Dale Nixon and Robert Erb

00:01 Good afternoon. I'm Dale Nixon. I'm 72 years of age. Today's date is Monday. September 20th, 2021. And we're in Wilmington, North Carolina, my interview and partner is Robert Erb. He's also my neighbor and good friend.

00:26 Hello, my name is Robert Erb. I am 74 years old and today is Monday, September 20th. Recording location is Wilmington, North Carolina, and I'm interviewing with my neighbor and good friend, Dale Nixon.

00:43 But we'd like to think about Robert, you and I've been neighbors. Now for 14 years and it's gone, lightning speed, fast, and recovered, an awful lot of grass. Like, I like to do today, is just talk a little bit about that Journey you. And I've been on both in our historic, Restorations of our homes and neighborhood and the same time, the Friendship, we built over that same time. Okay, with it. I'm fine with that. Tail might be helpful. Just to give a little background on what got you want me to?

01:23 Okay, I was approaching retirement and late 2003 and I was assuming my wife. And I, and we were assuming that we would stay in New Jersey because we had two sons in high school. And we had one son, who would come to UNCW the previous year, our oldest son, who'd come to Wilmington told us that we should sell the house and accept the buyout offer and move to Wilmington because he thought it would be the perfect place for us to retire. We had met just got his about this you might imagine but that's what I initially got us to Wilmington and he also thought that living in a historic home downtown, would provide a very friendly outgoing place for us to live since? We'd be newcomers because there were so many people living from all around the country in different places. So that's really what got us down to Wilmington 2004.

02:24 And what's the you purchase a home. A couple years before we got here is a historic home. It's an italianate. Victorian style. It was built in 1871, which is the same year that your house tail was built. They're both built at the same time with the same Builders Etc. But it was it was probably 90% finished in terms of Renovations. The previous owner had worked on the house for 10 or 11 years renovating it with his wife and it wasn't finished but it was in its early and livable good livable condition. So if you're going to move there, bring two high school kids, it had to be something we could move into and live in right away. We couldn't move in and start renovating. So we did that in the summer of 2004.

03:24 And both of my younger son's went to New Hanover High School that following month. I started in August of 2004 and subsequently graduated from then from there.

03:36 And you what brought you to Wilmington 07. And this was the culmination of a multi-year search for quotes. A ripe historic home. My job took me around the Southern States and Canada, and we've been to a lot of locations and my wife at always wanted an old historic home and do my job, as usually in the location for 34 years. And these were using, very small communities primarily in the southern part of the United States. And it just wasn't propriate at that time. To go buy a big old home and commit to fixing it up in a two or three-year. It just wouldn't

04:36 I just couldn't do it with the new job. I would have in each location. So I kept promising path. That we would get her that home. When are retired. She could find a home. That's the only thing we have started a multi-year search her on the internet looking in every Southern State. And we what we were after was a home. That was in an area that was protected from with covenants that we didn't want all the historic home next to a funeral home. But didn't want to store next to a gas station. Unless, you know, many, many of the small communities over the whole selfies, part of the country. That's what's happened over the years is the old home, still stand, but development is covered all around. The next one. We're at we were after something akin to Maybury.

05:30 Okay. Now not withhold as the drunk and not with Floyd the Barber but with a closeness of and and Wilmington after Lisa a three-year intensive search fit that bill and that's what got us here. We have 200 city blocks of designated historic homes on the national register, throat of the turn of the century before the turn of the century and just different time periods. And it really had a lot of good things going for it in the city and force, the restrictions on Codeine know, building codes and send what you could and couldn't do in that all appeal to a lot of them don't like that. That's what we were looking for. Is that sort of protection of whatever we did in home.

06:28 So don't we bought a house right next door to you was always a single-family home. It didn't ever really been chopped up into apartments or whatever. It was leaving ready, but really hadn't changed since 1870. It was pretty much everything was still there so much. Last, your walls, everything was there, and that's exactly what we're looking for. And it was a sunny day in Wilmington and everyone was happy and it was a fair going on or something that day, maybe a spring festival and it just clicked and Cat walk to the home and turned around and gave me a thumbs up and said, she'd been watching this home for three years. And I would love to say that we were anywhere near that methodical or organized after our son, Matthew contact us after being in at UNCW for 3 or 4 months. He's simply called and said, Dad, I know.

