Virginia Eickholt interviewing her Grandmother Joan Rayl

00:01 My name is Virginia Eickholt

00:03 My name is Joan Rayl

00:06 I am 18 years old and today is November 22, 2023. I am speaking with my grandmother and we are in her hometown of Decatur, Alabama.

00:20 Right.

00:22 So when and where were you born?

00:24 Saginaw, Michigan, 1945.

00:33 Do you remember who was president when you were born?

00:36 No, you don't?

00:40 Who's the first president? You remember?

00:42 Eisenhower.

00:45 Of you being alive was Eisenhower. What was your childhood like?

00:54 Lonely.

00:55 Lonely. Can you elaborate on that?

00:58 My mother was a. She was a sole caregiver. My dad had left us and wanted us to be sent to our orphanage. And she was the sole caregiver and worked two jobs, so I spent a lot of time being alone.

01:19 Yeah. What lessons did you learn from your parents?

01:24 That I did not want my children to have that upbringing.

01:29 Yeah. What were your parents political beliefs?

01:35 I.

01:36 You don't know.

01:38 Don't know what my dad's was because.

01:41 Yeah.

01:42 But my mom's probably was more Republican than Democrat.

01:47 Yeah. Would you say yours is similar?

01:50 Oh, yes, definitely.

01:52 Can you tell me a story of how you ended up in Alabama?

01:59 My late husband, James Eickholt was with Saginaw Steeringer and they built a plant in Decay or Alabama and we were transferred along with 26 other families.

02:19 Do you like living in Alabama?

02:21 Yes.

02:22 Do you miss Michigan?

02:24 Oh, yes. When he died, I blew everybody's mind because I stayed. I only have been here six years.

02:33 Why did you stay?

02:35 Because the first thing all the boys asked me after I talked with them about their father passing was do we have to move? And I said no.

02:50 And they didn't want to move?

02:51 No. And my. My family would have just wanted me to just stay in bed till everything passed. So I stayed.

03:07 What was dad like growing up? My dad.

03:12 He was. He was of course my youngest. And he came so early.

03:21 How early?

03:22 Yes, he was a preemie. He was three months early.

03:26 Oh, wow. I didn't even know that.

03:27 And I remember them coming because I had cesareans. I remember them coming in saying, we're going to take you down to see the baby. Well, I never saw my kids still because I had cesareans till 24 hours after they were born.

03:45 You never got to see them?

03:46 No.

03:47 So they just take them and you would see them a day later?

03:49 No, until a day later. And I said, I don't see men. And the first three months he had to have one ounce of formula every three hours and it took him at least an hour to suck it down. So we spent a lot of time Bonding. And I have to say, he probably. I'm closer to him than any of them. He was. His brother used to come with his friends and they would ask him to go out with him because he was a babe magnet. He was probably the most athletic and probably the most well rounded of all of them. But. Yeah, I have a very special place in my heart for your dad.

04:50 Was he good in school? Was he good in school?

04:54 No, girl, I'm not. When he. In fact, when I came to college, we kept him home because he was too involved in girls to be serious. But once he decided that he wanted to be a pharmacist, go to Auburn, everything changed.

05:18 So you think it all worked out? You think it all worked out, like with dad?

05:24 Yes.

05:25 He turned around.

05:26 Yes, I think he turned around. We used to say, I mean, he probably, he. Your dad. Girls were number one.

05:41 Did you expect him to be a pharmacist?

05:43 No.

05:44 Yeah.

05:44 Did I expect him to finish college? No.

05:47 Did you expect him to go to Auburn?

05:50 No. In fact, we fought it. We really did. Because when you say he wanted to go, it's like, really?

06:00 Do you think he just wanted to go to Auburn because of their pharmacy school?

06:04 Yes.

06:05 It's interesting. Do you know why he wanted to be a pharmacist? Just took interest in it.

06:11 No idea. Except it was the first year they offered the doctor of pharmacy.

06:19 So you want to be a doctor.

06:23 And it's not that he wasn't smart enough. He just never applied himself through high school.

