Rene Marino and Micah Marino

00:00 My name is Micah Marino. I am 29 today is Friday, June 5th 2020 and I'm currently in Livingston Montana and I'm having a conversation with my mom Cecilia Marie. My name is Rene. Cicilia Marino and I'm working on my 7:00 now. I'm working on my 60 90 year. So I'll be 69 next April and today is the 5th of June 2020 and I'm in Bozeman Montana about 27 miles from you and I'm speaking with my son Micah.

00:47 And so I got to the point of this conversation is to discuss and archives what were experiencing and going through and

00:59 Maybe our maybe my grandkids will hear something or migrate Kendrick.

01:06 You never know. You never know by me being spontaneous and hearing that it was advertised on the radio station to and knowing that you were always interested in stories.

01:22 And I've always enjoyed storycorps.

01:26 Yeah, and I did not get a box of tissue. Let me say cuz I can tell already that I'm like, where's my hankies so

01:40 It's important to use on hands when you're having conversations around.

01:49 So we're a few months into the pandemic and it's definitely altered both of our Lives quite a bit.

02:00 Do you want to so see what was that question?

02:06 Are there any experiences from your past that help you prepare for this current crisis? How is this experience different?

02:18 Living up at the cabin without interacting with people and losing what's at hand wild plants gardening. That's definitely, you know prepared meme using what we have using what food there is around all that came very easily very naturally.

02:42 The difference the greatest difference was probably

02:48 Having to use these scented products constantly cuz I'm constantly fuzzy and feel like my like, I'm not clear-headed and my sinuses are reacting all the time cuz everything that the hand sanitizers cuz I'm in unscented person.

03:05 It's been non-stop sneezing and eyes running and fogginess. Yeah.

03:13 Yeah, they can definitely relate to that. I think there is a small population of people that have been experiencing the same thing as well. How about you you are there any experiences from your past that help prepare you for the current crisis and how is this experience different?

03:37 Well, thanks. I'm nearly 30. This is the first panda make that I have experienced and I think the first kind of make the most Americans have experienced.

03:48 And I suppose that you know growing up and living kind of off the land and

03:57 All that kind of give me an idea of how to be self-sufficient and how to produce your own food and understand the amount of work that goes into all of that.

04:09 And it's also very much illuminated how much I still need to learn about that and how many skills my parents have that I don't have but I am now I'm more interested in learning about because all the things that I've been putting my effort towards and work in all got obliterated pretty quickly by the pandemic and

04:38 Skills and skill sets and you know resources

04:44 That you can take with you regardless of what is taken from you.

04:50 Is something that I am more interested and

04:54 Definitely more adamant about learning and developing those skills.

05:01 And there's so much that you and Dad know that I want to know.

05:05 Well, you have awesome interpersonal skills.

05:12 So that's one thing.

05:15 Being able to self calm yourself.

05:20 Knowing like certain things that calm you and being able to to be empathetic you're incredibly empathetic and compassionate and and especially with me and

05:35 Those carry you everywhere.

05:39 And just being a real observant lyrics credibly observant and

05:46 And always kind and helpful, so

05:50 Other skills made me think that you were when you said that made me think, you know, like that's more like knowledge like you can walk away with nothing on your back and have knowledge but being open enjoyable to look at things from all parts of the circle.

06:08 You know, everybody's perspective, you know, and I think you're good at that working with groups.

06:17 You've been you've been so great with the youth with the children in in them in this community in this Valley and in the end in the community where you are now for so many years, you know, you've been like a

06:34 A role model superhero for our youth

06:39 Not a pretty awesome.

06:44 Has been pretty awesome.

06:47 Let's get that money. Me a lot.

06:49 I'm always blown away at how capable children are if you let them.

06:56 Incapable, you know, you don't hold them back. If you don't cuddle them and I definitely a tribute a lot of

07:05 That to you how you raised us and how you know, you didn't give us everything and you helped us appreciate hard work and you it wasn't a lot of no in my life. You know, there was a lot of

07:25 Just providing opportunities for need to be whatever I wanted to be and

07:32 You didn't tell me to be careful or to get down from there. I mean, I know that I definitely contributed to a lot of anxiety.

07:49 Like what did you see early on?