07:28 Oh, that. Yeah, your company is offering you a management buyout. This is the place for you and Mom to retire. And so he said, I really think you should put the house on the market, sell it and and move down here quite a shock to us to have him. Say this, you know, we were not thinking that way at all. He said is I said before he he liked the idea of us living downtown because there were people from all over you. No not so people were used to welcoming new people. He said we needed an old house with the black plaque, which meant that the house was over 100 years old. I think I told him I didn't need a black black. He said, oh no, you do because we're Old House people now. Dale, you and Pat obviously realize that you world housing people. I didn't know. We were old house. People. My son told told me that we were, he said you thought you were just old.

08:28 We are all old house people, the boys and I am and you, and Mom, when we are in an old house. We react very differently. We love the architecture. We just love the uniqueness of them and everything. So he had actually interviewed some Realtors and it starts zeroing in on houses for us. So we thought we better get down here before. He buys one for us or something. So, we came down look to the number of houses made several trips. And finally, when we saw the house that we subsequently purchased it. It really worked for us in terms of what I said before. The, the boys being able to move in and start living there right away. So it was not a really well-thought-out plan decision. It was just something that we thought about pretty quickly and it seemed to make sense. We did love the neighborhood. We live. We like the

09:27 Business to the river. And that's a setup that we'd had a New Jersey. We were just like a block from the river navesink river. And so there were a lot of things that were similar. And so we just decided on the drive home. I said, are you willing to turn the page and go to next chapter? In our lives? And an said, yes, and I said, okay, then we're in and we bought the house then started Living in in Wilmington. Didn't know a lot about restrictions or any of that sort of stuff, just kind of learned, as we went, that, you were two years ahead of us. That, that was part of our decision for buying is here. We had this vision of a gas station next to a home. And here was your beautiful home that you would already spent a couple of years working on that was fresh. And the paint was your yard was manicured and it just it just sort of hate. That's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. And we have that that's been watching for

10:27 Years that the relief that really helped, you know, seal the deal. It's not very often. I would buy a home on the spot. Yes, nor would I so it is kind of interesting that to people like us who came from such different backgrounds. I mean you from Canada and then through the South and and working for the different paper companies in all that sort of thing for sweet and me coming from a corporate position in Manhattan. Originally from California that we would, we would both make a decision which ended up us being right across the fence from each other, and that we were going to be spending our retirement together. Our two families would be right next to each other, on the other side of a fence from each other. For so many years. It just never seems very unlikely to me, but it. That's where we are.

11:27 Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, you know, when you think about it, you know, I remember are on the porch to be outside in the car. Right? And you popped over immediately popped over within the first hour of us being there. And we started talking like you still had, you know, with the realtor to hardly departed and you're there and that you started to give us some Council about the neighborhood right on the spot number that. Yeah, I do. Remember. Well, what I remember is that you were walking acting Pat and the realtor will walking down the driveway together. I think what's your second visit to that house in Wilmington and then you were a little bit behind and I came I came out the back and and was over by the fence and we greeted each other introduced ourselves.

12:25 And I I said, are you the new owners of the house? And you said, well, I'm not quite sure because there's another house that we also like and we're just trying to decide which house to get and I didn't really know much about the house. The other house that you were interested in, but I said to you, well, I will just give you the advice that my wife gave me and that is if you have a choice and you can be on the river side of 3rd Street so that you don't have to cross this busy street. That's the way to go. So take the hats of our houses, were on the river side of they're right next to each other. And that's the that's just a suggestion. I threw out. And you said well, okay. Well, think about that or something and you went down the driveway and

13:10 I guess that was some other aspects of the house, Legend to get that one over the other one, potential name, come up and start talking on the first day. We moved in with Community. Let alone giving us some counsel and in a very friendly way. Now you do not boisterous or trying to sell something the wrong way our fences. So, when when we bought the house, there was a remnant of an old brick fence. That was still there. It was a small section. But mainly, the fence was a latticework type fences, I recall and it was on its last legs, and I don't know if it had fallen down before you.

