John Willey and Megan Monaghan

00:01 Hello. My name is Megan Monaghan. I am 30 years old today is July. Nope. It's not it's June 20th or 21st June 21st, 2012. I am in Greenwich Connecticut in my house with my husband and I'm going to be interviewing my husband John.

00:27 I'm the husband John Willie.

00:30 I'm 34 years old today's date is June 21st, 2012 and my wife and I are in our apartment in in Cos Cob, Connecticut.

00:46 And I'm with my wife.

00:50 Jonah. Maybe we could start out by talking how we met telling how we met. I'll set the same Oak acid the same it was a cold January afternoon in the Stamford Connecticut train station and Johnny were both waiting for the Amtrak Acela train to Boston. We noticed each other across the lobby and we didn't exchange Wyndham exchange conversation, but our eyes met and I was I was intrigued by him.

01:24 Later on the train we boarded the train separately but early in the ride. I got up to go to the cafe car on my way. I passed John and he was facing me on the way. And when I came back from the cafe card, John had switch seats. He was facing the opposite direction and just as I was about to pass in John stuck out his hand and he said do you want to have that drink with me? And I had I had thought okay sure. So I sat down and that was it.

01:57 Can I comment my version?

02:05 Best day of my life so far. I was probably the most probably a turning point in my life because I got off the train and I knew that something special had happened though. I will say the conversation was a little awkward. You weren't the smoothest a couple things about you struck me as a bit odd, but I got off the train and I knew I had met somebody important somebody who is going to mean something to me and I said to Zach you were smooth enough on the train. I said to Zach I got off the train and Zack was waiting to pick me up on the platform and I said Zack I met somebody that's what I said. I said Zack I met a boy.

02:50 I remember when I met Zach the few be a few months later. He commented that we had that Fine Romance.

02:58 I think we have A Fine Romance.

03:01 I think what I love most about you is your integrity you.

03:08 Live

03:10 Entirely true to yourself and you don't compromise your principles. You don't compromise your morals for any situation or any person and you have the self-confidence and it and you're at peace with yourself to know how to always follow your heart and do the right thing and I am not so steadfast. I waver who I waver with the mood and with the crowd and with who I'm with so you are an inspiration to me to be a better person and have the same character. I do think I'm doing a better job.

03:44 Yes, Monday, I love about you is your temporary convictions though? I've always said that.

03:51 You're so passionate that you that you take something. You you decide something and you you're so intent upon it and even though it it may imfa that usually fading only because there's something new and exciting that you that you've read about or you've heard about that you that you want to think about and pursue for a short while

04:17 I think that's so fun and keeps it so it keeps it so Lively between us that you're always coming up with new ideas and fun things. What's that most recent?

04:30 Most recent idea. Well, the vegetarian idea comes up every once in awhile.

04:37 India India India India is is going to be the best time of your life and you don't even realize it yet. You're so gung-ho you were so gung-ho about wanting to do it and now you're scared.

04:53 I'm scared to be away from home for so long. I'm scared that.

05:00 It's just knew that's all I'm going to be spending a month in India. I'll be teaching at a school in Tamil Nadu in the South and from what I hear from everyone. I know who's ever taught at the school and come back to New York is life will never be the same you will forever realize that here in New York in the United States in Greenwich Connecticut of all places we are

05:26 Living a dream. Where does the luckiest people on Earth? What a hopeful is that I know I'll have that realization. I know it. Well, I'll know I'll just see what I see every time we travel some places just that how we live is so different from how the rest of the world lives and we should always be mindful of that. But what I hope is that

05:47 Months after India years after India, I don't forget it is that I can kind of weave that into my daily perspective forever. What are you most afraid of in your trip to on your trip to India?

06:02 Being homesick

06:04 What are you most afraid of in the whole world?

06:11 I am afraid of losing you.

06:16 Gun sucks being apart.

06:19 For a month that's going to be the longest where we've ever been apart. I think since we met each other in 2005 we dated for 5 years. We've been married for two years. I'd say our wedding was probably one of the best days of our life my life. At least we had every single person who matters to us together in one spot dancing all night.

06:46 Everyone agrees. That was the best party that ever been to but was just so incredible. I remember you and I standing in one of the rooms and up in the hotel looking down outside on the Terrace rivermist dancing. And I remember you and I both saying like this is absolutely incredible. How is it we've got College friends family high school friends work friend just the whole spectrum of relationships in our life have converged in a single night pretty pretty great.

