Ena Wanliss and Dean Wanliss

00:00 So I'm Nina Wanless and I am 58 years old. Today's date is January 5th 2021, and I'm in Atlanta, Georgia actually in Berkeley Lake, Georgia.

00:14 And I am being one of those. I'm 57.

00:18 Today's date is January 5th 2021.

00:24 Where you located at in Berkeley Lake, Georgia

00:30 So then we're going to be talking about our relationship right and when we first met so we can maybe talk talk with you. I'm coming from a freshman from Southern California going to Buffalo University of Buffalo.

00:48 Then I met when I was there met my friend court and Mark call him sus.

00:55 Been on my baby vitamins or Caribbean Student Association meeting and interviews me to Inna actually where you were late. I was there on time and he can seduce me or introduced you to me impressed with you. So yeah, we had that very nice evening at the Caribbean Student Association. And then the next day actually you saw me. Yep, you're walking to the hospital with some Richard books bigger than you and I hope you have a real gentleman offered to carry my books for me and I was actually quite impressed and we talked that day again and was able to find out that we're both.

01:55 And family from was in New York on your family was in the Bronx from Queens and so on that day, we we have lunch. I think if I recall right on campus of UB campus and I'm following our that day again, I think the next day or the next day but within the week I was on my way from campus cuz we you lived on the Amherst Amazon Main Street campus, right? And I had just come back from one of my classes on Amherst and I just cut back to the main Street campus come off the bus bumped into Dean and then you were on your way back from his from Main Street and I jump back on the bus believe it or not till the bus back so we can continue our conversation.

02:55 And again and another nice conversation and then I invited you to dinner prepared meal for your math fact. I had my own Dutch pot and I met some Corey Corey. Yes, you told me that the way to a man's heart through the food.

03:36 But I remember also through that time. Cuz you know you were like you said you were transferring in freshman and I was a senior getting ready to leave Ruby and you wanted to start a relationship and I will do that and I said absolutely not I have no time for relationship. I am Focus. I'm out the door and I'm heading home to the New York City and you told your family, but did you tell them?

04:09 And when she want to talk to me, I don't want I would not talk to her.

04:15 So we we parted always but being with present for when I graduated and I came home and then even though we're still good friends dealing with call me every single night. I was at work. I was working in the ER and IR anime about a guy that has a right to preach 11 shift. I finished and by time I get home by 11:30. That phone was ringing last call for the night.

05:15 Paying the long-distance relationship friendship for four years until he finished and then I would go back and forth because I was a part of the Caribbean Student Association for the different events that they had going on, but he would call me every night. And I remember, you know talking with my sister and and sharing with her and she's the what what's wrong with you nothing wrong with it. I'm not sure yet. So trying to get me to change my mind and but as I said, we continue a relationship and then I'll beam

06:01 But he came when he graduated and then came back to then we started today not your woman erupt one your ass is so basically friends for some more by the 50-year. We started our relationship and then the proposed to me on his knees and propose to me and I accept it and so we've been married now for 13 this this this May 31 years. So it's been a journey of wonderful charity. And now we are as I said, we have two beautiful children. We have a daughter that some Christmas lost.

07:01 And so we are just overwhelmed with all the blessings that we have a result of our Union June Stroke by stroke, June 13th, 2014. He has a stroke and so they will Begin work out, but just not feeling well so I can put my phone or call 911 stroke the next. Call EJ EJ. I think I'll have a stroke.

07:39 So he's been on this we've been on this journey together and it each day is getting stronger and stronger. He's so he had to have a little speech impediment but and then deficiency on the left side of the unit and spending our time together by rehab of the Pacific that's close to the house.

08:15 And it is everything you know your address. I didn't think that relationship.

