Stacie Williamson and Adam Barlow-Thompson

[00:04] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Well, hello. My name is Stacey Williamson, and I am 39 years old, which I on most days forget. And today is Monday, April 11, 2022. I am in my home in Mays, Kansas, and we're just a little suburb right outside of Wichita to the northwest. And the name of my conversation partner today is Adam Barlow Thompson. And I've never met Adam, so our relationship is a budding one. Okay. And I'm going to read this. Here we go. I'm Adam Barlow Thompson. I live in the Soc neighborhood with my wife and eight year old son. My wife and I are ordained clergy in the United Methodist Church. We are also co founders of the neighboring movement, a nonprofit who believes relationship with neighbors of all stripes is essential for restoring the social fabric of our country. My faith informs my liberal social views. The issue most important to me is finding a way to talk to each other, which is why this project is appealing.

[01:20] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Okay, do I go now? Okay. So, my name is Adam Barlow Thompson. I am 38. So much younger, obviously, than Stacey. And today is Monday, April 11, 2022. I am in my office here on South Broadway in Wichita, Kansas, and my conversation partner's name is Stacey Williamson. And we've not met before today, so we're. I'm excited to meet her and understand about her life a little bit. And Stacy's bio is that I appreciate small town feels and big time fun. I'm an independent thinker and feeler. I am a Christian. Though registered Republican, my life's experience and adventures have shaped my thoughts, beliefs, and I opinions to not always reflect being so. I have been married to my husband for eleven years, and we have three children, ages ten, eight, and seven. We are a servant military family with deep pride for our community and country. And I was raised in a hard working family and I'm a first generation college graduate.

[02:41] STACEY WILLIAMSON: We just take it away.

[02:42] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Do we just go now? Okay. Awesome. All right, so, Stacey. Yeah. Like, this gives me a little bit of info. How long have you guys lived in maze?

[02:56] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So we've lived in maze now for eight years. Prior to living out here, we were in the Indian Hills neighborhood, so I don't think, you know, too far away from you. We liked the riverside community, but wanted a little bit bigger yard, so we found that in the Indian Hills area. I actually grew up going to maze in the school district, so I was familiar with this side of town, and I've been a westsider, if you will, my whole life.

[03:23] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right.

[03:24] STACEY WILLIAMSON: But I love being out here in maze.

[03:27] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah. So you were. You say you're a military family. Was that, like, part of your childhood?

[03:32] STACEY WILLIAMSON: It was not. I guess it's really interesting because it's something that has always been a part of my family, though no one in my immediate family was in the military. My husband, before we had met, and actually, he's born and raised Wichita as well, and went to heights High, though we never knew each other. That's a story for another day. Small town. He was in the Marine Corps, went in at 17, and was just finishing up the last two years of his eight year term when we started dating and got out of that, got onto the Wichita fire department and decided he really did miss the kind of structure, I guess, if you will, of the military and also having the eight years and decided, you know, why not go back? And we were just about to have our first child, so here we are. He's still in. We're almost at 20 years collectively, so, no, it's just something that. It's always been special to me and my family, but now, obviously, being buried to somebody in the service, it takes on a whole new toll, and that has grown infinitely as we've survived a 15 month deployment. And that was very trying. Our kids were tiny. My daughter was two when he left, so it was. It was a patch in our life, if you will.

[04:55] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah, for. For sure. Well, it's so. I mean, like, so many military families around here are here, and then they move and they're relocated. So it's cool to have, like, you grew. You both grew up here, you've gotten to stay here.

[05:09] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've really felt fortunate for that. So I was curious about the soci community. I googled it, as I do with most things, and I'm super intrigued by it. I love the concept. And your nonprofit.