14:10 At the house or with our fell down after you purchase it but it's on the porch. And so the backyards and now we're completely open, and it was, it was kind of a ugly situation back there and you wanted to extend the, the Old Brick, the style of the old brick fence down to replace where it, it had been before and and then continue down to the sidewalk with it with a nice wooden section. So that led to a sharing the cost of these two fences and I was more than happy to let you take the lead on that. And, you know, look for brick masons and stuff. I recommended somebody that I had used and then you look for some people but we share the cost of that and then we got to the the part farther down, the driveway that would separate our two driveways and some post. You put some post in and I didn't know if the

15:10 We're finished post or whatever, but they seemed hi to me and our, our driveway so much narrower, and I, and I asked you about it. And I said, he said no, those, I think that's where the fence is going to go. And I said, Dale, this, this would create like, a tunnel effect on our driveway because it would make it. So narrow are the feeling would be sown so near. So the interesting thing about that there was that our first reaction was that each of us win in our house and got our tape measures and we said, let's just go walk around the neighborhood. Let's go together and look at fences and see what we like. Let's look at some styles of a Pat had kind of settle on a style which is it was his beautiful, but let's look at Styles and let's look at Heights and how they're organized and everything and see what we like and we did that we walked around and if we saw something that we thought would work between our two houses. We took some measurements and all of that and came back and did this Beautiful Pain?

16:11 And then the topic of a guy I don't know. I'm not really sure how the topic of the gate came up, but we one of us or whatever recommended that, we put a gate in that fence so that we could go back and forth between each other's yards and it it's a time. We didn't know each other that. Well and so may not like we do now but it seemed like the way our relationship has gone. It seemed like the right thing to do because otherwise were walking, you know, 75 feet down to the sidewalk and then coming and then walking all the way back. And I just knew that what would happen is instead of just freely going back and forth. We would say, well, catch you another time. And so you we both agreed. Let's put a gate and so that we can just go back and forth between our two yards and I mean, I don't have any idea how many times we've been through that gate but we have moved Furniture through that gate with you.

17:11 Mulch in a way of a wheel, barrels going through there. And we are always going through there to have our little parties or BBQs or dinner things and it's it's really I think it's emblematic of the way. Our friendship is gone that we wanted to like you might say you would open a dialogue with somebody when we open the gate, we put in the gate that will open this relationship. Definitely good to be clean. It. It it really says when you see that gate when people see that gate and they they kind of look and say, will you know, how did that happen? We say we wanted to be able to go back and forth and to share, you know, our lives with each other. We didn't express it that way, but the gate says it,

17:57 And after Florence of the neighbor, on the other side of us are there side of our house, their fence came down, and had to be replaced. And I said now, you know, there was a gate there between our house and your house too late to the other party. And so she was like, well, I don't know if we need a gate and everything and I started mentioning about our gate and the relationship that it represented at the end of which she said, I'm going to put it, I'm going to put a gate in. Yes. It will have a gate between your house and my house and there is now a new gate there that we can use to go back and forth. That way also puts a beautiful gate that we had to change the hinges on that swings. Both ways many, many times everyday, right? And it is emblematic of art are close to friendship and decorates it. And it's, it's

18:57 Yeah, maybe you got that neighboring. Feeling sort of height. Our yards are almost 1 in the evening to sense because we were there before you, we had been introduced to residents of old Wilmington, which is an all-volunteer 49 year old Organization for everyone who lives in downtown Wilmington, between the river and 8th Street and from Red Cross over the castle. And basically it it's tied into preserving and enhancing the beauty of our neighborhood. And we were already a member of that and mentioned that to you right away, you got involved.

19:57 I was already involved and we continued, we continued working together through that organization. You, I, you wanted you nominated me. I think to be the president of the organization at one point. And then once that happened I asked you, if you would take charge of the committee that would disperse money for projects downtown beautification project safety projects, you know that the crosswalk the the Segways for the police department, all kinds of beautification things and you took that on in and got that very organized and Rowe gives generally a little over 10:10 $11,000 in, in gifts to different museums and projects during the year. And that's one thing that you really got involved in a lot of fun.

