Jesse McNulty and Tommy

00:09 This is Sir Jesse McNulty of Decatur age is 42 almost 43 today's date is September 25th 2010. Where in Atlanta relationship to?

00:28 What I say

00:33 Yikes, can we start over?

00:39 42 February 25th, 2010 Atlanta and I'm interviewing a chosen family member.

00:48 Hi, my name is Tommy age 26 today's date, February 25th location, Atlanta relationship.

00:58 To my chosen family

01:02 Okay. So the first question I'd like to ask you is what is your first memory of me?

01:09 Hey guess who goes back to 7th grade? My first memory of you is wearing dad football jersey shirt. I believe was why and the has blue letters.

01:24 And I'll can remember that you were walking in the hallway with school really fast back and forth back and forth because I always see you walk in the hallway. So that is my first memory of you.

01:40 And what was yours my first memory of you?

01:53 But I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say or not say but the counseling office had thought that you and I would be a good match for mentor-mentee and

02:05 So I guess I thought a lot about you before I met you is why I'm going there cuz you know, I can see it when I met you. You're pretty much 7th grade dude from Vietnam. And I guess she was looked about like I thought you looked like any other seventh-grade dude.

02:30 So what do you think of our friendship?

02:36 Or our relationship as a chosen family so far.

02:41 But I expect to know you to one of us decides.

02:47 To move now. I know you then I guess I was trying to say until one of us isn't here anymore. But that isn't how to say that.

03:00 I guess I don't know what to say about that. I'm expecting a right. It's a family means, you know somebody forever. So I don't know expect to know you forever and I I know you for more than half my life. So.

03:19 You know, you are the biggest part of my life and

03:25 And that's why we hate talking today.

03:31 Why do talk a little bit about how you inspired me Mary? That's better than like your first my first memory of you is kind of like I remember you had on orange and black plaid with white button down shirt. You like to wear shorts got a bag in like all the 7th graders then and now for that matter.

03:56 I can say you did inspire me to stand up to my workplace because I don't know how much you want to tell about your situation with.

04:10 I realized that to assert my whole identity at work was necessary because it would just didn't feel right being called one thing at work and something else at home. So

04:25 Yeah, I know how deep I ain't going into that but you're inspired me to do a whole lot at my job and I had already decided to dedicate my life to the service of Youth but you took it I guess to a little different level cuz I just

04:40 I was kind of amazing to me that died young folks can.

04:47 Know a lot about themselves and have a need for understanding adults in a world full of hostile and

04:56 Somewhat disrespectful adults. So yeah SAU is burn me to do a lot of with myself and to continue on to my joint.

05:10 He's fine to help with some groups there. And then the Georgia state schools Coalition was another important thing that came out of Youth. Advocacy for me. I'll be on the school house or so.

05:25 Well, that's certainly something that you know, I didn't think about why I realize it later on that, you know, someone who's younger and less-experienced but different experience.

05:45 Like I'm well, I'm just going to say that.

05:51 Well being able to inspire someone else has a huge in them.

05:56 Certainly been younger than you are.

06:00 Yeah, I miss may I hear you? That's the exciting part for me. I have know that there's empowered youth that, you know are afraid to not just be who they are, but

06:17 Expect some adult somewhere to be a rational. So it was nice that you look to me as a rational person in the world. That wasn't feeling very well for a lot of Youth and including myself, you know a lot of times when when you don't get to be who you are and your entire day and you kind of start over in a useful State at whatever age you're at. I feel like I have never

06:44 Never closed my ears off to use telling me anything. I feel like they have a lot of raw truth that can be accessed. If you just listening like one of my biggest Heroes, you know, I was talking about John Lewis. The reason he was such a hero to me is because he was the youngest person to speak at the 1963. I Have a Dream speech famous, March on, Washington.

07:11 And he had a lot to say and I he was told to tell him that tune it down a little bit and he drove on and he's still working today past retirement age as a congressman making a big difference in laws and

07:26 Also two things he still doing so I just feel like we start young and continue down a path of creating Beloved Community behind you. The world's really lucky to have had you on board early early on helping with that process. So I really find used to be heroes in your hero dude right there.