07:56 Like the career that I chose did you see something like that when I was growing up being the first of the kids and all the kids. I took care of two want to go down the slide up sliding backwards when nobody else ever. Did you know did that? Yeah, and when you weren't weren't even two yet. Yeah you always yeah always the risk taker and yeah, there was something I tried to always eliminate from my vocabulary from the get-go cuz I never want to hear a child say it to me then I wanted you know, I'm to make everything in the house.

08:33 Kid-friendly, you know kid friendly, but

08:41 And then the trampoline I remember seeing that big olympic size trampoline at the Sweet Pea festival. And those young men seem like such good Role Models. Just they just seem so happy with life and So Satisfied with their health and what they could do and so I was determined to get you one of those trampolines the sickness we had health insurance.

09:09 What's took a while ago we got Children's Health free health insurance cuz we're low income.

09:20 Yeah, so that trampoline is a bit over 20 years old and I think that's like the single most.

09:28 Pivotal thing that you ever got me because they got trampoline or used to as of like last week reside and unparalleled movement my gym and has taught thousands of kids how to do flips and how to jump and how to have fun, but I got that for my birthday and I'm turning 30 next month.

09:51 That was a big game-changer now. It's been like that all day every day, but it wasn't snowing and even still sometimes knowing on a trampoline. I think like, you know ahead of time that you're currently on for your birthday.

10:15 I don't know. I mean maybe like a few days ahead possibly cuz I have a memory of like getting it like putting it on the truck or something and driving and it wasn't mailed to our house and I can't remember that. I I knew I would never get around ones that I would only get an olympic size.

10:36 And I used those free air or I can get what they were called. They let you know from the get-go when I saw those guys and I saw what they did. I got all the information of what kind and where to get it and everything and then used our

10:55 Are earned income credit?

10:59 When we get our taxes to buy it.

11:04 Which

11:06 Which took some negotiating with my co-producer of you?

11:12 But speaking of co-producing you were definitely

11:19 Definitely conceived in with an intention and with love in a loving relationship and very intentional because I didn't want to raise another only child cuz I was an only child and I wanted to I wanted something different or for my kids.

11:42 Yeah, I think that's out of the trampoline. My sister was the best gift that you could have bought me where her to have me as soon as you were born. She wanted you she just took you and wanted you.

11:53 And it calmed her down.

11:57 They did come her down. We were just I was just so afraid that she might hurt you cuz she was Queen Kong by Lil Subaru rest are done everything. I was liking but she was gentle with you.

12:14 Hey, the daughter.

12:18 What is the time?

12:21 Kids are tougher than we think.

12:25 Go for it.

12:27 Do you have some what is she like your older sister?

12:38 My oldest sister is my best friend.

12:42 She's my co-conspirator. She's the person that can relate to.

12:53 All my experiences because it was always us.

12:58 Witnessing and experiencing and

13:01 Collaborating and commiserating together

13:06 As a

13:08 Now we watched.

13:11 Our family a ball and change and move apart and

13:21 Yeah, like we moved away from each other when I was 12th. And so I haven't had the opportunity to really live in the same city as her really like that for a brief moment.

13:36 I can wait 10 girly twenties.

13:39 And I think that's a separation.

13:43 My mom and her living with her dad kind of made any time we had together special.

13:50 Because it wasn't that we got to see each other every day.

13:55 So like a real Bond.

13:59 Developed

14:00 Because we were still have the same parents have the same, you know.

14:11 That we were able to.

14:13 Just make our time together bit more special because it was rare.

14:22 I have a technical question was I supposed to do something to the red button that says hello there in Frozen on your screen. The the clock is running online.

14:38 Okay, good good.

14:42 Is there an ice cream as well? I always felt incredibly guilty for separating U of f first we were all moving over here together. And as soon as Aspen and days wanted to move back cuz of being a sophomore in high school and go wanting to go back to her friends. I was going to move back to and then in the end in my memory.

15:08 You you didn't want to move back.

15:12 And then I was in a quandary room.

15:18 But anyway that I always well I feel guilty.

15:23 For separating us

15:28 There's always a lot for you know, mom's may just kind of wait wear a backpack that has you listed it that you know that I feel like I gave you my workaholism, you know that I know and not enough play.