08:29 If I might just interject I might think it would might be interesting for you or your children to hear for you two to talk about how the stroke has impacted your relationship. What do you think? It's how it's affected you either nextival you're positively as a couple and what has it. You know, how has it changed if at all the Dynamics of your relationship as a couple

08:52 So I can start by saying when the stroke happen is like someone turned off a switch. So I have to I had to make lots of adjustments. I had to make sure that with his focus is an impacted his vision the speech and and his Mobility. So we we do crew your creator just be creative and what we have we do, you know, we we we get a special aids to help for being to be able to see things we get special aid for him to move. You know, he will last for kind of like an electric chair has some power to it. So if it helps him to move more but response to your question regarding a

09:52 No, just no adjustments, you know, we celebrate each Milestone. So it's not a matter of fact that we let the stroke take over our our relationship. We are in control. So we try to modify thing and do whatever we can celebrate that. I said celebrate each Milestone each birthday everybody, you know the exception because of covid-19 able to travel this year, but we Embrace every moment of a zipline in Costa Rica. That was great.

10:34 Weather in Singapore English manor address

10:39 Now he listens. Like I said, he loves and parent books on tapes. We have Audible so he's able to listen via the audible and just passed Christmas with me got this new Echo box which allows them to hear the music even louder and see things up close cuz he can't see the TV as clearly by before so we were able to have something that's basically in this in his lap for him to be able to see things will get better.

11:18 Lalalalala

11:30 And as a result of that I'm grateful.

11:45 I want that people cover their eating. I don't want to let Lisa know quite different questions for us to talk about if you want to talk about health issues. If you want to talk about your family, this is your time you have about half an hour left to talk about anything you would like to just have stayed for history and for your family.

12:13 Well, I was talking about the kids.

12:17 I'm very proud of my children. My son is the Georgia record for the 800 meter and record at UNC.

12:29 It's not his own nonprofit organization in 11th grade.

12:34 And then my daughter she's amazing.

12:38 2002 the Lost feeling in the Emory prison law still at Emory.

12:45 And she's great.

12:47 And see on this type of introvert individual that has made many sacrifices, you know, usually have young folks that want to go out and do different things. But she made those sacrifices in order to pursue her chewing she loves to travel and she's been so how many continents thing for multiple continents continents and have passed enjoy that now she's feeling the pressure of law school and not having as much freedom, but in three years, she'll be looking back and saying that the sacrifice once it was worth it all my son is as as as being as indicated is about to get married so very very excited. Unfortunately Cove post. Monday was supposed to get married this last year September. So now they'll be married and in this coming September, so we're very excited for that and do the Kobe.

13:47 Not being able to see all of our family. So, you know, I'm just to be able to see folks again. We do you zoom a lot now and I'm actually seeing belongs to his Students Association and they did a planning a huge. Where is Monica tuition. Would you reduce in Jamaica?

14:17 Because Jamaica you have to pay for high school does not free social organization raise money each year to donate scholarship to children.

14:31 I have prayed for the room and board and bored of everything.

14:40 So we are both I'm from a very large family and I do want to join this time to share about I'm a family of 14. It's a blended family but you know little bit with all large families there are ups and downs and and and also concerns but I just wanted to make sure that my family knows how much I care about them. And even though we may have had differences along the way it is important for them to know that and that I hold nothing against my family members and their I hope that our family could become more united how we were when we were younger kids, you know, as I said, I'll both our parents my parents have passed on and as a result of that, you know that they were the glue that kept us all together and I think to that time we've had me to set some challenges along the way and differences but I am hopeful that family will be our units how we were

15:40 Stone again

15:42 I know your mom and I just sit here with us right now.

16:02 And she's not able to deteriorate but we do know that you and your daughter passed away a couple years ago.

16:22 So she's now at home and hospice actually as they prepare for her.

16:33 What are some some stories that each of you might want to make sure your children and and future grandchildren?

16:41 I would want to hear about some of your your family, you know, some some interesting and important times that he could you had with your family's when you were growing up or when you were a child. Is there something that you think is important for your children and grandchildren to be able to hear?

16:57 Well, just to know that our relationship has siblings is still strong.

17:04 I talk to my siblings daily.

