Ann Smith and Lisa Veglahn

00:04 My name is Lisa McGaughey beglin. I'm 46 years old September 13th, 2010, Kansas City, Missouri, and I a man's daughter.

00:16 And my name is I'll give you my full name and radula Vic McGehee Smith. I've been widowed twice and my age is 85. I'll be 86 in November.

00:30 Is September 13th 2010, Kansas City, Missouri? And I'm Lisa's mother.

00:38 I guess I'll start with a question. That's a tell me about cuz all the stories. I don't know Sam supposed to ask you something serious will start with the stuff. I know will tell me about where you were born and who you were born to my parents were born in Yugoslavia and Diane and Peter Ruggiero Vic and my mother was brought to the United States at 8:17 to marry my father who she's never met but I'm sure they had a happy marriage for for lovely children. That's what I'm the first is it true. I mean do you think it's true that they she met him maybe the day of their wedding? Is that what you re days before they found a room and and I don't even know if they sure can't answer anyting came and how old is with he and he was 10 years old or so. She thought she was really married to somebody so much.

01:38 I ordered and I asked her once or did you leave a boyfriend in Yugoslavia? And she said of course I did. Oh wow. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and then you were born how soon after they got married when she was 18 and then for kids pretty close you every two years every two years old my kids about where where are you guys were born. I mean sort of the difference you were all born at home, aren't you? All right. We had a midwife or are you know who came to deliver us at home? And

02:14 So I really I don't remember my sister being born. She was I was only too but I do remember the boys the Midwife coming in in the we were Eastern Orthodox Church of the priest came to baptize has like two days after we were born no chances in the house in the house. But then did you go to church member going to how old were you when you would you good kids go to church when you were that young and eat. And I was the one that went to church with my dad because my mother by then and I was having babies all the time and so in the Eastern Orthodox Church, there were no pues and you stood in the men went to the right in the women to the left and he stood for an hour and a half and half human have to sit behind that the women weren't like they're burning man. You didn't see it when I was 7 years old.

03:14 Did Mikan but did Mick and Mike and Peeta go to church with you guys? I remember that Daddy and I were the two who went to church that's interested in anyone. Did you ever remember I mean is no cuz Daddy always said well Mom state has to stay home and cook for Sunday dinner and watch the other children. And did you walk to church or did you have a car that we had a car and went ahead. Do you remember I mean, do you always remember having a car? I can't remember when you said I do remember hearing and I remember my dad didn't believe in having his Manning money in the bank and I remember going with and when's and I don't know how old I was but to buy a car and he had $2,000 in his pocket to buy the car and he's appeared at the big wad of money with a rubber band the story about when you and Dad bought your first house. We're jumping ahead. But I did that such a good servant about Pap, right? So anyway, so

04:14 Dad and I bought our first house and and then got a 30-year mortgage and we were so happy about it and had all the family from both sides over and I was saying I was so wonderful. I don't have a Rose Has It's such a young age and daddy caught me in the kitchen and said and you were known this as for 30 years have and I always told you to tell the truth. It's always I don't think it hit me. I don't know how old I was when I figured out that you grew up during the Depression because you know, I wasn't ever I never heard those kind of stories and why I mean I kind of know but talk about why I think that was all different Friday and some people Daddy had a little store and so I never felt like we were before because we always had food and it was in an ethnic neighborhood. It wasn't just Serbian. We in fact he could talk five languages. They were Hungarian Russians Pole.

05:14 You should know I didn't know how to speak other languages of un so daddy only went to first grade and he had to help his dad B Shepards. Do you think he did he have any formal schooling that you know about now, I think just first grade and I went to see you've heard this before it's either I went to college and I was an active now I make some business major and when I came home and looked at Daddy's book that he had figure it out in the county says, I'm just like I learned in college she did it on his own that's incredible. Yeah, and then my 7 my dearest memories of growing up were at the he let me work in the store when I was only 8 years old and I had a little pair of scissors around my neck on a string it because we