15:45 And and then I look in my momma's like that and her mom and her especially her dad was like that.

15:54 Hopefully we're getting to be less and and we will learn to do the play in the fun first instead of the work first.

16:07 But you definitely been a playful Delight in my life.

16:17 Someone asked me at the end of when we knew the business was over or that version of the business was over to ask me like if I would have done anything different or if there's anything that would have avoided.

16:34 And

16:36 I don't think I would have changed anything that we did because I always appreciated my business partner and I we would discuss things and I always felt as if we were making the best decision we could at the time with information that we had.

16:54 But if I were to do things over again, I would have enjoyed it more.

16:59 And I would have

17:01 Cuz I felt the weight of it on my shoulders.

17:07 Cared about the appearance of it and the quality of the product and I put that before everything and as a result.

17:18 I didn't necessarily enjoy every moment of it and what I built and what I created and their families and kids that it impacted was all beautiful, but I could have definitely gotten more joy out of it than I did.

17:38 Claire's

17:40 That lesson comes around and around in a circle or a spiral for for us maybe for most people. I don't know. I know I wished I had jumped on the trampoline a lot more but I was more worried about getting the cover on and putting the sunscreen on it and taking care of it. I do have Fondest Memories of sleeping on it in the hot summer and working on your reading skills with it me reading a page and you reading a page about things you were interested in you remember castles or dragons or whatever stories? Do you know so

18:17 But not as much jumping as I could have done jumping for joy now. I bounce on the balls big exercise balls.

18:29 I never thought to like lay blame on Aspen leaving and having the kids separated. It was just where we all needed to be and I think that I wanted to be in Bozeman because of the opportunities that doesn't had I didn't think that Livingston had many opportunities for me and having a jam to go to and having you be able to you know, pursue an education and go to college and pursue a good thing that you wanted to pursue. I'm glad that dad had a daughter at home. I'm glad that you had a son and they have a special connection there too. And I just thought I was being weak that I I should have, you know demanded that she give it a month or give it, you know two weeks or something, but cuz I was not happy with

19:28 The crowd that she was with in the friends that she had I didn't think it was safe for her and she was very much left alone a lot.

19:37 I was still going once a week to bring food and

19:42 But anyway, we are here now.

19:50 One of the hard part about being young and having parents that look out for you is that you think you know when you're young you think that and to some extent like children in particular are so much wiser than adult but teenagers are somewhat of a different story because we think we know what's best for us and poor so easily and

20:20 And we're stubborn and digging our feet especially when something is taboo, or you're not supposed to do. It just becomes so much more alluring.

20:33 I don't think that there's really anything that you could have done. I think that there would have been a lot more fighting in our home if Aspen would have

20:41 Stayed

20:45 And it all worked out the way it worked out.

20:49 And I'm glad that I had a jam and I'm glad that you were able to go to school.

20:54 And I definitely changed a lot. I think that if I would have stayed in Livingston, I would have become an artist and instead I went to I was man in became an athlete can a couch

21:09 Let me know I wanted to become a Spanish teacher and then I got that and it was incredibly hard and stressful.

21:17 To be in that school district. I was in in in the the evilness there the

21:24 This was not a good place wasn't a healthy but was not healthy and that's pretty much my wish for everybody. All the time is that we all be healthy in in all the ways, but it led to a job that I loved in a place that I left with children that I just you know.

21:43 Love and miss you so much with.

21:52 And the covid-19 ended all that for right now. So that's that job. The last couple weeks is Justin pretty hard.

22:03 Going through everything getting rid of it and all the memories that it brings up.

22:11 140 kids like potty trained and taught to tie their shoes and had such good times outside with them with the baby goats and sledding in.

22:24 Exploring nature with them I listening to to what they need to say would really listening to them when they couldn't be with their parents from 7:30 in the morning to 5:30 in the evening and giving him their three meals a day one. That's the one skill. You have really? Well down. That was good for the covid-19.

23:02 Both of us have lost our our things that we built and worked so hard for the last decade pretty much by was at that job since I was 7, so that's pretty long time.

23:18 Are we founded our gym in 2009, but we're touching 2011 or 2011, but I've been coaching at Missoula 2009.

23:35 Who is the new era has you become 30 and I'm getting close to 70.

23:46 I'm looking for I'm curious to hear more.