17:09 And bigger Street

17:14 So I would say some early that as I was indicating earlier that we have a very close-knit family and most of them are in the New York City area do have some that are in Florida and up in Maryland. But when I think back as it relates to stories, I told both of my children. Are you the one thing that we do we do I travel twice or three times a year back and forth from Jamaica to the states and it was just that time of us meeting our cousins meeting with with with other family members. That was that is so special and I remind them every day that is important that you do you remember your family and always spend time quality time. Cuz no one knows what tomorrow will bring then the other thing that is important.

18:14 Keeping God first and trusting and having that Faith. Cuz no matter what God is with you two out everything you have. They said you might have some ups and downs, but as it relates to knowing keeping that knowing that God is in your midst and In The Presence at all times will carry you through.

18:36 You think you know what the spinner in my life?

18:45 Am very active in my church. I'm on the finance committee.

18:51 That's the way I get back.

18:55 So grateful that I'm still here most of all.

19:01 I could have been a different story.

19:06 Yes, we are very very involved in our perch. We're both members of the crossroads Presbyterian Church here in in Georgia and actually grew up in the Presbyterian in Stone Mountain. I grew up Presbyterian. So was one thing when he met me he he converted so he converted and actually started my church in in Far Rockaway in Queens at 32nd Street and church so I'll go.

19:53 I don't know. And if he cannot at this one.

20:08 So now thirty years later after the kids finished up and decided to do my PhD it has been a dream of mine actually initially started off wanting to do medicine and but now God has a plan and I ended up working where I am working now. I work to CDC and I've been there now close to 20 years. I'm so even though I'm not what they do the MDI. I'm in public health and remain there and I'm excited because last September 2019 September I was accepted into the PHD program. So I'm excited because I've completed

21:08 Cool, I'm probably one of the oldest in the classroom, but that's okay. I am adjusting to being around all these young folks who are quick on the computer and able to do things much quicker than I can but I'm still hanging in the air and Dean is my little assistant. So cuz now with everything shut down. So I go to class remotely two days a week and so for about 4 hours from the two evenings that I go he listens to me and he helps me when I'm reviewing stuff on my son wouldn't have to sound so he helps me that way. So I'm still forever grateful to him cuz I call you. Can I call you know by Friday? I call him my boyfriend because he's the one that listens to me when there's no it's just the two of us in the house. And so he listens to me when I make my when I'm reading or right

22:08 In anything, so I found that even though he can speed still contributes, even he might think it's not much but I think it's a whole lot because of the fact that is it helps me if I'm going through process Mildred Church pages in 30 pages documents and reading all these pages and getting his thought on it. So I just wanted you to know that I appreciate that you might not think that I appreciate it. But every time I can I interrupt you innocent program in public in public house. That is correct. I just said that year and a half out and so I'm quite excited for that so that I'm able to be working on that.

23:03 So you are what are you reading now team a book. Are you reading that? He'd like I said, he reads a lot and the other thing working does religiously watches that are the Sedin is and he knows all the answers so he doesn't almost of them, but he he reads a lot. So what are you up to?

23:36 Michelle Goldberg get College excellent. Excellent book

24:00 I like one of my way.

24:09 Stuart wood

24:13 Lisa scottoline

24:17 He was a lot of books last minute.

24:25 I need anything that's going on with a person. Do you know the one that I go to to get the sea stays on top of it?

24:47 Can you tell us a joke about my leave Courtney Courtney said that you are punching above your weight trying to get to get me some young 30 years later. Now, you can say look at that. All right, it was worth it right for assistance.

25:20 Do you guys have anything else you want to talk about? If so, that's fine. And if not, if you feel you've talked about what you want to talk about we can end it now. It's up to you if you show up you wanted to.

25:46 Yeah, they were able to make some adjustments and they brought them up. They strapped him in so that he could at least experience. They the zip line. So that was. And I will just wait I will wait for the Cobra to be over before we make our our next trip. I'm not sure it will be going yet, but definitely on our list. Well, if you want to wrap up team say how much I love you and I and I

26:39 Continue to pray for you pray for your health day for strength for both of us.

26:46 Look forward to another another another 30 years or more so much on storycorps today and time with you too as well as Hillary.

27:17 Trulia