[05:28] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah. So the. I mean, yeah, I was a pastor and served in a local church in Derby for six years. Okay. And it was. Serving in a local church was really hard because it was. I just felt like I wasn't actually able to live out my faith as a paid employee of a church, which is not something everybody can immediately. A lot of people are like, wait, you were paid? That's what your job was. How. How did that. The problem was you. You actually get paid to, like, you know, help people be a part of this one organization more than, like, go out and change the world. And I just. It wasn't working for me, and so I. My wife and I just wanted to be good neighbors. That was, like, the most authentic version of our faith. It. I mean, Jesus was like, pretty into that as well. Kind of a big deal. Yeah. So we were like, okay, let's see if we can do that. And we'd been meeting with some other friends of ours, a couple that my wife worked with. They were in it. My wife was working at Andover United Methodist Church at the time, and one of the pastors there, we started meeting. Started saying, what would be, like, how do we live out our faith outside of our jobs as pastors? And we just said the best and most simple thing that we could do is be good neighbors. Like, that's just what it is, without having to, like, then, like, have this, like, side project of, I hope you get to come to my church eventually and, you know, become a tithing member. Um, we didn't want that. We just wanted to genuinely be good neighbors. So we moved into this neighborhood just south of downtown, in which it's a neighborhood usually defined by South Broadway corridor, which is, like, a place known for all the problems that it has. Yeah, there's trafficking and drugs and all sorts of stuff that happen and still do. And what we discovered is that the people in this neighborhood actually are pretty awesome. And those. All of those problems, not that I want to diminish them. Cause they're real, but they don't actually define the neighborhood. What defines the neighborhood is my neighbor, Mark, who always checks in on the people who live in their homes alone and make sure that they're okay. And a kid, Joseph, in our neighborhood, who started his own lawn business and mows lawns for people, and we'll often mow lawn for people.

[07:53] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Who is that? JJ?

[07:56] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: I don't think he's ever. I don't think he goes by JJ.

[07:59] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Okay.

[08:00] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: I don't know, though. I mean, he just. His name is Joseph to me. He's in my phone as Joseph Lawn kiddeh. So you know what I mean? Like. Like this. Neighbors are interesting because neighbors, the way that we talk about it, is, like, we often have weak ties with neighbors. Like, they're not family, they're not friends. It's a different category of relationship altogether. But when you have a lot of weak ties in a neighborhood, it creates a strong community. It's why this project's interesting to me is, like, most of my neighbors don't have agree with me politically. I mean, maybe not most, but, I mean, it's at least half and half, right? Like, not everybody's on the same page politically, and that's okay. And. But being neighbors still lets us, like, interact with each other in a way that a lot of other spaces aren't built to do. And so, so that, that's an interesting part of what we try to do. We work in our neighborhood, then we work across the state. We have a training program that we do where we help people become community organizers and then do local projects wherever they're at. And then we have, across the country, we train churches and how to be good neighbors. It's like a nine month training program that churches go through. And so been doing that since 2016 is when I left the local church. My wife still is in a local church. She's Calvary United Methodist church on the northeast side of town.

[09:22] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So did you guys both grow up here in Wichita?

[09:26] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: No. So my wife grew up in Milwaukee, and then I grew up in Salina, and so I always had, like, Wichita. When you grow up in Salina, Wichita is like a huge city with so many problems because, so Lyna is, like, small town is what we thought. And so we. I went to southwestern College in Winfield for college, and then I went to seminary in Chicago, where I met my wife. And when I met her, I told her, I'm a Kansan, and I'm going back to Kansas. So, like, we can date if you want, but, like, you got to move to Kansas potentially. It's a tough sell for people, no matter how charming you are. So she was interested, and she stuck with me. And so we ended up moving back to Kansas in 2010. And in the Methodist church, when you're in, when you're a pastor in the Methodist church, you get appointed, so they tell you where to go. And so similar to, like, military service, we just got told within the state of Kansas and Nebraska, they could have put us anywhere. They put us in Derby and Andover, and we lived in Wichita then in, like, the college hill area. So that was where he first moved.

[10:46] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So, oddly enough, as you were talking, there's a lot of, like, connectors there. And one of the reasons I asked about Joseph is my husband has only worked at two fire stations in his time in Wichita, one of which is station two at Broadway and Lincoln. Right in.

[11:03] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: It's two. It's like two buildings away from me. And their sirens. You may hear their sirens on this call. Yeah.