06:14 Everything was in Ben's like rice and beans and flour. So you had to weigh out to get little brown paper sacks and weigh out the different Commodities and then wrap string around them and Cat and I remember those Little Caesars for some reason and did the rest of the kids get to work in the shower. I was the only way I think I was my favorite think I think I think you would your sibling say the same thing. What is and I always think it's so interesting about Bubba to I mean, I don't think either of them. I think either of them that they had been alive at a different time. We would have done already. She could have been at the chairman of the board. She was so a very nice Young when she like to work with him, didn't she she did she she did and then later on in life that you

07:12 But my uncle's Tavern and I was so embarrassed and I went to college I would always say when people say and what did your parents? What is your dad do all he runs a restaurant and a bar, but well, that's what I always grew up thinking. It was a restaurant then the first time we saw it I was like, okay, this isn't quite like a restaurant like on the store to I mean the store was that little house that we saw it right wasn't I mean that in the house but wasn't that the store it was a little house and there was a little area I would like a little sitting-room behind the store and daddy would take a rest day or sometimes he would even let me watch the whole store while he rested but I can say I like ice cream and candy and rice and beans and night, but I just I mean, I'm just so fascinating to me in terms of the time. That there we know when you look back historically cuz it will you were born in 22. So you were looking for

08:12 You know that there were that it was during the Depression and that that you will not only had a store but that you were living around people who are clearly experiencing something and my dad was so kind that there was a book for an account book for people who didn't have money to pay and how many books are were in the store but a lot and everyone who lives in the neighborhood and so if they didn't have money like they would come in and I remember like a pound of Bologna was ten cents a loaf of bread with Sanchez and he never turned anybody away who said where my family is hungry and he would say well, alright. We'll just right in the book. I mean would you say that was the word that describes when you when you if you had to describe him. I mean, I didn't know him that well, I mean, I know, you know by the time I really remember. He was pretty sick and sinus.

09:12 And what about Bubba's?

09:15 And hers I just think about it the other day and she was very loving on a scale of 1 to 10, but she could also a 10-year out if she had to yeah. Yeah, I will let you know because she was busy with the other children and I remember checking on her friend saying oh I need to ask you something but she was busy with his two other children when she was so you actually think about how young you right? I mean, if you didn't you had your first kid at what age by then she had four kids, right? You know, I mean that was more typical then but to be administered of hard to even imagine Generations ago that that was what I mean, of course, I remember her see a lot of the qualities. I remember of her actually remind me of you in a good way not complicated part of me.

10:15 I mean her her sort of sense of of, you know, she was so extroverted and so fun loving and so just, you know, kind of didn't care what people thought about her, but I'm in a great way. I mean, she just had such a person such a distinct personality, or she did you knows him. Even your even friends of yours still remember her, I mean you probably don't remember a lot of your friend's mother's the most of your friends have distinct memories of her because she just made a memory. She it was member and she had a wonderful sense of humor, and I think all four of us in our family. We always bragged that we all had such a great sense of humor, and I think we we got that from her cuz Daddy didn't say much cuz my was like, maybe she charged more so you're all I know you got a word in edgewise, but when I think that they didn't have any education and all four of us went to college and not only went to college but

11:15 We went to graduate school. I was going to this when I was just going to ask you why how did that happen? How did it go from a family of shepherd and a woman who was brought over from Yugoslavia at age 17 to the Next Generation having for kids with graduate degrees. I mean, what do you think you remember it being talked about at home education hour and we weren't like for us to always do our homework. I've we just did it the end and I don't remember them giving you a song about years of saying all we want you to really do well in school and but we all got scholarships and I was valedictorian and so is my brother's we had to valedictorian to Saluda to Terry and the four of us. Is that right? I don't know Mike and then they're the boys did Sports to write. All right, they both.

12:10 Head football scholarships in doubt PT went to Yale brand on a scholarship. I remember talking to Herman Hickman in the phone and who is the big coach in those days and and then Mike went to Washington leave him and went to the Gator Bowl and now and tell when it but you didn't speak English. So you were till I was three or three and did your parents that mean did you what did you speak in your house?