07:53 So

07:55 Do you have any goals for me or what would you like for me to do in the next 5 years?

08:05 I think it's chosen family.

08:10 It's funny cuz he thought when you were still in high school, I knew not to ask too much about what your next step for it. But then sometimes you know, I supposed to ask you if so is a delicate dance for me about what do I expect I expect you to take care of yourself and be healthy and follow your calling which I know you don't know how much you'll share about that eventually with me you're calling because it's serious so bad that you're going down and I'm excited for you. I expect you'll do well at whatever you decide to do, but it seems like you're

08:44 Do not get things right now. So I'm here was a child and I didn't have any guidance from my own parents. I guess you can say they're very self-centered people have never do anything or anybody but themselves.

09:00 And I'm so you know, the reason we're wish that we've been friends for so long because

09:07 It's certain things. I just can't go to them because I know that I won't get the guidance or device. Can we we have a heart-to-heart conversation cuz I know deep down they really don't care about me.

09:24 And I still question that Tuesday.

09:28 Inside of them

09:30 To me choosing someone to be your family is much more important than some and one year.

09:39 Kim West

09:43 I agree. I think biology is overrated a lot of time. So my family my parents. Yeah, that would take an hour and a half to even begin to scratch the surface, but my family has survived suicide depression. I guess they they can heart attacks different things on my parental unit side. But yeah, I felt like a early on I was going to have to make a way for myself to I can identify with that. Maybe that's why we click the way we did.

10:24 But I value my chosen family a lot has my blood family is about 850 miles north of blood family all over right eye with the world.

10:39 Find me thankful to have you.

10:42 I don't like to think about you moving away.

10:56 So and passionately done a lot of activism that include traveling to Washington DC for the year 2004 the game in March and we did our first true trans man.

11:14 Set up my alarm at the one in 2000 was a blast after they I know we still high school.

11:35 Event, I have to say.

11:37 Wait, we're up against a bunch of hate groups, which was interesting but then your marching we realized that the only like glbtq organization that was really represented was the HRC. It was all their signs all their people. So we're a little bit like huh? And that's when we decided to make it the two trans Man March because we need to educate those people marching parade are seeing a lot of them were unaware that transgender was not covered in their mission statement at that time and everybody knew that they weren't covering a thunder and the Employment non-discrimination Act which was done quite a few.

12:18 Now you and I activism here in Atlanta about that too. But that was interesting. So we were.

12:25 Sat on the sidelines hollering at the HRC people. Remember the toes keep moving. All right, so that we find some of that hateful people told him we need rights to what it was fun of educating the HRC folks about the bottom where it was really surprised. Remember, I mean it. We're covered.

12:47 Yeah, I guess I was my first big March and what experience some I didn't I didn't dawn to me at a time that we would have to transmit marching later on. I realize it was that a time. I was just going with the flow important things and things like speeches. It's beautiful day.

13:16 So thank you for bring me to the world of activism and know how to stand up for oneself and others others have done. So for us so

13:35 There's always something a little bit magical about going to DC. I mean, it's a colonial weirdness of white buildings and the cameras in Atlanta manicured grass. So it was like being in a strange world and it was really cool to share that with you that made it really exciting for me cuz you can easily be weirded out as an activist over there. So I think that we just had so much fun. We rode all over town and our bicycles member.

14:13 What do you think about it? Not that not that long before?

14:19 It's funny cuz you didn't get hurt.

14:28 But let me say one more time. It was the two trans Man March on Washington, DC 2000.

14:36 And I was still waiting to pass Enda correctly.

14:42 I'm in Florida. Now, you're about to be in Florida. Hope you're doing your course work will be done in a year.

14:56 But we're still going to fight for the rights of others to have jobs.

15:06 Do you think you're doing that everyday? What's your

15:10 Students at school fighting for them

15:17 Get the rest system.