[11:11] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So for years and years of my life, that's where I would go and visit him. And then now he's not far from there. He joined the rescue team many years ago, and when he did, they moved him to the headquarters. So he's at Meridian and Kellogg. So it's the next ship over to the west, basically. But that community, you know, it really is something. And they get to know all of the people, just as you were saying, for the good and the bad, but there's actually a lot of good in it. And they really do become a community to the firehouse as well.

[11:45] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: For sure. For sure, yeah. So what we do in, like, our approach to building community is to say, start with what's already good in a community. And don't assume that you need outside institutions like the city or nonprofits to come in and save the people in this community. Instead, gather actual people who live here and let them produce their own future. And it's really fun. It's just, like, a blast. Like, a ton of my time is just, like, getting to know neighbors and then connecting them. So, like, there's a block that all the neighbors care about the same thing. They don't know each other, though. And so, like, we're going to connect them. We're scheduling a meeting and saying, hey, let's, like, introduce you all to each other and see if you can produce, like, create something really cool on your block.

[12:33] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Do you find that people are receptive to it, or are they a little reluctant at first?

[12:38] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah, I always like to think of it. It's just, like, working out. People know it's a good thing to do, but. But they don't always go do it right. And so, like, they genuinely think it's a good idea. They're like, oh, yeah, like, I should know my neighbors. Like, it obviously helps and makes people safer, but I'm pretty busy and it's awkward, and I've been living next to them for five years, and I still don't know their name. And so there's, like, all these reasons why they don't do it then, but so a lot of our work is just, like, the practical, giving people advice on how to go push through the awkwardness and actually meet a neighbor.

[13:20] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Well, I also connected with you when you talked about it was kind of, like, struck me, like, when you talked about being in the church and feeling like it was something that you really felt called to do and wanted to do, but not so much to, like, get a paycheck from it. So I have been in the nonprofit world since zero eight, two years with big brothers, big sisters, and then I went from there to Wichita State University at the foundation. So fundraising. Fundraising. And now I'm at Hart Spring and also in fundraising and lead a team of fundraisers. And while it's absolutely incredible and empowering to be able to help those who may not have the financial means to receive the services that they need. For me, there are these moments of, like, burnout, and it's not about the ask, it's where over time, you know, I've been with Hart spring now for almost seven years. You create these really genuine relationships. And I feel like if you're not going to create a genuine relationship, like, don't be in the business, but you have to then go back to them time and time again and ask for money. And while they trust you, it can. It can burn out. Because I don't want to keep going back to them and asking for money. I just want to be their friend now, you know? But at the end of the day, I'm paid to ask them for money.

[14:39] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right.

[14:40] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So I think it's like, that balance of this is real, and I want to be your friend for now. And, like, when there's a time and a reason, like, I'm going to come to you and ask you to support this cause.

[14:51] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right? Yeah, no, that is totally weird. I mean, like, we. We've really tried to, like, keep our income streams pretty diversified so that I. We don't have. Just, like, to ask people for money to do the work we're doing. We. Our pitch last year as a professional fundraiser. I need your advice. And so you'll. You can correct me and help. Help me make this better. Um, but because we. We tell people, like, we are, our job is to help people make relationships, but you can't pay people to be your friend. Like, that doesn't work very well. Like, people don't like that. It feels bad. And so we're not, like, when you donate to the neighboring movement, you're not paying for relationships, but you're helping us buy a bigger table and more chairs and more leaves. And then we're helping, then we're creating space so more people can sit at this table and be a part. Be around it with us. So that was our pitch.

[15:49] STACEY WILLIAMSON: I think that's incredible. Through my ways of hunting, I was able to find some of that and even the projects that you all are doing. And I think I. That in itself is inspiring. Not just in the community, but just making our space, you know, in general, a better place.

[16:09] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: I mean, I'm so impressed with your, like, Internet sleuthing. That's great.

[16:19] STACEY WILLIAMSON: I like to call it resourceful.

[16:21] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yes. Yes. That's what it is. That's what it is. Yeah.

[16:25] STACEY WILLIAMSON: No, I was just really intrigued. I love to learn about new things, and especially things that have positive influence in the community. So it was really exciting for me.

[16:37] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right. Yeah. So you. You are a registered Republican, but you say that that's not, like. Doesn't necessarily define all the things. What does that mean for you?