12:37 Well, they likely the people next door are named Miller and they couldn't speak English and their daughter was one of my who was my best friend Korean mart. And so I learn to speak English at their has maybe I learned earlier than 3:00, but it makes a better story could also do I know they they kept wanting are they encouraged us to speak in his and they won they just talked to her being when they wanted to tell us if you know something don't they didn't want us to understand you guys couldn't understand. What point do you did you survive with? No, I went to Serbian school every Saturday. And so I just have to learn to know Serbian and and I still I called pigeon Serbia. I remembered and what were the church services in what language is move away from?

13:37 You know kind of wanting to be American and now, you know, don't we all wish that you knew more Serbian or should have had more connections to the Serbian Community but at the time it's just that was where what everyone will hear you were in the states and that was where you were going. And and yeah, I think it's interesting that my dad was a twin Peter and his brother was named Paul. They both were in their late teens working in steel mills near Pittsburgh PA Paul missed you this obvious to most that he went back and daddy Peter stayed. I remember when we went to visit. We got to visit the area where daddy was born and my wee wee wee it was 1982 is the year of your bride and run.

14:37 And no and no I remember driving up. I mean a member we sorta spent the whole day looking for you know, where do love a field Riddle That member with ketchup and overly tired and we bought a new Mercedes and we headed towards in Zagreb and they watch it. I had it parked right by the front door and then you flew in from London and then the McKees are best friends flew into I thought what we have to find I knew the name of the town wine is so we found in there and I thought was someone has to speak English in this little bit. So we went to the bank as that was a banker would know but I can't throw and finally he said he remembered somebody in the village had been to visit their relatives near Pittsburgh and she spoke anyways, so he closed the bangs and we

15:37 Minnesota car and went to her has and then she said all I know the renewal they say they don't live right here in the village. They live up in top of the mountain and the lawn today in member. Then you drive the Mercedes. I don't close until we have this job and walk the rest of the way and my brand new Mercedes. I mean, I'll never forget standing up on that when we got out of that car and literally wasn't there like there was like one it was a one-room home like a log cabins just dinner and I Circle right and then like a still in one corner and pigs running around and who came out it was it was it would have been Paul's wife, right? The oldest woman would have been Paul's right Bubba's contemporary your cousin. So Palm boys. You're my brother made fun of

16:37 I know and I still can't I mean when I think about that, I think that would have could have been me. I mean remember there was a little girl coming out of the man inside and she was playing a flute and you play the flute and I thought my God if the other twin didn't come back and I would be hoeing potatoes in a black.

17:00 I know it's late and I would have been writing. My kids would have been like running the still and the pigs and yeah, instead of driving off fan. Mercedes when they when they finally start to figure out who you were and who we were and how they were connected and he's the woman was The Interpreter that we had brought up from the village you they said there were four kids. They said when was a pilot cuz I knew PD work for the airline one was a doctor one was a teacher and one married a rich man. One of the course I saw the Mercedes and you're like, well, that's me, but this is actually the second Richmond member, but it's right in this one woman.

17:49 We still don't really know nobody. But again the other thing member we always talk about is how gorgeous it was. So it was like the Blue Ridge Mountains so I can see where Paul nature Lover. He couldn't say I'm saying the Bessemer converter go off and and sleep in a bed at the boarding house where someone else had just gotten up and right now I'm at a terrible thought I was going to say no, I guess you can see why one would go back and one but didn't didn't you used to sort of grow up with like, oh, why would Paul have ever gone. I mean with their this sense of why did he kind of give up on Americorps summer was at night. We all know that wasn't discussed that much Paul came first for some reason and earn money to bring daddy over there were twin is Peter and so his parents must have been religious Peter and Paul do the best names in the Bible that had fast, but but but

18:49 Wake me when we were on that trip. Was it in the cities? You know this but your Serbian we would swear it was sort of coming back but people like the waiters would sort of look at us let you know we were in these beautiful restaurants and beautiful hotels in you'd be speaking Serbian and they'd be sure to looking at you like well for one thing is the thing I asked I said all I want all of you in order to eat the traditional dish that I grew up on Twitch with his stuffed cabbage in the name is adamant. We were eating at the Intercontinental Hotel in the waiter came up and I said, I hope you are sad and on the menu and he just looked at me like Miss hillbilly and he went and ran and told all the others.