23:52 Preschool teacher that right

23:58 Yes in a beautiful building in the Bozeman Senior Citizen Center the huge building and the East Wing was devoted to a group child care. So I enter I it was intergenerational. So I mixed kids and seniors together some every day and had senior volunteers, but it was just a big beautiful building and big huge windows with all this natural light in the patio. We could just walk right out onto to do all our dirt and growing and then we boarded we could go out the other doors and you are in a beautiful Park and that was a great Hill for sledding on a good park for just about everything in the the the local bus is right on the corner too so we can get on the bus and go around town and do things in the community and

24:52 And mixing the seniors and the kids together was just a win-win situation. Just so great.

24:59 Former, I'm I'm very sensitive to the architecture of where I am and and and it was so became my home because I was there so much for the time. So that was my dream as far as always wanting Windows over my kitchen sink that face the East and had a view of mountains or you know, a patio with things I can grow easily, you know, and just need to be able to step outside and be a nature instantly in with excellent view of the sky and clouds and mountains here. So so so anyway it was and I'm and I know every day that I walked in there I was grateful.

25:42 An appreciative so I don't really have any regrets. I just know.

25:48 How difficult it is for the families that I serve right now to lose what they had their and they're they're all reaching out and they're all struggling right now cuz they need the childcare desperately and an even if they didn't have it this summer, we were supposed to reopen the middle of May and then the 1st of June.

26:09 And for sure everybody knew they had the fall, you know, cuz these people have to work when many of them or helps her healthcare providers many about more than half of my family's work in healthcare. And so they've just

26:25 How does a big you know shock to their system when towards the end of May the the board of the senior center decide to close permanently?

26:37 So so yeah big change for it and I don't think that the board realize what an extreme ripple effect butterfly effect that they are doing this house because our environment was perfect for this time because we have so much space and so much better Malaysian and so easily access to being outside and I created all I mean I had already all these curriculum for outside but I am you know prepared all this stuff for everything individual so and so we could to be in two separate pods for EZ contact racing does the same kids in the same teacher three days a week and then the other same kids for two days a week and

27:20 Shortened hours and just like the whole thing. I all the new policies and everything. So I prepared really well for this and then it was like kind of a bottom-line thing not so profitable and

27:35 The the fear of

27:39 Covid children carrying it and bring it to the seniors. Although, you know, moving forward. The program would have been changed work until it was incredibly safe. We would not mix anymore. We had separate entrances and everything separate bathrooms and everything cuz we already had that we already had a separate entrance in separate two separate bathroom. So, but anyway, I could not fight.

28:05 Any harder than I did for my families?

28:12 So the last couple weeks has been be bringing them things from the preschool cuz I have to get rid of everything and bring them their personal things and visiting with them and see how they're doing. All it is.

28:27 So it's it's been hard.

28:33 Do you have a fond memory in your time as a teacher that stands out to you maybe in this time that you're reflecting?

28:46 Being outside with the kids looking at the clouds and sledding with them and you know sitting in

28:55 The field of dandelions that we have all the yellow and them running with their their silk capes all different colors and their big colorful Hoops many really good memories.

29:10 Just how much how kind everybody was he to each other. There's a lot of lot of loving between the kids and I'd have the second or third or fourth kid from the same family.

29:27 I served a lot of family is a lot of the community just like Micah did just like Micah does.

29:34 And I may continue to do in a different forms moving forward.

29:47 So I am looking forward to to what evolves.

29:53 For both of us

29:59 Yeah, it's hard to put in words like losses that Bozeman and Missoula.

30:07 Had with both of our facilities closing

30:11 Because they're

30:14 Was so unique and really dedicated people behind them.

30:22 Lake McDonald things that you did as an employee

30:27 For that facility, you know we going in on weekends on your own time writing grants to get a you know, a water thing in the sandbox and actual little park there just like the amount of time that you put into the extra things because you really cared about the place and what you could do with the kids that just really rare like I can't imagine having an employee that would do them out of work that you did. Like I are the business owner of my own business didn't even come close to doing the knot of things that you did for that preschool and

31:11 It's a

31:13 It is sad because it should be sad because what you did mattered but

31:19 We can carry on with our lives and we can continue to do good in those kids that had the fortune of working with you are better humans because of you.

