only, you know, like, birthed a family, but a legacy, if you could speak directly to your descendants, to your children, your children's children coming after you, what would you tell them? I think for me, I would say, of course, you know, my proudest moment is getting married and having a family because that's always been a goal. But I want them to know that one of the other most important and pivotal moments in my life is me not giving up, you know, me surviving and me fighting this good fight, even when my back was against the wall, even when family, you know, may have turned their backs on me or let me down or, you know, the world has helped me. No. Or, you know, shut me out of things. I'm just thankful and grateful for myself and with God's will and understanding and just all that his grace and mercy has been to me that I am still here today to be able to sit and share my life's experiences. And I'm just proud to be a wife, a mother, a sister, and just in spite of it all, still having a loving, caring heart that allows me to still pour into others even when my cup has been emptied many, many of times. So, you know, I would just want them to take that with them. That no matter what life throws at us and no matter how many times we get knocked down, know that we can always stand up and remember to stand up even when you don't feel like it or don't have the energy to do so.

[37:22] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: So for me, I would say live in a moment and don't get too caught up on the destination to the point you're not paying attention to the journey. It's always about the journey.

[37:39] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[37:41] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: And I would encourage my descendants to never forget that because that's the one thing that I used to that I struggled with. You know, it's always about the journey. And our currency is actually the relationships that we build and the networks. It's not money. Money is a tool. It's merely a tool to be reinvested so it can work for itself. It's not really meant for any other thing. But the people and the relationships that we built, those are the things that withstand the test of time and that make all of the difference. In the end, it's the people.

[38:38] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely, 100% agree. And one thing we always tell ourselves and our participants, and even our children, and we want this to stay with them as well. Slow and steady truly wins the race. Slow and steady wins the race. You know, it's a marathon, right? You don't have to rush through everything and be okay with making mistakes, but more importantly, be okay with asking for help and leaning on your supports, because had we not leaned on each other and our positive supports, again, who knows where we would be?

[39:20] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Absolutely. So I was trying not to do that, but I had to.

[39:28] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Hey, that's part of being human, right?

[39:29] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I know. All right, I'm back.

[39:32] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: And another thing that we do want them to take with them. And, Randall, you know, you can, you know, let me know. Cosign. I need you to cosign with me. And this is move with a purpose. You know, always make sure when you're moving, it's fruitful and you're progressing. We don't look for perfection, but we do look for progress. And that is the most important piece, you know, in that slow and steady process that you're going through. As long as you're positively progressing, keep moving and be okay with sitting still when needed. Again, thank you for this opportunity. I'm overwhelmed with emotions and feelings because not every day do you get to share a platform like this or just life in general with somebody who truly mirrors who you are. But of course, the male version, and I'm his female version, you know, just for the record. But, you know, I never would have thought I would have come across someone who compliments me the way you do. Do the good, bad, and ugly. And sometimes it gets ugly, but more often or not, it's always a beautiful harmony that we make together.

[41:09] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I agree.

[41:10] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Absolutely.

[41:11] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: I agree. And I'm just blessed and honored that you allowed me to.

[41:18] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Thank you.

[41:21] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: It's a blessing. I know it is. I don't take any of this for granted, because I know what it's like to not have it.

[41:28] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: Oh, honey, thank you. That means a lot. No, seriously, thank you.

[41:34] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: Mm hmm. Thank you.

[41:35] TOCCARRA WILLIAM: You're welcome. Wow. That means a lot. Yep.

[41:42] RANDALL S. WILLIAMS II: So.