07:17 Yes, I remember standing there and wondering if we were going to think back on that moment. I do remember I said that.

07:26 We have to remember that that moment and this is probably the first time we've discussed that moment.

07:34 Every summer the first few days of summer after school finishes and the last few days of summer before school starts again. I float in Long Island Sound and I lie on my back and I just float in the waves and I think I have to bottle this moment because there's going to be a cold Dark Day in February when summer and the warmth of Summer and the freedom and luxury of time seems far far away, and I'll have to reach into this bottle. I think I forgot to do it in the cold dark days of February. I forget to remember back to floating in Long Island Sound and I just think of I hate the winter.

08:10 I don't know what made me think of this. But remember the trip. We took to Niagara Falls.

08:17 And somewhere along the lines on that trip. I started or probably before but at some point I was just bursting to tell you I loved you around at every moment. I felt like it was just going to spell out of me.

08:31 And I don't know why I had I was holding it holding back so much, but I just was I don't know why and and I remember that whole the whole first couple days of the trip as like I want to tell her I want to say it. I want I said, I don't I don't think I was nervous. I think I just wanted to say it.

08:52 And I just wanted I didn't want it to be.

08:56 I don't know if I wanted to be a big thing or didn't want it to be a big thing or what but I wanted to tell you I was looking for the right time. I knew you excited when you said it. It just felt like I remember there was silence everywhere, even though there wasn't silence I heard silence because I was so focused on you. Tell him I remember we were sitting on Lake Ontario and we were looking across and we can see the city of Toronto but behind us was Niagara and we are having that picnic. Remember I spilled wine on your pants.

09:32 How's it going? Trip? What do you think about what do you think you spilled wine on my pants? And when you spell want in my pants, you said, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll bring them. I'll bring them to the cleaner and get them get them clean for you. I'm sorry, and I said you don't have to do that. I love you.

09:50 You'll have to take my pants to the cleaner for me. I love you.

09:55 And I think you said it back.

09:59 Sorry, what was your question? What do you think has been our best trip?

10:05 One of the best trips, I think one of the best trips.

10:13 Southeast Asia

10:16 Because it was a long time that we were away and we could really get deep into the trip and not be not be stressed about things.

10:31 And and we we got to see friends for part of the trip and we

10:39 Covered a lot of ground it try different Cuisines we had challenges.

10:46 The heat diarrhea

10:50 Never put us on the radio. You said that word?

10:55 I think one thing which struck me when we are in Vietnam. It was so hard for my parents to understand why we wanted to go to Vietnam because their generation was the generation that was figuring out ways to not go to Vietnam and you know that my mom and marched in protest against Vietnam and my dad had sweated it out, you know watching TV seeing if his number would be called out then, you know, they all had friends who had to go. Unfortunately, I think many of the people they saw go came back and we're pretty wrecked from The Experience. So I think from my parents they were like, I can understand why you would want to go that country. It might be like when we have children and our children's house. They're going to go backpacking in Iraq or Afghanistan and it might be hard for us to understand why that's a place of the PO because for us it's been a place of sort of scariness and a lot of like unknown

11:50 Your dad was in Vietnam. What has he told you about it?

11:54 He has some stories. He told me he was he worked for the communications. And so he made sure the towers Communications Towers were always up and working. I think he also worked really related to that was a radio station. And so he worked I think in the same radio station as the Good Morning Vietnam movie UFC that

12:21 But he has

12:24 She doesn't talk all that much about it, but

12:30 But I remember my uncle talked a lot about it and Vietnam. I think probably Dennis's wife could have been divided into two parts before Vietnam and after Vietnam cuz nothing was ever the same for him after coming back right now. It's true. I miss that ass.

12:48 But

12:50 It was good to go. And go to good to go to Vietnam partially because of all the stories that I heard from had heard from Dennis and some for my father. It's good to see it and see it in a place that was less.

13:02 Less

13:06 Ugly as what they had talked about. It was beautiful place. I felt in and I wanna go back you tell me when was it? What was your favorite trip with Chuck?

13:17 I have fits of memories from different reps. Most recently. I can remember sitting in cafe latte Argentina at the Y at that wine vineyard. We woke up on my birthday and we opened up the doors and we sat on those Adirondack chairs and just The Vineyards were ahead of us in the Andes mountains were behind us and

13:38 I think unfortunately that trip we both had a lot on her mind so we couldn't completely just open up to how incredible it was that we were in the southern hemisphere at the foot of the Andes staring at these Ancient Ancient mountains.