15:20 Most definitely I tell you I am I trending today the opening question, you know that Icebreaker and they said what if you had magic wand what would you do with it? And it's funny cuz there was like 30 people in there and I was the last to go so everybody had taken all that we do I get more wands or give it to someone who really needs it all this. So I got to me and I said well, I would like to make it instantly possible for everyone to speak Spanish as well as any other language host language of the

15:56 Student encounter, so I guess I would be able to be Vietnamese Vanishing all over in the county at working. So that would be a handy superpower. But also I said I would like to provide a safe School environment for all lgbtq situated youth.

16:19 And what I mean by that is, you know any kids.

16:24 You know has knowledge of lgbtq for sure needs to feel safe and kids are not aware. I mean need to grow up in an environment where you know, two people who are situated that way or questioning that way are respected and valued.

16:45 So that's a long way to talk about this when I was at this morning, but really that's not what I do at work and think it's try to advocate for my specifically my Latino students.

17:01 And I I'm going to actually go see the trail of Dreams students that are Marching up from Miami.

17:08 They're they're coming through town next week or this weekend. Actually Saturday. Did you hear that before kids inside kids are high schoolers. They're trying to raise awareness for the

17:24 Trail of Dreams

17:26 Do you have the laws call them?

17:30 The DREAM Act and the DREAM Act is I wish I knew who the main points to tell you, but basically so that Latino students are discriminated against in trying to have access to college or can you even like community colleges and not being allowed to go in at 4 not documented?

17:49 So, I mean it's a whole lot of Rights and he can have it for Latinos anyway.

17:54 But yes, I like to advocate for them and then because of the area I teach.

18:01 Yeah to teach kids with special needs.

18:06 I didn't teach kids to do at home.

18:09 And sometimes it might be testing off the charts and gifted but they've got you know.

18:16 Situations where

18:18 And I never the resilience amazes me. So I mean we deal with a lot of

18:24 At risk youth in, Georgia

18:26 It's a big challenge. So now I'm working at right now. It's funny because one test scores came back. The special needs kids are the one who did better than the general my kids. And so so teachers are having a second thought about taking more special needs into the classroom classroom because it would improve school and this is funny to me because they're the one who the special needs or want to going around carrying the labels and being bully being shoved make fun of but they're actually the ones who is going to make the school looks even brighter.

19:10 And I'm yeah, I like to think that even though they mad that might have labels is disabled, but I just think that they have

19:25 I can make them shy for sure.

19:29 They're very resilient. I mean, I guess what I'm in school today, actually the training over to we were surfing tests court all day long. He's a program that lets you configure all these reports and comparisons and all this and I was thinking about that.

19:48 How

19:50 Everything so tescor focused and the presenter said something like you know why you can look at your two years. So, you know, they're having a bad year and I said well, maybe they're being molested. Let me know it's be sort of things happen and Elementary and Middle School. It said it never appears next to the test score in their transcripts that you know, I'm not that it should but my thing is with the statistics of where they are on the number of Youth abused in Georgia, and then a number of other sexually sexual abuse occurs the prevalence there, you know.

20:25 I don't know. I wish there were more serious about screening for mental health care or situational Healthcare then benchmarking and what facts do retaining.

20:37 Enough with screened for market for dummies. I like that.

20:44 Seems more of a crucial data to me, but

20:51 Oh, yeah, there goes right now. It's still have the kids pass or crgt. So subjects such as language and literature science math.

21:05 But that has been more important because

21:13 Programs like arts and social studies and such. I have some

21:21 I'm cruciatus going.

21:27 Janice that's what you and I are both going through. Oh, yeah, that's something for you getting into teaching because I know you'll find a way to integrate fart Civil Right.

21:38 Sort of a social studies discussions and things kind of like threads no matter what we're teaching. We can always work in some Beloved Community and Artful activism.

21:52 So happy ads

21:55 George is about to get some Morgan teachers.

22:06 Let me ask you.

22:09 So what are your dreams for the children that you're going to be teaching?

22:13 Are the ones you teach now?

22:17 Rid of my dreams for them is to

22:20 Get to experience something similar to my experience is to have a role model.

22:30 Someone who some Lookout action distance to keep in touch with them and

22:38 Really see them?