19:34 I still didn't get it till we like got to the top of the hill and all of a sudden member your Serbian came back what I mean all the sudden you were able to talk and it was like it was a hillbilly it was like you were a different octave dialect meaning in this fancy restaurant in New York City in like how that would like to know but how I mean I just I guess I'm so intrigued when there's so much to talk about cuz I know you talked about it College soar to what that experience was like. Well, that's it. Yeah, I remember writing the name radula vehicle and we had to have the first weeks of freshman had hell week and a little Sandwich Board you had to put your name in the front and back and I'm going to write an ordeal of it and it's hard to get the letters on it. Okay. I don't never be rested with sorority raining, but I did make it snow yesterday with my head nice friends and they took us off.

20:34 What year 4642 and my roommate was also the only other name and I wish we were they put us together as roommates and it was in all Presbyterian school. But then you have like the worst room and all the other worst room off campus up in the attic. It was a fire in that something. Anyway, I moved into the second floor of his that when one of the other second-floor girls decided to go home, that's exactly what I mean. Like I said, I've heard a lot of these stories about growing up but it's still just know. How did you meet Dad take a session we all right and so at Westminster College where I went every gateways and knew they had Naval he was a Naval Air Cadet neck Naval pilot. And so every 8 weeks a new group of them would come marching in to win the end of our little

21:33 Can we all stand in the corner and look them all over that way? He looks cute and after he left you I never really thought it, you know, he would be the one but it turned out he was so that we don't have tell all the secrets and then cuz you know that Uncle PD that your Uncle Mike I think that you should tease you about going from Aunt renewal of it to McGehee to Smith again, but and then you ended up when did you move to Kansas City?

22:07 The first two averages I think it was 1955. Okay, you know what struck me the other day. This is jumping ahead. Cuz I don't know if we guess we don't have to be chronological but I was thinking well, I'm getting close to the age that you were when dad died right as in 51 around that are alright 24 from it was burned 24. He died and 75 10 or 11. Yeah, so I mean that's gets into more serious thing but it's hard. I mean I can't and then now I'm getting divorced so mean in terms of being a single parent is that the mean there weren't a lot of single parents back then.

22:55 And we lived in Milwaukee at the time any no dad died in Denver, but then what you and I stayed in Milwaukee for one more school year not in 9 months by Beckett.

23:17 Baby died in August. I guess we did say for whole school, and then by the time we put the house on the market and went back to Kansas City.

23:26 And it but I knew I had to work because

23:31 There are dead. We didn't have that much money cuz he's in Sanchez died in his early fit. Right and plus I wanted to and so I did go to Rockhurst and took a short term refers to see what I'd be best suited for and it was the two things were drama and diplomacy. So I went into real estate and did you like realest I mean did you like real estate? I did. I mean I wouldn't want to do it now, but then, you know what my job, you know that I'm most proud of his that I was a college instructor young Todd. When I think how few women were in the economics field and I never had one day of practice to eat it and why didn't all these fellows were coming back from the service and I was younger than they were so did you

24:24 Teaching like the fall after you graduated. I graduated in June. I started teaching at the college because it was for my sister went to call is Mick went to Bethany and there is a blank space in that department. I said, I'm just going to go and try and get that job. That's amazing. And most of it was the dean. You hired me like me until I started dating and that's all right. Yeah. So many always at me that was always an interesting we didn't like him at all and he didn't like her my sister, but he was a dean and a professor, but we won't go into that.

25:24 That's all right. So we know he was but didn't we did you have any game is 18 years older? Wow, but then he lived to be 91 in Carrollton. This friend are his brothers went to bed and he's at and if you could high winds Road. Decide whether I should marry dad or Kirk and so she said if you still have a husband.