13:53 I have great memories of Porto in Portugal the first moment. I first remember we had arrived in Lisbon. We took the train up the poor don't remember how hot the train was running up to Porto with our honeymoon and we got off the train station in Puerto and we're tired. I just felt like a little fatigued and the honeymoon and just started and it wasn't sure what to expect that. We already come so far and he took a taxi from the Porto train station to our hotel and I remember that song that Jay Z song New York was playing and the contrast of this hip recent hip hop song by Jay-Z in the modern city of New York contrasted with the ancient but maybe not ancient to sort of medieval Vibe of the old city of Port it was pretty interesting. And I remember when we got out of the taxi just a feeling of that sort of Sea Air and seeing the lights twinkling on the Douro River and the port house is across the river and I just felt like okay. This is a good moment.

14:53 We had a lot of good trips. Yeah, we're lucky very lucky that we get to see see you then out some of the places that we've seen. I want I want to ask you.

15:06 Of all of all the of all the different periods of your life. When do you think that you were feel? When do you think you felt the most alone in your life?

15:21 I think that since I've met you I've never felt alone and that was right after college, I think probably

15:29 X in college

15:31 When

15:33 I had a boyfriend who is long distance far away and I didn't feel as if I like had a secure group in college. I had some individual really good friends, but we weren't all part of the same group. And so I didn't always have the experience of hanging out where the group was all really good friends, It would be Matt and I are Zach and I and I guess I didn't have the same strength of relationships that I had in high school so I can remember taking the T into Boston a couple weekends and had a wandering around Boston by myself wandering around, you know, I'm going over to Cambridge wandering around Harvard Square by myself and not feeling lonely, but just heard of being aware that

16:17 You know, my parents don't know that I'm here. I'm by myself, and I'm not sure that anyone is really missing me back at school.

16:28 Okay, so

16:30 So then

16:33 Just do you have any regrets?

16:38 What's your biggest regret not related to school. But yeah, cuz you know, I kind I kind of think maybe I made the wrong choice in college.

16:49 I think I regret.

16:54 I regret maybe two two types of situations in my life. I can't think overall I have been so incredibly fortunate and

17:04 I don't have a moment in my life that I can point until I regret that that was the undoing that was the moment, but I regret any situation where I wasn't honest and I regret any situation where I wasn't

17:23 Acting like a person that I would be proud of I guess that my parents would be proud of and in any moment. I was doing something that wasn't with Goodwill.

17:33 I regret.

17:36 What about you? What's your biggest regret?

17:41 I think my my regret is similar. I haven't there are a lot of small regrets. I have and a lot of them I think or when they were things I said or did that were selfish.

17:54 Or self oriented to self oriented.

17:58 And

18:02 And I think back in those times and ice and I think about how much how much other people in this situation deserved attention or deserved to hear something nice about themselves that I missed the MS may have missed opportunities.

18:20 So I try not to miss those opportunities opportunities now.

18:24 A night in and this is what I think and I should tell you I think you are the most supportive.

18:34 Person that I know

18:38 You

18:40 You have seen me cry recently.

18:44 And

18:47 A couple times I guess.

18:50 Her a couple different reasons

18:53 And I didn't cry.

18:57 And cry more than three times in the time before I met you some letters and went to college the time. I met you that that 5-10 years and then since I've met you I feel like I've

19:16 I felt so much more comfort with you in and I know how supportive you are and it enables me to really show you my emotions. I love you for that.

19:31 I love YouTube. Do you think you've cried because life's just gotten more challenging or because you feel more comfortable to be emotional.

19:43 I think both.

19:45 I think I think.

19:48 Life hasn't I don't?

19:52 I don't suppose that I don't I don't I'm not suggesting that life is hard at all, but I think that

20:02 The things that we think about now and the concerns that we have and you know our parents and with

20:11 And I'm making sure that each other's taken care of. I want to make sure that you're taken care of and

20:18 I want to make sure that my my sister's happy and my my parents are are happy and that you know.

20:25 That they you know that I pay them back for everything that they've done for me. And I don't know if I possibly can with all I can do is give them time. That's all they want. No gifts.

20:38 I think that I agree with you by remember so lucky to have what we have not that life is so hard. I think getting older is just so hard to go back to the question of regret.