20:56 There's a lot of things happened, you know, it was our relationship developed and Blossom. That was a fun time that we both know. There's so many things, we've gone. I'm thinking back on no relationship develops through, just a lot of sharing, we shared contractors the first contractor that I think I

21:27 Well, I wasn't there first or second. But anyways, Dave de Palo Verde Street for you. And you recommend you removed from our house and sold it to somebody. Yeah, we did. We have the Pirates David. And then again, emblematic of our relationship then but then you got Tom. Yeah, then I then I now have been using Tom and in recommending to my son and you know, for his projects and so we've done that back and forth. The number they have I'm with my gosh. It's almost he's work for you or I or maybe

22:26 Now, for better part 14 years. So yeah. Oh, yeah. The other thing I think it was interesting about is you and I both were I would say pretty much corporate types of guys. I think you were a little handier than me, but for me, my main skill, when I moved here and bought this old house because I'm apparently an old, how person was writing checks that that's what I would do, but as the years went on, you start to realize that we did well, at least we both realize that we didn't want to just write checks to people to do work on her house is if we were going to live there and really enjoy the house and takes a lot of Maintenance and attention to eunos detail and things. And we

23:27 We would enjoy it more and

23:30 And get more out of the the experience of being stewards of these beautiful home. If we could do some of the work ourselves. So we gradually began to learn how to replace some siding to do. Some other projects that will kind of repetitive and time with someone who was very amiable to working with us and teaching us. You then bought a lot of tools. I remember so that you would have your own tools to do this when you purchased the house on Front Street, but that I think was interesting because we also I think I kind of inspired inspired each other that you were learning to do something and I'm thinking well if Dale if they'll can learn to do that I should be able to learn to do that. Now if

24:21 If a handyman can do what I'm not quite so inspired because that's their job. But if you can do it, then I can do it and then maybe you saw me do things and then thought well I can do that or we can do it together and that has been a very fulfilling aspect of being Neighbors in these historic homes. It really is something that

24:45 It is, it it's one of its one of a common elements of living downtown. That brings people from all over together. You start with a common interest in Old homes, because no one forced you to move their. You made this decision on your own and just as I did and I didn't know how my retirement was going to go. I didn't have a big plan. I thought you just relaxed. I mean, I didn't know and we bought the hold house and we did anything but relax then if it became a full-time job, but an interesting job and I think a meaningful job went when I look at the homes in downtown Wilmington Wilmington, now in the historic district compared to when we first moved here, there's been so many improvements and, and the neighborhoods are just as so much more beautiful, and it it just makes it more fun. So, so you have a common basis with all these people in that.

25:45 You own an old house? And so, who do you use for a plumber? I mean, there's a lot of areas of conversation because we're all old house owners at some point. But yeah, you be surprised my father who passed away years ago. He was probably disappointed that I was never handy at fixing pretty much anything and the door with my brother and it's interesting. When we purchase the old home, you really did learn to do a lot yourself. Couldn't afford to hire someone to do something, everyday that, take some attention. But it's a loose board or a mold on the corner of your house. Are you going to leak, or you got this or that? But there's something going every day. And again, back to her swinging gate. We're constantly helping each other. Who do, you know something?

26:45 Something that keeps you busy. A lot of people. I mean, we talked to you and I both talked to a lot of retirees who moved to the area and they want completely new construction, low or no, maintenance at all. I always just think they must have a lot of hobbies or something because I, if I had no maintenance and and you do nothing to do on the house. I don't know. What I would do with my time, this my time is committed to a lot of, is committed to this, being the steward of this house and then keeping it in good order. It's something to be proud of, and to maintain and and it it brings me together with my neighbors. And so, it did just take up a lot of your time. What you do and I guess a side benefit of all of that fixing and tinkering. We both learned and that's a journey. But, you know,

27:45 It's something I see. Is it brought our families together? And, you know, maybe you're swinging gate, but every day, you're asking me what I'm doing on how to do what you're doing. But you know, our family bond. Like, I've never seen that and all the places. I've lived up, never had that relationship with a neighbor that I share with you and your kids are some of my kids. Did you work a huge impromptu fish frying it just sort of happened. The next thing we have a dozen people dozen neighbors there and we're cooking fish and eaten on the boat rides together. We've eaten out so many times and so fabulous.

28:45 You know, I mean and loves cooking but I love her cooking that bonds me to the neighborhood. It's probably that type of relationship and you know, even as you know, I guess I just don't know how it is in this day and age that you you have that kind of I think about is an old-fashioned thing where families stayed in a town and you had you near aunts and uncles everybody was around and you had deep relationship with neighbors because their family have been there forever and your family, but we were nude ever. We would have new to the area and either one of us were from Wilmington, but we developed our own Bond right there, you know, I got a fabulous fall in there and even maybe not to us the heaviest agree that we are but knowing you've been in, I've been in virtually every neighbors home.