[16:48] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Well, I would say there are some in my family who are, like, hardcore Republican and people in my family who show up to family dinner armed and ready to talk about every political issue ever. And that's not me. It is if you agree with them, it's a great time. If you have any differing opinion, watch out. So that sets me a little bit apart, I would say, from, like, the most of my immediate family. I think I'm just more open and a little more accepting of those who are not like me. And for some in my family, that comes across as playing, like, the ad, the devil's advocate, if you will. At times I've thought about registering myself as independent, and that's why I shared in my bio of I'm very independent and strong willed when it comes to my own thoughts and feelings. Like, you're not going to be able to. I'm not saying, like, in a healthy conversation, like, sway me to something, but when it's deep rooted beliefs or, you know, religious, I guess, issues, I'm always gonna see your side, but I'm gonna be comfortable to feel like the way I feel and convey that in a respectful way, I think.

[18:08] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right.

[18:09] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So there's a lot in the republican values that I do really strongly value. Obviously, being a military family, you know, I do agree with, like, right to bear arms, protect yourself. I don't agree. I think there are so many things that we need to do with, like gun laws, not to get on that, but that we do need to be safer about it and know who owns a weapon, because originally weapons were made to harm. Right. And kill others. And so in our house, we do. We have guns, and my kids will grow up hunting, but we're trying to instill in them very healthy values. I mean, even with toy guns, they're not allowed to point them at people because that's what a weapon is for. Right. So we can shoot darts and things like that at targets, but, you know, it's one of those things where if we're gonna go hunt, we have to eat what we hunt. And I think that's just, like, I understand groups who are not okay with that, but I'm like, it's like the mother of all earth. Like, God provided this to us. It's the most humane way to nourish ourselves. Right.

[19:14] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah.

[19:14] STACEY WILLIAMSON: There are inhumane ways to use that. So that's, like, one thing I would say where.

[19:18] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right.

[19:19] STACEY WILLIAMSON: I fluctuate, but I. We have my I. So I grew up in a competitive cheer world, and that's one of the things, too, that I feel like shaped me for good and for bad. It's crazy how many people say they're non judgmental, but the minute you say you're a cheerleader, you've got, like, tattoos all over you, you're ditzy you're too outgoing, you're loud, you're not smart, probably, you know, like, just all of these super judgmental things. And it's like, just because somebody is happy and excited for others or athletic doesn't mean that there isn't more to them. And with that, as I grew into a cheerleading career and cheered in college, I was around more diverse people, because in Mays growing up, I really wasn't. And I mean, I think when I started in school there, I maybe saw one child who was black. And then even in high school, I graduated in zero one. I think there were two or three kids who were black. I mean, it was really, really low exposure, but my cheerleading was not affiliated with the school, so that opened up the door. But then I was around individuals who were homosexual or more exploring with that. And that was something my family wasn't as used to, but I became very used to. It was normalized, honestly, in the industry and has become even more so, I believe. So it was kind of that moment in your life where you're exposed to something and you either get a cash judgment or be open, loving and accepting of it. And I've just always been the more rather than cash judgment, like, I mean, I don't know. I just don't find value in that. It's going to be harmful to you and to me. And so, again, so that one goes against republican value, I feel like, yeah, I don't know. I guess that would lead me to ask you, like, you're liberal.

[21:19] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah.

[21:20] STACEY WILLIAMSON: You were serving of a United Methodist church. I was, like, kind of surprised by that.

[21:24] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah.

[21:25] STACEY WILLIAMSON: I don't know what your take is on that.

[21:28] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: It's interesting, like the. So being a pastor in has some similar things where, like, where you're saying, like, when I say I'm a cheerleader, people assume a lot of things about me. When I say I'm a pastor, people assume a bunch of things about me. And the. Yeah, I mean, the tradition of Christianity that I've been a part of, pretty much my whole experience of Christianity has been within a group of people who are very progressive and liberal. So even though I grew up in Salina, Kansas, when I started going to church in earnest, my older sister started going to a youth group. And we just were like, okay, I guess we'll do that, too. And so we started going. And the youth group that we happened to be at, the youth pastor was an openly gay man, and the church was just all cool with that. So, like, I didn't know. Like, I didn't. I had not really been exposed to anything. I just thought that was like, I guess we're all cool with this.