20:51 My one regret I probably have is.

20:57 When things mattered less I didn't maybe cut loose a little more and try more things and get out there more and talk to more people and take more risk spending of always been a little shy little risk-averse and sort of played it safe with almost every decision I've ever made of probably played pretty safe and maybe a regret I have is out of self-preservation. I guess taken more comfortable choices.

21:28 But

21:30 It's like I don't know how I thought of that.

21:33 Getting older. I don't know. I don't know where that came from.

21:39 Is there

21:41 Is there a way that you can make sure that you don't continue to have that regret?

21:46 So are we really burning right now by?

21:50 Buy something where maybe we could take more risks than we are are there. Is there something that were not thinking of that we could do.

21:58 What rest can we take?

22:00 Already going to India for a month. I'm going to India for a month of this kind of risky. That is that is risky.

22:08 But you'll be okay.

22:10 And I'll see you at the end of it for two weeks.

22:14 Heading it's hard to watch. My grandparents be sick now and be so old and when you're younger.

22:23 We know I don't know why I guess I thought you knew I should have taken more risks because when you're younger, what is it? What does it matter? Right? So you're 18 and I think when I was 18, I felt like 28, I felt like the decisions I made were so huge. But now that I'm 30, I think I'll my gosh I was so incredibly young you have so much more time to learn and not everybody get Second Chances, but there's more Second Chances when you're 18, then when you're 30, and now that you're older, you're just so aware. I think of your mortality when you're younger. You have endless time to waste your time to waste. Where is you and I there's not enough moments in the day to see the people we want to see to do the things we want to do just time for ourselves have time for each other and it goes by faster and faster and I see my grandparents right now my grandfather.

23:14 Just came home from the hospital today and they're both he and my grandmother are there just old. Now. I never saw them is so old until recently and I picture my own parents. I can't even conceive of it because right now they're healthy their young and the way they look now, I think he'll look forever and just the thought of seeing them age inevitably think of yourself aging and

23:42 I feel as if I'll be young forever. I can't even imagine being old.

23:53 I'm sorry that you didn't get to use this recording for your grandpa.

23:58 Maybe this summer.

24:01 That's what this recording was originally going to be at 4.

24:06 I'm going to ask you what is

24:09 Who is most important person in your life besides you besides me?

24:17 I think I think my mom and dad.

24:21 They're dead most important people and and

24:27 And I think I'm one of the most important people in their life.

24:32 And I think that it goes both ways in that.

24:36 That I'm the most important person in their life in and

24:42 And they're the most important person in each other's life, but I don't want to

24:50 It's such a great opportunity to be near them. I I I want out not miss out on that opportunity.

24:58 Tell me about your mom and dad.

25:03 Well, my my my

25:07 My dad was

25:11 My dad is okay. My dad is really.

25:17 The most even-tempered man and nicest man that I've ever met.

25:25 His generous that's funny cuz I think my dad is the most even-tempered and kindest man I've ever met.

25:35 Your dad's pretty even-tempered and kind.

25:38 Actually your dad and my dad are two to the two most even-tempered in time minute.

25:45 But I know my dad better and he has always been so generous.

25:54 And and

25:57 I think he

26:00 His his approach to life and his attitude and his self confidence or something that I inherited from him.

26:13 And he is also the most optimistic man. I know.

26:20 And that optimism is I think a

26:23 Very valuable trait to have a choir from him.

26:28 Glass is always half-full. A three-hour trip will always take three hours. Sometimes two and a half.

26:38 $1,000 vacation will always cost $1,000 sometimes $500 at least in in in in in at least in in in his predictions and it's just so so nice to stupid to think about all the

27:01 Relaxing times that I spent with him, maybe even just playing around of golf for talking about I'm talking about the gym.

27:13 Different different things that he's done different places that is traveled.

27:19 He said such adventures and and I fear that I haven't heard them all.

27:28 Tell me about your dad.

27:31 I think tide with you. My dad is the finest person I've ever met. I just can't believe how lucky I got when they gave out that that's because he

27:45 Since

27:47 My earliest memory has

27:51 Systole modeled

27:53 Come

27:55 Like he's a consummate gentleman. He's calm his controlled his thoughtful. He is generous. He's kind. I've never heard him raise his voice. I think once in my whole 30 years. I've heard him swear once and

28:13 It's just extraordinary how everyday I get annoyed and explode at small things. I snap at people I use filthy language, you know, my it's terrible and I look at my dad who's definitely experience so much more hardship than I have and he I think what he's gone through with his own family. It's just incredible.