22:46 Sedum

22:49 2 m to grow and flourish

22:54 You know and many different ways and I just went away.

23:00 Have a healthy mind and

23:07 Also be responsible.

23:13 Part of

23:14 Being Human

23:19 Do you have to teach him to be human these days sometimes the brutalize at home and by the media there and my goes for them my goals for them are just

23:30 2

23:39 But I'm

23:43 It's for them to try different things and do to be exposed.

23:49 Too many different skills and knowledge and

23:56 It's from there that can really do what I want to do.

24:06 Yes, they're marigolds to come but that's it for now.

24:10 It's for them to be unique in.

24:13 Have some self determination.

24:16 In

24:18 Those are my goals for my students.

24:25 That's why I was right down like on this phone today after patient empowered teacher cuz that's one thing we got to stay in power so we can help Empower them.

24:37 Yeah, they're always willing to take whatever energy we have for them.

24:42 That's that's the one thing that I've probably could get that right maybe is.

24:48 Save a little bit of myself for me and being a more empowered sometimes that you're not tired myself out so much.

24:57 How you going to stay in power if once you start running all over?

25:02 I mean you doing it now, but when you're up.

25:06 Teaching in

25:08 So how about the family business and all that you going to be able to have all that energy? Keep going. I'm going to focus on my school work or school job.

25:22 Awesome. That's why I see myself and the next 2 years cuz I know I'm still getting through college and

25:32 No, I'm not going to.

25:35 Yeah, waste energy them something else. I care nothing about.

25:39 I mean like the weekend job working for a bunch of whiny privilege.

25:49 Are you know how to ask about that? Cuz I've been somewhat protective of you. Although I'm not very effectively I feel like you've been overworked since you were running out very young and you will.

26:01 But you know if you've got a really strong work ethic to so I know you are you enjoying working hard at whatever you're doing, so

26:10 I know I guess it's part of the powertrain is just to put your all in everything you do and I know you do so I worry about you touching yourself then and you're going to work and I'm always trying to Advocate children and

26:25 Play people in people with disabilities cuz that population I'm working with on the weekends there. They just have no idea about the the world outside cuz they're stuck to their they're stuck in their bubble when their comfort zone and everything else is Sim so inferior to them or less important.

26:54 Some of them will like it had a I was telling about me going to lobby for the anti-trafficking law.

27:03 In Georgia, and and what it is is something that women incarcerated women and prison are shackle by Denny's in the bellies and the rest when they are in labor.

27:17 And a bunch of us think that was inhumane because lots of time when they are restrained like that. They just just don't have the strength and I guess I'm on the way there little freaked out and so when it comes to giving birth their kids her dead.

27:40 So so we Lobby and we we spoke to some senators and representative and I took an educate them.

27:50 I'm a half of incarcerated women women in general.

27:55 And most of them just have no clue.

27:59 Play the never heard of crackling and then that never occurred to them. These are my two legislators are the people at your job you were talking to I was I was telling you I guess my clients what was going on and and most of them are women and they ignore what I was saying as of they were in denial like pretending that they didn't hear when I say, so I repeat myself to agree with me in 7 on but you know, I was just really testing that group of people and how much they don't care.

28:46 Butter beans

28:51 Annum

28:52 So that's a population. Are you stay away from?

28:56 I got one of those is it the one thing he challenges me as a teacher when I have that kid kid from a privileged home. I have to check myself and it's not that I have an extra hostilities I have to do with those parents will have the privilege obliviousness that is with the child and have to recognize it. This child is at a disadvantage for not having the depth of the soul to know about other people's circumstances, and I guess that's where you know, like I said my account my biggest challenge a lot of times is dealing with those particular families, but you'll end up having to deal with some of that some of it.

29:36 But you'll have a broad range of students to deal with so that's something to think about.

29:48 Well, if I can add to what you said about the lobby day you went to I didn't get to go because it happened while I was at school spark reproductive Justice was the one that was hosting the reproductive Justice education of the legislators and everything. They're also the folks that came out of the watch for womens with the walk for women's lives in DC when they came back here if it was used to be Georgia's for choice and they changed over to this park mainly cuz with dealing with the reproductive reproductive justice issues.