25:49 I remembered what he said. Oh, yeah, and he's Joseph we kept in touch for the rest of our life, but I think Oak was a true love of why I mean, I guess I shouldn't say that but I mean, I think that your relationship was out with a wonderful. Well, that's it and

26:12 It was I was just so fortunate to me and I have really had two wonderful husbands very different very different very different and who really loved you? I think you would even with dad's. I mean, even though you had to go back to work and see if it's sort of like the same thing of you living through the depression. I never felt like oh, I have a single mom and I can't play in band and I can't do the things other kids are doing a mean somehow you made it work financially. I obviously didn't know what was going on behind the scenes and I don't remember you having to go to work at 6 in the morning. I mean obviously our lives were totally different but I don't remember financially feeling burdened. I'm sure you had a step and I didn't that much when I think back and that duplex and we ended up buying its yes. I mean, I don't know how you made that work you well, I guess it's your

27:07 Well, I had enough money from her house in Milwaukee and it was so cheap 55,000 when you were a year old we moved. It was 37 5 6.

27:25 I love that house. But let me know you glad we came back to Kansas City that seem like oh, yes.

27:36 And got to think Dad when we first moved back was making $600 and I mean he was better raises me that my God. What are we going to do with all that matters?

27:51 For one thing I rent we rented a little house and 71st Street. That's where we first moved 5109 71st. I move so many times but I remember every dress and that's something I now know where you've lived the longest since 1981 weird. Can I still can't believe I know I can't eat I can't either.

28:12 McKeesport was

28:14 When I guess you left there when you were Seventeen sore, when you went to, we moved from our to remember we lived in the house. I was born on 5th Avenue and we moved across the street are really so I didn't live in the same house even in growing up. So that's right. Okay. Okay. So what would you say some of the things that you talked about being an economics professor, which is amino there other things that you think of as they are particularly well in it we are

28:42 That's the most Pratt when I think of someone who is like I guess I was 21. Yeah could walk into a classroom and get face 40. There were two women in the class in about thirty-eight men.

28:58 Well deserved I worked in the store so many years and that was the thing. I was in but even in my classes at Westminster, I was like one of the two women and I last did Nick ever take a class for me or no and they put it in the mail and she said all her friends said why don't we take statistics with your sister. Older men in your class, but they were all older than most of them. How long did you tell me? You're just too and then it got married and they did you ever think about teaching after you got married or did it just wasn't that or working at all after you got me know and I really love being a mother and I love preschool children. So I never even thought about it and then when they went back to when the boys were in school, you just didn't I mean no did people that did women, you know.

29:58 No, that's it. No, I mean I don't my friends words.

30:06 But a lot of I mean it actually even now you know where we're at with Prairie not a lot of their lot of moms who don't work. I mean this a little bit of a surprise these days it is I'm jealous. And so now I have to ask you some questions questions, but first I have to say and I will get all teary-eyed. I'm so thankful to have you as a daughter and in the deer living so close as one of the things I'm thankful for every day me to I'm glad I'm here too.

30:45 Anyway, you want to ask me questions or do you want well and I'm I'm proud at welfares. I'll just say I'm proud of you the what are your parenting skills and the way you're handling the divorce in like being a single mother and I'm sure they're frightening moments to doing that. I think about you a lot of different for me because Dan is around obviously it is different than it than it was before but it helps to have you in town too and that's why I don't want to move into it out of my house. I guess if we're we're only 5 minutes away from each other and all the retirement places that I've looked at or too far away so I can drive but still

31:36 Well and you have three children who were successful. I'm proud of all my children that you are all high Achievers and I don't think we need any of you just say or backward down and hit the books, but you were all gifted you skipped a grade from kindergarten to it.

31:59 First grade did you three so well when we all have advanced degrees to I mean in a row and I have to thank that because I was able to do that without student loan. No, I don't think Wrecking Ball but no, I don't remember sort of being yelled at about school. I just heard it was the expectation was we were smart. So I sorta looked up to them too and they were both successful in in college. So I just sort of assumed that's what you did because of the age difference of my grandchildren or 7 to 37104 Drake Rancher, but I'm thankful to still be alive and and see Margaret in Robbie's basic growing up because the other grandchildren lived in other cities of Bob and recs children.