28:39 Incredibly hard what he's gone through yet. He remains so supportive for everyone never allowed the disappointment or frustrations. He's felt in his own life to infiltrate his personality. He just remains as even and thoughtful as ever.

29:00 Maybe it's because he's he's fairly religious and I wonder if he's privately more religious than I even credit him for maybe that his face gives him this does the rudder to sell straight.

29:16 I don't know. We're not it's just could be he works, but he's made that decision to be that person and he practices every day being that person but you and he are both models of just composure and kindness.

29:33 And I just think true gentleman.

29:36 Fun is interesting how we have similar fathers and you know, they say you marry a man like your father but you are actually you are like my father and all the important ways but different enough. So then I felt comfortable marrying you that I wasn't exactly marrying my father or quirkier than my father.

29:55 What do you mean by quirky?

29:57 Okay, so when we went on a road trip to California you brought a garbage bag full of all the clothes. I didn't like and threw them out along the trip every time she wore an outfit you got rid of it threw it out and then flew home from California with nothing on it two weekends ago. You were lying on your back in the backyard shouting at the top of your lungs at 8 in the morning because it was exciting to the dog and the dog was running around enjoying it you

30:23 I mean, unfortunately, I can't remember their countless examples of how quirky you are.

30:28 Can you think of an examples of your quirkiness you're going to rollerblade to the morning dance party the other weekend?

30:34 Adventure call

30:37 Let's talk about when we first moved in together until see we all want to talk about my mom.

30:49 Good use of 10 minutes.

30:52 Okay 2 minutes.

30:54 My mom

30:57 Is

31:01 My mom

31:03 Don't know how to describe my mom.

31:06 You say that well.

31:11 I think my mom is

31:15 Is a saint

31:18 She

31:21 Truly

31:23 Decided when she had me and when she had my sister.

31:29 That she was going to give everything over to us.

31:34 Everything all of her energy and all of her will and all of her time.

31:43 Was

31:46 Turn over to us when she had us and

31:51 As a result, I think she was able to

31:58 To instill in my my sister and me a

32:03 A perspective on life. That was that was that's truly truly enable us to get through some some any any of the difficult times that we've had. It allows us to tackle everything in that that we think might be difficult and say Hey, you know, this is just life and we can move on I see an end. She model it for us and in the way that she and maybe this is why I'm quirky one of the reason I'm quirky but I think she she can go into a funeral and be the life of the party not in a bad way, but she can be so comfortable and she's okay laughing at a funeral and she makes other people comfortable laughing a little bit at a funeral not because it's not not in a disrespectful way, but she has a way of making people so comfortable in you know, uncomfortable situations and end.

33:03 Was that about her and I and a lot of people I think really admire that in her and so

33:12 I admire so much tonight.

33:16 And that ice and I I'm going to miss her and I'm going to miss my dad so much when I'm growing old like them, but I've learned so much from them that they'll never done never quite never quite go away and I hope I can come convey that and carry that on to my children.

33:38 Have a memory of my mom. We had this giant stuffed dog. And when we would walk to school in the morning because our the house I grew up in was right across the street from my elementary school my mom we would leave the house and my mom would run upstairs and open my brothers window and she would put this giant stuffed dog out the window and have the stuff dog wave its paws at us as we were walking to school and sometimes when you come home from school and the dog would be like post on the piano bench looking like he was playing the piano or she would post him like at the desk working doing his own homework was so funny. Mom has a good sense of humor. She worries about everyone though and that is a frustration for my brothers and I but it comes from a good place because she loves us so much that she can't help but worry and this worrying it totally takes over it. She can't sleep at night and she thinks about other people all the time.

34:38 And it's a sign of how compassionate she is and how much she cares about people. So I guess we have to learn to not greet her worries about us with moans and groans, but, you know recognize that it comes from a good place.

34:53 I think our parents are really happy that we moved out to The Burbs then we live near them now, but we did have a good time in New York, didn't we?

35:01 Yeah, what is something you remember about? When we lived in New York walks in Riverside Park with hazel since we had a dog. We got to know the Upper West Side better than we ever would without a dog.

35:18 Yeah, especially the sidewalks.