30:31 Reproductive justice issues that have to do with everything you're saying about health care in

30:38 The prisons and even just having more choices of the types of

30:45 Labor and Delivery abortion is also in the mix of the reproductive justice, but it's bands much wider than that. So I'm glad to do in that I'm glad you were there doing that. And that's the one thing I feel empowered about 2 is when I know there's activists and we're shoulder-to-shoulder, you know, when you can't be that somewhere I feel you there and I feel like when you're somewhere a piece of me is a piece of me is there too so I always feels good to know. We were going to be everywhere.

31:17 And we were there where were was small as group because looking around you saw a bunch of lobbyists and their fancy, press suits and their Pro shiny jewelry and

31:35 But why were there where we're just felt like I needed to be done. And you know, I'm a couple of let's later came out and took her hands and they say that they thank us for being there because without us they would never hear of things like such.

31:58 And I'm and that is something I hope to do for my students later on for many laws.

32:09 There are going to come up.

32:19 There's one question. I want to make sure we answered speaking for we know.

32:27 And how would you like to be? Remember? I think that's a good question.

32:32 I like to be memories thoughtful person.

32:37 Is someone always smile and

32:46 Remind me to memorize and individuals done.

32:52 Small increments of

33:01 Activism everyday and reaching out to others.

33:13 Back and forth

33:21 Well

33:23 Funny since I go by my government name and it day and fizzle Jessie by night. I guess I need to remember a couple different ways probably but mainly as a Fierce 2 feminist figures feminist feminist Outlaws.

33:41 But definitely I use Advocate and an artist. So all these other identities and things and activism are doing mean it's all important to me, but really just being a youth Advocate and a fierce feminist system.

34:00 Probably about it for me.

34:04 Quit being nice to be nice be nice to me. So I guess the in the dream of a Beloved Community. Everybody would be nice. So

34:16 To be nice if we can all remember each other that way maybe we can attain that.

34:28 How do you want to be remembered by her students?

34:37 Well, I like to remember as

34:40 I don't know where Eddie person.

34:44 Who's look very different from the rest of my students, but have a

34:54 Come and go and go is be there for one another because without them.

35:01 I will need to go to school to teach.

35:05 And

35:07 They need me at the same time because you know beside from being a mandatory.

35:16 Things go to school, but they need to see other ethnicities to hear.

35:25 Other

35:27 Experiences

35:30 And

35:33 I want them to remember me for

35:40 For being there for him.

35:52 And imma throw my family ties won't start.

36:01 I guess I want to be remembered as someone who really cares about them. Sometimes too much at 10 to take over the task and decisions, but I'm

36:17 I just want to be remembered as someone who's

36:22 Have a personalized of private life, but

36:27 Well, we'll give some of that up just to.

36:32 Be there for family.

36:39 And that is more because it's my choice.

36:43 Dragon

36:47 Can I come?

36:51 And that is over my choice then it's what they wanted me to do.

36:59 I'm leaving my family will remember me as trying to encourage Beloved Community and a transient world.

37:07 I guess that's the oldest of four kids. I know that's why I was trying to do for me young age, but I kind of found my way and you were a big part of some of the pivotal moments of that. So I'm very grateful. You sad to come down here today.

37:26 And thank you for

37:28 Play My Life.

37:32 We will have many more stories to tell.

37:39 When you're a grumpy old, man.

37:49 Yeah, I just so you know that I would do anything for you.

37:58 Wouldn't you know, I see us grow growing old together. I hope so like you to move on to my straightener. Maybe I'm about to yours when you find a street you like.

38:15 And I'll call the sack or something.

38:18 Or you can stay in the basement.

38:25 Your are pretty neat and tidy guy. So probably in approvement over some of what I had going on.

38:34 Austin called The Fear Factor room.

38:44 I'm just real thankful. You've stayed in my life because really you moved out and moved here and there a little bit and I'll really required both of us to stay in touch with a long time of not seeing each other, but we always pick up or relieve off and that's how we figured out where family I Think. I Love You Tommy