06:30 Yeah, I could see that. What have you learned from being a parent?

06:39 From what?

06:40 From being a parent. Just having kids. What have you learned from that?

06:45 They are my greatest joy.

06:48 You don't elaborate on that anymore.

06:51 What have I learned? Oh, so much. You know, if I could do things over again, I would. You know, mistakes were being. Were made, probably. But I still think God's greatest gifts was giving me my children and my grandchildren.

07:18 Did you expect to have all boys?

07:21 No. I want a girl. And God and I will have a talk someday.

07:27 Well, you got plenty of girl grandchildren.

07:29 Yes. The first four were all girls.

07:33 And now dad has three girls. So dad has three girls. I know it flipped on him.

07:39 And the first four were white. Be all boys.

07:45 What key historical events do you remember? Just from your whole lifetime?

07:52 Probably your real grandfather coming back to the rectory and being pulled out of the car.

08:05 Was that the day he died?

08:07 Yeah. And your Uncle Greg was pulled out of the other side. And I just kept screaming, where's Jim? Where's Jim? That probably is so his name was.

08:20 James and he went by Jim.

08:21 Yeah. That was probably the one moment I will never forget.

08:30 How I expect you to.

08:31 Another moment was probably getting a little upset with Dad. I mean, with God a couple years.

08:42 After because of what happened to him.

08:46 Saying, this was your idea.

08:48 Yeah.

08:49 And dad, you know, these boys need a father.

08:56 Yeah. It's hard having three boys.

08:58 And I, you know, I want somebody as good as Jim or Bever, and I'm crying all the way down in the hills. And I said, when I got home, there was a message on my phone. Well, one of the boys told me that one of our mutual friends wanted me to go to dinner with him that night, and that's why I met aj.

09:28 You met him because of that?

09:29 Yeah.

09:31 Do you think he's been.

09:33 He, you know, he's very unlike your real grandfather. Your real grandfather was the life of the party. Outgoing, very like dad and. Yeah. And. But their values are the same. And he really influenced your dad a lot. And I did not want those kids, boys growing up with all a father.

10:02 I get that. Do you remember any, like, events from history? Do you remember any, like, events from history? Like, just big historical.

10:15 Of course, 9 11. Of course, I was too young for Pearl harbor, but 911 probably sticks out.

10:23 Do you remember, like, the JFK assassination?

10:26 Oh, God, yes.

10:27 Do you remember where you were when that happened?

10:29 I don't. You know, I don't remember exactly where I work, but of course I can remember seeing on TV.

10:38 Yeah.

10:38 And everything. But 9 11, I can remember. And I can remember I was working and your Uncle Greg called me. He was just crying.

10:48 He's so sad.

10:49 They just went into the towers.

10:51 That's so sad.

10:52 I knew.

10:55 Yeah. Do you regret not going to college?

11:01 Yes. Well, growing up like I did, the one thing I wanted to be was home for my kids. Yes, I do. But would I have changed? No.

11:27 What moments would you say? Like, define your generation? Like, that can be, like, clothes, trends, movements, what. Just like, what defines your generation? Like, what moments.

11:40 What moment?

11:41 Yeah. Or really anything. Could be clothes, stereotypes, just stuff like that.

11:50 Define my generation, I think 9 11, more than anything. Or the JFK. But.

12:02 What do you think the stereotype is for your generation?

12:06 Ways there. Stereotype?

12:07 Yeah.

12:16 Boy, that's a hard one. What stereotype?

12:21 Just, like, what defines y'all? Because, you know, there's. Do you even know what your generation.

12:27 I think they care more about the United States.

12:30 Yeah.

12:31 And by our country than other generations. And they're worried, really worried about the future. I can See that they don't understand some of the what's going on.

12:48 Do you think you, like, agree with that or do you think you're different?

12:52 Right, I do. I, you know, I, I can't understand why people think that what the terrorists did, like, in Israel is okay. Yeah, I really don't understand that. Or why people are so upset that they. I mean, grant you, I fought for the abortion bill. I think it should have happened. But at the same time, if they turn it back to the States, I don't know why people are so upset.