32:54 And this grandchild is 37 and thought about that. He's 10 years younger than you are to hear about what and I wish I knew more about your culture and MF feel like I know about it through you but I think all of us John and that whole generation we all feel like we're so removed from you know, just two generations ago of our history and our culture, but I guess that's just typical immigrant stories, you know, I don't know.

33:30 Where are the older I get the more thankful. I am that I grew up in as a household at there were times when I

33:40 Wasn't so proud of it like my college years when I had to write the name rejuvica, and I thought that would be holding me back from doing things. But the only one that Mary disturb so she's right stay connected to the she's doing when they can make Fatima. That's right. I know I know I wish we could do that, but

34:02 When I do have anything else, I mean, it's not like it makes me think of that Frasier episode member the way he wants his dad to videotape like, you know, I like to see it Casey's ice and soda if you're watching this video I'm dead now, that's not the point of the story on your story.

34:27 We all I'm

34:29 I'm thinking back as I say and I'm so thankful that I did have a good relationship with my father because it didn't help me have a better spiritual life. I mean a good spiritual life, which I'm also very thankful for that. I have that but since I had such a kind father hydralight to my heavenly father, will you do have a very strong spiritual? I mean I had to do another thing I admire of you and I assumed sort of always got you through to you know to husband's dying and other cancer and yeah, I'm a Cancer and a stroke survivor. I praise the Lord and I can still talk and walk and Vanessa your space. I started don't think about that growing up in the church that way but that probably be home and I I do feel like my work in life is to

35:29 Try to bring cheer into other people's eyes. And even when I go to the doctors offices or so to make up Andrew, so glad you came in because you always have something fun to say to us. That's so I figured you can either try to be positive or gripe a lot. So I thought I'd try to keep to myself. I know we'll know I mean my friends would all say that about your sense of humor and that sort of the way you go about life and stuff. I mean, I definitely think that's what a lot of people would describe you as you know, and I'm sorry for what I have so many friends, but the sad thing is as I get older is that my friends are either getting attached. Either have Alzheimer's or physical problems and is just accepting.

36:25 That that's going to happen that's reality. Now I know but I mean, yeah, you are lucky to have something that's the that's the sad part of having so many friends. Is that the more connected you are than the more I mean a lot of my friends, you know, I've lost three or four close for 8:35. So me not to compare but it is hard to know, you know, but I mean you think your face gets you through a lot of those. Oh, I do I try to think every morning before I get out of bed. This is the day the Lord has made let us rejoice and be glad in it. Daddy told me to be honest. Let's go see your way is probably better than mine. I do love you. This is fun. And I we could do this for like a couple hours though. I know that's it because we both have so many interesting stories.

37:25 Probably 5 that I don't and I probably know more than Rick and Bob do I would guess well, that's right and I am very thankful that you're too cuz I didn't grow up knowing my grandparents that way and I know no matter how long you're around that they're going to send them always impact their lives as well as mine and that's a blessing everyday and you've heard this. My favorite lines is it when I was thirty-five I said joke and say I'd probably have a baby when it was 39 and then I had you instead of your been the greatest blessing on my life. So and the boys are already 14 and 16 and dating and embarrassed by their know once you were born that he loves you and maybe sad and so forth, but not at all. We didn't make him babysit al-adha.

38:19 Will know and have him know I mean and you've been a wonderful parent and a wonderful mom. Well, thank you for me. It's true. It is true and continue to be so well Nike I told your children. I can't think of one negative thing about Lisa and growing up Robby Martin keep saying my grandma is there must have been something about her that you didn't remind me to remember.

38:49 Not that much as I guess that's one thing as you get older, I do remember maybe a few things about the boys, but nothing Horrible. No nothing bad, though.

39:01 Is a lot of know it was that day off and Rick offices. Mom can't you think of anything? I always mention things about how cute he was in preschool and he'll go Mart. Just thinking it's just a 6260 year old right now. I think we're supposed to be wrapping up soon last.

39:32 I'm just thankful. We're both in the same town. I know I'm thankful we get to do this today and I'm anxious to hear it. I wish I had said something funny to say I haven't said too much funny, but I'll think of it later High kids. I think people know all right.