31:31 Ditto Mega ditto

31:35 Thank you.

31:46 I do know that both of us have similar attributes and working really hard as definitely something that I think I got from you. And I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but I feel guilty for all three of my kids have that problem.

32:11 Yeah, but this experience has taught me and showed me that.

32:19 Make sure that the things are working on.

32:26 Make sure the things you're working on matter and can

32:31 Last and I think of the work that I did mattered but a lot of the work that it is in that place didn't matter as much and I spent a lot of time being busy on things that made a difference to me but didn't necessarily make a difference that was worth the sacrifice.

32:53 And so I hope that both of us can be more intentional with our time and

33:02 Put more joy and play into our lives because

33:07 Or really easy or it's really easy for us to martyrize ourselves for the

33:16 Some cars that we think is like more worth it been like our own personal Joy.

33:22 And

33:24 I'm just trying to be more aware of when I do those things and it might be being busy just to be busy and I creating a story.

33:34 That's not necessary. I don't know if any of that really. Yeah, I'm all for more joy and delight and just watching the sky and the clouds in the colors in the morning in the evening my mom for more rest and health.

33:56 Yeah, it's been interesting to go through all of this cuz there's been so much doing and there hasn't necessarily been a lot of time to process and a feel all the feels like what actually is happening and I felt like that for a while just in general running the business because I'm an expert in that and it's hard to even have my

34:19 Oh and thoughts are to think clearly because my brain is so overly consumed by all the things that I had to do to make the business work.

34:30 And so I'm looking forward to getting some of my brain back.

34:34 Time to daydream

34:40 If I ever have kids and they're listening to this, is there anything that you would want them to know about me or know about you?

34:52 How much fun that you have always been?

34:57 You always seem to have time for me when I need you when I reach out.

35:04 You've always given me your full attention when I need it.

35:09 Good night, and just sign into light that you brought to my life.

35:20 About me I don't know but I think it's important to know the flowers know what plants you can eat know how to cook know how to garden to sew a button on or mendousa.

35:34 Heritage is so much with them that my parents had that I have yet to learn how to take care of each other listen to each other and make make a good pot of tea.

35:52 Is there anything that you want me to ask you?

35:57 I don't think so.

36:02 I feel pretty satisfied with our conversation.

36:07 What do you want people to know about you?

36:14 Both of you

36:17 Are you asking about them?

36:22 I think that both of us always try really hard and

36:38 We we we

36:41 We pay attention to the little details and are very observant to other people's feelings and needs and

36:54 I guess I lost you like a detriment to our own happiness.

36:59 I even know that's like what I want people to know about me.

37:07 I don't know the answer for this mom about me. I'm I'm always ready to do whatever the adventure is. Like. I'm like, I always say yes to I always sleep and think the net will be there. You know, I'm always up for the adventure. Maybe that's made me a bit of a rebel or I am Intrepid. I am Intrepid and and because of that we've had awesome experiences that now I shake my head up and think what was I thinking you know,

37:42 Didn't buy that Critter bad or whatever you do or you know, like all our different Adventures, but but I'm looking back. I'm glad that I've been brave and Intrepid and Anna Pioneer Inn in many many fields, you know, creating, you know pictures and herbs for children in the 80s. What do they sell them? But you know, where do you know teaching yoga and meditating and now that and let you know 1970s?

38:14 Always seem to be on the frontier.

38:19 You've always been ahead of your time. I caring about all the things that you.

38:25 Created and made like and where like that are so trendy now.

38:36 Yeah.

38:38 Well, I love you so much for give me for all my mistakes and know that I do love you tremendously.

38:47 I love you, too, Mom. I'm looking forward to having more time to spend with you and spend with my dad and

38:57 Spend time with the people that matter because spending time with people that you love and doing things that you love should really be more of a priority in our lives. And we we saw that in you know the times we lived in Mexico and other cultures we saw we saw that more, you know, everybody, you know, Grandma and everybody was together. The family said that was the joy was just in hanging out just in hanging out and visited and talking and passing time together.

39:40 Appreciate appreciate you and all that you've done for me so much.

39:48 StayWell

39:52 Yeah you as well. Thank you for being so careful around me.

39:58 And reminding me to be careful.