[22:32] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah.

[22:33] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: And so then I go to, you know, to college, and I start getting involved in the other groups, like, christian groups in college, and they're like, your youth pastor was gay. Like, are you sure you're not going to hell? And I was like, I don't know. Like, am I? I don't know. And for me, it just, like, that initial grounding in that kind of expression of christian faith, which had that this view of God's ultimate, like, action in the world is through grace, not through judgment. It's not about whether or not you're going to hell or not. That's not really the purpose of this. The purpose is that God is always seeking us and that always trying to offer love, and that often that happens through relationships with other people. And so we. I just always felt that was really connected to me and then entered into what is actually, like, a, you know, centuries old tradition of Christians who, because of their faith, are seen in their time and their place as liberal or progressive. Right. Like, that. It's not like a new thing. Like, I'm not unique. There's a whole bunch of us who are liberal christians. And so, I mean, there are definitely some people who are like, no, you're not even a Christian. Because they would look at my theology and my stances on political views and be like, nah, that's not Christian at all. Which is true. Like, Christianity is very diverse, and, like, the reality is, like, there are many faiths with that are in the umbrella of Christian, and they don't really look alike. Right. They don't all look the same. Um, but it is what guides my. My values and my beliefs on a lot of issues. And so, um, when. When I. Yeah, so that's. That's part of my. Of my world. And so, like, my faith moves me. Like, some of the things I'm working on, like, right now, are to be anti racist in the things that. In the way that we present ourselves in the world. And, like, really understand that I have privilege as a white man and that that's something I need to wrestle with and that it's not, you know, that my, my place in the world, it's not bad to be a white man. Like, I'm not worried about that or like, any of those kind of things. But I also am willing to admit the places where I mess up and, and want to say I'm gonna, I'm gonna lean into the fact that there are systemic things that have been benefiting me that are harming other people. So, yeah, I mean, it's interesting to be a pastor in that way, but also, like, the stream that I'm in and the community that I'm in, it's pretty normal. Like, most of my, most of the christians I know and hang out with on this point actually have very similar views on, to me, I've been, we have because of my job. Like, our curriculum is used in churches all over the place, and it's not all people who share the same belief. Right. And so it's very interesting because we have all have very conservative people reading and participating in curriculum that I've written, and they love it and they think it's great. And then when they find out, like, some specific thing about me politically, they're like, oh, this isn't good anymore.

[25:58] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Totally different. Yeah.

[26:00] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah, right. Like, because then you get pigeonholed into.

[26:02] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Whatever, you know, I'm actually, I'm really fascinated by that. Like, that you have a community of fellows that you think are more liberal in their views of religion. Because when I think of religion, I really do feel a heavier conservative tone. And not that I'm turned off by that, but I'm like, how is that even christian? Like, you're already casting judgment before you're even welcoming somebody in because you're so stuck to your conservative values that you're the not really abiding by God's word. So I'm so confused here.

[26:38] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: And I feel like there is a.

[26:39] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Pretty big movement right now, you know, with some of the more, I guess you could call them liberal churches, even the more casual places of worship who are open and accepting of everybody. And, I mean, it makes me happy because I oftentimes, you know, I think about, you know, you can just, you can even go into a church and there are people who show up and they're there every Sunday and they're dedicated to that service. But yet when you see them, you know, in this kind of interaction, are they modeling what they say they believe in?

[27:14] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, we. We. Because we've rooted all of our kind of understanding and faith around that, like, greatest commandment of go and be a good neighbor.

[27:24] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yep.

[27:25] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Um, like, for us, we're like, well, what if that was actually, like, your literal, actual neighbor? Like, it's not just a metaphor to be a nice person. And our literal, actual neighbors often aren't people we go to church with. Like, they're not people who show up on the same. Because I like most christians, they go to church with people who look like them, who make about the same amount of money as them who, you know, I mean, like, it's very. Christians gather with people who are very similar to them, which is. It doesn't challenge us very hard when we just are. Like, it just confirms all the things that I believed are okay. And then I don't need to be different. And, like, that's not what happens in scripture. Like, Jesus sees groups like that and goes in and blows them up and says, like, y'all need to go see some other people who aren't like you and experience this world. And for me, like, that, that's not a Christianity that does super well, necessarily, because it's hard to, like, it's easier just to be, like, to not force people to do hard work, you know?