29:45 In blocks around us and that's rare. As I was in, if you ran two or three homes over your tenure there, that was sort of the effort. I did not know your phones are working on. A May one, ask you a question and then they say, can I come and see your house? And then you say will show you can come and see. My house is under contract with another thread in bringing us. And the community together is we've got this huge commonality, and and historic preservation, and historical meeting foundation, and all these organizations. And and roll are working diligently to try to maintain this and, and enhance it take to for the next generation. And that's that's what we're going to do. Where do afterwards? We're passing on these.

30:45 Connie cones to the next younger generation that hopefully will take pride and keep them going. While ours are now over 150 years old and we wanted to keep going for another 150 years, but we were gluttons for punishment that both of us have not only have we restored our homes, but we ventured out and restored their homes after we finished our hopes, how many ounces are 3/4 and give lots of free advice, hopefully useful to a lot of other people restoring their house. This stuff. I've done two homes. I mean, it's just sort of a toy stop. It is why we do that.

31:29 You don't and it's a it is life Journey. It ready as we're just two words for a while. And you know, I look at the folks at support us like Legacy Architectural Salvage to have a place like we have in Wilmington where you can go and get boards that are 150 years old. You can get moldings. You can get Windows resource. That is in the historic. Wilmington Foundation, still make recommendations on what to if. You don't know someone that they'll recommend the tax credits, you know, it's not all of this work. Even when you do it yourself, very expensive is 3 times more expensive than new construction, you know? The wiring you got to

32:29 An old plaster walls and not hurt to get new wires sneaked in. I mean, it's money, money money and it's great to have places to go and get tax credits. That may be offset. The small portion of the cost. It certainly encourages them and we didn't even touch

32:54 Hurricane Florence, we didn't even touch on what that meant for our homes and for the neighborhood and how we pull together. But we are you around your home for 7 months, 7 months. We are out of our home for 13 months and now we're back in and we're back in insurance insurance, but it was very heart-wrenching to go through a second restoration Inc. There, and you don't got a great neighborhood know, we're protecting the neighborhood when you think about it, you know, a lot of things, you know, your email just recently just had a meeting with the Department of Highways and the city about, you know, traffic that you can devote some of your time to also,

33:54 Our retirement years are full to the brim, but he's some Landscaping. Right? Safety traffic speeding. Anything. You know, I'm 72 and I think you're a couple years older and lice changing little for us at our age. Just a little bit. You know, what are you thinking about? Where are you? What are you thinking about for the next while?

34:38 It's a tough question. I mean, I thought we had some plans in place and then I talk to you and you told me what your plans were that you're going to just stay put you just going to stay in your beautiful home and you're not going to make a pre-emptive move your just going to stay there. As long as you guys can, as you can still enjoy it. And it it kind of resonated with me and I thought about it a lot. I guess it. It's kind of thrown our decision up in the air a little bit. I didn't mean to cause, you know, I know, I know.

35:14 But it's it, it's again. It's just it's just, it's an important milestone in our lives and we're choosing to discuss it and share it with each other honestly, and openly. I mean you're saying this is what my wife and I are talking about and I'm saying the same to you and it it's meaningful and it's it's real. It's not just happy talks, you know, that we're really talking about some of the struggles and and and things that we're going through with, with the, you know, as you get older and you're saying, can I keep doing the stairs? Well is the stairs. A good thing? Maybe that is a good thing. Maybe we should not jump to it just one level and you know, so there's all kinds of financial the maintenance, you know, all this stuff, but it's nice to have somebody to share it with radios, you know, your painting rooms and my wife, I'm color-blind almost everything, should be a pain to Brownsburg.

36:14 You would an officer sounding board for fall designed to write all colors and all styles and I appreciate that. I'm going to rely more and more than that. But anyway, yeah, I guess I really hope that we're going to leave our home as he is, will hire help. But we're going to stay in there as long as we physically, and mentally can, and we'll send our home off to the next Legion of stewards after us.

36:48 Let me know when is still in flux, you know, with that in mind with your plan. Their our plan is still in flux a little bit, but we'll see how that some more discussions on that. We're just not ever packing up again after Hurricane Florence on the walls. That's what goes Roberts. Been fabulous, a friend to feel the same. We found Mabry Mabry were after we found it and I think you're the only couple that has a tear in my eye the other day. As you started to share that, this could happen at some point and all that would suck. I hate to lose you when they are in any way that we could, damn. It's been a good discussion.

37:48 All right, sailor cap.