Anne Matava and Randi [No Name Given]

Randi (R) and Anne Matava (AM) introduce themselves

R asks AM to talk about why she wanted to participate in a One Small Step (OSS) conversation.

R reads AM’s bio and asks about being raised by Catholic parents who were committed to peace and justice, and their relationship to abortion. AM talks about historical context.

AM reads R’s bio and asks about gender identity.

R talks about his road to identifying as nonbinary and trans.

R talks about language used around gender identity, how for elders the majority of language widely available were medical diagnoses.

R asks AM about who had the biggest influences on her life.

AM talks about her parents’ influence, “Any good qualities that I have, it's totally from being raised by those two incredible people.”

AM tells a story about being lonely in a new town. “Oh, Annie, we mustn't judge.”

R talks about how while there is religious trauma in LGBT communities there are also many queer people who are religious.

AM asks R who has had the most influence on him. R talks about his parents, growing up low-income with disabled parents in recovery. AM notes her own struggles with mental health and having a partner who is disabled, and how she identifies with R’s experiences.

R asks AM to describe her personal political values. AM talks about terminal objectivity and how despite having liberal leanings she doesn’t want to take sides. She mentions some more conservative stances/concerns she holds, on immigration, for example.

R talks about being in community with people who are angry at moderates.

AM asks R to describe his personal political values. R talks about equity, community, and caring. He talks about multigenerational living and communities helping each other. He responds to AM’s comments about the immigration crisis and talks about the challenges that come with such a crisis, as well as homelessness and the societal ills that cause these issues.

AM says she is encouraged to hear a young person saying such things.

R talks about little wins and politics on the local level, the importance of having a small lens, and how he believes that the arc is upward.

AM talks about the serenity prayer.

R talks about how a lot of his peers are terminally online and plugged in and how important he thinks it is to be in relation with people and places offline. He talks about how isolated he’s been at times and how he’s learned that he thrives when not isolated, how he wants to help people not feel so isolated.

R asks if AM ever feels troubled by people with the same beliefs and how they communicate those beliefs to others.

AM says she does feel troubled by this and shares a story about her friendship with a custodian at the last school she worked at, how listening to someone can be more impactful than yelling at them.

Participants talk about shouting vs. listening and how it’s much easier to simply listen when your basic rights aren’t being threatened. R talks about prejudice against trans people and how much misinformation is circulating about them. He mentions the historical context around anti-trans and anti-gay rhetoric, book banning, and fear and how important it is to have conversations to better understand people.

AM says she’s not prejudiced against trans people but if she were, she would have been won over by R.

R talks about how they have different life upbringings but share many of the same values and how many ways there are to become empathetic, caring humans.

AM talks about how beneath our skin, muscles, blood, and political ideologies, we all have the same fears and needs and how that’s the level she wants to be on. R agrees.

AM asks R about his hopes for the future. R talks about more conversations like One Small Step happening, and more togetherness.

R asks AM if there’s anything she learned about him today that surprised her. AM talks about how grateful she is to learn more about R’s upbringing and how he became the person he is. She talks about being grateful to learn more about trans and nonbinary identity from R’s perspective. How she’s always been curious but didn’t know where to learn more and has been afraid to ask.

AM asks if anything about her surprised R. R talks about appreciating AM’s perspective on moments in history he’s read about or learned about in history class, how much more nuanced the past proves to be when you have anecdotes and personal stories.

R asks AM what her hopes for the future are. AM talks about hoping for unity. How she often thinks that there will be more of a crash/hitting the bottom before coming back up. She mentions preferring R’s vision for the future, without a crash.

R talks about having the eternal optimism of youth on his side.

AM says R should run for office and how she would vote for him.