35:22 We everyday I would walk from our apartment on 94th Street. I'd walk a straight mile down on West End 284th North walk down Broadway and I would stop at barzinis to get plastic bags from barzinis and we'd walk all the way down and I can still tell you the stores. We passed we passed them baked by Melissa and the gelato place in The Food Emporium and Zabar's we turn around at 84th Street, August 8th bars. What is Zabar's 80th 82nd? I don't know we turn around around Zabar's I would walk up West End and I love to walk in Weston. I love those buildings on West End and on the weekends. We bring the dog in the Riverside Park and I can remember and this summer in the fall and spring when the Community Gardens were Bloom every time we took our bikes and we ride our bikes all the way up to the 125th Fairway.

36:22 Yeah, that was fun. What was your favorite New York memory?

36:27 My favorite New York memory.

36:33 I think I think my favorite New York memory might be.

36:38 Actually when we were in Chelsea.

36:41 Yeah, cuz we

36:44 With when it was approaching when it was reported approaching Christmas and Christmas time and I was in school and you were working but you were getting time you were starting to get time off. I thought next time we were so free Care Free and ready to go around Chelsea in Christmas in New York City and go on The High Line. I love I remember one Saturday night. We stayed and you were doing homework and it was around Christmas time cuz we're listening to Christmas carols and we are in our little apartment on 21st Street and I was making applesauce to remember that. I was delicious. I remember Chelsea Chelsea was the first apartment we had together when I remember is how easy it was to move in with you. It was a pretty big deal to move in with your boyfriend at the time and it just happened seamlessly. We just moved into his apartment on 21st Street member you and Tim moved us in and almost died during the couch up six flights, but we lived at the

37:44 Top of the sixth floor walk-up across from that elementary school and I can remember sometimes being in bed and hearing the Mounted Police Officers go click click click clack down the street and you know, Chelsea so historic was like Clement Clarke Moore Park. We know it's it's like a whole historic area and I can remember thinking if I close my eyes and just lie in bed and listen to the horses clip copying down. Maybe this is what people in Chelsea felt like a hundred years ago. I remember when we moved in one of the first a couple times in the first few weeks or maybe first couple months when we moved in I saw

38:23 I I saw Ethan Hawke in the Subway and then on on near our apartment and coming out of an apartment nearby us and I didn't tell you because because earlier in our relationship you had told me that he was in your top three.

38:40 So I had to I had to tell you that I had to had to resist telling you that you're one of your top three lives next door, especially given what we know about his antics.

38:51 I remember I had to leave for school so early to get there on time because the local train took forever the 1 train from Chelsea and I can remember like leaving it, you know, 6:30 6:15 in the morning and going outside in the sun in the winter time the sun would just about be coming up and I would walk, you know up to 23rd Street down 7th Avenue I-Pass like David Barton's gym and Billy's Bakery, why wouldn't not Billy's big booty bakery at past that in the Chelsea Hotel and I see the same people there was this man and his son who used to walk every morning at six-fifteen same women walking to work the same guy playing electric guitar on the corner and I just this funny and I thought I wonder if they notice on the same person that they see every morning. I can remember waiting for the subway and riding it up by two. That's so much reading done when I had that subway ride.

39:42 But I think you and I both loved being in Chelsea because Chelsea Market and Highline and Pitino and red cat and all those restaurants, but we probably really felt like New Yorkers and really felt home when we moved to the Upper West Side to think. I know I'm happy to be in, Connecticut.

40:01 I guess what I say about New York is we are the luckiest people in the world forgetting to live there. It's the greatest city on Earth. But we always knew that we were going to come home to to the suburbs. So we lived in New York. Like we we knew we were leaving. We took advantage of every moment anytime we went to the park. So we went to shows we actually went to the museums and there was some days when sometimes we just get our coffee from the card and New York Times and you know sit in the park and I would say so this is like what the real New Yorkers do but

40:37 We always knew that we weren't going to be there forever. So I think that wanted made us feel like a bit of a guest in the city that we did live in for quite you know, many many years. We still sort of always felt like gas cuz we knew we are leaving but it also made made us always look up and noticed the stained glass in the windows notice the architecture notice the community gardens in the park talk to the guy at the coffee. Remember the guy in the coffee car. My name is Miriam and then you corrected him. That's okay, but we are so lucky to have lived in New York.

41:12 Okay, I think we got to wrap up.

41:15 I'm glad we did our interview. I love you John.

41:19 I love you Megan olive juice.