13:31 A lot of hate going on.

13:33 I mean, I would never get an abortion, but at the same time, I would not demonize anyone for having one. I had good friends who want to go to a back alley person and.

13:51 Get one, and that's so dangerous.

13:52 And I, you know, I sat here with Father McDay, our priests, who really got me through your grandfather's death, and just argue the fact that, you know, you know, I could not say you can't have an abortion.

14:13 Yeah. Do you have any concerns for my generation, I hope.

14:23 Yeah, I have a lot of concerns. I hope you have the beautiful life we have had. And I'm. Yeah, I'm worried about what our country is leading to.

14:43 Yeah.

14:43 I want you to have all the opportunities and all the gifts we can wear. We have.

14:49 Yeah. I know we already talked about college and if you regretted that or not, but do you have any other regrets that don't relate to that?

15:02 Oh, Barb. Oh, my God.

15:06 You could do everything. All I want.

15:08 Do I have everything? Other regrets?

15:12 Big ones.

15:13 I wish. So I probably have a lot of regrets. Oh, yes. If I could redo my youth or my young teenage years where I was looking for love in all the wrong places, if I could redo that. Yes, I have a lot of regrets if I'm so blessed by God. But at the same time, I think I wish I could be more outgoing as far as giving to people and just.

16:08 Yeah. God's plan is definitely. I said God's plan is definitely. God's plan is definitely hard to understand sometimes.

16:18 Yes.

16:19 You have to trust because everything works out like you said. So this is for my AP Micro class. So with that in mind, do you have any money managing or economic tips that you'd like to share with me?

16:39 No, because Grandpa does it all. So marry someone that I just spent.

16:46 I'll probably be the same way, but. Well, you. You were a single mom for a good bit. You were a single mom for a good bit. How'd you manage that money wise?

16:59 Probably not good, because whatever the kids want that I gave them, I mean, they could talk me into anything, just like my grandkids could.

17:11 Yeah, they.

17:12 They literally talked me into. Yes, I did not major as well as I should.

17:19 Yeah. When you were a single mom, what was your job? Did you have a job?

17:25 No.

17:27 How'd you, like, pay for stuff?

17:29 I. I volunteered a lot, but I did not have a job.

17:32 Yeah, well, that's a blessing to be home with your kids. I said that's a blessing to be home with your kids and not have to worry.

17:41 Yeah, that's the one thing I wanted.

17:45 Yeah. Okay, this is my last question, but I'm about to go off to college. You know, I'm a senior. So do you have any advice for me since I'm about to be living on my own?

17:57 Oh, I have so much confidence that you'll do well in whatever you choose. Just live your dreams, girl.

18:14 I really want to trust in.

18:16 Yes, I trust you. You. Because you have two great parents. And I guess the one thing, if anything, I have all three boys. Well, one, two have children. They are great dads and they have raised good kids. And that's all I want and care for.

18:46 Well, that's because of you. Because you were a good mom. You raised three good moments.

18:51 Because I know your parents have done a good job. And you are. I'm so proud of you. I mean, you were. We thought you were gonna be your dad's payback.

19:06 I will say I think I've turned around also.

19:08 And you have. And you are. I can't wait to see what you're gonna become. And I hope I'm able to see you. I better be able to see God. I will.

19:31 Have I told you what I'm majoring in yet?

19:34 No.

19:35 Pre vet.

19:39 Really?

19:39 Yeah.

19:41 Instead of vet.

19:42 Well, pre vet. It's like the four year.

19:45 What?

19:46 The four year before vet school.

19:49 My hairdressers. I guess their son has just graduated a couple two one year ago and he. He was in pre med and now is.

20:02 Oh, pre vet. Oh, urine prevent.

20:05 Yeah, I know. Who knows you're gonna be a fan.

20:12 You're unexpected. Well, thanks for doing that with me.

20:18 I love you, girl.

20:21 I love you too.