[28:31] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah, no, I mean, even as you share that, I'm thinking of, like, the churches that I've belonged to growing up on the west side and the churches that are moving out here that I really like. But if we're going to be Ron real about it, I'm looking at them right now in my head and I'm like, yup, they all come from the same neighborhood. That's right around here. So, you know the median household income and where their kids go to school and.

[28:53] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right.

[28:54] STACEY WILLIAMSON: What would it look like if we push the envelope a little bit on that and then.

[28:58] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah, right. And then even what happens is, like, in churches, I mean, and my church is right in that category. To the church I attend regularly is when people show up who don't look like us, we immediately think they're people in need of. And, like, so we have stuff and they don't. Oh, and, oh, come on in, we'll help you. Which is so patronizing and making the assumption. Yeah. Making so many assumptions. And then. I don't know. So we just, we're trying to say every person is gifted, every person has something to offer. And when we discover people's gifts and invite them to use them, they, they experience wholeness when they're using them. And we experience wholeness because the community gets stronger when everybody uses those gifts. And so when you. When you start in that place, it cuts across a lot of political lines. What I hate about our political world right now is if I tell you one thing, like, you're like, oh, well, I. Our family has guns. Oh, well, I know everything about you then. Right. Or I'm pro choice. Well, I know everything about you then. Like, I hate that. And, like, neighboring in this way where we just say, instead of, like, asking those kind of questions, we ask the kind of questions of, what is something you know so well? You can teach somebody what is something you can create or make with your hands? What's something you love to do when you have an afternoon off? Generally, people can connect on those things.

[30:27] STACEY WILLIAMSON: And they're not offensive questions.

[30:29] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Like, people enjoy each other on those kind of moments.

[30:32] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah.

[30:33] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: And once you have that connection, then you can have harder conversations.

[30:36] STACEY WILLIAMSON: If so, absolutely. Connection is everything. I think what it leads to is intent. Right. I always say, you know, assume positive intent unless they've taught you otherwise. Because if you hear every message through positive intent, like, how could you hear it? Poorly.

[30:58] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Right? Yeah. Yeah, that is good. We've talked about that in our household with our kid, of, like, assume that they have good intentions, even if their behavior didn't show that you can hold them accountable for their behavior. But let's assume that the attention is good for sure.

[31:16] STACEY WILLIAMSON: So, on that note, kids, what are you most excited about? And what are you most scared about? Raising kids in today's society.

[31:25] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Oh, God, man. Raising kids is a trip. Like, it's so hard.

[31:33] STACEY WILLIAMSON: The best and hardest thing ever.

[31:35] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah. So our son is ten. He's adopted. We adopted him at birth. But when we. When we did that, we are, before we had Prescott, our son, we were like, we're gonna have as many kids as we possibly can. Then we had one. It was a really hard adoption. It took, like, a year before it was finalized, and we weren't sure we were going to keep them the whole time. It was very expensive, all this kind of stuff. And we were like, never mind, we're having one. We're good. We're done. And I think what I am excited about is I do feel like, you know, with. I see in him now that he's a little bit older, like, he is expressing some of the values that we've really, like, tried to put into his life in a really beautiful way that are his own. And it's not just a mimic or copy of what we've tried to say to him, but it's his own version of it, which is really beautiful. What I'm scared about is so many things. So, I mean, I'm. I look at the world right now, and I'm generally an optimist about most things. When I look at the world right now, I'm like, dang it. Like, this is getting harder and harder to be an optimist. Like, I'm very concerned about the environment, and I'm very concerned about how much war is. Like, you know, like, I never thought. My wife asked me the other day, and I. It really tripped me up. She's like, do you think there'll ever be a draft again? And I would have always said no. I would have always said no. And then, like, in the last year, I'm like, I mean, I don't think so. Like, you know, I don't. Yeah, I don't know. What about, what about you?

[33:14] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Scary. Let's see. Most excited about. I would agree with you. I think ten, our oldest just turned ten, and it's such a cool age from what I'm seeing. This just happened a couple weeks ago, but it's, you know, seeing them really blossom into people with their own values and beliefs and starting to question maybe some of yours and ask some probing questions that sometimes feel challenging, you know? But they're also holding the candle to the fire of saying, well, you've taught me this, you know, so they're. I really like it. So I think it's, in my opinion, the best thing is hopefully raising kind people.

[33:57] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah.

[33:57] STACEY WILLIAMSON: If we all just do our part and bring a little more kindness into this world, the world would be a better place. So that's my goal in life, just raise honest, kind, hardworking people. And the scariest, you know, I think it's just one of those pressing issues right now of, like, the mental health of those around us and the unknowing and knowing how far social media and all the things have really crept into the lives. And we have friends with kids who are, you know, going through some of those tough things. And it's scary. It's really scary because you could be the parent who doesn't know. And I think that's the scariest thing, is, like, how do we protect them and save them and keep them from wanting to harm themselves because others are meant? And so that's, I think, my biggest fear.

[34:47] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah, no, that's totally true. The. The whole, like, that I have to, like, understand social media to understand my kid, which I'm so bad at, like, I'm so bad at social media, and so now I'm gonna have, like, he wants so bad to be on all, like, tick tock and, like, Snapchat and all this stuff. And I'm like, no, you can't have any of it because I don't understand it.

[35:11] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah.

[35:12] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Which works right now when he's ten, but, like, it's not going to be long before he's going to have all that stuff.

[35:18] STACEY WILLIAMSON: We won't let our kids have it either.

[35:20] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Yeah.

[35:21] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Right.

[35:22] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Not yet. That's right. And all, of course, all his classmates, you know, they have it. They're doing all that stuff. And. Yeah, they just had. The fourth and fifth graders at our school just got busted for inappropriate Snapchat group that they were having. And I'm like, you are so young. I can't. I don't understand how to do deal with this as a parent. But, I mean, we do. I do feel good. Like, and I think. I mean, I hear this in the way you're parenting as well. Like, we're just trying to be really honest with him and, like, let's have. Let's talk about weird stuff, you know? Let's. Let's. We've already got to talk about sex at our house, which is really fun.

[36:01] STACEY WILLIAMSON: We're almost there. I think my husband keeps putting it off.

[36:05] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Oh, we didn't want to. He came home with some information that we had to clarify, so I'm trying.

[36:12] STACEY WILLIAMSON: To beat that to the punch. I was like, we want to be able to talk about it before the school does.

[36:17] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: That's right. That's right. We're like, oh, somebody told you that at recess. Let's reframe it in a different way because that's not all accurate. So. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So raising kids is. I think it's super fun. It's so challenging. One of my favorite things at church right now is our parents group. We have a parents group that meets on Wednesday nights, and it's like just all of these parents who just are being really honest with each other about how clueless we feel most of the time as parents. And then. And then it. I don't know, there's like, some kind of, like, really important permission giving when it's. You can all sit around and say, I don't know what I'm doing. And here's the crazy thing that happened at our house this week. And, man, I yelled at my kids so bad this morning. And, yeah, we all do it.

[37:11] STACEY WILLIAMSON: And then walked into work like I've got it all together.

[37:15] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: Absolutely. Absolutely. Yep. I'm totally fine.

[37:20] STACEY WILLIAMSON: No, that's what I think. I fail a lot and just keep going, try to do better the next day.

[37:26] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: That's right. That's right. Well, I mean, I'm excited to get to know you, Stacey. I feel like it's surprising to me that our paths have not already crossed, because nonprofit world in Wichita is not that big.

[37:38] STACEY WILLIAMSON: Yeah. Same. I would love to continue connecting, and I'd love to learn more about the church that you're a part of now and connect, you know, even more. I feel like there's more in our stories that overlap that we don't even have time for.

[37:52] ADAM BARLOW THOMPSON: That's right. Yeah. Absolutely. Well, we'll stay in touch, for sure.